Unless you’re in a lesser league that actually has a championship in week 17 when playoff-bound teams are resting their stars or getting them off the field as quickly as possible, your fantasy dream of winning a non-existent-in-real-life trophy begins for serious today. I’m not under much pressure in one money league, having finished 9th and all but in t’udder one I’m up against the #2 seed who takes this stuff far too seriously. I’ve pondered it for a bit now and I’m going to do it-I’M STARTING WORLD ACCORDING TO GARPOLLO OVER CAM! I figure that either way I’ll have a tale to tell to whatever disinterested sap I corner at the next family get-together. Kidding! Why would I talk about that crap IRL? TO THE GAMES!
Ind/Buf: The Bills rushing O is ranked 8th and rb McCoy should have no problem getting going against a Colts team that gave up the ghost well before Halloween. Qb Peterman is back to distribute the ball equally between both teams.
Chi/Cin: This one looks like a keeper. This tilt is between the two worst offenses yards per game-wise in the whole of the league. Maybe TruthBiscuit will pass more than 12 times!
GB/Cle: The Pack can say they’re in the playoff hunt at 6-6 with the Cowboys and the Lions despite the fact that Seattle and Carolina are 8-4 and Atlanta sits at 7-5. I guess YA GOTTA BRIE-LIEF! The Brownskis are running out of chances to insert a 1 into the W column.
Oak/KC: Flag-heaving cb Peters is out for this battle of the .500’s. Wr Cooper is still out as well but Crabtree is back and should be matched against not-quite-in-game-shape-just-yet cb Revis. Can qb Carr get his first win at Arrowhead?
Dal/NYG: Eli is back in the saddle again-can he be the next Rocking Horse Winner? D.H. Lawrence says the odds are slim. But who knows, maybe the Giants players have a little “Fuck You, McAdoo!” tucked away in their arsenal.
Det/TB: The Leos have frittered away a comfy 6-4 record by losing their last two. Qb Stafford’s hand was not able to dodge a Ravens’ cleat last week but Fatty has been avoiding questions about his damaged appendage all week long. Apparently he practiced on Friday so the Jake Rudock Era will just have to wait for at least another 7 days.
Min/Car: The Keenum/Thielin combo has been quite the revelation this year and rb Murray is starting to reap the benefits-he’s tallied over 75 yards rushing over his last 3 outings. The Panthers have won 4 of 5 but the sked (Saints last week, Minny today) is doing them no favours whatsoever.
SF/Hou: 2-10 vs. 4-8? No thank you! (Go Jimmy, Go!)
Tap away Gents/Ladies.
Hey guys!!! Mike Evans actually caught a ball.
Holy shit.
“We’re not just a well-worn phrase, you know.”
-The Law of Averages
Oh for fuck’s sake, young sheldon is still a thing?
It’s (gah!) the number one *thing* in The Canada.
A Christmas Story Live.
Who the fuck actually wants to see that? The movie is fine…why do we need to see a live version of this movie, with completely different actors?
Its not like its fucking Shakespeare.
Holy shit. Garrett had been there for 8 years already??
Hmm. Yes. Indeed.
SHOW THE INDY GAME, COKED OUT RED ZONE GUY!!
wished I was coked out
See how I first-world-problemed that?
I don’t think you can see anything due to the snow. From what he said they have only one camera that has any visibility to the field. I wonder if the radio broadcasters can see enough to actually call the game.
It looks like an old NFL films video. Minus the abortions of a uniform Buffalo is wearing.
Request to join the Bills Mafia facebook group they stream the games live.
ttps://www.facebook.com/100001337844377/videos/1539611786093401/
Drinking something called Freedom Tower, which I’m quite enjoying
Was it originally a French drink in 2001?
That sounds good doc. Ive got the 21st amendment Blood Orange IPA….its ok….
Anyone else gonna do a can check?
Whoooo! We have a time game folks!
Josh Gordon, still good
Well Josh Gordon would be well-rested yes.
I sat Cam newton…..gotta pick Vikings over Panthers.
But I sat Dak for Cam
Who’d you start?
Sean Lee!!
Dangerous ball security, Mr. Duck.
Eli’s back.
Giants fumble.
Eli getting the standing O.
Rb promptly fumbles the ball.
/Giants recover
I was hoping for a pick six
Kind of sad, really.
Glad he’s back. Even a bad Broadway play is only worse with an understudy.
Nachos on deck; chocolate cake happening soon afterwards. Red Zone happening, and mom and Lady Maestro are cooking up a storm of many other things. ‘Tis a grand afternoon, folks.
How much Dak could a wood Dak Dak if a would Dak could Dak wood?
Hah! Damn Nugent!
Whooo lets do this!!!!
Can you imagine if Trump owned a reall sports team? There’d be so much fucking point shaving and equipment tampering. He’s make double-J look like a saint.
