Dear Lord! There’s another Republican debate tonight? From Detroit?! The Fox Theater?! On Fox News?!
/checks cable package; relieved Fox News isn’t listed
//wishes Robocop was real
///ends up on FBI watch list
It might be fun to watch Megyn Kelly grind Trump’s balls, if all those other chucklefucks weren’t going to trip on each other trying to do it instead. It’ll probably end up making Trump look better. At least Carson’s not there. If there was any justice in the world, Matt Millen would be the moderator and just spend the entire two hours asking questions about sandwiches and NCAA eligibility.
Forgive the Canadian obsession with US politics, but the presidential campaign matters almost as much to us. As Justin’s dad once said:
Living next to you is in some ways like sleeping with an elephant. No matter how friendly and even-tempered is the beast, if I can call it that, one is affected by every twitch and grunt.
Because the debate’s in Detroit – the Assembly Line of Miserableness – I’ve tried to line up which candidate matches a Lions QB from years past. Opinions may vary:
- Jeb!: Scott Mitchell – Mama’s boy; never really wanted the job, just the money. Got fat & went home.
- Ben Carson: Rodney Peete – considered strong when drafted, but faltered quickly under the lights.
- John Kasich: Eric Hipple – a good & decent man surrounded by awful teammates.
- Marco Rubio: Dan Orlovsky – who else can you picture running out of the end zone?
- Ted Cruz: Joey Harrington – always optimistic in the face of abject failure; looks good on paper.
- Trump: comes out in Matt Stafford, but rips off jersey on stage to reveal a Bobby Layne
- “What’s Stafford done? Nothing! He’s so bad he made Megatron retire. I don’t wear garbage. Bobby Layne – that guy was a winner. I only wear winners!”
Considering the Republican convention is being held in the Factory of Sadness July 18-21, I’m sure there will be thinkpieces comparing the Browns organization and whatever Republican civil war has erupted by then. I can already see Jimmy Haslam yee-hawing his way to the stage. Our only true salvation at that time will be meteor.
Enough talk – to the games! (all times eastern)
NHL: (12 games total)
- Rangers @ Penguins – 7:00
- Blackhawks @ Bruins – 7:00
- Tampa Bay @ Ottawa – 7:30
- Habs @ Kings – 10:30
NBA: (4 games total)
- Spurs @ Pelicans – 8:00
- Sacramento @ Dallas – 8:30
- Thunder @ Warriors – 10:30
NCAA:
Basketball: (Reminder: the tournament starts two weeks today!)
- Illinois @ #14 Maryland – 7:00
- #25 Cal @ #18 Arizona – 9:00
- What the hell is ESPN 3? There’s so few seeds playing most games have been shuffled to the Trois
Hockey: The Div-1 Hockey East tournament begins tonight. Road to the Frozen Four!
- New Hampshire @ Merrimack – 7:00
Finally, on today’s date in 1931, “The Star Spangled Banner” was adopted as the US national anthem & signed into law by Herbert Hoover. To commemorate this fact, it’s gotta be Whitney:
That’s the good stuff. INTO THE NIGHT, MY PRETTIES!
Speaking of ‘Sunny’ here’s a thought I had at the end of last night’s episode.
This will be the final season, the gang really is dead and Mac realized he was gay only in the last episode, albeit one that took two nights to complete.
http://56.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mbqjf1xbtj1qzls9yo1_1280.jpg
http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2014-09/5/15/enhanced/webdr01/anigif_enhanced-20592-1409946876-1.gif
Here’s hoping last night’s Sunny washes the suck of that game off
PROTIP: You do not want to be on the same cruise ship as The Gang.
http://56.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_koivt4KvUl1qz733uo1_1280.jpg
Rage, gluttony, lust and gay.
Did I miss anything?
I want to go see ‘Miracles From Heaven’ with Sill.
I’m there.
Oh good, we’re back to the wall the Mexicans are going to pay for to keep them out.
My god the raging id of the Republican party is frightening, disturbing and sad.
Nah. Just sad.
http://gawker.com/mexican-secretary-of-finance-under-no-circumstances-1762774988
“Let me say this emphatically and categorically: under no circumstances is Mexico going to pay for the wall that Mr Trump is proposing…building a wall between Mexico and the United States is a terrible idea, based on ignorance, and has no basis in the reality of North American integration…we have enormous needs and much more important uses for the public budget.”
