Saturday Night Off-season Open Thread 2025-21

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I’m going continue the bit with the lists. Tonight, I present to you a list of things I like that start with the letter E:

  • EDM
  • Eggs (scrambled)
  • Eggos (the waffles)
  • Eating (it’s kinda necessary)
  • Electricity (the song by OMD)
  • E-tickets ( you’re really old if you get this)
  • Electrical engineering (my major in college)
  • Enthusiasm (during sex)
  • Efficiency (at work)
  • Elephants
  • Etymology
  • Evenings

I could go on. However, I need to move on.

So, aside from THAT, what is there to talk about?

Golf Update

I’ve been playing A LOT! Last week, I played a two day tournament at my home course and did fairly well. A 93 and a 94 and I ended up in the top three in my flight. That’s $60 in my pocket and some points towards the championship. During the week, I played two matches. Technically three as the Wednesday match was two games in one. We played a Match Play against a couple of players while at the same time being their teammates in a Four-person team tournament. We lost the Match Play but there is a Consolation Bracket and we will move on to that. The four-person team finished tied for third! The next day, I played a 2-person Scramble against my boss and we beat him so he had to pay for our lunch. That felt really good.

***

Stanley Cup Cocaine Update

The Oilers lost the series last Saturday when they lost Game 5 at home. The Panthers took care of business at home in Game Six and that’s that.

The Panthers have now won two straight Stanley Cups and all the hot blondes in Miami rejoice.

***

Other Updates

I liked working only three days this week. I’ll have to figure out a way to do that more often. Man, retirement CANNOT come soon enough!

Last week, I watched a few of the Club World Cup games. I really don’t understand why people (Hippo amongst them) are shitting on the tournament. The stars are playing, the teams are taking it seriously, and there have been a few upsets. What’s the problem?!?

I am going to recommend something to y’all as a public service. I know Hippo will judge me WASPily, but this has gotten VERY positive reviews from Lady Balls.

In other news, I will finally start my workout program. This time, I’m going to mix in some sprint work on top of the weights. I’ll let you know how it goes…

***

In this space, I will tell you what I’m drinking as I type this post. Today’s drink is: ice cold water.

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Your weekly Psych gif:

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Your weekly hot girl pic:

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Your weekly music video:

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One last thing:

Seriously, hat tip to Brocky:

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blaxabbath

Is “Totally Obliterated” the new Mission Accomplished?

blaxabbath

I’ll be asking everyone I see all day this week if Turning Point is going to be using their voices on college campuses to get military recruiting dialed up for the Cult’s war.

Then I’m gonna make an honest but sharp comment about what fucking pussies young republican men are. I’ve found that, so long as you let the Vietnam-Era cowards know you think they did enough, they’ll let you feast on their own like a hyena too.

Last edited 10 months ago by blaxabbath
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

For posterity. Usually my predictions are about as accurate as Mitch Trubisky throwing left-handed after drinking a gallon of malt liquor.

1000001443
blaxabbath

::Stomach growls 1,500 miles away in her sleep::
“My father…”
/fin

2Pack

Ciao tutti. You forgot Erotic Buddy.
Good luck on the workout. Carve out a time slot in your daily schedule and simply make that a new part of it.

2Pack

I think I know what may help…

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2Pack

That’s why I get up early. There’s nothing open and no commitments. Some studies also think that’s a better calorie burner.

yeah right

Did the blood draw thing today and my levels are stupid perfect.

I’m going to ask whoever my doctor is to make me med free.

Permanently.

No.

No more.

I’m going to demand.

blaxabbath

Stupid Perfect does sound like the highest health rating available from today’s HHS.

WCS

BREAKING:

Live AFL action about to kickoff on FS2!

Horatio Cornblower

Well, at least before the world blows itself up I can say I’ve had a beer made with huckleberries.

comment image

It’s different. Haven’t decided good different or bad different, but I have 3 more to help me decide.

yeah right

In the old days when you bought a Disneyland pack of tickets, you had like 5 A tickets and that’s the kid stuff, the walk throughs, like Cinderellas castle and shit.
Your B ticket got you on Casey Jr’s circus train. Your C got you a monorail ride.

The D got you Jungle Boat and shit.

But the E ticket?

That was your Haunted Mansion. Your pirates of the Caribbean, your Mattahorn, your Space Mountain!

Hell yes.

Last edited 10 months ago by yeah right
Horatio Cornblower

Monorail?

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That’s more of a Shelbyville ride.

Last edited 10 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
Gatoraids
yeah right

Taj and I with a cribbage battle for the ages.

He took my dollar.

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rockingdog

Nice cribbaging! 💯

My lady friend just taught me how to play!

