Sunday Gravy with yeah right: Season Finale – WINGS!

Good morning folks!

We did it! We fucking did it! The NFL season is finally here and we made it through the interminable, arduous, ungodly offseason.

Hot damn!

While of course this means we’ve got hot, sexy NFL action every weekend for the next 5 months or so it also means I can drag my ass out of the kitchen, grab some beers and fuck off with the rest of yez!

That’s right, it’s the season finale of Sunday Gravy!

For those of you new folks, Sunday Gravy along with Request Line and DFO Radio are offseason features that run during the, well, the fucking offseason. These features will be placed on hiatus until after the Superb Owl when they will return to their regularly scheduled time. Try not to shed a tear but I need a fucking break over here.

It’s been one hell of a season this year, my 3rd doing Sunday Gravy. We started off around Christmas time with prime rib and Yorkshire pudding, plowed through Jersey with porkroll egg and cheese, we made chowdah and lentil soup, chicken chili, meatballs, shrimp and grits, homemade pizza with homemade Italian sausage, homemade fettucine alfredo, Irish stew, beef stroganoff, scratch-made chicken parm, (takes deep breath) chicken shawarma, braised ribs and gratin potatoes, kung pao chicken with beef and broccoli, grillades and grits, hotdish, egg salad, scratch made ravioli with 2 sauces, a motherfucking bahn mi!, jagerschnitzel and spaetzle, scratch made burgers with our own ground beef and homemade buns, we studied the burrito in various incarnations and did a Mexican street corn, we had chicken pot pie, orange chicken and fried rice, chicken marsala and grilled pesto pork chops. And that’s just THIS SEASON!

Mother. Fucker.

I ain’t gonna link to all of those recipes but you can find my archives here.

See? I need a rest.

The things I’m most proud of from our offseason together are definitely my fresh pasta (I’m a goddamn pasta making machine) my homemade bread is spot on and competition ready and I’ve really been able to integrate the Americanized/Chinese food profiles to a high degree.

I would have never done these things or probably even tried them without writing Sunday Gravy.

So, thank you. Both for reading and for being the inspiration for me to cook new things.

As payment for you wonderful folks who read these on a regular basis I’m giving a perfect present to take with you during this upcoming NFL Season. I’m giving you WINGS! Four ways!

Who doesn’t love wings? Un-American heathen bastards that’s who! Like them bone-in or boneless? Doesn’t matter we’re doing both. Fried or baked? Doesn’t matter we’re doing both. Traditional Buffalo style? Right here! Spicy Asian style wings? Oh yeah. Teriyaki wings? Fuck yes we are. Garlic parmesan wings. Goddamn right!

No single food item says football like the humble chicken wing. According to the National Chicken Council (?) Americans consumed 1.33 BILLION wings for the Superb Owl last year. Enough wings that laid end to end would circle the Earth 3 fucking times!

Jesus Christ that’s a lot of goddamn wings. How we have avoided a complete chicken genocide I have no fucking clue.

What say we add to the wholesale chicken slaughter yes?

Let’s!

Got a lot of shit to cover today so let’s take it from the top.

Blue Cheese dipping glop!

You are gonna love this shit. I think it may have been the highlight of the entire meal.

Gorgonzola cheese – how much depends on how many wings you’re making I used about 4 ounces.

Mayo – equal amount to the gorgonzola.

1 clove of garlic minced.

Juice from 1/2 lime

Salt and pepper to taste.

If you haven’t worked with gorgonzola before it’s got a funky rind to it. It’s chewy and not exactly pleasant to eat so I trimmed the rind away from the cheese. Add in the mayo and mix until smooth. If you want to put a tablespoon of sour cream in here that would work too. Next add in the minced garlic and the squeeze of lime. Finally salt and pepper to taste. I had some of this leftover after the wing extravaganza and it was so goddamn delicious I was just spreading it on a cracker.

If you are more familiar with a Danish Blue that would work too but I really like the depth of the gorgonzola for this application.

Let’s talk about the wings for a moment.

I just fucking love a good fried chicken wing. I mean like “fried chicken” fried chicken wings. Delightful. Then again we can’t eat fried foods on a regular basis. Trust me you youngsters, you just can’t. Your doctor will tell you why eventually. You can make a fantastic chicken wing by baking them too. I’m not talking about soggy ass wings either. I’m talking crispy, crunchy baked wings. It can be done!

Wings!

I prep my wings the same way for frying as I do for baking. This technique works for either.

Bone-in wings – I’ll get to boneless in a bit – however many you feel like devouring.

1/2 cup of flour

1 teaspoon salt.

1 teaspoon black pepper

1/2 teaspoon of cayenne.

