Indy @ Hou: Arian is coming back to full strength against the right team-versus the Colts he averages a TD per game, 120 rush yards and 6 ypc. Is there anyone who can’t run against Indy? I don’t think so. Here’s betting that Mallethoyer has the sort of game that will have the Texan fan screaming for Hoyermallet to start the following week. As of this writing (Wednesday) both Luck and Hasselbeck were questionable which led to the re-signing of Josh Johnson. Needless to say, one of the questionables will be dragging his carcass onto the field Thursday evening. You know how teams end up regretting not re-upping a star player because he ended up on a division rival and went on to show that he could still be productive?-Texans management doesn’t feel that way about Andre Johnson. At the rate he’s going, Donte Moncrief (no relation to Sidney Moncrief, the do-everything 6’4″ guard for the Milwaukee Bucks in the 80’s that was asked to guard everyone from Jordan to Dr. J to Larry Bird and never got the credit he deserved and was my childhood hero, dammit!) is going to be the guy that ends up getting double coverage, leaving T.Y. to wonder, “hey, what about me?”.
All hail Pat McAfee, Destroyer of World, the Punter Imperator.
http://mountaineers.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/patBOOM.gif
WITNESS
chrome as fuck
I bet if you gave me the pill from Limitless I could find a way to make a spinoff series that’s not another fucking police procedural.
Just want everyone to know that I prevented breast cancer from happening by watching this game. Ladies, you’re welcome.
Hero!
Whatever happened to the t-mobile girl?
She is currently playing a dead superhero on Playstation network’s adaptation of the “Powers” comic book. Or she was, last I checked on that show’s progress.
Other Space – She is on a yahoo tv show – has a mstie connection.
That’s the AT&T girl.
Can we call Clowney a good pass rusher when has precisely 0 sacks in his career?
Jesus fuck Pheeeel yeah, someone else was there to help with Watt, but he never touched him! Watt was blocked by one guy. Get his dick out of your mouth and watch the same game we are you dumb fuck.
THIS JJ WATT, I CALL HIM BARACK OBAMA BECAUSE HE’S TRYING TO TRAMPLE OUR REITZ
“He’ll never take THESE guns away!”
/flexes
/wins election to Speaker of the House
/is elected president
Crashes Air Force One
/Loses job to Madam Secretary
http://31.media.tumblr.com/339f92d80d51f427daac4a7cf46ab480/tumblr_nu7yzdGm201upaq0so1_250.gif
Things I want once I’m a billionaire:
1. Fresh sheets every night when me and the rest of the sorority get into our bed.
2. Bourbon IV drip.
3. Lion and tiger cubs hanging out around the house.
4. Buy the St Louis Cardinals and move them to Albuquerque
No. 3 Makes it much easier when someone in No. 1 gets in “trouble”.
Dude, that’s 10 figure shit.
You gotta think llama jousting and live human electroplating.
I lived in this hotel for 9 months while working an utter shit job in the UAE.
http://www.jebiga.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/The_YAS_Viceroy_Hotel_Abu_Dhabi_8.jpg
That’s a formula 1 race track going through the middle of it.
Holy shit I felt rich. Miserable and rich.
Don’t forget the tiny giraffes
“I ate those burned limes! You know I own it, you know I own it… ’cause yurts are good pearls!” — Emmit Smiff at karaoke
You’re just fucking awful.
Never change.
I swear that’s what somebody wrote in my high school yearbook, word for word.
I guess so.
You couldn’t possibly be the kind of twisted cretin that thought something like that up.
Can someone post a picture of Robin Thicke’s ex wife? She’s really hot
This game has not a lot of JJ Watt, and I feel fine about it
Probably the best thing about the game, but we’re still gone get this: “JJ Watt was a non-factor, but here’s ten minutes of previous game highlights anyway!”
And he lives in a log cabin just like that President we still can’t mention in Texas.
No not that one. That other damnyankee who was shot for helping them colored folks.
Is Houston really this bad? Serious question. On paper they seem much better than their performance indicates. Is really all about not having a serviceable QB or the coaching staff?
I say it’s the coaching staff.
QB position.
After the whole Falcons thing, pretty clear it’s a complete shitshow. The details are beyond my feeble brainpower.
Why not both?
Guess I should have watched Hard Knocks
The coaching staff is nothing but garbage guyina. Nothing but garbage.
HOW THE FUCK YA DOIN BOYS?
Gotta love remoting into work for maintenance. At least I have booze and nobody can judge me.
We’re just chillin’ here in Hoyer Country.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m not overly fond of your avatar, particularly in light of certain developments.
I know your pain.
I’m expected to work the usual working hours for the states but my managers and whatnot are based in Japan. Nothing like fielding emails and phone calls through the night…every fucking night…
Thursday night football, a Stanford reunion
I wish the entire SEC would fall into a volcano filled with red hot tapioca pudding
Impossible. They would have already eaten it.
