Your Week 16 Sunday Nighter Open Thread

NYG @ Min: According to one Giants fan site, D coordinator Steve Spagwhatever is still stewing about the loss to the Panthers. Buddy, you’ve got so much more to worry about than yet another defensive collapse. I just can’t see how he’ll be around next year. Sure he was dealt a bad hand (hah!) but there is next to no intensity on his unit (phrasing!) and the “powers” that be need a sacrificial lamb. It looks like Minny has a number of D guys ready to go today so I expect a whooping. The Vikes D was a dominating piece of work before injuries became an issue. I’m thinking a heavy dose of RB Peterson should make everything all good for Minny. That said, the Giants have a lousy habit of winning games they’re not supposed to. Did I make this game seem watchable? I’ll hang up and listen off air.

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Redshirt

Wow. The new US Bank Stadium is almost like the same person that designed Paul Brown Stadium decided, “I can go more uglier and more abstract”.

entropy

That stadium made me irrationally angry.

Redshirt

Which one: US Bank or PBS?

entropy

US Bank.

Redshirt

Ah. I only know of it by seeing it for about two seconds, but from I saw, I completely understand.

Old School Zero

Now, Shades Of Blue Velvet, directed by David Lynch, would be a show I would watch.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Without Dennis Hopper, what’s the point?

Redshirt

You know, if a team has officially entered “I don’t give a fuck” mode, the least they could do is put in backups or at least put everyone on injured reserve and sign people from the streets so they can say that they played in a real NFL game.

jjfozz

You know what Mr. DeNiro, it’s time to call it a day. Because you are making me sad.

makeitsnowondem

[Later, at the wedding reception…]

OFFICIAL: After review, this is not a reception.

Doktor Zymm

Damn Giants. I know the NFC East sucks, but you gotta reinforce it?

entropy

One of these years, she’s gonna figure out how to put the goddamn Christmas lights away properly:

http://nd06.jxs.cz/297/193/9f4d1319bf_96029773_o2.jpg

Doktor Zymm

If I did that, I might want some help.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Eli is playing terribly without his explosive reciever. When have I seen that before?

jjfozz

Eli not playing well because batteries in his BB-8 toy are beginning to run down

WCS

Does that get him a promotion to major?

WCS

I’ll show myself out.

jjfozz

Is it hot in here or is it just her
comment image

Doktor Zymm

There is clearly an AC unit right behind her. But yeah, I’ve worn cardigans like that if it’s a nice day.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Cardigan buttoning; many ways to do it correctly.+-

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Damn it; stuck in reply mode!

entropy

She seems smart. We should probably talk about important things, like the fiscal crisis in Greece and how much I like her method of sweater buttoning.

blackroseMD1

Store was out of Stone IPA, so I went with +Lagunitas Maximus.

Didn’t realize until beer #3 that it’s 8.2% ABV.

Hopefully that will help soften the blow of AP underperforming so far. Come on AP…I only need like 10 points from you.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Good work though; it is worth it.

blordinaryfagicmox

Was Cromartie just wearing a hoodie under his uniform?
comment image

jjfozz

My goal in 2016 is to permanently end the present Kardashian family – and ensure that any of their spawn – alive or in utero – never sees the light of day.

entropy

Murdergoals. Always a good thing.

Redshirt

Your thoughts intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Doktor Zymm

I reiterate. On the very poor chance that the Rosasea Dermatoids ascend to challenge for the football championship, all and sundry are invited to watch at my place, assuming they are not offended by my copious yelling at the jumping picture screen.

entropy

Did you miss the bit where I shouted “FUUUCCCKKKK AALLLLLLL OF YOOOUUUUU!” to the entire bar today? Shouting at the TV just seems like normal conversation.

Defensive Back Mike Wallace

Kyle Rudolph: pro bowl MVP

That alone destroys the Pro Bowl’s credibility.

entropy

“They’re 30 minutes away from where they want to be.”

Lake Minnetonka?

Col. Duke LaCross

The second half, or “Spring Breakers” on Showtime?

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I mean this game is like Gummo

Covalent Blonde

Scrubbing grout would win this second half if I weren’t so goddamned comfy

Beerguyrob

Mike Zimmer’s cold face accentuates his rage face.

entropy

The GE commercial kid’s adopted, right?

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Well the lights at a fire station never run out

Beerguyrob

He should program their heat to go out.

Bugg

“I can pick up the hammer, Dad. And now I’m gonna beat you two bastards to death with it!”

Covalent Blonde

King Arthur’s Sword of Sexuality

Doktor Zymm

He was the only one who could pull it out of some rocks?

Covalent Blonde

Nice.

Redshirt

I think someone confused this thread for a porno search engine again.

Redshirt

Um. That Mercedes wouldn’t make it out of Santa’s Village in the snow, let alone the North Pole.

Bugg

Eli needs to complete some passes,. Oh, thanks, Michelle.

entropy

“We need to score some points, keep the ball out of the hands of the opposing team.”