Mix everything together.

Take the wings out of the packaging and using paper towels squeeze/dry them as much as you can. Removing the moisture makes for a crispier wing. Dredge the wings in the seasoned flour until they’re evenly coated and place on a foil-lined baking sheet.

Here’s the trick, especially if you’re baking the wings, put the floured wings into the refrigerator for at least an hour, preferably two or even overnight. This allows the seasoned flour to firmly coat the wings prior to cooking.

If you’re baking these pre-heat the oven to 425. Cook for 25 minutes then flip each wing over, rotate the pan and cook for 20 minutes more. That’s 45 minutes of cooking time. When done, toss with sauce of choice.

If you’e frying these, get a deep pot or Dutch oven on a medium-high heat and add enough oil to almost but not quite cover the wings.

Cook for 5 minutes, flip the wings over, cook for 5 more minutes, flip again and then 5 more minutes or until the wings are golden brown, delicious and cooked through.

Hell yes you could eat the fuck out of these wings like they’re fried chicken – because they are fried chicken wings. We’re just going to toss them in our sauce selection today.

Boneless wings!

2-3 pounds of boneless/skinless chicken breasts cut into nuggets.

1/4 to 1/2 cup of cornstarch

Salt and pepper to taste.

I’m preparing the boneless nuggets differently since they are less fatty and we want to season them more directly. I also am using cornstarch instead of flour so we don’t have too much breading to nugget ratio. This is another technique I learned when preparing the Chinese style chicken recipes mentioned before. Cornstarch makes a badass dredge and lets more of the chicken flavor come through.

I’m only going to be frying the boneless wings not baking.

Season the chicken nuggets with salt and pepper prior to dredging in the cornstarch. Get them nice and coated.

Get some oil going in a pan and let’s get to cooking these up.

Four minutes then flip the chicken over. Four more minutes and they’re done. If working in batches you can keep these warm in a 225 degree oven until everything has been cooked.

Now you may be asking, “Were you really cooking all of these at the same time?”

Fuck yes I was! Bone-in wings are on the left, boneless on the right. I wasn’t able to do the “Keep nuggets warm in the 225 degree oven” thing because I was also baking wings but they held up just fine.

You can eat all of this lovely chicken in any form you want. Dip the nuggets in barbecue sauce? Damn strait! Whatever you want. I’m going to show you a few sauce ideas for these.

Traditional Buffalo wing sauce:

You know this one already. It’s equal parts melted butter – some use margarine but I’m not one of those – and equal parts Frank’s original hot sauce. That’s it. I did fuck around with my sauce by adding a bigass scoop of my chili tepin to the butter and Frank’s mix just to level up the heat. I’ve also put a couple of shots of sriracha in there with outstanding results. Do as you will.

The Teriyaki sauce is my brother DJ Taj’s recipe. He’s made it for over 30 years. It’s a witches brew of soy sauce, pineapple juice, dried cherries, garlic and ginger. He cooks and reduces it by half and then stores the sauce in the fridge. It has a shelf life of for-fucking-ever and he had some in the refrigerator for today’s application. Wish I could be a bit more specific but that’s the best I could do.

Garlic Parmesan Sauce:

1/4 cup of melted butter

1 clove of minced garlic

2 tablespoons of freshly grated parmesan. In this case since it’s a sauce and if you want to use the dried parmesan that you have on hand from previous pizza deliveries you can. JUST THIS ONCE! Of course I used freshly grated.

In a small sauce pan melt the butter over a low heat then add in the garlic. Saute on low for about 5 minutes or until the garlic smell is driving you to the brink of insanity. Then add in half of the parmesan and mix together. The other half of the parmesan is sprinkled over the top of the wings after they have been tossed to coat in the sauce. Garnish with parsley and serve.

Spicy Asian Wing Sauce!

This one is a yeah right original. Basically I still had a lot of Asian sauce elements on hand and I decided to make a sauce out of them. I’ll try to remember what ever the fuck I put in there.

2 tablespoons of soy sauce.

1/4 cup of honey.

Juice from one lime.

1 tablespoon of fresh grated ginger.

2 cloves of minced garlic

1 teaspoon of sesame oil

1 teaspoon of rice wine vinegar or sake

2 tablespoons of hoisen

1 tablespoon of fish sauce

1/2 teaspoon of oregano.

Some grinds of Szechuan pepper.

1 heaping tablespoon of chili garlic sauce.

Put all ingredients in a bowl and stir to mix. This can be made a day in advance to allow the flavors to get mingled.

Not familiar with garlic chili sauce?

Here you go.

