Your “Well, Well, Well…” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

NFL News: On-field issues

  • Adrian Peterson – now a Cardinal
    • The Saints received an undisclosed (late-round) pick in exchange.
    • CJ2K is now out, released by the Cards after the Peterson trade was finalized.
  • Steve Smith thinks Mike Glennon was set up to fail, based on last night’s play-calling in the Bears defeat.

  • Don’t get excited: Tom Brady has a sprained AC joint in his non-throwing shoulder.
    • He’s not expected to miss any time.
    • Perhaps it came from one of these:

  • FLORIDA MAN & FOOTBALL FAN!
    • A Vero Beach, FL man was taken to hospital with second- & third-degree burn to his upper body when, in fulfilling a bet, he set fire to his Cowboys jersey after they lost to the Packers.
      • the “admittedly drunk” man only injured himself when he tried to put the burning jersey back on after setting it alight.

NFL News: Red Scare 2017

  • It looks like the billionaires don’t want to mess with 45, despite his (again) appalling ignorance of the issues.
    • Trump wants to eliminate NFL tax breaks, despite the fact that the NFL gave up its tax-exempt status in 2015.
      • To quote CBS:
        • It’s possible the president is referring to tax breaks received by owners themselves as individuals, but his recently-released tax plan contains several breaks that would be of extraordinary benefit to the owners, such as the repeal of the estate tax, so that seems rather unlikely.
    • Twitter, naturally, is of two minds:

   

   (notice the FOX logo bottom-right, like your Uncle did)

  • COMPLETELY serendipitous to this pronouncement is the rule change mandating all players & officials stand for the national anthem.
  • OLD MAN FIGHT!
    • Joe Namath & Mike Ditka have opposing viewpoints. One rational; one unhinged. Guess which is which, and the go read the comments in order to resume hating humanity.
      • Joe Namath: “Look up the meaning of oppression,” Namath said. “Look up the definition of oppression, and you understand that it’s obviously taken place.”
      • Mike Ditka: “But, all of a sudden, it has become a big deal now — about oppression. There has been no oppression in the last 100 years that I know of.”
  • Anyone else? Yes, Mr. Smith again?


Tonight’s sports:

  • MLB: UPDATE: Rained out; Game 4 Wednesday afternoon.
    • Game 4: Washington Nationals at Chicago Cubs – 5:30PM | TBS / Sportsnet
  • NHL:
    • Blackhawks at Canadiens – 7:30PM | NBCSN / RDS / TSN (Quebec)
    • Coyotes at Golden Knights – 10:00PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet
    • Senators at Canucks – 10:00PM | RDS / TSN (Ottawa) / Sportsnet (Pacific)
      • Maestro & Beerguy GON BE drunkenly yelling at each other
  • Futbol:
    • CONCACAF World Cup 2018 Qualifier:
      • Honduras vs. México – 7:30PM | TELMUN

I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE “WAR ON CHRISTMAS”!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Col. Duke LaCross

I don’t know if that beach is even there anymore after that hurricane.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sadly you may be right.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Game Time Decision
Game Time Decision

been there, it’s crazy how close you are to the plane

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

It’s ironic this Vegas game has turned into a massacre.

Senor Weaselo

What is the Golden Knights’ goal song anyways?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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WCS

Eh. Close enough.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

*cancels 1st class tickets*

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Just kidding. I’d rather die than sit amongst the proletariat.

Senor Weaselo

That’s probably not good.

Gratliff

Ah, how I missed hockey. Occasional moments of triumph peppered in amongst endless moments of despair

WCS

This should be the title of your, or any Flyers fan’s, autobiography.

Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!
Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!

I also cannot wait until the Oilers overpay Cam Talbot.

BrettFavresColonoscopy
WCS

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Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!
Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!

I saw everyone was picking Vegas to be dead last in the preseason, and one day I looked at the rosters and thought…. there’s at least two or three teams worse than them.

The Coyotes were one of them.

Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!
Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!

“They’re really improved, they got Niklas HJalmarsson!”

Yes a bit player on a good team who has already been forgotten about in Chicago. That defense is still horseshit, even considering Ekman-Larsson,

litre_cola

Colorado too. They have fucked themselves a wee bit by carrying 9 d men right now and having that Russian not play.

WCS

Buffalo’s going to be a dumpster fire again, too. So’s Carolina. And the Islanders are going to try their damnedest to waste as much of John Tavares’ prime as possible.

Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!
Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!

I actually think the Islanders are on the right track, however if he leaves, then that goes up in flames.

Buffalo has $30 million tied up in 4 players until 2022 (Eichel, O’Reilly, Okposo, and Ristolainen).

Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!
Buddy Cole's Off-Season Habit!

I still think Buffalo is dogshit.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I need to work harder on everything. This is intolerable

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Why am I watching Fargo? I just want to beat Jerry to fucking death.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Wild Things was a great movie, wasn’t tits?

litre_cola

I enjoyed tit.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Remember when SI photoshopped Goodell onto that “Unity” cover while not having Kaep appear?

