Sooooooooooooooo…..
ISoG came to a rather inauspicious end this week. And yet you still have to hear about it, apparently. Yes, I’m a dick.
tWBS (to New Girl): Soooooo, ummmmm, Van….
New Girl: Look, just cut to the chase. I’m not some wilting flower you need to treat gently. Don’t try to schmooze me. Just tell me. The past week has already been a fucking nightmare.
So who is New Girl? Who is “Van….”?
Is she just some fantasy girl we referred to but never actually sprung on ya’s? Sort of I guess. But like Leticia, she was based in fact. And if we do continue the saga in the future, you’ll get to know her more. More or less, she is/was my idea of ballsofsteelandfury’s perfect woman. His perfect match, more or less (translation: The only woman I thought would put up with him).
But who is she based upon? Oh wouldn’t you like to know?????
Give it time, you’ll find out in just a little while.
–
Chris Cornell
When I started writing this post, Chris Cornell was still alive. Now he’s not.
As some of you no doubt recall, a few days ago we had a “discussion” about the pitfalls of meeting our “heroes”. I don’t use that word, FWIW. But I do admire people who are creative and enrich my life, tho. Over the years, I’ve had occasion to meet several of my “heroes”. More often than not, they’ve turned out to be great people.
But I never had occasion to meet Chris Cornell (came close once, but it was an odd night and a lot of shit happened…..but that’s another story). Nonetheless, his passing hit me pretty hard.
As a wannabe drummer in the mid 90s….well, never mind.
People I know who knew him, to one degree or another…well, by all accounts he was a great guy, who also had his share of demons. Let’s just leave it at that.
By the time most of you read this, your shock of his death will have worn off…presuming you had any shock at all to begin with. Mine won’t have. Dude was amazing.
I now regret terribly never having met him. And whatever it is that drove him to the (alleged) decision to end it all, I’m hopeful that death brought him some peace.
Something we all need sometimes…I guess. No matter the price.
But honestly, him being gone and Curt Schilling still being around….? Fuck off already, universe.
RIP, Chris. Maybe I’ll see ya on the other side, brother.
If that last one doesn’t give you goosebumps, you very well might have no soul. Just saying.
And if you feel like you need moar therapy, feel free to pop over to Rikki-Tikki-Deadly’s uplifting DFO Request Line from earlier today. If you don’t want to kill yourself yet, just give it time.
Yes, I realize that was terrible “too soon” humour. Don’t care.
–
So Some Sports Happened
NHL
So the Stanley Cup playoffs are still a thing even though I no longer have a horse in the race. Thanks, Caps. See ya’s in October I guess. In the West, the Ducks gritted one out last night in OT to knot that series up at 2 apiece. Meanwhile, in the East, the Pens have had their hands full with Ottawa and trail in that series 2 games to 1.
- Tonight: Game 4: Yinzburgh @ Ottawa, 8pm, NBCSN (OTT up 2-1)
NBA
Well dangit, I guess I really do need to address this thing they call baxsetballing. As I predicted some time ago, it’s down to Cleveland/Boston in the East, and Golden State/San Antonio in the West. I will not take credit for that prediction however, as even a retarded infant could have called that one correctly.
Still boring, but whatever….
- Tonight: Cleveland @ Boston, 8:30pm, TNT (CLE up 1-0)
MLB
Yeah, it’s still going on and it’s still boring as hell. And that’s coming from me, a yuuuuge baseball fan. Seriously, in spite of my Orioles overachieving majorly thus far, this season has sucked
HORSEYS!!!!!
The Preakness is tomorrow. It’s one of the few days of the year that Baltimore actually seems to have some culture, so yeah I’m telling you about it.
- Bad Bettor Advice: Don’t bet on Always Dreaming. Not gonna happen, folks. Sorry. If you must wager your hard earned money on animals which are stupid and weigh nearly a ton, put a C-note down on Classic Empire. You’ll probably still lose, bcuz stupid huge animals are huge and stupid….but you stand a better chance than if you go with the “favorite” here. Trust me.
–
So Who Is She?
Pardon me while I pull back the curtain. Oh shit wait, lemme pull up my pants first…..
Vanessa Huppenkothen
Great name right? And totally doesn’t even sound Mexican. That’s because her Papa wasn’t. He was a German footballer named Dieter. This is him….
Apparently she must have gotten her looks from Mom.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1cCgQKTn10
Born 24 July, 1985 (31 y.o.), Mexico City.
Model, sports reporter, actress (allegedly).
And totes devoted to balls’ happiness.
And also….she kinda perrty.
She is this week’s very, very special Princess. Treat her nicely.
And as always, enjoy…..
High heels on balls. Now if that’s not some sort of perfect symbolism, I dunno what is.
FWIW, I did reach out to balls for comment/reaction to this post:
balls:
tWBS: Seriously dude, Talk to me….you OK with this?
balls: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
balls was ummmm…….. unavailable for comment.