“We will also build a giant air shield around the planet, and make the REAL goddamn aliens pay for it!”
-Trump, just saying whatever pops into his head now
I responded to your drawing below; nice work.
Thanks, Moose! I’m glad I stepped back from it, because it’s much more in line with what I wanted now. I’d have screwed it up if I just pushed through before.
Thank you, mister.
Don’t build a wall, build a MALL.
Happy shoppers on both sides of the border.
You know Trump’s wall, only 12 feet high, would cost like 50 times more expensive than the Panama Canal…with ZERO economic benefit.
But that’s totes cool bros, cuz the wetbacks have to pay for it!
Based on the price of Concrete…its just $700 million if you had all the raw material there and ready to go. Rebar…its a straight up $1 billion…just to get the rebar…not to get it on site or install it.
I mean assuming 40,000 workers for like 4 years, spit balling and carrying the two…my numbers come up to $40 billion…and thats only 40 foot concrete walls (10 feet in the ground). Gonna have to include service roads, toilets, housing, etc for the workers. So the cost will just keep going up.
“They can just shit on the Mexican side, right on the ground.”
–Trump planning committee
SMOOTHIES FOR EVERYONE
http://57.media.tumblr.com/21e0eb057550156af250047a2a33eedd/tumblr_o38ks38wxP1s01qkyo1_400.gif
WAY TO SCORE THE EMPTY NETTER YOU FAT FUCK
The American people vs. Donald Trump
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4anpxoHkPI
At least we still have Lana.
And her truckasaurous hands.
LAAAANAAAAAAAAAAA!
http://cdn.makeagif.com/media/6-24-2015/gLQpE6.gif
I am all over the place tonight.
Anyway, I maintain that Tim Curry as Darkness in 1985’s Legend is one of the best, if not THE best, actor transformations using solely practical effects of all time:
http://nerdist.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/timCurryLegend05172015.jpg
Tough call…are we just referring to well known actors? There are plenty of specialists in Sci-fi movies right up there. And I have a huge soft spot for Ron Pearlman for some of his roles.
I agree with you on the Ron Pearlman assessment, but it took me YEARS to see Tim Curry in that face. Pearlman’s one truly undefined role was as Hellboy (which I alaso loved), but considering that Legend was done in 1985, and he actually wore those giant goddamn horns, I choose this as my all-time favorite.
So this is pretty much what the GOP debates (and primaries) have devolved to:
And this:
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-02/9/7/enhanced/webdr02/anigif_enhanced-buzz-31273-1423485784-12.gif
So do I, but you don’t see me broadcasting it all over the fucking place.
And this:
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-02/9/7/enhanced/webdr02/anigif_enhanced-buzz-31273-1423485784-12.gif
That fucking show.
I wish this had been Samantha’s sex swing:
I always wanted to film an episode of that show, during its initial run, only switch all the genders. See how much hatred it received from all the fuckers who loved how empowering it was for women.
That was Entourage
Ops…blacked out for a 20 minutes…what I have missed on the debates…it seems like Rubio and Trump are just shouting over each other…
Trump says he has a big dick.
http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/nz9yv16diuqkje2nzvklxf95ipmjuxxi
Tell me you at least watched Hap and Leonard, if only for the Hendricks Factor.
Nope.
DAMMIT SOMEONE NEEDS TO WATCH THAT SHOW AROUND THESE PARTS BESIDES ME SO I CAN TALK ABOUT HOW FUCKING AWESOME IT IS.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmyzFsYEdco
One more Charlotte. I hate my brother sometimes. https://gfycat.com/EnviousObedientCavy
When does training camp start? https://gfycat.com/HastyIllBigmouthbass
Sill, I replied to the private message about the graphic novel.
Great!
Will read it and get back to you.
http://www.caringclownsinternational.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/Clown-shoes.jpg
They left someone out…
Trump is the one with the small foot, right?
Shit. It costs too much to get buzzed/
On a mission from God.
http://esq.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/15/07/54dafb64d2321_-_39-jennifer-lawrence-strut.gif
Gilly is cute as fuck.
http://gfycat.com/OrnateSmugKinkajou
No wonder why Sam Hodor’d so fast.