That’s Rockingggg!!!

WCS

Who is paying the tariff mark up on the MAGA hats?

fleshwound_NPG

top gun: maverick kinda aged poorly, didnt it

fleshwound_NPG

(also, the early strikes of israel stuck iran air bases with the last functional f-14 jets, iirc)

WCS

Old Man WCS: Vietnam
WCS: Afghanistan (sorta)
Lil’, Lil’er WCS: Middle East
Dook WCS: Alsace-Lorraine

Last edited 10 months ago by WCS
blaxabbath

You guys are a regular Lieutenant Dan over there!

Redshirt

Trump: “Why did you make me hit you, Iran. Don’t make me hit you again.”

Redshirt

Who’s looks more drunk right now: Hegseth or Rubio?

Mr. Ayo

JJ Fozz

Redshirt

(closes eyes and pinches bridge of nose) “Okay, who let Fozz into the Situation Room.”

WCS

/wide-and-bloodshot eyed Don Jr. Kramers himself into the room

“Hi, Super Alpha Bros! This EYETALEEAN-MURICKAN said he’s got this ‘bourble’ stuff for us to try!

//Don Jr. sniffs loudly, wipes nose several times

blaxabbath

Feels like putting a guy name Little Marco in a major leadership position for war is going to, in retrospect, be one of the first signs that these people have no talent amongst the ranks.

herodotus450

And I JUST got rid of my “Ayatollah Assaholla” tshirt!

Fronkenshteen

Just dusted this baby off from 1979. Remember how stupid? This was spray painted on every handball court on Long Island.
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yeah right

I was working at a Am/fm station in Geneseo Illinois when the hostage crises started.

We had the old AP news ticker thing in the back room with the 3 alarm, 4 alarm, 5 alarm bell thing and that motherfucker was 5 alarm.

I was working at an AM radio station in Barstow California as the news director when the hostage crisis was over.

I read the start and end of that crises in my serious news voice.

BC Dick

Oh no, but why? It works on any Ayatollah

WCS
fleshwound_NPG

-gop president
-oh no, approval ratings bad!
-bombs away!
-did that work? i dunno!
-do it again?
-a few more years of this…
-…oh no, recession!
-time for a democrat to half ass a recovery. again.
-oops, too half-assed!
-“that republican pres. candidate seems like a nice guy to have a beer with!”

WCS

(Neither W. nor Trump drinks)

fleshwound_NPG

and a big ol chunk of those that voted for him do not know they feer beer like a pinko commie liberal would

Brick Meathook

Those B-2s are fine machines, and those 30,000 lb “bunker busters” are pretty big weapons, considering it’s the Air Force, God Bless them.

But it ain’t atomic war until the submarine launched Trident C4 rockets join the party. My boat carried 100,000 ton warheads (that’s 200,000,000 lbs TNT equivalent each), with eight warheads per rocket on 16 rockets, each with a 4000 nautical mile range. 12.8 million tons of explosive force and my boat is now obsolete. The D5s are even bigger.

What I’m saying is this is nothing. Drink up!

Doktor Zymm

The operational depth of the bunker busters isn’t even deep enough to get to Iran’s main enrichment site, although they’re probably gonna just use a bunch of em until they get through

Doktor Zymm

Since we might all die in WW3 soon I think I’ll have another cookie

Horatio Cornblower

Yes. Yes, that’s why I just had that extra cookie. Only for that reason.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Samoas or go ahead and get on that warship

rockingdog

Tatis Jr with a 3 run Home Run! 💪

Padres take a 5-1 lead!!!

That’s Rockingggg!!!

Horatio Cornblower

Well, time to take the dog for a walk and see just how much they’ve jacked up security at the local dam.

Mr. Ayo

Do you have a picture handy of Lowratio’s dog sadle?

Horatio Cornblower

He doesn’t show up on film.

Not gonna lie, we’re a little concerned.

litre_cola

On to River v Monterrey.

Horatio Cornblower

THAT LAST CANADIAN ATTEMPT I CALL IT ‘AMERICA’S WORST (SO FAR) PRESIDENT’ BECAUSE IT INVOLVED A BUCHANAN FUCKING UP AT THE WORST POSSIBLE MOMENT.

litre_cola

Blue Curacao deserves to win this game. What a shit show

Mr. Ayo

That’s a proper USMNT level blunder by the Canucks there.

litre_cola

I am.in the basement pub with Deci trying with all my might to not lose my mind.

scotchnaut

All you silly boys thinking that WW3 is definitely going to start. Trump’s next roll of the die could result in him visiting a wizard in a Pizza hut, or drinking mead with Heath Ledger inside A Knight’s Tale universe, or a rookie defensive back playing against Randy Moss in 1998 or applying blackface to Al Jolson, or running over to the other farm asking for ‘the beet straightener’ or covering “Lime in the Coconut” or kidnapping the Coen Brothers while going over the plot of Raising Arizona or making a slurry to add to that very liquid-y coconut curry.

