Your Second Thanksgiving Game Open Thread

Well that was fun, wasn’t it? Food and booze were consumed, no? Yes. I hear the Booze Gods calling my name as I type.

Car @ Dal: I think this’ll be the “Game Of The Day”. Romo’s back and the Cowboys look a lot less Weedenish all of a sudden. The Muscle Camster continues his relentless push to make everyone forget that he pilfered a laptop and wrote his name on it back in college. So far it’s not working. Good luck to both teams except for Dallas!

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makeitsnowondem

If I’m going to continue drinking, it’ll have to be hard liquor. I just can’t fit the beer and wine in anymore.

entropy

That’s what I said in Germany last year, and people looked at me funny for drinking whiskey all night.

Redshirt

Packers are playing next Thursday? Is Color Rush still going on?

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makeitsnowondem

Thank you. My stomach’s way more empty now.

Beerguyrob

UGH! Is that bile-yellow and salad-shit-green?

Redshirt

I want the Cowboys to put Greg Hardy in at QB and have the OL just not block the defense.

Doktor Zymm

Preach on.

Doktor Zymm

Hm, the large amount of food in my stomach seems to be slowing the rate of absorption of alcohol into my bloodstream. Given my intake, I’m far less FUCKK DALLAS than usual.

entropy

Yeah, you’ve been remarkably even handed toward Dallas. You should probably rectify that.

Doktor Zymm

They’re just so pathetic. I have no problem kicking a team when they’re down. I draw the line at down, passed out, and bleeding from an ear.

Old School Zero

Yeah, that’s not when you kick them. That’s when you stick a finger up their butt.

John Difool

Somebody seems upset… amazing the Dallas fans didn’t think this could possibly befall them in their own stadium on Thanksgiving day. But it did….DEAL WITH IT

John Difool

“I’m Tony Romo… and I’m arts and craftsy, paper mache’ bones Tony Romo…”

Too soon?

JustStopDude

Now to just close this game up, I want a 15 minute “Lord of the Dance” style TD celebration by Cam on the Star,

Just imagine the white sports writers going fucking insane over that!

entropy

Tony Romo is EMITTING x-rays, Tracy. Get it right.

Doktor Zymm

He’s his own night light!

entropy

Hah! He’s not from Jersey, is he?

Doktor Zymm

Artist’s rendering of Tony Romo at night, when the radioactivity builds up :
http://theinfosphere.org/images/thumb/b/ba/Glowing_Fry.jpg/225px-Glowing_Fry.jpg

Sharkbait

+9 rads

Doktor Zymm

entropy

Damn. That was a NICE pass.

makeitsnowondem

I feel like the Cowboys look like they feel. Why did we make so much food

The Maestro

Y’all remember when Tony Romo was banging Jessica Simpson? Those were heady days for the Cowboys.

Bortleback

Nowadays she looks like he probably feels right now – there’s been better days

http://media3.popsugar-assets.com/files/2015/01/07/927/n/1922398/4871fb0680bed3fd_JessTop.xxxlarge.jpg

Old School Zero

Cassel’s mustache looks fake.

Doktor Zymm

The Cowboys final record? Romo – All Other Games

Doktor Zymm

Oh, hey. I guess the [*Redacted] s will get to play a Romoless Cowboy team after all. My prediction of the Cowboys bringing Romo back to soon and a reinjury occuring have come true.

**Just a note, I actually have great respect for Romo, he goes through hell. I just hate the Cowboys and I find the fact that they rely on him so much but make no effort to protect him hilarious/face palmy.***

***Additional note. I only route for injuries in the case of people like Hardy or Winston.***

Beerguyrob

So, I’ve walked in the door to discover the Cowboys have narrowed the difference from 20 to 24 points, and Romo is possibly done for the season?

Good thing I stopped off to grab that Bushmills.

JustStopDude

Double J trades with Cleveland for Manziel now right?

Bortleback

That or he makes Greg Hardy play QB to pay him back for all the negative press

litre_cola

If we slow it down, we can actually see the point where Candace Romo’s heart shatters. Good work CBS.

John Difool

Wait, Romp is straight and married? When the hell did that happen?

blackroseMD1

Romo dead again?

entropy

Does this count as a whole different sort of Romobyl? Not a meltdown, per se, but definitely Ann event you have to inform the regulatory body about?

Redshirt

…and the Dallas Cowboys’ 2015 season is over. Again.

John Difool

Goodnight Sweet China Syndrome Prince…

King Hippo

Mistuh Romonobyl, he re-dead

Sharkbait

Stop stop he’s already dead

Old School Zero

ROMO DEAD

Doktor Zymm

If I were to draw a graph of the number of words I use on the y-axis with my BAC on the x-axis, the graph would initially slope up, then begin to turn downwards again around 0.05. Once it gets past 0.15 it sticks at 3 until I pass out. Those three words, as people who have attended other liveblogs can attest, are “FUCK THE COWBOYS.”

