Fuck everything, another shitass International Break is upon us. And is JV NFL breaking out the good vintage bottles to ease our suffering? Fuck and No. Your platter of turds follows:
Florida at Vanderbilt (Noon, ESPN)
Some peoples would have you believe that the Gators have turned the corner and are now legitimately good. Those peoples will be noticeably quiet after said Gators lose to Vandy. Yes, this is a thing I bet on.
Iowa at Indiana (Noon, ESPN2)
Bet you didn’t expect these sides to be 4-1 and 4-2, respectively. Still, watching this fixture will give your eyes a sad. But pickins is slim.
Oklahoma State at Kansas State (Noon, ESPNU)
The Battle of Who’s MOAR Disappoint and/or Loser Becomes the Side Most Likely to Almost Lose to Kansas.
Georgia at LSU (3:30, CBS)
The first of today’s two real games (both at same time, of course), featuring a good Georgia side on the road against an angry Bayou Bengal side. If’n this was at night, I’d favour LSU outright. Still think they beat a 7.5 point spread at home, but UGA pulls it out late.
Washington at Oregon (3:30, ABC/ESPN2)
Not sure I believe either of these team’s deserves to be ranked as highly as they are, but still quite watchable and interesting a matchup. Should be a night game, fuckos.
West By God Virginia at Iowa State (7:00, FS1)
I put money on Fuckers du Cousins (+7 at +120) to make this interesting. The late slate is fucking garbage.
Wisconsin at Michigan (7:30, ABC)
Two boring as fuck teams that sportscasters love to jism over. Michigan will likely murder Bucky Badger.
Colorado at USC (10:30, FS1)
Not a strong tweaker slate, even. But the Buffs are unbeaten and a 7-point dog going into Watts. Mildly interesting, I’d say. At least there will be Song Girls.
Fromm kind of blows, huh?
Tomorrow I will attempt to hit up Zaause Schaus. It is a historic dutch village setup, sort of like a European Colonial Williamsburg.
I think I will be able to sample Dutch tradition booze, get some wooden shoes made, and sample even more cheese.
You should go see Young Boys in hot action!!
if you have ready access to funds and live betting, put it all on ND winning when it gets up to +150 or better
This tune got me close to a warm naked body a few times. Yeah, I was a manipulative shithead in my early 20’s…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HMAVU1k7kg
a rare difference, as I always change XM channels when Style Council comes on!
I mean-we can’t be completely alike. That’s just spooky!
plus we could theoretically wingman since you don’t like being able to see they ribs and whatnot! 😀
Well….that sucks.
Imma go to the dump now.
Blankenship is an old and revered Mexican name. Right?
Also, he looks like the 4th Hanson brother.
These things go thru my mind every time I watch UGa
You watching from a Puerto Rican Burger King?
It’s an Ellis Island type thing, they cribbed it off the board game. Trying to Protestant-ize themselves FOAR teh locals.
Holy shit UGa. If you’re gonna fake the FG, which I respect trying, at least call a better fucking play than that.
Jeebus fuck.
oh dear fuck, they tried to get that little Mexican killed. How was that gonna work on a short field??
Hahaha Jorja, good work.
LSU fan with a Lakers jersey….yep…GO Bulldogs!
Probably Shaq.
no, it was LeBron
We replaced the LSU defensing unit with the Hobo ass suckers from Vanderbilt. Let’s see if anyone (other than Hippo, whom God hates) notices!
yeah, fuck off Jawja, u noe u holding
Gon’ be holding a natty champs trophy in about three months.
Nah, ain’t beating Bama with a QB. 2nd best team in the country, though.
Yeah, I was joking. Too one dimensional to get past ‘Bama, Clemson, or ND.
But if they had Ryan Finley, they’d be dangerous.
if/once we lose to Clemson, maybe we will be open to a trade? Are there MOAR Chubbs?
I get one almost every night.
Oh wait, sorry…. You meant….
I met a med student at my kid’s hospital who grew up UGA, and she said they are all from a place (that dates back to right after the Civil War) called – no shit – Chubbtown.
Holy fuck…that’s awesome.
oh, they’d beat all other comers I think. Maybe not tOSU if they were on their best day. Clemson and ND suck.
