Sooooooooooooooo…..
ISoG came to a rather inauspicious end this week. And yet you still have to hear about it, apparently. Yes, I’m a dick.
tWBS (to New Girl): Soooooo, ummmmm, Van….
New Girl: Look, just cut to the chase. I’m not some wilting flower you need to treat gently. Don’t try to schmooze me. Just tell me. The past week has already been a fucking nightmare.
So who is New Girl? Who is “Van….”?
Is she just some fantasy girl we referred to but never actually sprung on ya’s? Sort of I guess. But like Leticia, she was based in fact. And if we do continue the saga in the future, you’ll get to know her more. More or less, she is/was my idea of ballsofsteelandfury’s perfect woman. His perfect match, more or less (translation: The only woman I thought would put up with him).
But who is she based upon? Oh wouldn’t you like to know?????
Give it time, you’ll find out in just a little while.
–
Chris Cornell
When I started writing this post, Chris Cornell was still alive. Now he’s not.
As some of you no doubt recall, a few days ago we had a “discussion” about the pitfalls of meeting our “heroes”. I don’t use that word, FWIW. But I do admire people who are creative and enrich my life, tho. Over the years, I’ve had occasion to meet several of my “heroes”. More often than not, they’ve turned out to be great people.
But I never had occasion to meet Chris Cornell (came close once, but it was an odd night and a lot of shit happened…..but that’s another story). Nonetheless, his passing hit me pretty hard.
As a wannabe drummer in the mid 90s….well, never mind.
People I know who knew him, to one degree or another…well, by all accounts he was a great guy, who also had his share of demons. Let’s just leave it at that.
By the time most of you read this, your shock of his death will have worn off…presuming you had any shock at all to begin with. Mine won’t have. Dude was amazing.
I now regret terribly never having met him. And whatever it is that drove him to the (alleged) decision to end it all, I’m hopeful that death brought him some peace.
Something we all need sometimes…I guess. No matter the price.
But honestly, him being gone and Curt Schilling still being around….? Fuck off already, universe.
RIP, Chris. Maybe I’ll see ya on the other side, brother.
If that last one doesn’t give you goosebumps, you very well might have no soul. Just saying.
And if you feel like you need moar therapy, feel free to pop over to Rikki-Tikki-Deadly’s uplifting DFO Request Line from earlier today. If you don’t want to kill yourself yet, just give it time.
Yes, I realize that was terrible “too soon” humour. Don’t care.
–
So Some Sports Happened
NHL
So the Stanley Cup playoffs are still a thing even though I no longer have a horse in the race. Thanks, Caps. See ya’s in October I guess. In the West, the Ducks gritted one out last night in OT to knot that series up at 2 apiece. Meanwhile, in the East, the Pens have had their hands full with Ottawa and trail in that series 2 games to 1.
- Tonight: Game 4: Yinzburgh @ Ottawa, 8pm, NBCSN (OTT up 2-1)
NBA
Well dangit, I guess I really do need to address this thing they call baxsetballing. As I predicted some time ago, it’s down to Cleveland/Boston in the East, and Golden State/San Antonio in the West. I will not take credit for that prediction however, as even a retarded infant could have called that one correctly.
Still boring, but whatever….
- Tonight: Cleveland @ Boston, 8:30pm, TNT (CLE up 1-0)
MLB
Yeah, it’s still going on and it’s still boring as hell. And that’s coming from me, a yuuuuge baseball fan. Seriously, in spite of my Orioles overachieving majorly thus far, this season has sucked
HORSEYS!!!!!
The Preakness is tomorrow. It’s one of the few days of the year that Baltimore actually seems to have some culture, so yeah I’m telling you about it.
- Bad Bettor Advice: Don’t bet on Always Dreaming. Not gonna happen, folks. Sorry. If you must wager your hard earned money on animals which are stupid and weigh nearly a ton, put a C-note down on Classic Empire. You’ll probably still lose, bcuz stupid huge animals are huge and stupid….but you stand a better chance than if you go with the “favorite” here. Trust me.
–
So Who Is She?
Pardon me while I pull back the curtain. Oh shit wait, lemme pull up my pants first…..
