[sniffs the air]
It was definitely you.
Week 5 Fallout:
-Marquez Valdes-Scantling scored his very first NFL TD and a new fantasy god was born. (not you, Marquez)
-Keke Coutee also scored his very first TD, prompting older white guys to reference “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” for no reason that any other demographic can figure out.
-Gano/Crosby is the new yin/yang of the NFL.
-As a Giants fan, my interest in the top 5 draft prospects of 2019 has been piqued.
-te Ertz only has a single TD but is trending towards a.) a high volume fella and b.) 1400 frickin’ yards!
-a certain 2nd year qb passed a very difficult test with flying colours. Apparently he did his Mahomes-work.
-The Jerrah of course questioned the decision to punt on 4th down and 1. I guess Princeton math ain’t quite up to speed yet.
Is it that time? Yes, yes it is. TO THE GAME!
Was/NO:
The ‘Dacted’s are coming off the way-too-early bye at a white-hot 2-1. If they get another W under their belts they’ll be 1 1/2 games up on the rest of the dregs in the NFC East. One of the narratives that will be repeatedly bounced off your noggin tonight is that Adrian Peterson (the NFL’s very first switch-hitting running back) will be out for R-VENGE! The other thingy will be qb Breezy breaking the elder Manning’s total yards passing mark. If you were to calculate the record into miles (like the graphics department will inevitably do) you’ll find that it’s over 40 miles. That’s a figure that Jack Kerouac isn’t the least bit impressed by.
Have at it, champs.
a do-over?? Is Angel Hernandez working this game too?
That’s not Michael Thomas. Make it Michael Thomas
…and the Dirt Bradys add another field goal.
Just saw that is was 10 nothing. Ouch.
Fox says “we need a Game 5, complete with Big Papi appearance”
2 hours in and only the bottom of the 4th. Yikes.
SEE, CUENCA? This is how you reward a faithful bettor. Assdicks.
Really happy I started Ingram tonight.
Suck it, Alvin Kamara.
Give the fucking ball to Kamara
yeah, cause if Taysom takes teh snap you REALLY have to guard Breesus.
I never knew QBs could have vultures, and yet here we are.
He’s a man on a mission, that Taysom!
I should be drinking at this point. But not the nice cider. But I don’t have anything else. Dammit.
Ingram and Breesus are beating my rival for 1st place in the division. Helping ease the GAMBLOR pain. And my Saints bet looks a’ight.
“Is Brees breaking records tonight?”
– J. Bettis
Detroit, Michigan
“Breaking records? Count us in!” – White Sox fans, circa 1979
BANNER!!!
I haven’t seen a group of Yankees melt down like this since the burning of the White House in 1812.
BannoUr!
I haven’t seen a team of Yankees melt down like this since Cold Harbor.
(nerd!)
Hopefully this is just a 19-8 moment. Everyone likes to talk about what happened after that of course.
Chefs/RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!! en Mexico?? Balls must do Boots on el Ground!!!
/because he will be SAFE, you see
Because he is an Angelino?
and in all serious, whoever picked that fixture for MNF is promotion-worthy
Lutz…fired by halftime?
That gag about the fire department having to come and get the guy down off the goalpost after the game makes me laugh.
It’s ok, still have Deportivo Cuenca (+120) @ shitass Guayaquil City. NOTHING CAN GO WRONG THERE!
Kerrigan!
/Dok Lady Boner
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uDTYdFGhjs&ab_channel=It%27sAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphiaTribute
This episode might just be my favorite Dennis episode.
the “Time’s Up” speech and “This must doooooo” are still my favourites.
That is now THREE calls that Angel Hernandez has botched in the ALDS.
How does he still have ANY job at all, let alone playoff assignments? It’s like a mega-troll job to turn us all against unions.
You have to look at the calls he’s not getting wrong.
Angel Hernandez gets another one wrong.
Can’t believe Once Caldas is gonna draw with Leones at home. This was a -140 bet FFS!!!
only 3 goddamned added minutes!
fuck you, YOU have a problem
Yeah my account is empty after a horrible weekend.
Well, my kicker missed his XP, Litre. HAs your 1% gone up to 2?
Come on boys, it’s Nathan Eovaldi, he was garbage in the Bronx.
maybe he’s a REBEL??
I will have no issue with a Houston v Milwaukee world series.
I would love it, and the Fox execs would kill themselves.
THA FACKIN’ RED SAWX!!!!
It was 40 this morning, 55 at noon, 85 at 4 pm, and it’ll be 30 tomorrow night. Fucking love Michigan.
Fuck.
Go on- R. Grossman
Time for the NFC East to go 0-4 on the week. Eagles can pretty much just keep shitting the bed til the bye and win the division.
Need moar Thomas points
Kamara isn’t going to get much tonight, but thomas still will.
I could eat pecan pie until I died. Without a doubt.
On another note… good evening, folks. And fuck the Washington Redacteds.