It’s very similar to sambal oelek. The picture may look familiar because the garlic chili sauce I used is made by Huey Fong foods. Yep, the same fuckers that make sriracha. I love this stuff. So good. Great to dip an egg roll into.

To make the Asian style wings get a bowl, toss your cooked wings or nuggets in the sauce to coat and garnish with either parsley, chopped green onion or even toasted sesame seeds. Serve.

Let’s take a look at the finished items. First, again, the bone-in wings.

Clockwise from top that’s the traditional Buffalo style, the teriyaki wings, the garlic parmesan wings followed by the spicy Asian wings.

Now here are the boneless wing nuggets.

And that is clockwise from the top the teriyaki nuggets, then the garlic parmesan, the traditional buffalo and the Asian nuggets in the center.

And here is exactly what was left.

Take these recipes and run with them. Tinker around, add more heat, add your own tricks and gimmicks. I don’t even have to give a flavor breakdown of these because everybody knows that wings are goddamn delicious.

So there we have it. Another season in the books. Thanks for reading folks. I really do this out of love for the readers and our fair site here. As much as I love to cook – and I do love to cook – I also have a love for football. If I happen to get inspired during the Vikings bye week I may drop a random recipe in here. Otherwise I will see you folks after the season.

May your team stay healthy, may you dominate in your fantasy league and may you cover the spread on every bet.

PEACE!

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yeah right is a lifelong Vikings fan. He is into self denial and still harbors hope. Loves to cook, read and drink. But he doesn't plate.
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[…] Remember last year? […]

JerBear50

I think Dan Halen solved our chicken wing problem.
comment image

Romonobyl

Thanks for the ride, gonna miss ya till the off-season!

Redshirt

Watching “The Rock” and pretending that the ex-spy Sean Connery is playing is an old, disgrunted James Bond makes the movie so much better.

CBQUE

HOW THE FUCK WE DOIN BOYS????!!!! Been a while but good to see the same crew is still around. Looking forward to kicking it with you again this year. That is if I decide to watch. The Rog, Kap & the other bullshit has soured me on this product. I’ll give in probably since Directv has already stolen some of my money. Talk to you all soon. Fuck you Goodell

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m in the same boat, except I stopped giving $ to Directv/NFL.

Can’t beat the dick jokes, though…

Wakezilla

You can beat the dick jokes, bit it’ll get messy after awhile.

Redshirt

Welcome back, CBQUE! I watch for my team and because its the only thing on.

All the other aforementioned bullshit can sit on it and rotate.

King Hippo

One thing fo’ sho, God/the universe has a great fucking sense of humour. I guess, how could a deity not?

Redshirt

If God didn’t have a sense of humor, we would’ve been wrathed a dozen times by now.

Wakezilla

You know what’s bullshit? My boy, Biggie (Adam Bighill), got cut, despite leading the Saints in tackles and had 1 interception in the preseason.

He made their practice roster, but from what I read and heard, he out performed Teo and the other linebacker they brought in

Wakezilla

Sadly, as “progressive” as the NFL has gotten, it still chooses pedigree and size over merit. What an absolute joke. Biggie should have made the team

King Hippo

See also Lobster, Brock. Godfuckingdamnit

Redshirt

See also Jones, Pacman. Adam must have pictures of Lewis and Brown pushing that kid into Harambe’s pit or something.

...

It’s amazing that usually temperate West Coast is being destroyed with heat right now while the Midwest is about 5-10 degrees below average. August days almost always topped out in the high 70’s, which is the sort of weather people flee to the West Coast for.

blaxabbath

Global warming.

theeWeeBabySeamus

It’s been unseasonably cool here for the past week or so.
Feels like October. And I freaking love it.

Wakezilla

It’s not as hot here, but we’re getting DP’d with smoke from interior BC and now from Washington. So it’s hot and muggy and really uncomfortable and the air quality is trash

King Hippo

imagine you had a South Carolina below ya, who believes it to be their Jeebus-given right to burn they trash, leaves, old tires, dead babies, etc.

King Hippo

this really is the 2nd temperate summer in a row FOAR North Cakalaky (relatively speaking). It’s TOTES gonna hit 130 next year.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Nicely done as always.
Now I’m hungry.

Roasting a turkey today.
Shockingly, there are unwelcome family members showing up…as they often do on the weekends.
Thanksgiving in September is what it’s turned into.

Fucker better have my weed when he gets here tho, or he gets no turkey. Dammit.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m happy to report that my nephew-in-law shall have all the turkey he desires.
And later, I’ll be roasted too.
Woo Hoo.

Here’s to 6 weeks weed free, and all the irreparable harm that it’s caused me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XB8rRUUjP4g

blaxabbath

Jack Torrence’s….well, everything — from hand gestures to speech pattern to victim mentality — when he is talking to Lloyd is eerily Trumpian.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ditto with the Delbert Grady bathroom scene.

