Your Suspiciously Quiet Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

NFL News:

  • The trade deadline was 4:00PM ET today, so apologies if I didn’t catch everything before I went to work: (unless noted, all draft picks are for the 2019 draft)  
    • Packer GM Aaron Rodgers Brian Gutekunst sent Ty Montgomery to the Ravens for a GTFO 7th-round pick.
    • DeMaryius Thomas from the Broncos to the Texans for a 4th-round pick.
      • They play each other this Sunday.
    • Dante Fowler from the Jags to the Rams for a 2019 3rd-rounder & 2020 5th-rounder.
    • Golden Tate from the Lions to the Eagles for a third-round pick.
    • Ha Ha Clinton-Dix from Green Bay to Washington for a 4th-round pick.
    • Seahawks released Brandon Marshall, who is now free to sign wherever.
  • The NFL has added a fourth London game to the schedule, effective 2019.
    • Two of the tilts will take place at Wembley Stadium, and two will be played at the Tottenham Hotspur’s new stadium.
    • All that’s known so far is one of the “home” teams will be Jacksonville.
  • Dominque Rodgers-Cromartie didn’t wait for Jon Gruden to trade him & instead chose to retire this morning.
    • It comes after dressing but not playing a snap in last Sunday’s loss.
    • He retires after 11 seasons, but a dozen kids behind his cousin Antonio.
  • Convicted inside trader & suspended Seahawks WR Mychal Kendricks has now been informed the league will be suspending him for eight games.
    • He gets credit for the three games he’s already missed.
    • He’ll be eligible to return for the Hawks Monday Night game versus the Vikings.
    • He still faces up to three years in prison, once sentencing is determined after the season ends.

Beerguyrob’s brief Beerguy movie review:

I loved it. It takes the general story told in “The Right Stuff” and expands upon the Neil Armstrong kids my age grew up idolizing because he walked on the moon. (Also, Alan Shepard – because he took his 9-iron.)

I never read the book it was based on, but Baby Goose is excellent portraying a man who wanted to do his job & do it well. Claire Foy is steely as his wife. The highlights of the movie are the space training sessions, as they show the incredible amount of work that went into planning & prepping for the Apollo missions.

One quibble – I always thought it was pronounced “Gem-men-eye”, but in the movie everyone says “Gem-min-ee”, and it was irritating to hear.

The movie is hardly anti-American or anti-patriotic. Flag fellators might be upset there isn’t one every five feet, but the whole movie is set in the context of the Cold War “Space Race”, and as a battle to beat the Russians. Maybe they’re upset because, even though the landing occured under a Republican, the movie keeps using Kennedy speeches & quotes. It couldn’t be more-pro-American.

If it’s still in theatres, go see it in IMAX. The last 20 minutes are in it, and even at the regular screen I saw, you could grasp the majesty of the lunar surface when the transition occurred.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Islanders at penguins – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Golden Knights at Predators – 8:00PM | NBCSN
    • Flyers at Ducks – 10:00PM | Sportsnet
  • NCAA:
    • Miami (Ohio) at Buffalo – 8:00PM | ESPN2
    • Kent State at Bowling Green – 8:00PM | ESPNU
  • NBA:
    • 76ers at Raptors – 7:00PM | TSN / NBATV
  • WWE:
    • Smackdown – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • How will they replace Daniel Bryan at Crown Jewel? TUNE IN TO FIND OUT!
Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Brick MeathookUnsurprisedMoose -The End Is Well NighSpanky DatassWCS Recent comment authors
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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

The new Higgins in the new Magnum is a chick? WTF.
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

Halloween classic:

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

/Sees what Fowler and Ha HA went for

Bah! Why couldn’t Miami go after either of these guys?

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Fuuuuuuucccccckkkkk

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wow, RAMMIT really are going for it, aren’t they?

Wakezilla

If they win a Superb Owl, maybe they can increase their attendance from 300-350!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Is that Admiral Tso?

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Actually Captain Tso.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

Gotta love the Admiral’s famous chicken.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Maybe there is a reason to hold onto that landline.
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Who had the right of way?
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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Horsey

Wakezilla

Car totally had the right of way

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Holy Shit It’s Only Tuesday

Spoiler
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ballsofsteelandfury

No need to hide that, son.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I know, but I wasn’t sure how big it was going to be.
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Wakezilla

I’ve been saying it’s Thursday all week.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Yeah, no. Ignore that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

You can see Mother Teresa’s clit ring.

ballsofsteelandfury

That should be a banner. With or without context, that’s hilarious.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I’m sure it’s just a fold or something.

https://gfycat.com/ImperturbableHighBurro

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

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ballsofsteelandfury

Examining the evidence closely… I think you’re actually correct. I don’t think that’s a fold…

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I remember the kerfuffle on some pervert board when it aired a million years ago.

ballsofsteelandfury

Here or KSK?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Either Reddit or one of the boards I get my pics from.