Damn right.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjUIiXd_BcQ
Huzzah for butt dimples!
So, Trump just talked about how big is dong is.
He started talking about his hands so I switched back to Ice Patriots v. Ice Bears.
I had a feeling things weren’t going to end well on that one.
SURE, now that Dr. Ben’s no longer on stage…
What do you expect after him saying that if he wanted, the “big choker” Mitt would have gotten down on his knees for Trump?
They wouldn’t have let this on the air if they knew you could go frame-by-frame in glorious HD.
https://gfycat.com/FlawedNastyIndochinesetiger
Hey look, someone remembered John Kasich is on the stage.
WHEN IS JIM WEBB GOING TO BE ALLOWED TO SPEAK?!?
Better be soon or he’s liable to kill somebody.
He’ll do that anyway. He’s probably got a trunk full of Vietnamese hookers in a steamer truck just to relax.
Don’t have cable so streaming Cal at Arizona on my gf’s computre and HDMI-ing it to the TV. The future is amazing.
Also, ranked number 16 in a weak CBB season?! This is the worst UA team ever.
Trump’s hair is like those court room TV broadcast where a victim is testifying and they have to blur the witness out to protect their identity.
GOD DAMN IT!
http://cdn3-www.idly.craveonline.com/assets/uploads/2016/02/Charlotte-McKinney-GQ-Mexico-1.jpg
“BOO, MITT ROMNEY! THAT PIECE OF SHIT I VOTED FOR WITH ENTHUSIASM!”
No kidding! The crows has picked, and their pick is Trump.
“THOUGH IN THE SPIRIT OF FULL DISCLOSURE I SHOULD MENTION THAT IT WAS REALLY JUST SO THE BLACK GUY WOULDN’T WIN!”
King Henrik might be hurt.
McDonough K’ed him TFO.
Thanks, Sean!
Time for the Crazy.
Moose. I am sorry I have been a procrastinating ratbastard pimp son of a bitch on your league-winning drawing….. but this here is the work in progress, which I have returned to after a time spent drawing a lot of an adolescent kaiju destroying the world because he lost his balloon, and some time sketching the shit out of moose faces. It’s still not right, but I’m back on this image full-time, at least:
http://56.media.tumblr.com/a7d4e24ff35660e6ce0adc925c3ddd5e/tumblr_o3hs2hoNik1uf51wyo1_1280.jpg
Nice!
I’ve been doing a bunch of ‘toon layouts lately…quick sketches that I scan in, and then tighten, ink & color in Manga Studio. Makes me wonder how I used to do it all by hand.
I draw everything by hand for full-bore illustrations. All the color work, a lot of text when I have it, even the weird geometry stuff I add when I’m drawing “magic…” I have an aversion to using the computer for that stuff. But for laying out comics and comic strips, I just do the inks in black and scan the image, then add all that after, in some graphics app or another.
I have a very strange workflow with artwork, it would seem.
I like the PC, since I can work in layers…go over the layouts in blue & red pencil, etc., which is a lot like using a lightbox, but much quicker.
Also, no more White-out!
I have never used white-out in a finished piece. I am rather amazed at that, since I work pretty exclusively in ink.
And I use layers for added color in some stuff, but since I like to provide the originals to clients and friends, I have a hard time showing them an image online and then saying, “and here are the scribbles it was BEFORE I used the computer!”
I have never used Manga Studio, though; how do you like it?
LOVE IT. Seriously, the current version (5) is that “Where have you been all my life?” software. It’s not the graphics/photo monster that PS is, but for comics, illos, painting, etc. it is great. I’m using an XP-Pen graphics tablet, which has great resolution and interfaces seemlessly with my PC, and it “feels” like working on paper, but with a lot more flexibility.
I’m going to have to try it out, then. I’ve been using various versions of Photoshop for years, but I’m always open to trying new software based on good recommendations.
Shouldn’t the moose be humping the Debbie?
I have standards.
for all the public work, anyway
Artistry takes time and redo; take it, drink it, live it. Cheers. I like the way it is going.
STUNNEDQVIST YANKED
The original Ghostbusters is so old Dana calls her fridge an icebox.
I know a bunch of piss babies have spent all day bitching about Ghostbusters, but … I just wanted to call them piss babies. That is all.