–
tWBS’ Shitty Photo of the Week
This one is only a coupla weeks old now. It was taken at Joshua Tree National Park in the company of ballsofsteelandfury, Low Commander of the Super Soldiers, and some really cool guy named Phil. It was a lot colder than it looks, FWIW. One of these days I’ll have to show you balls’ big blue arctic coat. Hell, it’s not like you can tell it’s him in there.
And I also ended up with a handful of cactus needles thru my shoe and into my foot in order to get this shot. So you better like it, lol…..
–
Time To Call It A Day I Guess
Yeah, lots of emotions this week. Meh. The best and only thing we can do is to be true to ourselves as we react to the world. Seriously, what else is there?
Be kind to one another.
And appreciate our foibles for what they are. When it comes down to it, our foibles are what make us who we are. And isn’t that kinda the whole point?
Demand the best for yourselves. No one is going to give you that if you don’t demand it. Trust me on this one….tWBS speaks from hard earned experience here.
Have a good weekend folks.
Love ya’s.
A “more” traditional version for reference…..
–
Cavs up FIFTY on the road and against the supposed #1 seed. Ridiculous. NBA needs to seriously consider significant format changes (like fewer regular season games or some sort of divisional/conference realignment).
Or uniformly enforcing rules?
That would help. I mean, I like basketball, I *want* to get into these playoffs, but when you have two teams that are just so head-and-shoulders above everyone else and their re-re-match has been a near-guarantee, it’s really hard to really follow with any sort of interest. That’s not good for the league.
And Jonesy is at the table now along with yours truly.
We’re like the two best people and you should all come talk to us and give us your money.
I make no promises as to our quality. Or lack thereof.
Well he might not but I will make all the false promises in the world if it gets a few more bodies to the table.
I may show up in a bit and lower quality substantially
Just saying…..this hockey game will be over in about a half hour, more or less….
My 7 card hole cards before I lose half my stack.
STUPID GAME
You had an off night. Buck up and tighten your vagina, Sir!!!!!!!
Damn it, Reds. You’re going to tease me into watching this game, are you?
Man, the collusion is getting out of hand
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6YRwN5oDaTg/VQ1GPXBxhhI/AAAAAAAAClk/61u3IiIPZ1c/s1600/803639_worst-book-covers-titles-5.jpg
Tebow’s baseball career is pretty much going as expected.
http://www.cbssports.com/mlb/news/behold-the-tale-of-a-fan-who-says-an-errant-tebow-throw-konked-him-in-the-biscuits/
His bruised beans are HOLY now!!111
With the week we’ve had…
https://youtube.com/watch?v=2dy7Cg36qfY
Can we just abolish the Eastern Conference in the NBA for the next 3-5 years at this point?
Can we just abolish the NBA?
FTFY
I’m not saying this girl knows Hippo, but I’m not NOT saying it either….
http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/a8/a829cccf0d4d9fd4ff8c20e0050f59ba6465c997e6ec9674adba52fda5223165.jpg
hee hee, if only I were that interesting
She is pretty fucking cute.
Worth the risk, IMHO.
Photographer: So ummmm…..yeah, smile….I guess.
http://ppcorn.com/us/wp-content/uploads/sites/14/2015/08/naked-family-ppcorn.jpg
If that Photographer didn’t call the cops, I think that makes him an accessory after the fact.
NEVAR enough
/where ARE u, li’l dragon??
[swallows a Tylenol 3 or 2]
Yeah, I’m high.
Unfortunately no. Once again my connection is…..lacking.
http://pixel.nymag.com/imgs/fashion/daily/2013/03/27/27-kylie-gillies.o.jpg/a_4x.jpg
Don’t feed her or she’ll never go away.
Wait…..
Yes, feed her.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofmDFkcwXxA&t
solid choice. Worthy of the Cornell remembrance thread!
Great underpants?
Or best underpants ever?
Discuss…..
I could get behind this argument
The comeback has begun, Canadia!!!!!!
You can post a thousand more pics of chicks but this is the sexiest you’ll ever get.
this one also pretty HAWT
Mein. Gott.
u can see why the angels done kissed her so many times ,, smh
The one thing you can always not count on is the Ottawa crowd giving the Senators loud verbal support when the team is behind.
Someone should tell the Senators that their goals from last game DONT carry over to this one. They actually have to keep scoring if they want to win.
Better?
25% better.
you mean it’s not a 2-legged Champions League tie??
Series tied 2-2.
FUCK!
My Canadia in 5 predict looks bad now. GO SHAME THEM!!
Trust me, they’ve been properly shamed in the hallways of my mind.
“You let down teh Mounties and our precious, precious syrup!!”