Vanessa Huppenkothen
Great name right? And totally doesn’t even sound Mexican. That’s because her Papa wasn’t. He was a German footballer named Dieter. This is him….
Apparently she must have gotten her looks from Mom.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1cCgQKTn10
Born 24 July, 1985 (31 y.o.), Mexico City.
Model, sports reporter, actress (allegedly).
And totes devoted to balls’ happiness.
And also….she kinda perrty.
She is this week’s very, very special Princess. Treat her nicely.
And as always, enjoy…..
High heels on balls. Now if that’s not some sort of perfect symbolism, I dunno what is.
FWIW, I did reach out to balls for comment/reaction to this post:
balls:
tWBS: Seriously dude, Talk to me….you OK with this?
balls: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
balls was ummmm…….. unavailable for comment.
–
tWBS’ Shitty Photo of the Week
This one is only a coupla weeks old now. It was taken at Joshua Tree National Park in the company of ballsofsteelandfury, Low Commander of the Super Soldiers, and some really cool guy named Phil. It was a lot colder than it looks, FWIW. One of these days I’ll have to show you balls’ big blue arctic coat. Hell, it’s not like you can tell it’s him in there.
And I also ended up with a handful of cactus needles thru my shoe and into my foot in order to get this shot. So you better like it, lol…..
–
Time To Call It A Day I Guess
Yeah, lots of emotions this week. Meh. The best and only thing we can do is to be true to ourselves as we react to the world. Seriously, what else is there?
Be kind to one another.
And appreciate our foibles for what they are. When it comes down to it, our foibles are what make us who we are. And isn’t that kinda the whole point?
Demand the best for yourselves. No one is going to give you that if you don’t demand it. Trust me on this one….tWBS speaks from hard earned experience here.
Have a good weekend folks.
Love ya’s.
A “more” traditional version for reference…..
–
chillingly accurate.
https://theconcourse.deadspin.com/1795370233
Hermana Weaselo appreciated it for her graduation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Heygg3esSg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yg7GfJuiUwM&list=RDyg7GfJuiUwM#t=185
That is an ornate joke.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMwyR7MUhqk
She seems friendly.
Damn
The actress who plays Salma Hayek’s character in From Dusk Til Dawn in the Netflix series.
Cuban. Cute titties.
https://imgur.com/NLVHdmQ
Mexican-American
*swoon*
https://gfycat.com/SparseGlitteringAlleycat
Bella Thorne is ricockulous.
https://gfycat.com/RegularHarshFoxterrier
Sorry, but I just can’t get with the nose ring thing. Does nothing for me whatsoever.
What nose ring?
Ah, Mexicans.
https://gfycat.com/OddballInsistentHydatidtapeworm
Ok, now the bottom one is unreal.
To be fair, she was playing an immortal being (the muse Serendipity) in Dogma.
I should write up this proposal I have rattling around in my head before the deadline so I can, you know, get paid to do something. Something I actually like doing, to boot.
Me too, I’d love to get paid to masturbate while watching Telemundo weather girls.
Exactly…
Wood working now has two meanings:
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-01/15/15/enhanced/webdr05/enhanced-7081-1421354388-22.jpg
You probably want to put on two layers of lacquer finish after giving it a very thorough sanding with a fine grit paper.
Two layers.
Good Lord!
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-01/15/14/enhanced/webdr04/enhanced-30866-1421350004-1.jpg
http://0.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/23/26/8d9e88e7562d9e7490c5c20f1ebf0916-if-god-loves-me-why-cant-i-get-my-locker-open.jpg
He loves you, but He doesn’t like you.
But I’m in a strange Moose-ish mood:
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-01/15/13/enhanced/webdr05/enhanced-18772-1421347639-8.jpg
[Insert generic Chinese food joke here]
Evening (or morning) all. Just got home from a mind-numbing boring day of work. Love teh sexay!
http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2015-01/15/13/enhanced/webdr04/enhanced-10702-1421346990-1.jpg
It’s better in the original German
Brockmire is pretty damn funny.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHVBzLGAIbU
Evening commentists. How are we?
Could be worse!
Okay. You?
Sleep deprivation is real man. In no way will I ever consider being a member of the French Foreign Legion.
