Bal @ Cle: 34% of the Ravens salary is on either the IR or PUP list. These folks include Flacco, Forsett, Smith Sr., Suggs, Perriman and Pitta. Needless to say, Baltimore wants a do-over for 2015. Sir Matthew of Schaubton gets the start tonight unlike the human self-destruct button that is QB Manziel. If you were a Ravens 4th round rookie RB (Buck Allen) getting his very first start and could pick any team to play against you would probably pick the Browns and their league-worst run defense. Something to say about Cleveland…hmm…well, Gruden in his game teaser on ESPN (that Tirico didn’t bother to show up for) says that he’s a BIG FAN of the SUPER SPEEDY Travis Benjamin. He may have been reaching.
I’m hoping for a sequence of events that results in this game being Clausen vs Manziel.
That salsa is NOT sitting well.
http://49.media.tumblr.com/0cd14dad68e59bf74640722c289b5b04/tumblr_nirfl2EpTy1qedb29o1_500.gif
I feel like all of the most exciting plays in football are more likely to happen when you’re watching two shit teams.
FLEAFLICKER!
The rare infinite reverse?
That’s what we like to tell ourselves.
Wow. That looked serious for a second.
HOLY SHIT TUCKER JUST KILLED A GUY!!!!!
http://40.media.tumblr.com/8ecb94616fcd6a233d5309dd94ff8c46/tumblr_nbhrkrJiTt1ric2iqo1_1280.jpg
if nobama reely cared bout volence hed stop the black criem in baltimore #2a #imapatroit
Preparing for Ann-Margretkkake…
I would drag my balls through broken glass for that woman
http://www.doctormacro.com/Images/Ann-Margret/Annex/Annex%20-%20Ann-Margret_33.jpg
Watching this Ravens offense is like jerking off with your left hand, the end result feels good, but you’re always doubting if you’re ever going to get there.
It’s the only thing I do lefty. I have no idea why.
http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/57950660.jpg
GET OUT OF MY HEAD
It’s like batting in baseball: the prettiest strokes are left-handed.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/b7798ba2edc05939c507c488907fa03a/tumblr_nufvoe9VzV1ric2iqo1_500.jpg
You hear that?!? That cry of anguish??
That’s the sound of millions of degenerate gamblers as the Ravens/Browns hit above 41….
I’m not sure if this game is entertaining, or we’ve just been reduced to into thinking it’s mildly interesting.
I’m gonna say entertaining, because I was just thinking to myself that it shouldn’t be this entertaining.
http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/creepypasta/images/2/2d/Barn_Burning_0093.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140909192107
http://41.media.tumblr.com/93678de31ab5c2c1aedd4f82d8aafadb/tumblr_nirhsx6kfD1r9msvko1_1280.png
http://41.media.tumblr.com/ed7548bb3d83069b6975036d9e30fafc/tumblr_nirhsx6kfD1r9msvko2_1280.png
10% of the fans in attendance are related to that guy.
Holy FUCKBALLS Trestman is creepy looking
He has “Easter egg” hunts on his lawn for the neighborhood kids 35 times a year.
THESE RAVENS, I CALL THEM FREDDIE GRAY, BECAUSE THEY’RE DESTROYING BALTIMORE’S WILL TO LIVE
http://49.media.tumblr.com/2bf2b89988fe8ea1fb5af38618c6e50d/tumblr_mzhat49cJj1qhhxf6o1_400.gif
Saying that Schaub was “Fooled by coverage” is like saying Chernobyl was “Fooled by Reactor No. 4”
http://inapcache.boston.com/universal/site_graphics/blogs/bigpicture/chernobyl_25th_anniversary/bp2.jpg
If I stop watching this, does it mean I’m a bad fan, or good at identifying shitty football?
http://36.media.tumblr.com/651d76e3d67b50f9819328300310bb96/tumblr_nid3p9ljvk1qhe849o1_1280.jpg
What’s the record for the most pick 6’s in a game?
I would like to see Schuab shatter that.
Thrown by a single quarterback? I don’t think it could be more than three.
Okay, so at least six players have thrown three pick sixes in a game, and Eli Manning’s the most recent. Also, Rich Gannon did it in a Super Bowl.
The record’s apparently 4.
It’s a Pick Sixmas miracle!
