Saturday Night Off-season Open Thread 2025-17

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I’m going continue the bit with the lists. Tonight, I present to you a list of things I like that start with the letter A:

  • Asses
  • Anal
  • Analysis (for work)
  • Assonance (because everyone picks alliteration)
  • Assertiveness (great character trait, don’t you think?)
  • Assemblies (at school)
  • Assurances (when things go wrong)
  • Assignations (look it up)
  • Assyria (the ancient land)
  • Assimilation (keep your language but learn the language of the country you are in!)
  • Association football
  • Assyo

I could go on. However, I need to move on.

So, aside from THAT, what is there to talk about?

Golf Update

I’m playing twice this Memorial Day Weekend as I’ve decided to take two days off, making it a five day weekend. Yesterday, I played in Palm Springs and tomorrow I’m back playing in LA.

***

Stanley Cup Cocaine Update

The second round has finished and we are now in the third round, also known as the Conference Finals.

The Stars are trying to eliminate the last Canadian team left. Tonight, the abominations that are the Florida Panthers and Carolina Hurricanes face off in the Eastern final. I propose we go back to the days when the conferences had names. Campbell and Wales, like God intended!

***

Other Updates

I met with Brick and DJ TAJ last Sunday and we are brainstorming a creative project that I think you all will like. It will be a visual extravaganza.

Last week, I also met Christopher Moore at a book signing event in Pasadena. He spoke for a bit and then he did a Q&A. I am happy to report that he is as funny in person as he is in his books.

I can report that he is working on a third book in the Noir/Razzmatazz series. The tentative title is Floozie and deals with the murder of the kid’s mom, who is… a floozie. He also mentioned that he is thinking about a third book in the Dirty Job series but that one he’s trying to figure out the plot. I am super excited to hear that as those are the exact series that I wanted him to write sequels for. I’m also very excited to read my signed copy of his new one: Anima Rising. It appears to be in the style of Sacré Bleu, which is the one I just finished and which I greatly enjoyed.

In that vein, he mentioned a book by someone else about the “geography of genius” which talks about how at different times throughout history, there have been specific locations where a large number of the brilliant minds of the time have gathered and produced things that last centuries. That seems like a really fun rabbit hole to jump into.

***

In this space, I will tell you what I’m drinking as I type this post. Today’s drink is: Trader Joe’s Sparkling Guava Juice Beverage.

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Your weekly Psych gif:

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Your weekly hot girl pic:

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Your weekly music video:

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One last thing:

Seriously, hat tip to Brocky:

5 4 votes
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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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WCS

The Matrix is broken again, otherwise, how does an NBA team score 101 points in a playoff game, and lose by 42?!

Brick Meathook

.

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Brick Meathook

Not that particular one but I’ve been on WWII diesel subs elsewhere. Nuke subs look very similar except they are larger.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I saw a womens’ a cappella perform this in college and it absolutey cooked.

Doktor Zymm

I kind of want to go spend 3 weeks in the summer on the shore of the North Sea now

Mr. Ayo

Good way to spend the rest of July

Doktor Zymm

I like swimming in the ocean. I’m guessing that water is super chilly but willing to give it a try! And midnight sun would be fun for night swimming

2Pack

It’s not too bad… in a wetsuit…

Doktor Zymm

I do have a 7mm for diving in Monterey, and a 3mm shorty

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

…and a 3mm shorty

“Hey, I have one of those too!” – Horatio

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yes, our household is also in possession of one of those.” – Deanna Favre, looking rather glum

2Pack

There’s A for Army… just sayin…

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also “arm bra”!

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Brick Meathook

LAX Terminal 3
05.24.2025

https://ibb.co/6cBx32Tg

Mr. Ayo

Which escalator did you take?

I would opt for 2nd from left.

Brick Meathook

None of em. I get wheeled around and go to the head of the line everywhere. TSA Pre-Check, Delta Sky Priority Gold Medallion First Class, and I also wear my submarine veteran ball cap for extra measure.

Brick gets his ass kissed at the airport.

jjfozz

Do you kjnow the juf muffic man?
I do.
He’s a dick

jjfozz

I am forcing down another beer. why caseu i’m dumb

jjfozz

First aid is basic goddamn common sense with some medialc shit thrown in

jjfozz

If you drink beer all day, and only beer, and then your wife cuts her finger, then you have to have your oldest son drive you to the pharmacy to get bandages. So, on one hand you couldtake care of your wife, on theother, well, you’ve been drinking all day so it’ s not that bad. Seriously I’ve had abotu 15 beers today. No lie.

