Your Late Afternoon Slate O’ Games Open Thread

NYG @ TB: JPP’s Back! will not be talked about nearly as much as his missing digits. If he can do something/anything to help it would be much appreciated by the league leader in yards allowed. Couple that with being last in the league in sacks and you’ve got a functional alcoholic examining his options. Thanks Steve Spagnuolo. LB Kwon Alexander won his second Defensive Rookie of the Week award under trying circumstances. His nickname is Genghis Kwon. Tampa came out with a win in OT against the Falcons last week despite blowing a 17 point lead. I expect the Giants to blow that sort of lead this week.

Atl @ SF: How do the Falcons come away with a win here? I think it all comes down to “don’t f*ck up”. They’ve given the ball away 12 times in the last four games-that’s got to stop. Things must be bad when as an organization you turn to QB Gabbert to solve your problems. Weird stat: In his last 4 games Kaep did not, repeat, not turn the ball over-no Int’s or fumbles. 30 yr. old RB Thomas joins this rapidly sinking ship. He hasn’t seen any action since being set adrift by the Saints last March. His legs should be fresh and ready to go though, right?

Den @ Ind: If I was a schedule-maker back in the spring I would have paired these two up in a heartbeat. Now it doesn’t look all that great. Peyton has been up and down all year long. His game-day QBR’s have ranged from 25.2 (2 weeks ago vs. Cleveland) to 93.6 (last week vs. Green Bay) Luck is 7th in QBR in the fourth quarter of games and dead last for the first three. I doubt he’ll put things together against the Denver D. Retread Rob Chudzinski who has been with The U (blarf!), Cleveland, the Chargers, Cleveland again, the Chargers again, Carolina, Cleveland again and now the Colts will set things right for the O. You just watch.

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Brick Meathook

Hey everybody! I was up all night at a wonderful celebration and I just woke up now! I turned on the TV and the first thing I saw was a replay of Teddy Bridgewater getting knocked out cold! The rest of today is going to be great!! (not that i have anything against bridgewater and i hope he is ok)

laserguru

That’s that goddamn Greggggg rant I went on about earlier.
That pigeon fucker.

entropy

So. Catching up, I see?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Not quite as fast as Bluto, but the freezer vodka has taken a recent hit to be sure.

entropy

Heh. That’s been my shot of the day thus far. And, unless you’ve seen, I finally demolished the case of goddamn Mich Ultra in my beer fridge.

Today has been interesting, let’s say.

laserguru

Celebration weed!!!!!

Senor Weaselo

So, what’s the O/U for the year we start seeing Christmas ads before the 4th of July, 2030?

entropy

2019.

laserguru

If I’m lucky I’ll be dead by then but my karma tells me I’m out in 2032.

Col. Duke LaCross

Zimmer called out Greggggggggg Williams in his presser about the cheap shot on Bridgewater.

Bortleback

Zimmer looked like he really wanted to throw in some dip and challenge Greggggg to a fistfight

King Hippo

Zimmer is a dude you really don’t wanna fight. Righteous. Incredibly cheap shot.

King Hippo

GOOD FOR YOU, MIKE ZIMMER

Doktor Zymm

Nup. Do I try a place called ‘sports corner’ or walk on to the sloppy seconds of a yinzer bar?

Senor Weaselo

Sports Corner sounds like it could be a mob front. Go there!

Mother Puncher

Nuthin’ but sports here, officer.

Fronkenshteen

What’s a truck?

entropy

I once collected for the mob. They are terrible people. Seriously. Horrible, god-awful, terrible people. STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THAT SHIT.

Bortleback

Matty Ice is yelling timber

Mother Puncher

ColdWarPatriots.org sounds like one of the fake websites from GTA

entropy

OK. I am going outside for a moment, because I believe I am not as drunk as I probably am, and unfamiliat environs will prove that. Be back shortly.

John Difool

Colts special teams are indeed ‘special’

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view4/3140046/retarded-horse-o.gif

JustStopDude

comment image

fleshwound_NPG

oh fat humps

It Begins

King Hippo

hopefully!

King Hippo

BOLDEN!!!!!!

/I was screaming at him to get out of bounds for the FG try before clock ran out.

makeitsnowondem

wooooooooo bolden

Smithchez

LOLTS

laserguru

A couple of quick early game observations: How the fuck is Gregggg Williams not in jail? He’s still got his defenses doing the late-hit, cheap shot bullshit that got him fucking suspended in the first place.

Second observation: My Vikings are tied for first fucking place.
Boy Howdy!!!

