I’m sitting in a neighborhood bar with one single very loud mouthed Pats fan (in a Brady jersey of course) who keeps screaming at the TV at every single play. I am going to break a long neck beer bottle over his head and then jam the jagged end into his jugular vein. I’m pretty sure even a public defender could get me an acquittal in a jury trial.
THIS BRETT FAVRE I CALL HIM DRAKE BECAUSE WHEN YOU HEAR THAT HOTLINE BLING IT CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING. Also, the ridiculous amount of way too much hype.
I love commercials where a someone gets their spouse a Mercedes for Christmas. Really speaks to me, or rather, to someone that probably doesn’t exist anywhere.
And with that, the TV is officially off. I appreciated the quantity of footy over the past 4 days, for sure, but I can’t say I loved the severity or the number of kicks to the testicles over the past 36 hours.
Recovery Whiskey
November 29, 2015 9:49 pm
Yeah I think that’ll do it. Last beers up for grabs
Patriots/Eagles should be entertaining at least. I can see that being the only game left in the season that the Eagles win. Erratic winds shift NFC East tire fires in unpredictable ways.
“JJ Watt was found lying on the ground with several horse tranquilizer darts in his neck and a message on one that said “Grumblegrumbledartsdoyourgrumblejob.” He is questionable for Sunday.”
This can stop any time now.
I’m sitting in a neighborhood bar with one single very loud mouthed Pats fan (in a Brady jersey of course) who keeps screaming at the TV at every single play. I am going to break a long neck beer bottle over his head and then jam the jagged end into his jugular vein. I’m pretty sure even a public defender could get me an acquittal in a jury trial.
http://img.pandawhale.com/post-30526-Hot-Fuzz-greater-good-gif-Simo-fRNY.gif
That’s a great movie.
I’ll hide the body.
Just make sure you finish the beer first. Don’t want to be wasteful.
Pro tip: Once you’ve penetrated the jugular, twist the jagged bottle neck band and forth to ensure maximal shreddage. Godspeed.
Did Al really just mention Brett Favre’s texts?
Maybe, but I didn’t hear “tiny cock” so maybe not.
THIS BRETT FAVRE I CALL HIM DRAKE BECAUSE WHEN YOU HEAR THAT HOTLINE BLING IT CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING. Also, the ridiculous amount of way too much hype.
I love commercials where a someone gets their spouse a Mercedes for Christmas. Really speaks to me, or rather, to someone that probably doesn’t exist anywhere.
Brady disagrees with an official’s call? This can only result in one thing:
I dig the border that pic came with. Wish I could do that on all my lame submissions.
I hope one day a ref tells Brady to fuck off.
I imagine it’ll look something like this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tlgOMjMWsA
Do. Not. Want.
Holding on the Pat’s? What are these shenanigans?
And negating a big play?
It’s a bunch of shitassery, I tell you.
http://i.imgur.com/CBYYfyi.gif
This game has taken a refreshing turn.
My faith in the zebras has been restored!
Bleergh?
I’ve drank 2 liters of water since I re-woke up. My liver and kidneys do fine work.
V8 is another secret weapon. Trust me it helps.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/4e7e6601741ef493b5c81ab3a7287843/tumblr_n08ot1x6EG1saa4c5o1_400.gif
Did he just compare CJ Anderson to a crab?
Beer’s all gone, time to raid the wife’s emergency Merlot reserves.
The refs actually sided with a team not the Patriots?
http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130304201731/mlp/images/4/4a/Mind_blowing.png
http://49.media.tumblr.com/ee49904e0b2316ecdc3fbd8d3392393b/tumblr_nx0h3mv0iM1qfmfmco1_400.gif
Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
Hi everyone
My Canadian football time lost and there is no snow so I am sad
Also I have drank all the alcohol in my house
What should I do
I will down a shot of my finest, cheapest rum in your dark times.
Be strong.
You lost me at Canadian “football”.
My continuing love of this game rides on this call….
OK then, let’s continue.
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/167/947/640/5%20shirtless%20ron.jpg
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/167/947/640/4%20cloris%20mozelle.jpg
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/167/947/640/1%20yodellin%20zeke.jpg
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/167/947/640/3%20freddie-boy%20and%20yuma.jpg
SWEET SWEET PATRIOTS DERP
Was it a Dreamboat pick six? If not, not enough.
Muff of punt
God damnit.
Impressive spin on that drop.
MINNIE SEZ: FUCK THE PATS
http://i.imgur.com/i6DlAzI.jpg
Never diss Minnie, she was at least the real thing.
that’s why she hates the pats!
I like to think that guy carries around a Sharpie for that specific purpose.
He writes “Disappointment” on his daughter’s head every week.
And with that, the TV is officially off. I appreciated the quantity of footy over the past 4 days, for sure, but I can’t say I loved the severity or the number of kicks to the testicles over the past 36 hours.
Yeah I think that’ll do it. Last beers up for grabs
Woooo!
/Ducks
https://youtu.be/jQ0ujkGDQTU?t=1m47s
(wet fart noise)
I truly despise this game that I love.
Hunter S. Thompson may have been on to something…
And his answer was lots and lots of drugs!
THAT SAYS IT ALL SO VERY WELL
Goodnight guys. Fuck the patriots. Fuck the NFL. Fuck this season.
Goddammit.
Insurmountable lead.
At least you lived up to your name. It helped dull the pain, along with the opiates.
YOUR FAKE SNOW IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD
Joe Walsh. Drink.
Patriots/Eagles should be entertaining at least. I can see that being the only game left in the season that the Eagles win. Erratic winds shift NFC East tire fires in unpredictable ways.
Won’t it be hilarious when the Iggles somehow get to the NFC Championship Game?
One of the few times I’d cheer for the Beagles.
So…the Giants could beat the Panthers, and I guess the fucking Texans could beat the P*ts? Christ, we’re boned.
Christ could the Pats have a softer schedule?
“JJ Watt was found lying on the ground with several horse tranquilizer darts in his neck and a message on one that said “Grumblegrumbledartsdoyourgrumblejob.” He is questionable for Sunday.”
Only if they moved to the NFC East
Osweiler is years behind PeyPey in being pissed off visibly at teammates. And I fear there may not be time for him to catch up.
Each drive more puntier than the last!
PUNTS FOR THE PUNT GOD!
Aw, Brock says “Omaha” too!
I LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU!!
I remember those PSAs like it was yesterday.
Merry Christmas Stevie!!! Yes, it is a real Steinway (Shhhhhhh).
I wouldnt fuck with a blind piano player http://i713.photobucket.com/albums/ww135/sean_witzke/ray_gun.jpg
Fuck Stevie Wonder’s cheesy muthafuckin’ song.
Blount’s getting rolled up in snow, this game is taking me back…. Way Way Back.
http://i.imgur.com/f0lIgJv.jpg
WHERE OH WHERE ARE YOU TONIGHT, WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME HERE ALL ALONE
AHHH, SEARCHED THE WORLD OVER AND THOUGHT I FOUND TRUE LOVE…..
Fucking Stevie Wonder. Fuck, that guy is amazing.
Counterpoint above!
Sure it was a commercial song, but that dude’s voice is classic.
So many dropped passes. If only there were some way to make the ball squishier and easier to grip.
Punter taking soccer lessons. No yellow card.
Talib’s gotta fucking catch that
Was too busy trying to stick his fingers in his eye
The ball was iced up, son!
Quickness is not a synonym for speed? Well, Roget, fuck you AND your stinkin thesaurus.