This has been another installment in Obvious Comments Made To Sideline Reporters.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

“We just need to stop dry humping defenseless receivers and screaming ‘WORLD STAR’ after every incompletion.”

Doktor Zymm

“The other team has been sportsing hard, we need to sports harder!”

Bugg

“We need 8 yard runs” . You don’t say? Also, don’t shit your pants, unless Depends is a sponsor.

Doktor Zymm

That’s a stupid hat for 14 degrees. She should be wearing somethhttp://assets.craniumfitteds.com/images/main/2-Washington-[*Redacted] s-NFL-Team-Colors-The-Team-Trapper-New-Era-Winter-Hat-1.jpging like this :

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

*some meth.

Doktor Zymm

Effective, but you won’t get a receipt

Beerguyrob

BLEERGH is pleased to be out only ten seconds into the half.

jjfozz

The word “pedigree” is a great word. I like it alot – how it sounds, its spelling, its meaning.

When it’s used in regard to the NFL, it’s a fucking travesty.

Beerguyrob

How else will Chip Kelly pick players? He just can’t say he cut people because they are black.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Covalent Blonde

Oh can’t you, Cris? I would say Dallas would disagree.

Redshirt

I see Eli did not earn his celebratory Chocolate Milk carton at halftime.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Same with Peyton and his “Muscle Milk”

makeitsnowondem

The real solution to NFL overtime is to adopt the college format but start from the 35.

Redshirt

Simple solution. You can’t punt the ball in OT. If you chose to take the ball, you drive must end with either a field goal or going for it on fourth down.

ballsofsteelandfury

I feel like having a tantrum Lil’ Middle Fozz style. I’m waiting for takeout at Panda Inn and everyone is annoying me to no end. Plus, it apparently takes 35 minutes to pour two orders of soup into a takeout container and steam some edamames.

Sill Bimmons

/deep breathing &tc…

ballsofsteelandfury

The only good thing is that the TV is on mute and I missed dipshit Costas talking out of his ass.

Covalent Blonde

There have some remarkable Crisisms you missed

blordinaryfagicmox

Pandas are notoriously slow and apathetic about sex, so it’s probably taking them a while to jerk off in your soup before they can pour it.

Sill Bimmons

Try to stay out of bourble.

Doktor Zymm

ooh, I have edmame in my freezer. I should eat that.

Doktor Zymm

Hey, thanks cost nothing. If you want health care though….

synapticmisfires

Seriously, fuck Bob Costas with a needle full of botox.

...

I love all this Bob Costas hate. Thank each and every one of you for brightening my evening with it.

Sill Bimmons
blordinaryfagicmox

I thought the game was over but it’s only halftime? I don’t deserve this kinda treatment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpdgSKVsFu8

jjfozz

Chicago phlebotomists!
Chicago pet store owners!
Chicago cobblers!
Chicago milkmen!

Romonobyl

You left out the convenient store clerks. YOU LEFT OUT THE CONVENIENCE STORE CLERKS!!!!!

Old School Zero

Chicago recyclers!

entropy

Chicago Typewriter Repairmen!

Sill Bimmons

CHICAGO ORGAN GRINDERS

Beerguyrob

Chicago SPCA. They’re the animals.

synapticmisfires

According to Bob Costas, no one wants the excitement of a single possession deciding overtime.

Overtime should be decided via a 2/3s majority vote following strict parliamentary procedures. Way more exciting.

Covalent Blonde

I have been waiting for it to go to a shootout for years!

blordinaryfagicmox

Whoever can throw the most footballs through a tire wins

entropy

What, with like guns and shit? Because that would be highly entertaining, but probably season-ending for a lot of people.

Sill Bimmons
Beerguyrob

I think Dan was openly wondering what’s been put in Al’s cocoa.

Romonobyl

Had to make a convenience store beer run. I’m stuck with Corona…pray for me.

blordinaryfagicmox
Doktor Zymm

FUCKING DUMB. Instant death is the rule in most sports. It’s a bit different cause of the possession rules, but if you can’t stop a TD in one drive, you probably should lose.

makeitsnowondem

Costas is unaware that the math on his proposed rule change decidedly favors the second team to get the ball.

entropy

The only thing that matters to that fuck is that NE lost today. Nothing else even comes into consideration.

Sill Bimmons
Horatio Cornblower

Ah yes, Bob Costas arguing for the OT rules to be changed after the Patriots lose in OT. How unpredictable.

entropy

FUCK YOU BOB JUST BECAUSE NEW ENGLAND MADE A BONEHEAD MOVE AND LOST THE GAME DOES NOT MEAN WE HAVE TO CHANGE THE FUCKING RULES AGAIN!!! GOD DAMN I HATE THAT FUCKING TEAM.

jjfozz

Bob Costas, I wish a fucking brick wall would fall on you. Because you are a giant dick. Fuck you.

Wakezilla

So, according to Tony Dungy, the Falcons figured out the best way to beat the Panthers is to have great pass protection so your QB can get the ball to a stud receiver?

This man gets paid tens of thousands of dollars to talk about football. . .