AFC South Fever-Catch It! Your Thursday Nighter Open Thread

Indy @ Hou: Arian is coming back to full strength against the right team-versus the Colts he averages a TD per game, 120 rush yards and 6 ypc. Is there anyone who can’t  run against Indy? I don’t think so. Here’s betting that Mallethoyer has the sort of game that will have the Texan fan screaming for Hoyermallet to start the following week. As of this writing (Wednesday) both Luck and Hasselbeck were questionable which led to the re-signing of Josh Johnson. Needless to say, one of the questionables will be dragging his carcass onto the field Thursday evening. You know how teams end up regretting not re-upping a star player because he ended up on a division rival and went on to show that he could still be productive?-Texans management doesn’t feel that way about Andre Johnson. At the rate he’s going, Donte Moncrief (no relation to Sidney Moncrief, the do-everything 6’4″ guard for the Milwaukee Bucks in the 80’s that was asked to guard everyone from Jordan to Dr. J to Larry Bird and never got the credit he deserved and was my childhood hero, dammit!) is going to be the guy that ends up getting double coverage, leaving T.Y. to wonder, “hey, what about me?”.

 

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All hail Pat McAfee, Destroyer of World, the Punter Imperator.
http://mountaineers.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/patBOOM.gif

Old School Zero

WITNESS

makeitsnowondem

chrome as fuck

makeitsnowondem

I bet if you gave me the pill from Limitless I could find a way to make a spinoff series that’s not another fucking police procedural.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Hero!

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Whatever happened to the t-mobile girl?

entropy

She is currently playing a dead superhero on Playstation network’s adaptation of the “Powers” comic book. Or she was, last I checked on that show’s progress.

Lord Joe Don Looney

Other Space – She is on a yahoo tv show – has a mstie connection.

entropy

That’s the AT&T girl.

Spur

Can we call Clowney a good pass rusher when has precisely 0 sacks in his career?

entropy

Jesus fuck Pheeeel yeah, someone else was there to help with Watt, but he never touched him! Watt was blocked by one guy. Get his dick out of your mouth and watch the same game we are you dumb fuck.

makeitsnowondem

THIS JJ WATT, I CALL HIM BARACK OBAMA BECAUSE HE’S TRYING TO TRAMPLE OUR REITZ

Old School Zero

“He’ll never take THESE guns away!”

/flexes

/wins election to Speaker of the House

/is elected president

Downfield Matriculator

Crashes Air Force One
/Loses job to Madam Secretary

jjfozz

Things I want once I’m a billionaire:

1. Fresh sheets every night when me and the rest of the sorority get into our bed.
2. Bourbon IV drip.
3. Lion and tiger cubs hanging out around the house.

Moonbatting Average

4. Buy the St Louis Cardinals and move them to Albuquerque

nomonkeyfun

No. 3 Makes it much easier when someone in No. 1 gets in “trouble”.

Sill Bimmons

Dude, that’s 10 figure shit.

You gotta think llama jousting and live human electroplating.

JustStopDude

I lived in this hotel for 9 months while working an utter shit job in the UAE.

http://www.jebiga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/The_YAS_Viceroy_Hotel_Abu_Dhabi_8.jpg

That’s a formula 1 race track going through the middle of it.

Holy shit I felt rich. Miserable and rich.

Downfield Matriculator

Don’t forget the tiny giraffes

Old School Zero

“I ate those burned limes! You know I own it, you know I own it… ’cause yurts are good pearls!” — Emmit Smiff at karaoke

Sill Bimmons

You’re just fucking awful.

Never change.

Old School Zero

I swear that’s what somebody wrote in my high school yearbook, word for word.

Sill Bimmons

I guess so.

You couldn’t possibly be the kind of twisted cretin that thought something like that up.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Can someone post a picture of Robin Thicke’s ex wife? She’s really hot

jjfozz

This game has not a lot of JJ Watt, and I feel fine about it

entropy

Probably the best thing about the game, but we’re still gone get this: “JJ Watt was a non-factor, but here’s ten minutes of previous game highlights anyway!”

nomonkeyfun

And he lives in a log cabin just like that President we still can’t mention in Texas.

No not that one. That other damnyankee who was shot for helping them colored folks.

Spur

Is Houston really this bad? Serious question. On paper they seem much better than their performance indicates. Is really all about not having a serviceable QB or the coaching staff?

I say it’s the coaching staff.

Sill Bimmons

QB position.

King Hippo

After the whole Falcons thing, pretty clear it’s a complete shitshow. The details are beyond my feeble brainpower.

Moonbatting Average

Why not both?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Guess I should have watched Hard Knocks

Col. Duke LaCross

The coaching staff is nothing but garbage guyina. Nothing but garbage.

Sharkbait

HOW THE FUCK YA DOIN BOYS?

Gotta love remoting into work for maintenance. At least I have booze and nobody can judge me.

Old School Zero

We’re just chillin’ here in Hoyer Country.

Sill Bimmons

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m not overly fond of your avatar, particularly in light of certain developments.

JustStopDude

I know your pain.

I’m expected to work the usual working hours for the states but my managers and whatnot are based in Japan. Nothing like fielding emails and phone calls through the night…every fucking night…

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Thursday night football, a Stanford reunion

jjfozz

I wish the entire SEC would fall into a volcano filled with red hot tapioca pudding

ballsofsteelandfury

Impossible. They would have already eaten it.

