Your “Oh Gawd! I Can’t Feel My Eyes!” Sunday Afternoon NFL Thread

scotchnaut - October 21, 2018October 21, 2018

255

The football. It burns! But in a good way. There's still more to come. TO THE GAMES! Saints/Ravens: For the seeming twenty-eleventh year in a row, Baltimore has thrown together a magnificent smash-your-teeth-in defense that takes no prisoners. It's the sort of unit that had very little trouble white-washing the Titans last

Your “Pulse is Steady, Will Continue To Monitor Vitals” 2nd Round of NFL Football

scotchnaut - October 21, 2018October 21, 2018

500

It's another one of those slogs but with each other's support, I think we can make our way through this. Shall we keep the ball rolling along its merry way? Sure we will! TO THE GAMES! Bills/Colts: I can recall way back in 2018 when this was Nathan Peterman's team. It didn't

Your “London’s Best On Offer” Sunday Morning NFL Football

scotchnaut - October 21, 2018

213

I hope that them damn west coasters are gonna do their part this, the most holy of football-watching weeks. Those of us occupying the eastern standard time zone have already been up for quite some time. We've been saying our prayers and helping little persons cross dangerous intersections all the

Your “I Didn’t Say ‘Dude!’ I Said ‘Dud'” Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 18, 2018October 18, 2018

516

It was a fairly good run, wasn't it? "The Curse of Thursday Night Football" that had descended last year had lost its way for most of 2018. Well, it's back and it's taking no prisoners tonight. So shutter your windows, bar the doors and maybe explore other entertainment options. There's

Your “I’ll Be Honest-I’m Hoping For a Travesty Here” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 14, 2018October 14, 2018

493

You know, the good kind of travesty whereby extraordinary misfortune befalls the easily-hateable team that has experienced so much success. The one that has had the benefit of iffy ref calls for more than a decade now. The team that has an owner that has more than doubled his significant

Your Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 14, 2018October 14, 2018

209

Boy, did we ever laugh some laughs back there! Nevertheless, it's onwards and sidewayswards for us grizzled veterans of the commenting game. There's always so much more work to do when you're employed in the Merriment Division of the innanet. TO THE GAMES! LAR/DEN: Cooks and Kupp are ready to fly around

Your “London’s Calling!” (at regular EST, smh) Sunday NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 14, 2018

790

No morning game? Goddammit! Sure it made our collective eyes bleed, watching so much football in one day but it was the good kind of blood-letting. I think game-time has been shifted because the sponsors were whining about not getting enough bang for their ad bucks. Who is to blame

Your “Stare Into The Abyss That Is The NFC East” Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 11, 2018

594

God is dead. So why not watch a bit of the old football? It's not like I'm going to judge you. -Friedrich "The Funky Philologist" Nietzsche These two wet, stinking dogs are gonna give us many reasons to laugh and joke and cry (that'd be me, mostly). TO THE GAME! Schmeagles/Jizzants: Both these squadoos

Your “It Might Be Me, It’s Probably You” Monday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 8, 2018October 8, 2018

292

[sniffs the air] It was definitely you. Week 5 Fallout: -Marquez Valdes-Scantling scored his very first NFL TD and a new fantasy god was born. (not you, Marquez) -Keke Coutee also scored his very first TD, prompting older white guys to reference "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" for no reason that any other demographic can

Your “Let’s Keep This Bus Rolling” mid-Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 7, 2018October 7, 2018

227

If the tilts keep coming I'll keep doing the intros. TO THE GAMES! Oak/LAC: The things you learn when you do a bit of homework: rook safety Derwin James is by far the top-rated first year player that plays in the secondary, according to PFF. That rating system also places him 4th

Your “There Is Only One Game Today” Sunday Morning/Early Afternoon Multi-Purpose Post

scotchnaut - October 7, 2018

745

Much like any Giants fan I'll be obligated to watch their eventual embarrassing demise vs. Carolina. But like many folks that like football in and of itself, the Jags/Chiefs game is must-eyeball TV. Also, we've got some pre-NFL appetizers on in the form of EPL action. TO THE GAMES! Den/NYJ: This is

Your “We Are All Jack Doyle” Thursday Night Football Open Thread

scotchnaut - October 4, 2018October 4, 2018

340

The Adventures of Jack Doyle, Private Detective, 1951. Written and directed by Orson Welles /Doyle's office Voice of Jack Doyle: It was a Thursday just like all the other ones. I was washing my balls when there was a knock at the door. Doyle: "Come in, Jones and hand me that towel, would ya." Dame: