Ten mother-lovin’ games? Better get to work…
Car @ Hou: The Hoyer Era lasted a wee bit shorter than the length of one football game. Congrats coaching staff, no matter who you play at QB going forward you’ll have to answer a boatload of questions about the guy you didn’t start. Kuechly’ (no matter how you spell it, it looks wrong) is out today but the Panther D shouldn’t have much of a problem against the Texans. Where’s Greg Olsen? Nowhere to be found last week. He had only two targets.
SF @ Pit: Hyde went bananas last week and Bush is out (surprise!) so look for more of the same. If Kap spies a gap he should be off and running-the Steelers secondary is iffy. TE Davis may be able to take advantage of the same situation. Brown has a minimum 5 catches and 50 yards for an NFL record 33 consecutive games-the second longest active streak is 4. I thought Wheaton would take advantage of Bryant not being around. That has not been the case.
TB @ NO: Both teams are 0-1 but this division battle will have no ramifications in the future. Winston looked overwhelmed last week just as he did in the preseason. Evans should be ready to go-adjust your lineups accordingly. How ’bout that disconnect between lousy QB play and points expected to be garnered by a quality WR in fantasy? Brees threw 48 times last week. The Wolf Man bulldozed the Saints to 31st in the league in total defense last year. I wonder what he’s got up his sleeve this time around. Colston has had a great run but it looks as though his knees have gone the way of the fax machine.
Det @ Min: As we learned last week, Stafford has been in the league X number of years and still gets rattled by blitz packages. The Lions D is goig to fall from a top 5 unit to somewhere in the middle of the pack.As yeah right said, “give AP the damn ball!” That should solve a number of problems for the offence in general and Bridgewater in particular. Maybe the coaching staff had him on a “carry count”? Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense.
Ari @ Chi: Ellington is out so Johnson (Chris) and Johnson (David) will clean up the running game. I think Andre will come back to a muddled RBBC situation. Palmer picked up where he left off last season. A Warner-like renaissance for him? I’d like to see it. It’s imperative that Allen get pressure on Palmer early. Jeffrey’s hamstring is acting up-if he’s out Patrick Peterson is going to take the next WR out of the game so that leaves Bennett at TE as the only viable threat in the passing game. I don’t like the Bears chances.
NE @ Buff: Rex said that everyone wants them to beat the Pats and he is right. Gronk has scored 9 TD’s in 7 games against the Bills but is generally limited against Ryan defenses. McCoy is questionable so we may see a whole lot of Boobie. Buffalo looked amazing last week and in the preseason as well. Brady doesn’t do well against pressure and this Bills D can deliver on that front.
SD @ CIN: The Chargers D held Megatron to 2 catches-can they do the same to Green? Allen, Green, Floyd, Gordon, Woodhead, Oliver and Gates later on-Rivers has a ton of toys to play with this year. Cincy has no injured players! It doesn’t matter. It is very important for Hill to chew up the clock so that Rivers doesn’t get on the field.
Ten @ Cle: The huge story this week is that Terrance West returns to Cleveland to wreak mediocrity and take a seat on the bench. Mariota, huh? What happened last week? McCown is out and Bowe is questionable, which in this business is known as addition by subtraction.
Atl @ NYG: Ryan shouldn’t have any problems unless he’s terrified by invisible pass rushes. Tevin Coleman looks to be the guy in the Falcons backfield. Say a prayer for the Giants secondary-Julio Jones is in town. Vic Beasley against Ereck Flowers-who ya got? There is a 50-50 chance that the Giants could be 0-3 five days from now. (they meet Wash. on Thursday)
StL @ Was: St. Lou ambushed Seattle last week and should take their opponent out behind the woodshed this week. My buddy Cunningham didn’t embarrass himself last week. The jury is still out on Foles though he didn’t throw a pic last week. Rashad Ross scored 4 TD’s in preseason and is looking for his first in real play. He replaces D-Jax this week.
Redeem yo self Matt Ryan
Batman question; now that it is fall, do Poison Ivy’s leaves fall off?
I hope so.
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JULIODOWN
GiantsDERP status: COMPLETE
HOOLIO HONES!!!!!
“BOOOOO”
-The five Titans fans that aren’t MADDEN computer sprites.
The angering part of this game is that after much going back and forth I picked the Giants to win and cover in our pool.
Johnny Football did a good?
FLOATDOWN 2: LASERFACE BOOGALOO
Landon Collins forgets to touch Hankerson when he falls down. BAMA NOWLEDGE RULES!
So Manziel is now a good QB…but only at home…and playing the Titans…and the Titans have food poisoning.
He’s wrecking this league!
I think that’s called doing a Springboks
Sweet coverage, Giants
Bears wisely using the screen to avoid the safety. Down by 19. With 8 mins left. At home.
Is Matt Ryan deliberately trying to get Julio Jones killed?
Yes, the evidence supports that conclusion.