Smithchez

“The pass was absolutely perfect. The coverage was even better.” Jesus, Pheeeel, just think for a second before you speak.

His Right Honorable Lord Lordship the Lordly

It was ultimately prefect.

Mother Puncher

A perfect force meets a perfect object.

John Difool

Any pass by Peyton where you have to stop dead in your tracks risking a hamstring injury and then dive 5 yards to the ground behind you is perfect….SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH

Bortleback

So will the Broncos sort their shit out and get to 8-0, or is the unstoppable Pats narrative the one we’ll be seeing for the rest of the season/until they meet the 8-8 Giants in the Superbowl?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

My drunkenness has nothing to do with the quality of play.

entropy

“–entropy.”

King Hippo

Fucking shit, Sanders.

Mother Puncher

I’ve been trying to figure out my GHS for a few days now. I went to high school with Nate Ebner of the Patriots. Can anybody figure out my connection to Hardy?

King Hippo

Go get me a FG, PeyPey

JustStopDude

I hear another new Rambo movie is also coming out.

The kid from the 3rd movie, Hamid, is still alive only by now he is fully radicalized and leading ISIL. Rambo has to go back in country to kill the little boy that once taught him it was okay to be alive…and that Buzkashi is a fun game.

John Difool

So Rocky is training Apollo Creed’s artificially inseminated son who was turkey basted and then birthed in the early 1990’s because Creed was killed in 1984 and 31 years old is a little long in the tooth to start a boxing career.

Romonobyl

That’s taking artistic license to it’s absolute extreme.

No he was killed in Latin America in 87.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Get to the choppah

Spur

Michael B. Jordan is too small to be Apollo Creed’s son.

Doktor Zymm

Leaving the house. Let’s all do a shot to bad ideas! Cheers.

Romonobyl

Stagger safely.

entropy

Really?! Do I Seem like the sort of person one should encourage?

Romonobyl

I wonder if there is an official adult undergarment of the NFL?

Covalent Blonde

If there were, I have no doubt I would have seen a review about it from Balls

entropy

Halftime?! HELLOOOOOOO YOUTUBE CHANNEL!

Romonobyl

I’d prefer cat videos too.

entropy

Nah, I’m starting off with that Passenger “Holocene” cover I can’t seem to get enough of, and then reliving my youth with Peter Gabriel “Secret World Live” videos…

Covalent Blonde

I don’t see any gravy being sloshed around? That can’t be right.

Sill Bimmons

We’ve secretly replaced the 49ers coaching staff with local UPS drivers.

Let’s see if anybody notices!

Mother Puncher

secretly?

Old School Zero

The Niners coaching staff in poo brown is appropriate for how much Jed York and Trent Baalke have shit all over them.

Little do you know that Tomsula does deliveries on a 20-hour/week side gig.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

So we can expect Canada to declare war on us in the near future.

fleshwound_NPG

HODOR

Sill Bimmons

Why is the guy on the right in his pajamas?

King Hippo

Sleepy Gary?

King Hippo

This big fat fucking zero for McManus is killing my soul, too. At least don’t make me need points from the Dallas D and/or have to fade Martellus on MNF.

I wonder how many timeouts Lovie hasn’t used during his careers.

King Hippo

He’s saving up to use them as indulgences.

Sill Bimmons

Numbers don’t go that high.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Lovie challenges this comment. Then calls timeout. Then challenges it again.

JustStopDude

How was that not a penalty on the Broncos Defense. The runner is clearly stopped. The play is whistled dead, and yet they still threw the runner down.

Old School Zero

“Oh yeah? Well, I graduated top of my class from Salisbury Steak!” — Tomsula

ThursdaySkyGoddess

Gabbertdown!

King Hippo

THE FLOW is fantasy relevant

Sill Bimmons

Famous Jameis’ Crab And Rape Shack.

I’d eat there.

Spur

Winston looked like he was jogging

King Hippo

Watching the 9ers game on RZ is less depressing. Goddamnit

Covalent Blonde

Even more impressive given the injury list!

King Hippo

You can’t go wrong with a Lucky Pierre

fleshwound_NPG

Our only hope is Andy Dalton.

King Hippo

So…when’s the suicide party again?

hippofant

Blake Bortles is beating Matt Ryan. HUH?

Moonbatting Average

Just got back from shoppinWHAT THE FUCK BRONCOS

Doktor Zymm

This is not a good game. I do not need to wait until half time to put on boots and walk to a place to watch more shitty football. I CAN DO IT. #UPFORANYTHING

Rape the football?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

No, YOU’RE drunk

entropy

“YEAH SO?!”