Senor Weaselo

But she doesn’t have a clit ring! Ms. Hyland, I mean, no idea about Mother Teresa. Or so I’ve heard, of course…

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

There was no leak. These are not the droids you’re looking for.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

I remember when I was into 15 year olds

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

*GRUMBLE* Time to check in on their moms *GRUMBLE*

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

We don’t need to hear about your boy fetish.

Sarah Hyland is 27 years old.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Things are different in Comcast Country.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

This gif deserves a Nobel Prize.

Senor Weaselo

That’s not Lil B!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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ballsofsteelandfury

That’s fucking beautiful!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

FULL POWER!

Senor Weaselo

Oh great, Lundqvist is down. Welp, time to drink! Wait, I’m writing a Halloween post.

Time to owe myself a drink!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I never liked that lunch-meat that much anyway.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

May have misread that….

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

OCTOPUSSY!!

ballsofsteelandfury

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ballsofsteelandfury

@Spanky,

I brought up your suggestion about using the spoiler instead of breaking up the NSFW links in the back room.

Apparently, the image still loads, so IT departments would be able to see it in people’s cache and that could land them in trouble. For that reason, it was decided it wasn’t a good idea.

Yes, I know we show hot girls in skimpy outfits and lines are blurry, but we drew it from the very beginning at a certain point on purpose and we want to stick with that line.

I hope that explanation makes sense.

It was also pointed out that sometimes the spoiler feature doesn’t work correctly, so that’s something else to consider.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

What is the policy on pictures of airplane engines? I’m asking for a friend.

ballsofsteelandfury

The more on fire the better.

ballsofsteelandfury

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

IAN?!?

Senor Weaselo

I didn’t know Josh from Drake & Josh was a Nets fan.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

or that orgasmic.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

HELL YEAH!!!

Senor Weaselo

“I agree!” -Gary Gin

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

Add beer and yeah that’s pretty much the back room.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Okay, let’s see, who do we got here: Lou Antonio, Richard Davalos, Paul Newman, Wayne Rogers, Dennis Hopper, J.D. Cannon (McCloud!!!!), Harry Dean Stanton, where the hell is George Kennedy, . . .

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That movie…. just holy shit.

Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

Makes perfect sense, thanks!

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Oh, it’s officially Celebration Ale season, folks!

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Get it while it is fresh because it is fan-fucking-tastic!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That looks fucking delicious. Thanks a lot you asshole, now I’m all thirsty.

Senor Weaselo

Rutgers murder plot, local news? Cue the JV Crimebeat! music!

Senor Weaselo

And the Giants backup got busted for eluding the cops for an illegal right turn. Twice!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

Now that’s a cat that would kill a chicken!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I think that cat just used up three lives in an instant right there.

Gratliff

I can never post an IT Crowd gif without ending up back at the time Moss tried to help Roy get over losing his girlfriend in a random D&D game.

Doktor Zymm

Aw, when comedies do kinda serious stuff, but not as sad as Fry’s Dog

Gratliff

I cackled for the most part, though Roy breaking is oddly wrenching

Doktor Zymm

It’s actually pretty sweet

Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

I bought halloween candy on Saturday. The Hershey miniatures assortment, 185 pieces. Tried each of the candies and they rate as follows:
5. Hershey milk chocolate: Solid old friend but it’s no Ghirardelli.
4. Kit Kat: Too crunchy and noisy for the quiet car.
3. Rolo: Milk chocolate and caramel? Fuck yes!
2. Reese’s pb cup: If the Rolo was the same size as the Reese’s they might have swapped positions.
1.Heath bar: Toffee and chocolate; so damn good.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Heath Bars rock. But it’s like you need to get a dental cleaning when you’re done.

Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

Tonight I thought I’d have a bit more of the candy and noticed it was damn dificult to find my favorite, the Heath bar. This got me to wondering just what the ratio of the five sweets was. So I poured them on the table and counted, adding back in the few I had eaten.
Reese’s – 62
Kit Kat – 58
Rolo – 34
Hershey – 21
Heath – 11. ELEVEN!
What the fuck?!

