![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
What’s on your mind? Me? Jackson Browne’s “Running On Empty” has been on my brain for the last two weeks. I sure as hell am not going to tell you that it’s the song of all songs-it’s just there. Every day. It is god damn relentless. If someone could distract me while I attempt to watch an entire Blue Jays game for the first time in 25 years, that would be great. Seriously, what are you up to?
Your Very First Monday Afternoon Open Thread
Subscribe
Please login to comment
846 Comments
THE ALL NEW TACOMA, FAVORITE TRUCK OF ISIS AND OTHER TERRORIST GROUPS AROUN—– Jerry, shut the fuck up we don’t put that in the commercials!
I dunno, if a truck can stand up to what one of those assholes puts it through it’ll probably be just the truck I need for my weekly runs to the landfill.
http://syriancivilwar.panzerfaustnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/syrian-technical.jpg
Say what you will…its one of the most effective offensive vehicles in military history.
Its calle’d a Hilux in Arbia,,, ppl forget hat
Sandy Bollocks is still pretty hot.
True, but I’m still avoiding her movies.
I like older women. I will never understand why someone would want to date like a teenager when they are in their 30’s.
Give me a gal that knows exactly what she likes and wants…
We haven’t had a holding/intentional grounding in the end zone for a safety yet this year, have we?
Don’t throw you hands up with the “I didn’t do anything” motion. That NEVER WORKS!
From the upcoming Marc Trestman “Playgrounds For Dummies”
ALL HAIL THE FLAG, FOR HE HAS BEEN THROWN.
HAIL BLEERGH
That is really an ungodly amount of pink.
All the flags thrown…you don’t call THAT?!?!
Hey, a play without a flag
I want to get off Gruden’s wild ride.
Serious question, has anyone actually seen a good game this year? If so, which one?
actually, last night was surprisingly good
Jags/Bucs yesterday? HA! Who am I kidding, no one got to watch that.
It’s all that gay marriage ,, smgdh ,, THANKS OBAMA
Random pan flute plug by Tirico, he’s clearly lost his mind being next to Gruden all these years.
I would pay literally hundreds of cents to see a Gruden/Tirico Pan flute duo.
THANK YOU PAN FLUTIST FOR THAT MAGICAL INTERLUDE WHAT IN TEH FUCK AM I WATCHING
Zamphir, Master of the Pan Flute reference. Drink!
I keep flipping to baseball. I was told there would be a fight and no Joe Buck at this Mets and Dodgers game. So far no Buck but no fighting.
The Dodgers benched Utley.
I would love it if in a situation in which there were two penalties against one team, the other team could get the combined total of the yards for both penalties, if a randomly chosen player on the team could do the math in their head without using fingers or toes.
Failure to get the correct answer results in picking up both flags.
I think if someone on the offending team catches the flag before it hits the ground, no penalty.
Change that to “penalty yardage reversed” and you have something there.
We should clearly be on the NFL’s rules committee.
At some point during this season, a team will end up with negative offensive yardage due to the FLAG GODS. It sort of has to happen at this point.
C-Hox –7 yards Nov. 4, 1979
I need a couple of throws to Gates to beat VMB.
I need divine intervention to win any sort of game in Sill’s 20 team league.
Matt Asiata is not a reliable RB in a 20 team league you guys.
Matt Asiata? You drafted him as a joke, right? Right?
It’s a 20 team league. I left him in this week, his bye week, because he was a better alternative than anything that was left.
REMEMBER OCTOBER IS SWEATER WEATHER
That’s gonna leave a stain on the vanity.
Eric Weedle looks like he’s begging the ATF to besiege his cabin in the woods.
Boss Todd is heading to Mexico at halftime
THOSE MEXICALA LADIES GET ALL KINDS OF WET WHEN THEY SEE THE CAMARO
MOAR LIKE BLOW LINE AMIRITE
Fun fact, that kids’ football team is made up entirely of Rivers’s children.
MOAR LE’VEON
Need 3 yards…throw for 40…
Makes sense…
I thought they fired NORV.
Better than the opposite, although I have to wonder if anyone understand distance properly in the NFL.
Rampant head injuries leading to questionable decision making and poor depth perception?
That’s smart. Keeps the defense guessing.
Anyone else laugh about the time gruden brought a shovel into the booth from time to time?
I don’t want to encourage him
I bet Tirico wakes up every Monday, sighs deeply, and then just inhales Xanax until he stops caring.
FLOOOOAAAAATTTTTT
LEARN TO FUCKING TACKLE!!!
So, flags for the flag god again?
It’s a monster new religion sweeping the nation.
Excuse me. Do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior, The Yellow Flag?
Believers are encouraged to drink to excess, correct?
“HE ASKS FOR NOTHING SAVE BACKWARD YARDAGE, AND YOUR ETERNAL SOUL!!!!”
HAIL BLEERGH
Rizzo showing how you use a glove there!
Seriously, there was no need for her to get pregnant in Grease.
Didn’t she miscarry at the end? I seem to recall that was how they happy-ending that issue.
Eat 24, cause you haven’t heard of seamless
I can’t watch the new Muppets; it feels like I’d be aborting my childhood.
So this new, edgy “slightly more adult” Muppets is just Meet the Feebles with all the fun removed, right?
I actually sort of like it.
Finally watched the last Office episode and it sucked
Is that show still on the air?
Number 29, spelled d-u-m-b-a-s-s
I’m beginning to think that the anti-Tomlinites may have a point.
This team is really poorly coached.
My Steelers favoring buddy is not a fan at all, and actively hopes someone takes him out on the sidelines.
Nat Turner: Toldya
The gnashing of teeth and beating of chests on Baltimore sports talk today was fucking gold.
I was worried for both your sanity and the safety of your home yesterday.
That is the good thing about your home team losing…is hearing the fucking sports radio hot takes.
“Dis is Dave from Dundalk! Dem Ravens ar play’n like shit!”
That guy really demands a flag right there.
He studied at the Diego Costa school of demanding a penalty
That’s one way to ask for a trade
Fuck 3-0 dirt former Raiders.
Jason Verrett: Good at football
downtown ‘toni’ brown
/what possessed me to say that!?
because fuck it
It’s a Lemon party.
Jack Lemmon has an awesome tombstone in Westwood cemetery. Somebody post it because I’m outside right now.
goddammit haley
That guy is a DFO’er alright. Gets home from work and immediately loses pants.
Any of our residence recipe commentists here? I made some lentils last night and today I have been gassy AF. Just got back from the gym and I felt terrible, all bloated and the whatnot.
How do I cut back on this horribleness?
Fart.
Replace all vegetables in your diet with red meat
That green shit gives you cancer.
Gas-X, bro.
“Coors Light…cold filtered to try and hide the awful taste”
I refer to Coors Light as “the beer that NASCAR built,” but strangely find original Coors, the Banquet Beer, quite pleasant.
I fucking love Nati boh so who the fuck am I to judge…
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.