God Almighty, sports and sports media are fucking terrible.

litre_cola

The Skating Rebels are out quickly to a 2-0 lead.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

*3-0

litre_cola

Thank you Ayo.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

*4-0

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

*5-1

theeWeeBabySeamus

Soooooo…the ‘Yotes appear good again this year, huh?

WCS

The Mick really is Sweet Dee Becomes a Babysitter.

It’s actually pretty good.

Croooow
Croooow

I guess I’ll root for Iceland in the World Cup.

litre_cola

WILL TRUMP TWEET ABOUT NO WORLD CUP> TERRIBLE FOR THE RATINGS!

WCS

SAD!

litre_cola

Oh the twitter taeks are flying.

Senor Weaselo

Make America Great At Soccer For the First Time?

SonOfSpam

Just got home; did I hear correctly that we don’t get to go to the World Cup because of Trina’s Dad and Two Bagels? Seems odd, but I guess rules are rules.

the Alpha and the Amoeba
the Alpha and the Amoeba

Just watched Moneyball, then did some Googling.

Did you know that the brains behind the scheme (the Jonah Hill character), is now the Chief Strategy Officer for the Browns?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yes

litre_cola

Prepare the taek machine. USMNT out.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Does Arena survive?

litre_cola

No chance. This is massive. They havent missed out since 1986.

Senor Weaselo

Does anything survive?

litre_cola

Christian Pulsilic, he is the future.

Senor Weaselo

Okay, other than Pulisic, does anything survive?

litre_cola

4 years is a long time, none of the head office should, Altidore, Bradley, Dempsey will all be very old and be blamed.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

They see me rollin’
They hatin’…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

BOK BOOKKKKKK

Who’s the angry bird?

theeWeeBabySeamus

litre_cola

Ooh USMNT v the Socceroos would be great.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehe…. Ice Birdcano and Ice Showgirls (best I got, sorry…Ice Wayne Newtons maybe?) play next.

Now that is gonna be some quality hockey right there I bet.

Senor Weaselo

Isn’t it Ice Raiders, or is that not until the move?

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I think it’s allowed.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It disrespects the flag.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Might as well go with it and get used to it I guess.
Though I would love to see Wayne Newton get checked into the boards. Ain’t gonna hurt his face none at this point….he already looks like Jeremy Roenicke and Liza Minelli had a kid.

Senor Weaselo

You know Celine’s got a phenomenal snap shot.

SonOfSpam

She’s built like a damn hockey stick.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I could really get on board with naughty Swift.
Rather swiftly, one might say.

litre_cola

I like Skating Rebels

herodotus450
herodotus450

Heh, is it more satisfying when Montreal is terrible all year or when they win the division and lose in the first round of the playoffs? I’m leaning towards the former. Plus that allows them to draft and later squander some young talent.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Damn you and your stone hands Michael Grabner

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

How many years ago was this gif?? Cleveland was 5-4???

herodotus450
herodotus450

That must have been a mistake and that was actually the score of the game.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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I bet the pie is good at this place.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I think I can smell it from here in fact.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
herodotus450
herodotus450

Don’t know, and don’t care what the general reaction is to the whole hockey faceoff rule enforcement is, but I like the change. Kick em out right away and drop the puck.

Senor Weaselo

/Checks ESPN app, sees US lesser footy score
So there will be sane, well-reasoned taeks regarding this, right?

litre_cola

Nope. Cant wait.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Not sure which organization needs to be burned down first: USA Hockey or USMNT

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

At least you had “burned” in your hot take.

litre_cola

Hat trick Messi.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I hear he’s OK at this football thing.

litre_cola

I kinda wanted to watch them riot if they didnt qualify. They were down one nil and the kerosene was getting ready to burn. Then Messi happened.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

As if I hated the Ice Stillers as it is, the intermission of the Ice Giants Ice (former) Rams, they showed them at the White House.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Joe Kapp can throw a punch.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

I believe I called that Goodell 180, did I not?

King Hippo

You can’t do anything that makes Herr Fuhrer look like he won. Feeds the fascism and the narcissism. For once, public opinion was on the NFL’s side, FFS.

National Fucking Disgrace once more

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Blind squirrel did not call Tighty Whity’s Skid Marks.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I have discovered the Casino, and it is tasty:

2 oz gin
1/2 oz lemon juice
1/2 oz maraschino liqueur

combine in a rocks glass with ice. Stir and sip.

herodotus450
herodotus450

maraschino liqueur? Is that like the leftover cherry juice, but alcohol-ized? Better get a liver on the line, cause if I ever find that stuff I’m gonna need a new one.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I have some. It’s clear, but does taste similar to the “cherry juice” you describe. I sometimes add a dash of it to bourbon.

scotchnaut

Feeling old yet?