I hate that ad so fucking much.
That is what Matt Schaub specializes in.
you must bring us
A SCHAUBBERY
NI
Aaaaaand fuck it
no way that just happened
http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/609/382/609382/original.jpg
Like the warm embrace of a big spoon of heroin, there’s that Schaub we all love.
There’s your Schaub pick 6!!!!
Dear god the man is a machine!!!
Suddenly, I want a six topping pizza.
Shit, Marshal Yanda’s got some decent hands. McCown should try throwing to him instead of CJ Mosley.
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Dean Pees
Dean Pees who?
Dean pees down his leg every goddamn game!
As I see it, CJ Mosley is one of the worst receivers McCown has at his disposal and shouldn’t even be an option that early in the progression.
I just pulled a muscle – trying to get the coffee table closer to me because that’s where my bourbon is
DOLPHINS FIRIN’ THEIR LAZER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wp_DailAx2w
This has been around for like 10 years and it still makes me laugh every. damn. time.
The Mounties Bring the Grey Cup out….
http://i.ytimg.com/vi/bD77ln7vZJU/hqdefault.jpg
You used the wrong image for Grey Cup:
http://thefootballgirl.com/assets/images/steelers%20thing.jpg
Damn it. You beat me to it.
That’s the right shitting image……..shithawks, Rikki….Shithawks….
Shouldn’t it technically be one of Favre’s jockstraps instead though?
Why does AP ever do these Play 60 commercials with kids?
I’ve heard he is great at motivating kids…
Looks like the Dolphins are discharging their Lazors.
So… am I the only one who hopes an offensive coordinator named Lazor ends up in San Diego?
Oh, sure, Adrian Peterson’s so great. Let’s see him pass O.J. on the all-time crimes list though.
“If I Beat Him” by Adrian Peterson
So far, this game’s been fucking us…. long sword style.
https://youtu.be/P5wg4jUOLd8?t=4m52s
/That’s all I got, folks.
Hey, you guys.
The Patriots lost last night. That was pretty great, wasn’t it?
Yep!
My erection has lasted a lot longer than four hours, but I feel no need to see a doctor.
I too was exceptionally tumescent.
I liked that.
While i enjoyed it IMMENSELY, there were some who expressed great disdain for the happening before their very eyes.
Berman inadvertently makes an apt comparison. This game really is pretty much like spoiled five-day old Thanksgiving leftovers.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/5cf51ea5005542f0e2e719b900dfa95c/tumblr_nt75z7g75g1rgrg5oo1_1280.jpg
Oh, Chris Berman? Time to get ready for Fargo! G’Night all.
NUDIE SUIT
(his mom invented white-out)
http://i.imgur.com/kkkFsS6.jpg
COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONS
Toss your salad.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/b3aebc734c47e3ba7022129eee1a69f1/tumblr_nsahsgZV3U1rertyro2_250.gif
TOSS IT!!
http://49.media.tumblr.com/5d031054509a14233d9dbbac498b3834/tumblr_nsahsgZV3U1rertyro4_250.gif
“Ngata, Ngata…ngata gonna work here anymore!”
http://images1.fanpop.com/images/quiz/21431_1214500767967_500_263.jpg
http://49.media.tumblr.com/53eaec6cf21141477948db853aefd56e/tumblr_mskz0hqEsP1rlb6iho4_250.gif
Time to bust out the party favors…
“DIBS!” — Wes Welker
This reminds me: I think the Browns are going about this all wrong. They want Manziel to be sober for the game, but I think they should insist he not be,
In fact, I think we need to see Johnny Fucking Football after a shitton of ecstasy. Talk about a color rush game.
Fuckin time release bullshit….
Break the tablet to eliminate any timed release.
Was going to give up, but I can’t quit you NFL & commentists.
pinton clortis
No John we haven’t seen Ngata in a year. Because he’s a Lion. You dick.
You better Ngata mention that again.
/shows self out
Ngata left Baltimore for Detroit, Suh left Detroit for Miami, and all three teams got worse.
Every time I see Josh McCown play quarterback, I remember the season he replaced an injured Jay Cutler and how ready people were to dump Cutler to keep him.
That is why Bears fans deserve no good things.
Well, it’s not the ONLY reason, but yeah.