King Hippo

They want to know if the volcano respects the traditional definition of marriage.

Sill Bimmons

OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH GAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWD THHHHHEEEEE LAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWVVVVVVVAAAAAA IIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTT HUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRTTTZZZZZ PAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLL

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

But it’s sort of entertaining football, also the coaches are hilarious

Wakezilla

/flips over to Oilers/Blues game.

Damnit McDavid, don’t you screw me over. You too, Jaden Schwartz.

jjfozz

Fourscore and seven years ago, I got married. And shit, it seems like even longer.

Sill Bimmons

Hang on, bro.

Only Fourscore and seven years left to go.

entropy

This game is depressing me. There’s no specific reason, it’s just kinda sad. Like watching two quadriplegic dogs roll around after a piece of cheese.

Spur

No one told the Texans defense that the second half started.

Downfield Matriculator

I have the sound off in order to preserve my sanity (and hide from the family).

Did anyone say remember to say “This is Hoyer Country”

Sill Bimmons

Many, many times.

Downfield Matriculator

So sorry — you and I will just patiently await the return of the Ben to the Steelers.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

I started hosutons defense in fantasy, I am not ready for draft kings or fan duel

litre_cola

Oh but you are just the client they are looking for!

Use code IHAVETOOMUCHMONEYFORMYOWNGOODTRUMP2016

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Haha was betting against a shitty 40 year old qb, also is there a sanders promo code?

Sill Bimmons

It should surprise no one that the Ice Stillers are down 2-0 to the Ice Cowboys.

All the sudden everything is really fucking weird.

Spur

Evening Guys. I see the Texans still has no QB and Foster is hurt again.

Wakezilla

More like Grit Whalen!

Those yards gained were full of truculence and pugnacity.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Oh for fucks sake phil and Jim, if mallet wasn’t white you’d be trashing him for running off early
// mallet didn’t do anything wrong but their coverage of it is bs

blaxabbath

I think the Bears should pay that vikings mascot guy to come to their games. That would be some premo in-division spite. Also, it fulfills the corporatism that is the NFL.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

RAGNAR LOYAL. RAGNAR NO SETTLE FOR DIRTY BEAR MONEY. CEPT MAYBE IN SAN FRANCISCO.

ballsofsteelandfury

I see what you did there.

Well done

litre_cola

I love that Marlins guy is at the KC game tonight. Rich, single, zero fucks given.

I thought I say him at the Yanks-Astros game as well.

But who in their right mind roots for the Marlins.

litre_cola

I read his story. Single dude, rich, goes to whatever ball game he wants. Gets in shit from security last year, offered all sorts of stuff, flatly says no, and he is from Miami.

Senor Weaselo

Yeah, I saw him there too.

JustStopDude

Since FIFA is more difficult to find highlights from their games than the NFL…here is a gif I found for the scoring shot in the Ireland-Germany match.

http://i.imgur.com/kjyJQxL.gif

Sill Bimmons

Only degrees of losing in that meeting of delightful whites.

JustStopDude

Northern Ireland won as well 3-1 against Greece so literally there is not a person on that Island right now that isn’t utterly and completely shitfaced for the next 3 days.

We may see a situation where they actually run out of alcohol.

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Wales is going to be fun team to root for next summer

blaxabbath

Just wanted to check in and let you know I am playing against Mallet in FF this week (2nd QB in crazy DFO league) and that he has 0 points as of halftime. I’m not watching the game so….I hope this keeps up. I’m not a greedy man. I don’t ask for negative points. Just Texans gonna Tex..ans.

JustStopDude

NO! NO WE don’t HAVE a game. We have a fluke play because the Colt’s defense decided to fucking go insane on a single play.

entropy

If the game ended right now, these assholes would all be saying, “this game was nowhere near as close as the 13-10 score would have you believe.”

Wakezilla

I mean, they aren’t very good to begin with. More like they’re starting to act like themselves

Sill Bimmons

One Second Of Incompetence

One Second of Incompetence: A Saga of the Bane of Premature Ejaculation.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace
Lord Joe Don Looney

Dear Colts,
Please lets us know how New England cheated on that play and allowed Houston to score.
Signed,
Battleship Manning

blaxabbath

Hey now!

Fuck NE.

nomonkeyfun

What do you have to do in that situation?

Knock the ball down.
C’Mon Man!!!

JerryJones-Thugs-N-Harmony

Mallet just run to Dallas,you have to be better than doozy pantz

Wakezilla

Hey now, Doopy Pantz was perfectly cromulent last week

Stabby Pants

Raheem Moore thinks that was shit coverage.

JustStopDude
Sill Bimmons

WE WANT BARABBAS

Wakezilla

Jaelen with a STRONG catch.

Sill Bimmons

STORNG

evilbeaver8

Seriously, the Colts have to be the dumbest team on earth.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Wow. Indy’s secondary should be ashamed…

Senor Weaselo

STRONG STRONG.

Mother Puncher

#28 ran a pick on his own teammates.

King Hippo

YUP. Took out 2, at least. 3, if you count himself.

Bill O’Brien (smugly): totally planned that guys.

bourb0nblues

FAT HUMP DERPPPPPP

Old School Zero
entropy

Wow. There is no world in which I would have bet on that occurring.

Sill Bimmons

hoyer shit

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