Doktor Zymm

I learned the other day that fingertips can fully regenerate, bones and all. The stem cells that keep your fingernails growing repurpose to regrow the whole fingertip

2Pack

I had a friend who sliced off the top of hers on a slicing machine. I recall her telling me that they put something on it to help inhibit the rejuvenation.

Doktor Zymm

Interesting!

2Pack

She said it bled like crazy. It went right to the bone. Her kitchen looked like a slaughter house. ER team patched her right up. Couple follow up visits and six weeks later she was good to go.

Gumbygirl

I had an asshole boyfriend who cut the tip of his finger off when he was a kid. Don’t remember how, I’m sure he was doing something assholey. They must have put that on him too, he just had a rounded nub after the last knuckle. He’s the one that got smooshed by a bus in Texas.

Mr. Ayo

2pack is having a moment

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTj95MG1F/

2Pack

They go full up that’s for sure. Thier New Year’s eve, just about everyone participating, fireworks are famous here. And thanks for the opportunity, (like he really needs it) to post another, occasion appropriate, picture of Our Lady of Napoli.

marika
Doktor Zymm

How did I not know the term ‘heeltaps’ before now?

Mr. Ayo

I didn’t either. Though apparently I should definitely know that.

Doktor Zymm

I think it’s an old timey term. I quite like it though, let’s bring it back!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We visited the Assyrian exhibit at the British Museum and I can confirm that it is cool as fuck.

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Doktor Zymm

Did you see the other half of the Parthenon too?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We did! That was also super cool. It was neat seeing the same story (centaurs wilding at a wedding) portrayed in the National Gallery as well.

scotchnaut

Announcer: “You’re about to get married, what do you want for good luck?”

British Museum: “Something borrowed and something brown.”

Announcer: “Ummm, you already have tons and tons of that.”

British Museum: “Can I have even more?”

Announcer: “…”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If they ever loan any stuff to museums in Australia they can title the exhibit “Plunder Down Under”.

Jimbo

Coming soon from the studio that brought you Snakes on a Train…
The Assignation of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford 

SonOfSpam

Most of your A words have something in common butt I can’t figure it out.

Mr. Ayo

The lack of Ayo was a personal slight, if I’m honest.

SonOfSpam

I would have preferred that, yes.

scotchnaut

In women’s hockey, the Ottawa Charge and the Minnesota Frost will be going into a second period of OT and the pace is Insanecakes.

Doktor Zymm

Watching a show in Danish with English subtitles. I actually have to pay attention to what’s going on like we did 20 years ago, craziness!

SonOfSpam

Is it about Legos? Probably about Legos.

Mr. Ayo

It’s always about Legos

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Senor Weaselo
Mr. Ayo

Nap time over. Just in time for ice cocaine!

Don’t let me down again Carolina!

Mr. Ayo

Ah, they’re starting their backup goalie, Kochetkov.

That’s a bold strategy Brind’Amour. Let’s see it if pays off!

Mr. Ayo

lol, own goal. NOT GREAT, BOB!

Mr. Ayo

lol, 15 ECF loses in a row. Congrats Carolina.

Mr. Ayo

Yep, this will be another sweep loss in 4 games.

Gumbygirl

When that song starts speeding up-wooooooooooo! I was dancing!

Gumbygirl

.

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Gumbygirl

Lol, I posted the wrong one! But Happy Birthday, just in case!

Gumbygirl

.

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WCS

It’s Lil’ WCS’s birthday!

Gumbygirl

Happiest birthday to yer babby!

Brick Meathook

The groundbreaking Xerox 9655 copier

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scotchnaut

@Horatio

Mock Draft topic-greatest hot streaks of all time. Sports, culture, politics, war, sexual conquests, anything goes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Um, Horatio stepped out to buy a pack of cigarettes. But don’t worry, Rikki-Tikki-Deadly has got everything under control…

Gumbygirl

.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[downloads and saves that for Monday]

blaxabbath

[And medicare cuts kicking in]

scotchnaut

I’d be more impressed if you met Terry Pratchett at a book singing, tbh.

scotchnaut

Hmmm… Last I checked, Pratchett wasn’t an impressionable cashier with very few options.*

*I’m sorry, so very, very sorry

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Lulz