I’m also capable of expressing laughter via text, albeit with some errors as to capitalization etc. Like, “HAHAHAHAahaha!!!1”

litre_cola

In pain? Constipated? Take these three pills and you will be like Peyton Manning!

makeitsnowondem

I think it’s about time for some opioid-induced constipation.

Doktor Zymm

I think the Cowboys are in that suitcase labelled “constipation”

entropy

SIX FOOT OXY!!

King Hippo

sooooooo jelly

entropy

In all honesty, the minute any medication that isn’t, y’know, acid, starts talking to me? I’m walking straight into the ocean and not coming back.

King Hippo

This is the time on Spockets when the Cowboys fans go home.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

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Time to start river dancing TD celebrations.

entropy

Not gonna lie, I would laugh my ass off at that.

Old School Zero

See also: baseketball

Doktor Zymm

I think Cam just did the Mashed Potato as his celebration dance! Seasonal!

Doktor Zymm

Go Crotch!

entropy

I say that fairly often, even without football being on

Doktor Zymm

The Cowboys are really good at getting really dumb penalties. One of my favorites is when they got an excessive celebration penalty cause a fat dude lost his balance and fell on his butt in the end zone.

King Hippo

It’s like Dallas isn;t very good.

Bortleback

Jones trying to do a Collins/Chancellor on it – just without the required leaping ability

entropy

First down to Crotchety!

Ex-Jet Jericho, doing well for his new team….. God Damn him.

Doktor Zymm

His name sounds like Crotch. Ya gotta wish him some good in his life.

Mother Puncher

How was your day. I just listened to my aunt talk about how we shouldn’t feel bad for the victims in Paris because of what France did to Algiers.

entropy

I love holding grudges.

Doktor Zymm

You should bring up the state of former French colonies in Africa.
“What do they expect with the state the left the Congo in!?”

The Maestro

She sounds pleasant. Wonder what she thinks about the refugees coming to America.

Doktor Zymm

HAHAHAHA,
“Hey Cam, what you up to?”
“Why, I’m up to pickup up 24 yards exactly on third down.”

Redshirt
entropy

Was he on.Fargo last week?

Doktor Zymm

So it’s the Carolina Sweat Stains vs. the Dallas those pants don’t hide your butts.

Doktor Zymm

Hardy has been bombastic? Like the Shaggy song, except not fantastic?

entropy

No, like the weird acoustic versions of Airborne Toxic Event songs.

John Difool

With his pimp hand….

John Difool

HAPPY HONDAKKAH !

Doktor Zymm

I should totally test my microbiome tomorrow. What do my gut bacteria make of Thanksgiving?

entropy

Ooooooooo they could make a hat, or a broach, or a bird…

Doktor Zymm

If it’s not a pterodactyl I’m gonna be totes disappoint..

entropy

They’re YOUR bacteria. Train em up.

Redshirt

Apparently DoorFliesOpen doesn’t understand the “I understood that reference” GIF.

Bortleback

Is Luuuuuke also intercepting the play call signal from Princeton Red to the speaker in Romo’s helmet?

Old School Zero

I ATE TOO MU–/explodes

Doktor Zymm

It’s….probably not right to scoop up the goop that was OSZ and make pate…

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Doktor Zymm

This has no relevance to the game. I just wish I had a pineapple wedge garnish on my sparkling wine.

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Doktor Zymm

I love the internet. We have powers that hundreds of previous generations would deem witchcraft, and we use them to make crude gifs of dancing fruit.

entropy

Carl Sagan once wrote, “Television is a medium that has not lived up to its promise.”

Imagine if he saw the modern internet.

Sharkbait

How he isn’t hurt yet is beyond me

The Maestro

You can’t hurt what’s already dead.

Shogun Marcus

The downside of your defense being competent is your offense goes back on the field.

entropy

Yeah, but two plays later your competent defense comes back out!

Doktor Zymm

What happens if someone kicks a ball into the giant TV? I’m totally blanking. Is it considered out of bounds?

Shogun Marcus

Nope. Live ball.

Redshirt

Dead ball. Rekick.

Shogun Marcus

Coulda swore I heard it was live. Then again, I think it was from PK.

Shogun Marcus

I stand down. Redshirt is correct.

Redshirt

“Redshirt is correct.”

I’ve seen these words before, but never in that order.

Shogun Marcus

I feel your pain. Thought you’d appreciate it.

entropy

We have two conflicting opinions. Obviously, it means Patriots ball.

Bortleback

Touchdown Seahawks?

entropy

We really should be allowed to run the NFL, just for one weekend.