WW3 is only one of very many other scenarios.

Horatio Cornblower

Nobody likes Iran, so a wider war is unlikely.

That said, I probably wouldn’t be in a hurry to go to any large public gatherings any time soon.

Senor Weaselo

It’s important during this wedding season to know where the nearest exits are, just in case.

BC Dick

Oh I would love to hear that cover. That seems very tantalizingly possible

herodotus450

Ok if anyone asks, you guys all know about my flat feet right? I’ve been referencing them for years on here!

litre_cola

I pay to see them on OF.

scotchnaut

You’re a cop?

/as a Red wings fan I always though you were a cop out. So close…

Redshirt

Boy, I love being a transsexual, homosexual non-gendered furry. Hail, non-Christian Satan!

Horatio Cornblower

I’m just old and white. It’s awesome for getting out of drafts.

Doktor Zymm

Almost as good as being female!

yeah right

This feels like an alibi is coming.

rockingdog

Found a funny:

(wearing a sleeveless denim vest and smoking a cigarette) more fingers should be middle fingers

litre_cola

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rockingdog

That’s Rocking!

I’m gonna go to a Padres vs Giants game in August

That seems Rockingggg!

yeah right

Got a place for you to crash if you need it.

Doktor Zymm

Let’s see if I remember how to play Civ 6

Redshirt

World War I: Started with an assassin’s bullet.
World War II: Started with a Fascist Dictator’s ambition for revenge.
World War III: Started with a typo-filled social media post.

rockingdog

Lol

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Doktor Zymm

Gavrilo Princep thought he had missed his chance, but then stumbled out of the pub where he was drinking to find the royal carriage had gotten lost and ended up RIGHT THERE

Hitler was a shitty painter that even his fellow soldiers in WW1 didn’t like and who was hopped up on speedballs most of the time

So turns out all the WWs were started by dumbasses bumbling where anyone with two brain cells to rub together would fear to tread

Senor Weaselo

“Eh, I missed my chance, better have a drink for the road (to Styx).” And then he made like the song and took Franz Ferdinand out.

Jimbo

,

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Gumbygirl

Well, at least we have competent leadership in Washington, to keep us all safe.

Jimbo

Senator Shoomer is drafting a strongly worded email as we speak.

WCS

Sens. Murkowski (R-AK) and Collins (R-ME) are “concerned” and will “study it carefully” before siding with the rest of Republicans two days from.

Redshirt

You’re damn right. Save us, Illuminati!

scotchnaut

Soccer Update:

Canada is beating the unholy beavertails out of Kookacao 1-0 46 minutes in.

Mr. Ayo

I’m not hearing enough Sorrehs from them, honestly.

Jimbo

 Kookacao is not real and no one can convince me otherwise.

rockingdog

Arraez with a little base but and Padres score again! ⚾️

2-1 Padres lead! And it’s Star Wars Night!!!

That’s Rockingggg!!!!

Jimbo

Iran now, this is going to go well. jfc

Last edited 10 months ago by Jimbo
rockingdog

Damnit That is not rocking 😞

Mr. Ayo

What happened to the 2 weeks thing? Oh right, TACO.

Redshirt

NOW THE LIMP-WRISTED SON OF A BITCH DECIDES TO START COMMITTING?!

litre_cola

He said at the dinner he would have a deal at the end of the week. Only Starmer called him out on it saying that he said that for Gaza, and the Ukraine before he was elected.

scotchnaut

THESE CANADA CORNER KICKS, I CALL THEM PIERRE POLIVIERE BECAUSE THEY’RE FAR RIGHT AND JUST THE WORST PIECE OF SHIT THAT YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE.

Last edited 10 months ago by scotchnaut
litre_cola

Canadia is being far too polite with each other. You are Jonathan David rip a fucking shot instead of passing!!!

Doktor Zymm

I might have to write a strongly worded letter to “Hammocks Weekly”, or maybe “Hangin’ Out: The Hammock Quarterly”. It shouldn’t be that hard to include all the parts when mailing out a hammock stand!

Mr. Ayo

You would think that would be a necessary core competence for a Hammock venture. Like, what’s the use of hammock if there’s nothing to hold it up? Then it’s just a bit a meshing on the floor.

Doktor Zymm

It’s a sad state of affairs, for sure

litre_cola

Have you contacted the head of the Hammock District Business Association?

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