https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82oSu6gIvms
If you are receiving this, it means the blizzard has finally stopped & I can get out of the house. Doing more food deliveries tonight; last week was sadly uneventful, so I’m hoping for something interesting.
Tonight’s sports:
- Olympics:
- NBC | 8:00PM – Bobsled, Figure Skating Gala
- NBCSN
- 7:00PM – Curling (Women’s Gold Medal Match)
- 10:30PM – Hockey (Men’s Gold Medal Game)
- Who fucking cares vs. Big fucking deal
- CBC
- 8:00PM – Bobsled, Figure Skating Gala
- 10:30PM – Hockey (Men’s Gold Medal Game)
- TSN
- 7:00PM – Curling (Women’s Gold Medal Match)
- NHL:
- Bruins at Leafs – 7:00PM | Sportsnet / NHLN
- Jets at Stars – 7:00PM | Sportsnet1
- Oilers at Kings – 10:00PM | Sportsnet
- NBA:
- Thunder at Warriors – 8:30PM | ABC / TSN2
- NCAA:
- Gonzaga at BYU – 8:00PM | ESPN2
- Arizona State at Oregon State – 8:00PM | ESPNU
- Missouri at Kentucky – 8:15PM | ESPN
- Long Beach State at Cal State (Fullerton) – 10:00PM | ESPN2
- Arizona at Oregon – 10:15PM | ESPN
- UFC:
- UFC Fight Night: Emmett vs. Stephens – 8:00PM | FOX / TSN5
Spring Training baseball kicks off tomorrow afternoon. Russell Wilson’s playing with the Yankees. WHY WOULD THE ROCKIES TRADE HIM?!
Absolutely True Fact: Germany’s unis were designed by Coldplay’s song, “Yellow”.
I was thinking more like someone having an acid flashback to the old Canucks unis.
http://www.icejerseys.com/images/products/33/Vancouver-Canucks-Vintage-Replica-Jersey-1989-Home-N1948_S.jpg
Nice shot of a Russian hockey player blasting something up his nose for a quick pick-me-up. That won;t raise any eyebrows.
Christ, at this point if one of ’em tested positive for good old cocaine I’d find it a refreshing change of pace.
good old cocaine
-A Great Number Of Commentists Looking Back On Their 20’s
Yeah. “20’s”
If someone can do coke on the reg and keep a job beyond their late 20’s… Well, you’re a better mensch than I.
/not jewish, not doing cocaine
Cocaine: When you just don’t have the time for an 8 hour meth high
-Not Commentists
Hey, some of us have gotta work in the morning!
/Has never done cocaine
This is where Germany needs to deploy their Siege of Stalingrad defense.
Because that worked so well the first time.
When you go into a restaurant bathroom and there are two locking mechanisms as one has clearly been broken, don’t you always stop and wonder how that happened?
No, because I will shit in the street before I use a restaurant bathroom for anything other than a quick piss.
My first job was washing dishes in a seafood restaurant. Dishwasher is the low man on the totem pole, so if something goes horribly wrong in the bathroom, (and in a seafood restaurant with questionable hygiene practices, it will with some frequency), you’re the first line of defense.
Suffice it to say I’ve seen things that would make Audie Murphy think twice about going in.
Wuss
THAT LATE GOAL I CALL IT NIGHT OF THE LONG KNIVES BECAUSE IT’S THE KIND OF THING THAT CRIPPLES GERMANY LATER
THAT LATE GOAL I CALL IT ‘PEARL HARBOR’ BECAUSE IT’S THE KIND OF THING THAT CRIPPLES GERMANY LATER!!!-is a thing I was working on but couldn’t get quite right and then WCS did a better job.
Fucker.
So I doubt too many of y’all are watching Lakers-Kings (maybe zero of you?), but late in the 3rd Kentavious Caldwell-Pope has 30 points and 8 threes. He’s basically throwing up flaming basketballs while a weird-sounding announcer says “He’s on fire”
“Kentavious Caldwell-Pope”? Like that’s a real person. Nice try, Spam.
“…Drops a bomb on Germany.”
Did Mike Milbury really just say a Russian player “dropped a bomb on Germany”?
The fuck am I saying? It’s Mike Milbury. Of course he said that.
“Dropped a bomb on Germany, and Germany responds by sending a couple retards to a gas chamber. Whatta game!”
If they let Mike drink during games he wouldn’t go three minutes without saying this, or something worse than this.
What I’m saying is that Mike Milbury is a fucking asshole.
Maybe they should pair him with Walton. Or Limbaugh.
Or Hilter. In his current state.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17lkdqoLt44
Tolstoy-1
Goethe-0
I can’t wait until this game goes to OT and we’re all hammered and making ‘Eva Braun in the bunker” jokes that we will sorely regret in the morning.
“There’s very little history between these two teams.”
-Announcer
“You’re shitting me, right?”
-Historians
“The structure of the Germans is strong.” So… they’re German?
The German goalie is really thwarting the Russian offensive. Makes you wonder where he was in 1943.
The Germans play a “quick, aggressive style to take an early lead” do they? Let’s see how that works against the Russians…
Evening, gents. Started with beer a couple hours ago, which was a “hair of the dog” thing from last night. I should stop. Nah. Anyway, hope everyone has a kickass Saturday night. Put on some Queensryche CDs, eat some dried cuttlefish, jack off on a neighbor’s porch, whatever.