As long as we’re Squeezing…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pI0y1AMGQ_M
Hai! Just finished work and was cruising teh footbaw, in CFL news the Bombers are beating the Inbreds 31-0 at halftime.
you bet JV Buffalo? I was scared by the 12 points and so took a bad beat and am super tilty instead.
No, I didn’t bet today, was at work.
FUCK
Catch you later.
Did you accidentally pull off your weiner? Wha happen??
According to The Squeeze and Hippo, dark meat is…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJ2cEc_TCH8
this is an AWESOME FUCKING SONG and I sing and blast it every time I hear in the car
True Fact:
This song is a first cousin to The Cure’s ‘Love Cats’.
We once had 3 cats, and the alpha of that pack was exceptionally prissy, and agoraphobic outside (but fucking RULED the indoors without doubt). That was HIS song.
Reeves Hamilton D***s, FWIW
I miss that cat. He would sometimes watch FOOTBAW with me. Shortly after the separation, he had a heart attack and died right in front of me. Congenital defect, nothing we could do. On a sportsball evening.
shout out to Brick in his undisclosed location:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p99a6K81zqM
Programming note: Pitt is this window’s Minny-SEW-ta. Do not hold out faint hopes for an Irish-free playoffs. We are gonna have to root for Roll Damn Tide (unless NC State wins in Death Valley next week) and that’s that.
I love Mexican soccer coverage… hot chicks in tight outfits showing off their curves all over.
That reminds me, all this weather talk and no Yanet Garcia.
Those shoes do not look comfortable. 2/10, doesn’t want to see any bunyons.
I’ll help her out…
You and the toes, THIS GUY BALLS, I CALL HIM REX CUZ HE LOVES FEET AND ASSES.
My asshole vegan kid just became a “vegan plus chicken” – no dairy of any kind whatsoever, but I have someone to split a rotisserie chicken with again!
/the cats eat the dark meat
But the dark meat’s where all the flavor is.
white ppl are scared by too much flavour ,, ppl forget that
I really want to make a joke about eating dark meat.
But I shouldn’t.
Too bad you don’t eat it anymore…
It kinda got too expensive.
I think you already did. Shame on you.
he made US ALL THINK IT and be all racialist by osmosis ,, smh
Rotisserie chicken is the fucking best.
I should go to Costco.
Holy shit, that mofo hit a 53 yarder.
Still a stupid choice to kick here, but at least Hippo’s most favourite play is upcoming.
(onside kick Hippo…get over there)
Never mind. Buncha pussy asses.
9/10, would suck on her nipples for good luck
I’ve scrolled back to this gif far more times than I’m willing to admit.
NO. Trading FGs for TDs, they eat shit.
/making coffee for LSU instead
Why is Pitt dressed like San Jose State?
that’s about their quality level
Brady Tkachuck was the 4th overall pick for the Sens. Check out his reaction when his teammate says that the first person he calls after a game is his girlfriend. Go to 3:30.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srCjEjd37xU
or 25 seconds
Awesome.
Shit, I just have the SEC pre-game show on now. As low as it gets.
Evening folks. Or I guess afternoon…whatever fucking time it is in the states.
I went to Amsterdam this morning. I checked out an art museum, a cheese museum, and a pipe museum.
Amsterdam reminds me a lot of the Jersey shore. A shit ton of people, from all over the place, with tight shirts, spiked hair, and chains, all acting like idiots in public.
For the love of god, will never understand how people don’t realize that doing selfies in the middle of a busy street is NOT a good idea. I think I witnessed at least 10 idiots getting clipped by cars or cyclists.
Also…the fucking internet here blows ass. Its slow as fuck. I can’t even watch ESPN highlights.
But at least you have fewer ads and more privacy …
Europe is even MOAR surveillance-y than here. There’s a great book series, “Europe in Winter” that goes through (amongst other things) how people get past it. It’s fascinating.
Now shall attempt to go on less depression-y music trip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbcfAlGuqVE
Cheese Museum.
No wonder weed has to be legal there.
Every single coffee shop had a table outside with a bunch of loud, annoying American college students acting very obnoxiously high.
Sounds like quality entertainment.
I bet the museum shop at the Cheese Museum is pretty awesome though!
Its basically a cheese shop with a shitload of free samples. So this short old guy, in I shit you not, wooden shoes, starts talking to me. I ended up getting like three triangles of cheese. They are supposed to go to family, but I doubt it will make it to them.