There’s a Spanish Foreign Legion, too. I assume they get siestas.
Meh
Damn.
I wish she had gotten naked closer to when she was in Lost In Translation, or at least before she lost weight and bulked up to play a superhero.
https://pixxxels.org/image/e5g3coqbp/
https://gfycat.com/HugeFastItaliangreyhound
In a perfect world, circa The Perfect Score.
Didn’t she do that before Lost in Translation? It was just released afterwards because it’d been shelved until Lost made her famous.
I stand by my appreciation of her being pegged to that movie.
Dirty Bella. https://gfycat.com/AbsoluteZanyIcelandichorse
Gfycat has the funniest link names.
Adjective + Adjective + Animal
I think I may have talked myself out of a job again.
My boss and his boss sat me down to ask my thoughts on the leadership and customer support training that I got on Weds and Thurs…specifically “JSD…how would you change our company”
“Well Tom…let me answer that question with another question…how are you going to spend your power ball winnings?”
“I am not sure what you mean…”
“Well asking me how I would change things without giving me any authority, time, or budget to implement changes makes about as much sense as me asking you how you are spending your lottery winnings that you don’t have. So Tom…how…are…you…spending…your…lottery winnings”
The meeting was slated to go 2 hours. It went 20 minutes of awkward silence.
Anyone need to hire an engineer that has experience commissioning low and medium voltage drives? I can also install medium voltage motors and repair turbines.
I’ve been violently drinking in random parks and gas station parking lots since about 5 pm today.
Getting back to my roots I guess. Real glad I just bought a house.
I kind of forgot how strong malted beverages are…
How are your Doomsday Device-building skills?
I once made a high velocity electroplating machine.
Fucking thing could actually lead to game changing technologies. Its currently sitting in a lab, completely unused, because my university put a patent on it and doesn’t want to release further resources on it.
Dark little secret about academia….athletes aren’t the only ones being completely exploited.
Oh, I’m well aware. I hope the whole world burns.
Sorry to hear about your job. My job is something similar. So many people are quitting, I’m starting to feel like I’m on the Titanic.
When in doubt, just do your job the best you can. If you’re good; either they’ll keep you or you’ll be set for your next job.
They ain’t really firing me. Its not like they can find another engineer that can talk for 8 hours straight about equipment.
Most engineers can’t talk for 15 minutes.
I think I could lose my pants and huff paint for 3 hours in the office and HR would just sit me down as ask me to see more shrinks…
But you’re not getting promoted?
Hey
ROCKNROLL
I think she got new boobs post-divorce. I also fail to see why she deleted the second photo from her IG.
http://fizstar.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/beckinsale01.jpg
http://www.hawtcelebs.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/kate-beckinsale-on-a-hummer-05-12-2017-instagram-picture_1.jpg
Token black woman on Fox News. Still hot as fuck.
I must concur. Yowza.
I think this is MILF era Adriana.
Supposedly a singer. Couldn’t care less if she doesn’t even have a voice box.
The term “singer” should be used loosely.
But she is fun to look at.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S97MaG3kOMY
Megan Fox just turned 31. Old bitch.
31. Still just a kid.
Emily, front and back
holy shit, the Rockies are 11 over .500
Hey, at least the Celtics kept it under 50, right?
It’s amazing what the right bra can do.
Gallery of Mary Elizabeth Winstead ass gifs from this week’s Fargo.
http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/jivki51g9sfx6rg7tmvlc7ffk4ht7c9q
she’s a mighty fetching young lady
Indeed
Lynda Carter nipples https://gfycat.com/ThoughtfulMatureCattle
Hello.
Yinzers no canz cownt?
You would think that wud happen to a Southern team
WCS just took his first breath in the last half hour.
Scotchy, u believe??
This is why I’ve been far more interested and excited by the NHL playoffs. It’s just so wild and unpredictable. You think just about any of the 16 teams in could win it all (Though I’d like to see a reduction of games in their regular season too).
PIT/CAN is one interesting as fuck series, for sure. and yeah, every series/game seems a complete wild card.
Pitt just has to play a good game to win. Sens just have to play a perfect game to win. The Sens coach is much better at implementing the game plan than his counterpart.
/yeah, I believe