Nobody is better than Matt Ryan at 4th Quarter comebacks? I thought Romo and Peyton both had more?
More isn’t Better.
#MacrobrewPride
I’m pretty sure it ain’t very hard to befuddle Nick Foles on a daily basis.
If you turn out the lights, he becomes convinced he’s gone blind.
Phew [*Redacted] s…..
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Father Time must owe Tom Coughlin money.
Fucking Nazis.
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Goddammit Falcons
New Jersey? MOAR LIKE BOOOO JERSEY, AMIRITE?!?!?!?!1!
Antonio Brown: Not Mike Wallace.
Yes, Brown has hands.
and can run routes
Lovie approves of the Giants’ clock management.
I like to think Tom Coughlin lives his life in a continual state of exasperation, no matter what the situation.
“A 1964 Cobra for my birthday? Aw geez, the gas mileage is terrible!”
“They’re doing prime rib for the early bird special? Aw geez, my dentures can’t handle that!”
“A Matlock marathon? Aw geez, I’ve got film-study until 3:30 am!”
The Maras pay some youths to stand on Coughlin’s lawn so he has a source of anger to take out on players
Coughlinface with some braised Manningface and a side of poor clock management? I’ll take three, please.
Don’t worry, there’ll be plenty more bad clock management. I forsee the Giants having too many men on the field with the clock running, and calling a timeout.
Is it just me or is the site running a bit slow today?
http://33.media.tumblr.com/c4d77c89540827a1b59eb456dfcc0ec6/tumblr_n9hfu2qSMa1qztdsmo1_1280.gif
It’s just me isn’t it?
She is for me as well.
I barely notice the ~30 seconds of refresh to a single comment.
Giants clock management is a fucking embarrassment.
ALL THE ANTONIO BROWN PLAYS
/checks clock
//drums fingers
Yeah fuck it. You talked me into it.
///cracks open beer.
Let’s do this damn thing!
I’ve been high since Cutler was healthy!
I mean, his leg. Not the smallpox hiding out in his colon.
WOW. Shit call and the Saints and our Survivor pools have faint breath.
I don’t know about you, but I picked the Stillers.
A few people picked SF in the “Loser” pool (as I picked the Jets), but nobody picked PIT to win.
Yeah that could hurt some folks.
And I took the Ratbirds over Oakland.
The top of Beckham’s ‘do belongs on the helmet of a 19 century Russian aristocrat.
Oh, the big bad pass interference stole your interception? Here, let me offer you another on the very next play.
– Matt Stafford
If you could pay me in chicken wings that would great.
-Stafford
I appreciate that yogurt keeps you regular, but Cam Newton needs to trim his fingernails.
Hey DFO, did you know Sammy Watkins is a good WR? I don’t Rex knows, I’m pretty sure he forgets his name on a daily basis.
Rex Ryan doesn’t believe in this “offense” you speak of.
Rex picked a starting QB by drawing names out of a hat, I doubt he knows the name of anyone on offence other than Richie Incognito
Stop showing the Houston-Carolina game. Nobody cares.
Why are they showing a football an Oilers/Panthers game from 1996?
Where’s my beautiful edit button? I mangled that sentence more than JPP mangled his hand.
Did. . . Did Harris just run out of bounds when he saw the Falcons’ punter? That’s an automatic cut, right?
Goddamnit Chargers. Where’s the help, Weddle? Pagano is a dumb sack of crap, thinking our undersized CBs can handle big TEs or AJ Green 1-on-1. What a platter of shitburgers.
Just a reminder that the Stillers secondary is still ass.
So apparently Cam Newton’s being controlled by RFD.
So, with WAS and TB winning, my Survivor pool is over if BAL beats OAK this afternoon (one dude picked that).
Looks like the factory may be working overtime to exceed the quota.
I dunno, if I’m Matt Ryan I maybe try NOT to get Julio Jones killed over the middle.
Mariota seemed to be trying his best to give the ball to the Browns any way he could, but accidentally threw a touchdown on 4th down
So what the shit is wrong with Brees? Is he just entering his late Favre years?
No Jimmy Graham to bail him out? Can’t be.
I heard Graham played basketball.
Sadness is in demand, boys! Up the production!
CLEVELAND FUMBLE RESULTS IN POOP-N-SCOOP?
Apologies for dog pound joke.
Tyler Eifert. The only player to come out of ND in the last 20 years to not be a sack of shit.
Go home Rams, you’re bad.
Typical. Their superbowl is playing Seattle.
It’s the closest they’ll get. Until the Super Bowl is in LA and they can just buy a ticket in town.
BUZZSAW SUPA BOLE BOUND
Starting Cards D in FF. Went from like a 29% chance of winning with Cutler in to 40% with Clausen on the field.
PK demands to know why yahoo would besmirch such a hard-working, plucky, and all-around good guy from Notre Dame like Jimmy Clausen.