I got pesto goat mix. It literally got a green, blue, and red side depending on the ingredients. Like the red side has tomatoes, the blue…has more pesto and pine nuts. I forget about the blue middle. I then have a Sikkepit Goat Cheese. Very hard. Very salty, with specific crystal structure so it sort of pops in your mouth. The last is a very soft Gouda beer cheese, which I swear to god, tastes like you are eating creamy stout.
I would love to show pics of this stuff, but I can barely stay on the internet. Uploading pics are impossible.
try not to get your finger stuck in a dike.
Have you gone to Brouwerij ‘t IJ yet?
“Puck don’t lie” doesn’t happen to the Ice Giants apparently. 2-1 Ice CFL ‘Dacteuds on the McDavid power play.
Gators putting this game to bed.
All pain is self-chosen…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Swxw2t-9ir4
The recycling center is a sad stop on Saturday morning.
Don’t you just love moments that leave you questioning all your life choices?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HR1D2AYm69A
Yeah, I gotta go do that meself. Of course around here we just call it “The Dump”.
Buncha fancy fuckin’ Californians with their “Recycling Centers” and their Rock n Roll music.
“Whatever. The recycling center is where I find all the best riffs!”
-Kid Rock
The world would be a better place if someone would just rape the shit out of Kid Rock and Kanye West already.
Now I am just watching tOSU bleed the clock dry on mute. To get madder, I guess.
Vandy freshman kickers grow up so fast…
I don’t think Shurmur is very good.
the 75-yard TD was a screen
LOL, yes. I had forgotten that.
not watching anymore, but can’t believe they kicked a FG. What a bunch of blouses.
Who is the best Pat? Pat Riley?
Mahomes-y!!!
(or Summerall, just for the alcohol capacity)
Losing a 21-3 lead in #HAILGAMBLOR? Yup, that’s a deep dive into Satan in Chains:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLi2MjkDBz0
That assdick that was promo’ed to the Sens first line? He’s got an assist already. According to my math, I’m the assdick now.
[sits down in his usual spot on the assdick beanbag chair, sighs]
perfect song for pill #3:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJzrVtioigo
I don’t like this rule about fair catch of kickoffs going to the 25.
Just saying.
Sens up 3 pucks to 0 pucks. Wooo!
actual ice footbaw points, or do you just have more balls than the other side?
No balls in hockey. I’ve never seen a single coach ever go for it on 4th and 1.
WELL! That’s mah notebook CLOSED.
“THREE pucks? And here I am sitting around like a sucker with only one!” – Oberon
Duke would have fumbled on another dumb-ass pylon stretch, luckily stepped out of bounds first.
Hobo. Ass. Suckers.
wonder if Litre bet Buffalo? Up 17-6 after Q3, line was 12 (too high for me)
Hippo just yelled some profanity I think.
I’ll take ML bets on that -1250
my entire existence is a long profanity string
Dropped pickerception? Life is just trolling me now.
“Wait until you see what we have in store for you!”
-Time
weather u think u can or u cant, ur rite!
OK, this UF/Vandy game has gotten totes boring.
I want to see ’em fight again.
According to the crowd shot I just saw, Pat Shurmur is married to 1982-ish Sean Penn.
Hehehehehe
You must have seen her.
I did, yes. LMFAO
Vandy punting here. They won;t fake. Such goddamned weiners.
due to financial constraints, did nae bet Tennessee or K State hunches. Just shoot me now.
Gophers aren’t backing down.
“So cute. They think they’re badgers!”
I’m at a major event of my secret society today. Brick is getting promted up to DOUBLE-SECRET level. Shit, I’m even wearing my tuxedo for only the second time ever and I don’t even remember the first. Next time will be my own funeral probably, or The Oscars.
Secret society or the world’s most elaborate sales pitch for insurance and annuities? WHO’S TO SAY?
Enjoy Sea Org life!!
“Just buy my book after the show Mr. Fancy Pants, okay?”
-Anthony Robbins, host
Edit: Yeah, that didn’t read how it sounded in my head and therefore wasn’t funny.
Will there be punch and pie at your funeral?
SIGH
incredibly bullshit spot
An option on the short side of the field. wtf am I watching?
Boomer Sooner, circa 1977?