(Ottawa crowd is reminded that they should maybe cheer for the team that they paid good money to watch, maybe)
“Go Sens Go?” /sorta
SHOULDERS HUZZAH!!
shoulders ‘n sweaters indeed combo well
Penguins goalie Matt Murray is from Thunder Bay, Ontario. Girlfriend from high school is from Thunder Bay-coincidence? Yes, of course.
/Why would you think otherwise? Sheesh!
painful, eh? You should have stopped at 3 Wednesday night. Twas pyrrhic.
Something something her five hole is open something something
/sandwich for show, photographed subject did NAWT actually bite it (obvs)
Pedantic ruination…..
She is sharing OBVIOUSLY. Plus when she stole it she got some on her fingers; WOULD NOT BANG.
Provide proof of person she is “obviously” sharing with.
/yeah, I didn’t think so
//struts
Well, the fantasy of the photo it would be ME. The intent is to create that fantasy…….
Well until Hippo kilt the boner.
ur welcome!!
h
ttps://68.media.tumblr.com/c14a4ab9119971fbbd0b8369e3888057/tumblr_np4ruh5Pg41r8hkf5o1_500.jpg
worth the extra effort!
Sandwich bite same size as MY mouth.
She shared just fine.
And that’s not mayo on her finger.
Just saying.
I shoulda saw that joke…… coming.
Joke?
Coming?
Also interesting, perhaps this is just my level of self-hatred talking, I NEVAR involve mahself in these fantasies. Or my rational brain just can’t be overridden and will always know better and goes “fuck off, loser!!”
Anyway, I have always preferred dick-free sapphic material. I don’t need a Hippo part written into the screenplay.
Ummmmmmmmmm…..
M’kay.
Tonite seems to be ready to go off the rails. I’m all for this, incidentally.
Also perhaps I am an emotionally distant sociopath? This may or may not have been alleged/strongly intimated by an ex-wife during the j’accuse!! phase.
Hehe….don’t get me started on the whole ex ” J’accuse!!!!” thing. I’m more interested in your lesbo porn fantasies.
Allegedly.
uh, just when Hippo meets the acquaintance of, say, “Georgia Jones” is it always her dalliances with the fairer sex I am interested in.
That is all. Nothing WEIRD.
Yeah, bcuz we’d all hate it if it was weird.
http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/2147098/82421830.jpg
1-0, done The Cardinal Way!!
well, actually, the proper way is to use a larger pot…
You said Cardinal way.
(the smug “well, actually” is the self-effacing “Cardinal Way” joke)
I WAS TRYING TO PUSH YOUR JOKE TO THE STOVE…. DIDN’T WORK…. WELL IT MAY WORK AT THE END OF THEIR SEASON.
typing skills ….
didn’t mean to yell.
no worries, I do not take comedic hints well. 😀
We can revisit at the end of the season…. heheheh.
/see commentary below
Don’t mind me, just another cat…..
http://i258.photobucket.com/albums/hh253/jimifunguzz/raccoon-steals-cat-food.gif
All I hear is “SMOKEBOMB!”
Those are some pacifist cats right there I tell you what.
All those folks out there complaining about movie re-boots-
Nietzsche explained it some time ago-given that there is no capital “G” god, time is not linear, it’s circular. Everything is repeated-over and over again.
/not bad for a guy that died of syphilis
People still care about movies, eh?
/That’s how you be a smug hipster asshole
Inorite?????
http://www.theplaidzebra.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/5_1920s-gangster.jpg
THE MALTESE FALCON
1930: Published as a book
1931: Made into a movie
1936: Re-made into a movie (Satan Met A Lady)
1941: Re-made by John Huston into the definitive movie version
http://cdn4.artofthetitle.com/assets/sm/upload/s3/rq/qz/y0/mf_c.jpg
Moose, you are en fuego tonight.
My erection salutes you, Sir.
Wait…..
That’s okay; just point it towards the window of the bus.
Well that’s not as much fun, but OK.
ppl complain about body shaming but POINTY-SOULDERED THIN GALS FOOKIN’ RULE
http://blog.onlinemetals.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/spacex-merlin-rocket.jpg
RTD: [turns on basketball game]
BOSTON CELTICS: [give up 10 straight points]
RTD: [turns off basketball game]
And that will be the most competitive point of the rest of this series!
It would be funny if the Cavaliers just put all five defenders in the paint the whole first half to see if Boston can make ANY wide open threes.
Wow.
That is all.
https://www.reddit.com/r/CarolineVreeland/
Bananacakes!!!
I left the house for an hour so I wouldn’t eat in front of the kid who is limited to oatmeal and such (wisdom teeth). There are bugeyed Yinzers here. I blame myself.
Damn it, Hippo!
/that said, it probably isn’t your fault
Well check out the yinzers.
Dey ain’t ded yet.
Kinda. Yes.
😉
I think she’s talking to the Pen’s……..
Just my luck. Oh well, maybe I’ll get a massage instead.
http://www.cutecatgifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/157039.gif
Uninvited pussy is the worstest pussy.