Senor Weaselo

When you’re the caretaker, they let you get away with killing your wife!

...

I like how that terrible movie Passengers just ripped off the look of this scene but with a robot bartender.

Spanky Datass

Hell yes I’m making wings … next week, when it’s cooler. Great job.
But seriously I killed it on the grill last night (Damn it was hot!) and will have leftovers for a good while.

Spanky Datass

Also, I ordered some Szchuan peppercorns and have a dedicated mill full of the stuff sitting on the kitchen counter. Good suggestion!

Spanky Datass

I ground some on flank steak (pre-grill) and into the warm zucchini salad that went over the steak. Just perfect!

King Hippo

Query FOAR the peoples. In a 10-team, 20-man auction, does one think I need to open the bidding (I’m an asshole, so I always lead with a random player, not a star like everyone else) on Jacoby Brissett at $2 rather than $1?

Brocky

Any psychological edge you can gain, do it.

I’m always tell people they take too many players at one position too early

King Hippo

Do I tip my hand that I actually want him by going $2? I wouldn’t actually go to $4, though. I might go $3, but would be mad about it.

At 10 teams, methinks I am likely to sneak him through at $1. More likely to look like I am just being an NC State homer (as usual). Best available black, bearded NC State QB (wait for the Russell Wilson joke), yada, yada.

Thing is, and I read something on Rotowire this am to back this suspicion up – I don’t think White HODOR! plays ALL SEASON.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I don’t know shit about shit when it comes to this stuff (yesterday’s draft…exhibit A).
But I’d think Brissett would be an under the radar guy. Even with the Non-Luck development.

Re: Auctions in general….always best to let others set the tone then react appropriately. If nobody wants him, you get him cheap. If they raise the bidding above your limit, walk away.

theeWeeBabySeamus

20-man auction

“You have my attention”
— A. Rodgers

Senor Weaselo

“You also have mine.” -J. Richardson

blaxabbath

I watched the clip of the blind USC long snapper getting in the game yesterday and it included a post game interview with the player. The news guy was like, “What did it mean to you to play on the field for USC?” and the long snapper starts his response with, “Well, when you look at my situation…”

That was all I could take.

Brocky

Almost every single person I’ve met with a disability has a sense of humor about it.

Knew a kid in a motorized wheelchair in school, not mentally handicapped in any ways, just physically. Constantly threatened to run people’s feet over.

Dad worked with a guy called lefty, cuz he was missing his right hand from an auto accident. Constantly made “need another hand” jokes

And of course, to quote another friend:

You never realize how often guys talk about their balls until you have testicular cancer.

We call that friend one ball

King Hippo

HOLY FUCKBALLS, do them Asian wings look delish.

/sorry, Coach Parcells

Brocky

There is a special place in hell for people who say they’re quitting a fantasy league the day of its draft

Brocky

Also, on the subject of wings:

There’s a hooters being built in my city, if nothing else, I hope it makes the other wing joint, the one that was once good but now is crappy, awesome again

Senor Weaselo

I need to go to a Hooters but actually for the wings. But I haven’t heard great things.

/I would go for just wing research, let’s be real here.

Wakezilla

You really do go for the food. Even in a vain city like Vancouver, the ladies that tend to work there are more akin to the B Squad of a strip joint during a Sunday brunch

ballsofsteelandfury

Remember boys, the progression is:

Hooters waitress
Strip Club waitress
Strip Club day shift
Strip Club night shift
Cam girl
Porn star

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Who the hell does that?

Brocky

Packers fans

Don T

Yes to all.
/bookmarked

Senor Weaselo

I’ll need to try all the ways. Except you know, with the Buffalo ramp it up a little. Thank you, sir.

ballsofsteelandfury

“Dammit, Weaselo!!!”

– Weaselo’s intestinal tract

JerBear50

“Thanks, Weaselo!”

– Weaselo’s doctor

litre_cola

I like spicy food but not on your level Senor

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I know you’re trying to inspire us to cook, but every week it just makes me wish I could afford to hire you to cook for me. Damn I’m hungry now.

Unsurprised

WINGS!?!?!

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I am grinning from ear to ear over this gif. I love it.

Unsurprised

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blaxabbath

Peace out!

ballsofsteelandfury

Too hot to sleep in AZ too, huh?

ballsofsteelandfury

I think the biggest testament to your dedication to this column and to your readers is that you used the fucking oven while it was hot as fuck in LA.

THAT’S DEDICATION! Bravo, good sir, bravo!

Wakezilla

I need to buy an AC next year. We did all our cooking late at night