They want to know if the volcano respects the traditional definition of marriage.
OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH GAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWD THHHHHEEEEE LAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWVVVVVVVAAAAAA IIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTT HUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRTTTZZZZZ PAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLL
But it’s sort of entertaining football, also the coaches are hilarious
Houston Redundants losing.
/flips over to Oilers/Blues game.
Damnit McDavid, don’t you screw me over. You too, Jaden Schwartz.
Fourscore and seven years ago, I got married. And shit, it seems like even longer.
Hang on, bro.
Only Fourscore and seven years left to go.
This game is depressing me. There’s no specific reason, it’s just kinda sad. Like watching two quadriplegic dogs roll around after a piece of cheese.
No one told the Texans defense that the second half started.
I have the sound off in order to preserve my sanity (and hide from the family).
Did anyone say remember to say “This is Hoyer Country”
Many, many times.
So sorry — you and I will just patiently await the return of the Ben to the Steelers.
I started hosutons defense in fantasy, I am not ready for draft kings or fan duel
Oh but you are just the client they are looking for!
Use code IHAVETOOMUCHMONEYFORMYOWNGOODTRUMP2016
Haha was betting against a shitty 40 year old qb, also is there a sanders promo code?
It should surprise no one that the Ice Stillers are down 2-0 to the Ice Cowboys.
All the sudden everything is really fucking weird.
Evening Guys. I see the Texans still has no QB and Foster is hurt again.
Tracy Wolfson has big ears and should therefore never reproduce.
More like Grit Whalen!
Those yards gained were full of truculence and pugnacity.
Oh for fucks sake phil and Jim, if mallet wasn’t white you’d be trashing him for running off early
// mallet didn’t do anything wrong but their coverage of it is bs
I think the Bears should pay that vikings mascot guy to come to their games. That would be some premo in-division spite. Also, it fulfills the corporatism that is the NFL.
RAGNAR LOYAL. RAGNAR NO SETTLE FOR DIRTY BEAR MONEY. CEPT MAYBE IN SAN FRANCISCO.
I see what you did there.
Well done
I love that Marlins guy is at the KC game tonight. Rich, single, zero fucks given.
I thought I say him at the Yanks-Astros game as well.
But who in their right mind roots for the Marlins.
I read his story. Single dude, rich, goes to whatever ball game he wants. Gets in shit from security last year, offered all sorts of stuff, flatly says no, and he is from Miami.
Yeah, I saw him there too.
Since FIFA is more difficult to find highlights from their games than the NFL…here is a gif I found for the scoring shot in the Ireland-Germany match.
http://i.imgur.com/kjyJQxL.gif
Only degrees of losing in that meeting of delightful whites.
Northern Ireland won as well 3-1 against Greece so literally there is not a person on that Island right now that isn’t utterly and completely shitfaced for the next 3 days.
We may see a situation where they actually run out of alcohol.
Wales is going to be fun team to root for next summer
Hey Moose:
http://gfycat.com/SilentAnguishedHorsemouse
http://thumbs.gfycat.com/SilentAnguishedHorsemouse-poster.jpg
Just wanted to check in and let you know I am playing against Mallet in FF this week (2nd QB in crazy DFO league) and that he has 0 points as of halftime. I’m not watching the game so….I hope this keeps up. I’m not a greedy man. I don’t ask for negative points. Just Texans gonna Tex..ans.
NO! NO WE don’t HAVE a game. We have a fluke play because the Colt’s defense decided to fucking go insane on a single play.
If the game ended right now, these assholes would all be saying, “this game was nowhere near as close as the 13-10 score would have you believe.”
I mean, they aren’t very good to begin with. More like they’re starting to act like themselves
One Second Of Incompetence
One Second of Incompetence: A Saga of the Bane of Premature Ejaculation.
There’s the Colts defense I know and loathe.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/179fde8833681804a7879f1741127432/tumblr_mjguce6u4R1ro8ysbo1_400.gif
Dear Colts,
Please lets us know how New England cheated on that play and allowed Houston to score.
Signed,
Battleship Manning
Hey now!
Fuck NE.
What do you have to do in that situation?
Knock the ball down.
C’Mon Man!!!
Mallet just run to Dallas,you have to be better than doozy pantz
Hey now, Doopy Pantz was perfectly cromulent last week
Raheem Moore thinks that was shit coverage.
That coverage…
http://michaelgmunz.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/thats-a-paddlin-30027.jpg
WE WANT BARABBAS
Jaelen with a STRONG catch.
STORNG
Seriously, the Colts have to be the dumbest team on earth.
Wow. Indy’s secondary should be ashamed…
STRONG STRONG.
#28 ran a pick on his own teammates.
YUP. Took out 2, at least. 3, if you count himself.
Bill O’Brien (smugly): totally planned that guys.
FAT HUMP DERPPPPPP
http://i.imgur.com/wjyCRTw.gif
Wow. There is no world in which I would have bet on that occurring.
hoyer shit