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

0. DIABEETUS

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Also, Bizarre Foods premieres in 3 days

Doktor Zymm
Gratliff

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Doktor Zymm

This is probably my second favorite ep, after Gay! The Musical

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Spanky Datass
Spanky Datass

This is why you never “cross the sabers” in an orgy.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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worth a try.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

One of my friends is an extremely skinny girl who dressed up as a skeleton to party on Saturday. That just seems like cheating to me.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Meanwhile, I’ve settled on stupidly trying to hit 200 pounds by Super Bowl Sunday because if I’m only overweight then I’ll totally be happy and not depressed and hate everything in my life. Right?

WCS

Ask Homer:
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LemonJello
LemonJello

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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LemonJello
LemonJello

Ignored the “Caution” sign – he got what he deserved.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Evening, lizard people. Are we going to the gulag yet?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Perhaps.

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WCS

Check back next Wednesday.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

We’re not that lucky.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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(as an aside, I highly recommend not searching “ass dick” on the internet….the results ain’t pretty)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You like ’em and you knows it!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

It sounds like Daniel Bryan just got himself written off Crown Jewel. It’s been interesting to see who draws the line. Jern’s may have been all public image decisions, but Bryan literally decided it was worth possibly dying to wrestle again, but isn’t willing to do Saudi Arabia.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

You genocide a million Yemenis and no one says a word. You kill one fat propagandist who picked the wrong prince to cheer for and the world can’t stop shitting on you.

Gratliff

It says a lot that that was the line. It says way more that those are the only two refusing to go.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

At least they didn’t fart in the elevator.

LemonJello
LemonJello

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Oh, Demi.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

Got Damn

ballsofsteelandfury

Part 1 of my continuing series on How to Piss Hippo Off:

Rams opponents and records:
1- Raiders 1-6
2- Cardinals 2-6
3- Chargers 5-2
4- Vikings 4-3-1
5- Seahawks 4-3
6- Broncos 3-5
7- 49ers 1-7
8- Packers 3-3-1

Total record of opponents: 23-35-2

First place schedule indeed…

LemonJello
LemonJello

Which part covers pill bottles with the hardest lids to remove?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“First place schedule indeed”

Maybe the schedulers can base it of of future team records.

Eight of the 35 are loses to the Rams. The poor teams were dominated, as you’ expect.

Continued Balls’ disassociation from the sport.

There are four teams that are far and above the rest of the pack and the Rams are part of those whether you have a grudge or not. Those four team are mostly why the records you so proudly present are what they are.

Why didn’t you say “They are worst 8-0 team in the NFL, BY FAR!”

ballsofsteelandfury

Amended: How to Piss Off Hippo and Moose

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m not pissed, just found your point to be dumb, so being OCD I pointed it out.

ballsofsteelandfury

That crack about the first place schedule was because Hippo brought it up in an earlier post.

Just because I don’t give a shit if the Steelers win or lose and otherwise don’t care about ther league doesn’t mean I can’t give Internet friends shit for going overboard backing a young team that, yeah, looks good, but hasn’t accomplished anything yet.

Plus, he thinks the Bears are good… The man needs an intervention.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

We’ll see in about nine weeks, fall and rise happen every year. I find it fun to watch the way they go about their football and I’m glad they turned it around… so far. With the turnover, every team is new or young.

ballsofsteelandfury

I admit I have watched some of their games and I do like the coach and they are certainly talented. Perhaps I should have used inexperienced instead of young. I’ll happily contribute $100 to Hippo’s charity of choice if they make the Super Bowl.

I just love stirring shit up and getting Hippo all worked up.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I think his betting habits do a great job too.

Anything can happen in the playoffs, but I expect them to situate themselves for success.

I will give you shit about your “I’m done” type statements every time you demonstrate that you still watch. It’s a little empty because you don’t seem to have the bettor’s/ FFers anger. That’s when it is interesting.

ballsofsteelandfury

I still love the game. Heck, I’m watching high school football because a friend’s son plays and i’m liking how aggressive the coaches are now. They hardly ever punt and go for it on 4th down from their side of the field.

I hate the NCAA and all it stands for and I hate Roger Goodell and how he has changed the NFL game for the worse.

I still watch occasionally the national broadcasts because it’s fun to joke with the people on this site and you need a frame of reference for that. But I honestly don’t root for the Steelers anymore and the passion is gone.