DeAndre Ayton playing till like the highest paid player on the court tonight.
Welp, the Germans have entered the Russian defensive zone, and in the winter to boot.
So I guess we know how this game is gonna work out the rest of the way.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WFdL_6tAuc
Stalin’s “choking them with our dead” strategy may not work in this particular circumstance.
It would be 2 minutes for too many corpses on the ice.
I broke the site by telling milkman stories. Who knew?
We all know what happens next.
I’m checking on the site slowness/weirdness going on. It’s…workingish right now but there’s SOMETHING odd. I won’t quit until it’s fixed or I run out of whiskey.
Stupid imgur. Let’s do this one instead:
?w=1024&s=6235eac7bcb4b5fb820a993138d5f660
THE RUSSIAN BLUE LINE I CALL THE EASTERN FRONT BECAUSE THE GERMANS BROKE THROUGH EARLY BUT NOW THEY’RE ON THE DEFENSIVE!
I’m back in-slaughtering that goat while facing Mecca finally paid off!
My favorite part of a zombie movie is when the outbreak starts and society collapses. Why do they always blow through that part?
Speaking of, there’s just been a glitch in the DFO matrix.
Invisible buttons!!
Are you breaking the site again, internet Dad? Also, what’s it going to take to change my avatar? Also, I can’t find the button for internet explorer. Is the internet down?
That’s one of the reasons why the original Dawn of the Dead is so good. It’s entire premise is about that.
Honestly preferred Day of the Dead, if only for the dismemberment scenes at the end
I think the Germans scoring in this game is the only acceptable usage of Kraftwerk 4000 as a goal song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9y7OiVpCls
This would be the biggest German upset since the Beer Hall Putsch.
So I guess we’re rooting for those scrappy underdog Germans?
Dass ist gut, ja?
If they could just create more room for themselves, they’d be in pretty good position for the future
“She’s Got Hips!”
-ZZ Top’s first draft
http://www.kpbs.org/news/2018/jan/08/american-experience-amazon/
A story about a man and his son going on an short, uneventful camping trip and bonding a little.
So two in the stink.
Gets moderated. WEIRD.
I’ve watched two weeks of curling, and I still don’t know what’s going on.
Anyway, getting close to seeing not-Russia Prague Summer Germany.
Evening fellas
Somebody has some extra time on his paws…
Testes
Of course there was also that time that I was introduced to the concept of female hair loss. That was a bit of a shocker and definitely not a boner-inducer. I ended up writing her off as a witch.
But you gave her a shocker first?
I was in Wichita after all. It was obligatory.
So two in the stink.
As a kid I delivered milk house to house. A ton of folks-despite the fact that I was there at the same time twice a week-weren’t awake or ready to pay for the aforementioned cow-centric drinkables. This always pissed me off and slowed me down. But there was that one morning when a large-breasted senior that I had a crush on sleepily answered the door in a sheer nightgown. How I managed to get through the rest of that workday with that raging boner I’ve no idea.
/csb*
*calcium story, bro
Because you jerked off in the next-door neighbor’s shed immediately after.
Speaking of bobsledding . . .
Stupid, stupid Panthers.
Fun game.
Was really hoping Washington could blow a 4 point lead in 5 minutes, but alas
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se8ABHcq8g4
It’s nipply in this Starbucks. I know that’s to get us to leave but I have barely left the apartment in two weeks. So of course this is me being stupid.
https://gfycat.com/@unsurprised/albums/hot
Anyone have late GAMBLOR action?
Figure skating gala? Why is that a thing?
There are lots of perverts who like to see these skaters showing off their panties.
I’m so happy Giroux remembered he’s an elite hockey player this year
The reverse angle is maybe more impressive looking
Anybody else thoroughly sick of conservatives bitching about companies boycotting the NRA when they want companies to be free to deny gay people wedding photographers and cakes?
From now on I’m pronouncing MAGA MayGay just to piss people off.
They’re the same dipshits who broke their Kuerigs after the company dropped Hannity’s show.
With so many valid reasons to smash a Keurig, it’s really quite embarrassing to use a bullshit one
Rank hypocrisy from the right? Why I never!
Canada gets the bronze in hockey!
Why not GoUld?
-Tiger Canada mom
About ten people unironically ‘dilly dilly’d in this bar for a toast so it’s time for me to leave.
Nuke the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
That a good idea. I hear there’s also some silly silly trouble there.
“He just kept yelling ‘killy killy!’…” – a sobbing witness
I have a cat that looks identical.
THIS JEVON CARTER, I CALL HIM C. THOMAS HOWELL, BECAUSE HE’S DOING A PISS-POOR JOB IMPERSONATING AN AFRICAN-AMERICAN COLLEGE STUDENT!
He did become the first player in a major conference to score 1500 points, grab 1000 rebounds, 500 assists, and 300 steals tonight.
I was just joking that he looks like he’s 30.
It does seem like he’s been around for a decade.
Collegiate Kenny Lofton Syndrome?
In one night? Who’s the statistician, and I’m glad to hear that said statistician found new work after getting fired from his job compiling athlete grades in the UNC registar’s office.
Why are there baseball scores appearing on my teevee box?