I am that pissbaby.
Fuck new Ghostbusters right in the pussy.
There’s…a new movie coming out, right? Or two? Or a series, or something?
Honestly, the first movie was fine, the second was meh, I can’t somehow bring myself to care about a moribund 30 year-old franchise.
^^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^^
The first one is the superior movie, the second has the best quotes. For instance:
“Oh Johnny, did you back the wrong horse. Would you hose him, please?”
“Only a CARPATHIAN… would come back NOW and choose New. York. City. Tasty pick, BONEHEAD. If you had brain one in that HUGE melon atop your head, you’d be living the sweet life in California’s beYOOOtiful San Fernando Valley.”
“Have you tried sleeping with it?”
I was OGPissBaby. I think that movie looks like refried dogshit.
I just watched the trailer after knowing almost nothing about the movie.
I didn’t realize it was a reboot. I thought it was a sequel-ish thing.
Don’t movie makers normally put the funniest parts in the trailer?
Good ones don’t
Its articles like this….
http://www.aol.com/article/2016/03/03/admitted-train-hopping-serial-killer-is-proud-looking-forward-t/21322155/
That makes me hope that Jim Tomsula is keeping safe on them rails…
Across tens of thousands of miles of rails, only one man can protect us from the roaming menace that rides the rails.
Jim Tomsula is …
THE RAILMAN
Fighting for Justice…with a crowbar and a can of beans…
So, let’s play make-believe.
The concerted establishment anti-Trump effort leads to a brokered convention.
Second ballot means delegates are #UpForWhomever
Establishment stages a coup and nominates…*?
That nominee names _________** as his VP pick?
* Can’t/won’t be any of the candidates who flamed out of the primary process to-date, and won’t be Rubio or Cruz, even if one of them is in second place to Trump at the convention. Ditto with Kasich. Pretty much narrows it down to Mittens or Paul Ryan.
** If it’s Mittens, he’s gotta open up one of his binders to get a woman on the ticket. Unless one of the also-rans from the primaries is viable. Actually, come to think of it, Kasich would be a smart choice for Mittens. If Paul Ryan ends up with the nomination, Kasich would be an even smarter pick. Or maybe he goes for “old foreign policy hand” (nevermind how wrong he is) and picks McCain.
I dunno. I don’t see a brokered convention happening. Either Trump will have the delegates, and/or a 3rd party run will be heavily backed by establishment GOP.
Reagan/Goldwater 2016
I think Goldwater wasn’t the wingnut he gets portrayed as. He got railroaded with the mushroom cloud.
And honestly, the “I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice! And let me remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue!” quote is actually pretty damned good. If Josiah Bartlet had said that, I’d have voted for him even after his MS scandal.
He’d be a moderate in these trying times. He had a main plank in his campaign to overturn the civil rights act, which…… you know.
No. He was an asshole totally deserving of all the ridicule and scorn that is heaped upon his rotting corpse.
Holy shit. Of course the Kochs are legacy Birchers.
John Birchers; oh man, my mom and dad would rant about those fucking assholes. They used to call the sheetless klansmen.
Even the Zambians are laughing their asses off.
Palin. Trump needs someone who is just in it for the ego and a TV deal. Its got to be Palin.
Trump/Palin would just be BRILLIANT!
Bieber/Cyrus 2016!
They look too much alike.
(fuck you Moose….you know it’s true)
Has anyone ever seen Bieber and Cyrus at the same time?
Aren’t they both played on SNL by Kate McKinnon?
Ghostbusters!
In a sane world Mats Zuccarello would be a floormat in a 1987 Volvo 240D.
SLAPS SELF ON ASS……….
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD.
Holy fuck….I went down to refill the liquor and now it’s 3-1?
WTF?
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Fucking penalty kill
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Jack-Donaghy-Pouring-Alcohol-Loop-30-Rock.gif
Reposting Lacey Chabert. http://gfycat.com/FreeGlassGalah
Well fuck.
Oh my god. Oilers are just toying with Phlly now. as;dfj;aslfd
GENOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It’s a beautiful day today. I’m sitting in my living room watching Ghostbusters because I can’t decide/am not wiling to go out again and drinking beer because the whisky doesn’t seem to get me drunk when I drink it and fuck everything.