King Hippo

well, now I could use some cocaine

scotchnaut

Lollipops and candy are great, aren’t they?

King Hippo

RAINBOWS and puddles too!!

scotchnaut

Crap! I edited so that you didn’t have to respond and now it’s weird.

/I’m okay with weird though…
//feel free to edit yours…

scotchnaut

Son of a bitch! I LOVE rainbows as well! Will wonders never cease?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

What about poodles?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I bet you’re fun as hell on coke. Holee Molee I wish I’d seen that.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Shit, did I just mess up a scotchy covert cover up operation?

ICE CREAM….you’d be fun as hell to see on ICE CREAM.

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

Fuck Mike Ditka and good evening.

WCS

There is fuck-all on tonight. Am I supposed to actually engage in conversation with my family?!

theeWeeBabySeamus

At least one of ’em can’t talk yet.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus, now this is some industrial level procrastination on my part.
I’m actually watching the Ice Alouettes and the Ice Bears. I need professional help.

litre_cola

I know it isnt your brand of beer but Argentina game has been fucking good. 2-1 at the half. Is that higher scoring than the halftime yesterday?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hell, if it will make me feel like less of lazy fuck, might as well give it a shot.

Redshirt

Have you ever spent 18 hours on Wikipedia instead of starting a term paper due the next morning?

theeWeeBabySeamus

It wasn’t a term paper, but otherwise…yep.

Redshirt

Okay then. You are on my level.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey, right now I’m watching hockey b/w two sides I can’t stand, while working on some photoshops for TGISF this week. So I guess it isn’t the worst procrastination ever, but it ain’t great.

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I discovered Wikipedia in college writing a paper about the Vietnam War and Richard Nixon, which linked to the Futurama Wikipedia page, which led to a total loss of productivity over the next few hours.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I use it a lot for research when I’m writing (real writing I mean, not the crap I post here) and I can’t tell you how many times something like that has happened to me.

LMFAO

Senor Weaselo

Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I’m all for these idiot MAGA chuds wanting to withdraw all political and economic support to the NFL and every other pro sports league. Fuck it, throw in the NCAA while we’re at it. That organization is more evil than all the pro leagues combined.

Senor Weaselo

Remember when I talked about how the Ice Giants had defensemen that weren’t McDonagh? Uh…

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

But Shattenkirk?

Redshirt

Its times like this that I hope we’re all part of a nightmare by John Adams the night of July 1, 1775. That way he can go to Second Continental Congress, tell them about his nightmare and push for reconciliation with the Kingdom of Great Britain.

If that’s too much, I can live with a nightmare by Thomas Jefferson the night of September 16, 1787, and them inserting a Psychological Evaluation into Article Two Section 1 before the delegates signed.

King Hippo

Both men no doubt nodded in their graves when Dubya said “that was some weird shit.”

/read that long-assed John Adams biography if one hasn’t already, it is well-worth your time investment as an American citizen

monty this seems strange to me

I read the Adams one several years ago and I remember it being good but hard to get through. Read the Hamilton one earlier this year and it was really good. Reminds me that politics have always been dirty.

scotchnaut

The Giants will be replacing Odell, Brandon Marshall, Dwayne Harris and Sterling Shepard with Tavarres King, Darius Powe and a 15 yard punt. Lloyd Cole sums up my feelings….

King Hippo

Buck up, troUper, you still have Roger Lewis!

scotchnaut

The actual Giants versus what I thought they would be courtesy of TroUper

WCS

Leave it to Giants to once again out-do the Jets in every aspect.

litre_cola

There is South American qualifying tonight. Argentina could possibly not qualify. Don T sent a message today showing the police in Buenos Aires putting up barriers so the locals dont burn the place to the ground if they miss out.

WCS

scotchnaut

Has Ditka ever been anything else but a blathering dickbag?

Inanimate Carbon Rod Marinelli

He was a shitty coach too.

scotchnaut

The Saints job exposed him for what he was.*

*a ridiculous loud-mouthed, front-running dickbag that didn’t know what the hell he was doing

/The city of Chicago swallowed it whole

theeWeeBabySeamus

What a boring ass night.
Maybe I can get some work done.

/opens beer
//checks dvr

King Hippo

I hope Mike Ditka’s wee-wee turns green and falls off.

Nice that the rain will give the stupid Nationals a legit chance to rid October of the Small Bears.

Can’t stop laughing at Birdcano trading one washed-up corpse for another. At least CJGlueFactory was on a free.

monty this seems strange to me

“I wouldn’t say Brady was hit in every body part.”
– Vernon Davis

http://tireball.com/nfl/files/2013/12/vernondavisgrab.gif

LemonJello
LemonJello

What did Christmas Jones do to deserve a war?
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scotchnaut

“Wish I was a baby again.”

-Truth Biscuit

Redshirt

I can’t believe I forgot about Denise Richards and her beautiful tracks of land.