Trade you for some blueberry pie
Just for the record A Star is Born was excellent.
And the Bradley Cooper character did a spot fucking on impersonation of the tWBS voice.
I mean almost to the point of distraction.
I had a feeling Lady Gaga could act.
She did.
Why is Angel Hernandez umpiring a playoff game? Or any other game?
Hear hear!
The real question: why is Angel Hernandez?
That’s game. I’m going for a jog/mild heart attack.
Good work cheating with the pED’s here is a welcome back td. Kamara be damned.
I need 16 pts out of Watson….
Shawn Michaels just un-retired in front of Chicago and the reaction was about 1.4 libraries. In theory, the shockwave should’ve interfered with the broadcast signal.
They were waiting for the right moment to start chanting CM Punk. That moment was when Triple H’s music started playing.
D-Generation X just reunited again. Shawn Michaels and Triple H are older than Hogan and Savage were when WWF was making parodies of WCW booking those two in a nursing home.
Is this the right site for the Dancing With the Stars watch party?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7ne774m5pI
Finally!
Is Evanna Lynch still in it? Asking for younger Senor.
anyone purchase house plants from Amazon before? They arrive in good shape?
Isn’t that how Little Shop of Horrors originally ended?
Plants or “plants”?
plants. i live in Vegas, sticky icky is legal.
Cincinnati and Columbus have offically cancelled Columbus Day. No words on if they’ll be changing the city names to an Idenious Person name. I hope so. Shawnee is a better sounding name than Cincinnati and it would be worth it to see people try to say Scioto or Olentangy, or Keenhongsheconsepung if they want to go old school.
Cincinnati is named after the ancient Roman statesman, isn’t it?
Close. Its named after the group that named after him, the Society of the Cincinnati.
i dont remember which Senator proposed it but they want to replace Columbus Day with Election Day as a Federal Holiday.
Bernie
I see from the earlier post you’ll had the day off celebrating the murder and rape of the First Nations.
Evening Folks
Youngest made a blueberry pie for Thanksgiving. No one else but me likes likes pie. How many pieces of pie can I eat a day before I’m (more of) a glutton? Other than all of them.
Happy Thanksgiving! Do you guys get a Black Tuesday up there?
Redshirt, you cant ask stuff like that. Geez man, dont get banned from here.
Do I want to know what dark, twisted door I just opened?
We have Black Friday just like you. Same day and everything. Aka November.
Eat the whole thing or the kid might be offended.
That was never in question, more about how long to eat it all
If it starts to hurt, slow down.
You eat all of those pieces then you tell her/him that it is epic.
Who else is praying for God to send a tsunami to just wipe Louisiana and the entire Gulf Coast off the map?
As long as it takes out Mar-a-lago, I’m completely on board.
Isn’t that on the Atlantic Coast? Either way, I’m sure if God were ever that merciful and caring that it would somehow end up swamped over.
If there’s a God, don’t count on that working. God couldn’t even properly wire our brain, let alone what you’re asking for
Blame Adam and Eve. They got everything they wanted but NO! They wanted an apple!
I’m hoping for an Ebola outbreak at a Trump rally.
If you promise to speak well of me and pay for my family’s needs after, I’m willing to be a Patient Zero.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/2018/10/07/taylor-swift-getting-gasp-political-instagram-post/1562123002/
A celebrity endorses Democrats, but doesn’t instantly demonize those who doesn’t vote her way but instead invites them to study the candidates and select the ones that represents your values not exactly but the closest possible?
When did Taylor Swift become the Voice of Reason?!
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/05/taylor-swift-4chan-conspiracy_n_3709118.html
Look what we made her do.
Who the hell plays afternoon hockey games on a Monday?
Buffalo, NYI, and Bahston, apparently.
Oh, Canadia.
It’s not like anyone in those places works.
Makes sense to have games during the day when it’s a holiday
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/mississippi-marching-bands-halftime-skit-depicted-students-pointing-guns-at-police/ar-BBO7pqY
I have a question. I have a lot of questions honestly, but I have one.
When I was in High School Marching Band, we got our drill assignments in July, had the whole show learned in a few weeks and spent practice doing the show several times. In the hundreds of times they did this, not one of them stopped, looked around and went “Wait a minute. What the hell are we doing here?”
Good for those kids.
This is going to be part of everyday life as cops continue to violently suppress citizens. Police involved shootings are significantly on the rise in Mississippi. It was only a matter of time before something like this started happening
/watching Guardians of the Galaxy again
/as a narrative it’s lovely
//as a distraction it’s off the charts
I don’t want to like this crap but I tend to.
The best movies are the ones that doesn’t take itself seriously.
I may not watch this game tonight, but I can still root for an errant Breesus pass to disembowel the visiting team’s owner.
I don’t think he gets us
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5xrkNeO2QI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rt4rzRCy_XU&ab_channel=It%27sAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphiaTribute
This fantastic episode inspired me to start incorporating “you fat cow!” into my driving lexicon.