He’d launder his bets though his dumbass kids
I bet he’d manage to convince some dumb city council to give him a shitload of money, and use a tiny fraction of it to build a slipshod dump of a stadium.
Dak should have ran for it.
Oh no, Dak sucks again.
Item #1 on the checklist:
– Release yo’ brakes.
The Browns just made the most epic derp in defensive coverage in the history of shitty NFL teams.
3 Deep Coverage, the Packers QB scrambles and somehow a wide receiver has a buffer of about 20 yards between him and the nearest defender.
Another Bengals penalty. Everyone take a drink!
I don’t have that game on, so I should just drink continuously to make sure I keep up?
They’re averaging a penalty a minute.
Why the slowdown?
#UnionTroubles
Just following on Twitter (because why let me watch an entertaining but meaningless game) what is up in BUF?
Just youtube the streams.
DOn’t think they’ll even bother with DMCA requests for a Buffalo-Jets game
Crikey Moses Teh Pauls.
something something who we thought they were
Dumbest ass somersault ever
I love it when the pros look like we used to playing in the park during winter. It really makes me want to go outside and play and then I remember I’m 34 and haven’t taken a tackle in nearly 20 years and I could probably knock out 3 plays before wheelchair time.
I managed to play (fairly) competitive basketball until 36. That was… a while ago. Some days my lizard brain thinks that I could still hang with the 20 somethings.
Cowboy rb got Munson-ed
please tell me Alfred Morris not ded
I hope not, I still like him even tho dallas 🙁
He took the red zone runs, so WHEW
He good still.
Watching from a bar in MIA, got MIN-CAR here. Good selection of game, not a great bar (plastic cups, food from the pizza hut next door, though the beer selection is okay and the bartender does good)
Business or pleasure, Dok?
Neither? I had a bunch of trips booked on my get the hell out of Chicago agenda, and now that I’m no longer in Chicago I’m still taking the trips with the addition of rt SFO-ORD flights bracketing. It’s a good thing I like flying. I ended up sleeping most of the time I was here
Best Blizzard Game EVAR!!!
#ThePauls
Did Minnesota just regress an entire season’s worth in one drive?
If the nfl writers have their say, it would about time.
Bengals are well on the way of breaking last Monday’s record for Penalty Yards.
Started Indy D v. J. Peterman in the blizzard (DFO ball). FUN SHIT!!
Whoo Panthers!
Is Giancarlo Stanton starting in place of Eli this week?
HOW THE FUCK YOU DOIN’, BOYS? (And gals!)
Drinking!
pilled out!!
Jets gonna kill the Donkies.
It is Sunday, I am out of weed, I ordered some on thursday but due to Xmas delivery I got it delivered roday! HUZZAHHH!!! Take that Bleergh!
Soooooo jelly of folks getting In Dee Buff (h/t Monty)
Alright Cowboys, let’s keep those white pants white. Giants are going to be sneaky today.
Let see if the Bengals have enough players to field a defense.
Morning folks. Only one quick 2 team parlay today. Minnesota and SF to pay +140.
Time for an egg sandwich and football. See you after the early slate.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did you braise the football or what?
Fat Stafford leaving the game after throwing one pickerception would be much appreciate.
Only good think that came out of Episode III.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAKtZ_r0V6E
https://youtu.be/3F1d3QWsyk0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXi9h2J-Ihw
Girlie with tight butt is Alicia Witt, btw.
the best part of the worst Justified season
She’s from Woo-stah Mass!
I bet she parties with that guy from Holy Cross.
My uncle went to Holy Cross, played linebacker, back in the 1960s. He ended up as the guidance counselor at Mansfield High School (my hometown, next town east from Foxboro) and by all reports was a colossal asshole at his job as well as at life in general.
The only acceptable solution to Republican voters is not to vote for either Moore or Jones. Only vote for people who’s earned your vote, not lost it the least.
I had conversations about this exact issue with my brother (who is a Republican) and my wife (who is decidedly not). I can understand not voting for Jones if you don’t support his positions. But voting for Moore is giving your tacit approval to a literal child molester.
Jones also said he will vote his constituents on abortion, FWIW.
I’ll believe it when I see it.
He’s an honorable man, I believe what he says. And he really is just a 3-year placeholder. I understand people not able to pull the trigger on a D (like the other Sen didn’t, but basically argued it’s ok to do), but he’s made his pitch, and I believe it’s a decent one, to serve the people honorably.
The query each individual of conscience has to answer is “do I have to affirmatively vote to stop the monster” or is being an affirmative part of putting a D in federal office (even temporarily) a bridge too far?
I mean, it’s FUCKING ALABAMA, there is no way this starts a liberal tidal wave that washes over any kind of even almost normal Republican in a Presidential year election.
I respect every person’s decision that is made after careful, prayerful and/or thoughtful deliberation.
It’s Alabama. We should be happy he’s not also voting for Roy Moore
But he’s playing for your team man, and that’s all politics is anymore