I still won’t spend another dime on NFL merchandise. Unless it’s counterfeit and I know the profits won’t go back to them assholes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I have a couple of jerseys that never get worn from years ago, but was never into the merch, stuff.

Prolly lucky they don’t sell memes or GIFs.

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ballsofsteelandfury

After you kidding? You’d make a fortune!

Shit, I attribute at least 50% of our website hits to your gifs and jpgs.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

7% are Brick Meathook fans.

ballsofsteelandfury

Is that rounded up from 6.9%?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Nice.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

It’s rounded up from 1%

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’d go broke buyin’ weird shit….. this may happen anyway.

JustStopDude
JustStopDude

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Ty Montgomery didn’t get traded as much as he got shitcanned by the Packers.

LemonJello
LemonJello

I suppose it could be worse…he could be on his way to Buffalo or Cleveland.

JustStopDude
JustStopDude

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Trent Green’s grandfather is the reason he is the man he became.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Oh, to live in a simpler age, back when you could get a good barrel.

blackroseMD1

Clinton-Dix in Washington?

Interns all over the district just shuddered and don’t know why.

LemonJello
LemonJello

This Tuesday Night MAC-tion is…underwhelming.

Awfully quiet in the clubhouse tonight. There a full moon or something?
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ballsofsteelandfury

Ah, the patented Balls Zipper!

scotchnaut

“‘Darkman’ is probably the scariest movie you’ll ever see. I warned everybody about this years ago.”*

-DJT

*not even remotely true

herodotus450
herodotus450

From Russia with Love, very good film, some say the best, but I didn’t ask for love they just sent it.”

blaxabbath

So I came home today and found one (of our last two) chicken dead in the backyard. She was tore up but that’s no surprise considering my dogs.

We have a coop that is fenced in by a picket fence with wire mesh between the slats. I figured she had jumped/flown out but she was alone and she’s the coward so it didn’t make much sense. I also see that the one remaining got beat up on the back because she’s missing feathers back there. This confused me because, while I don’t trust my dogs with the birds out, they don’t work the fence and the birds always scurry away when the dogs are around. So this is weird but then I also find a dead pigeon in the chicken coop but can’t see how it died.

So now I’m thinking it’s one of these fucking feral cats. I mean, the chicken could have flown out and gotten killed by my dogs but, while possible, just doesn’t seem likely (she only flew out once and that was like 8 months ago and the bulky chickens were still alive; and my dogs stay inside almost all day lately. Also, they bring trophies inside.) and doesn’t explain the pigeon. But I don’t know — these are the first chickens we’ve owned and, while they seem to just live to attempt death, I don’t really know how these fucking cats are.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This might sound crazy, but could it have been some kind of raptor (hawk, eagle, etc.)?

blaxabbath

I thought about a bird too but; (1) I am IN the city. Sure, there aren’t skyscrapers here but this is legitimately urban (no Fozz, this is not a challenge); (2) I got a big pecan tree over the yard plus another tree inside the fence with the birds. They are in the corner so along the walls are some citrus trees so, to fly in, you’d have to be in like one of the Independence Day little saucers. (3) With the 6′ walls on two sides and a 30-36 inch picket fence on the other 2, the whole area is only about 8′ x 16-20′. With the coop and tree obstructions, the hawk would have to be absolutely perfect in their attacks and exits — and that’s assuming the chickens are hanging out in part of the about 4 square feet of vulnerability, considering the topography around them.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Shit. That sounds like a challenge I’m sure some raptors would be willing to engage in.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

My uncle has chickens and birds of prey and raccoons are the biggest causes of their deaths. He solved the larger bird issue by running some kind of chain-link fencing over the top of their enclosure. Keeps the chickens in too. Raccoons still occasionally find a way through though.

King Hippo

this makes sense I am not really sure a cat -even a feral – would fuck with a chicken. Never really seen mine (and I have parented some predatory motherfuckers) shy away from anything winged bigger than a songbird.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Cats are mostly lazy.

King Hippo

I’ve had some that killed squirrel in tandem, which impressed the shit out of me. And almost every cat I’ve had takes bird killin’ as a nigh-religious calling. At least until they age out of it, around 10 or so.

blaxabbath

Like every house on my street has a feral cat (plus all the other ones that travel through the alley), they literally all sit in their respective front yards every evening. I could see once of those dicks just walking down the wall, jumping in, the dead bird flying out and either getting wounded or killed in the backyard outside the fence.

blaxabbath

Hmmmm. I googled it and I guess we have some racoons. We got coyotes around here sometimes (there is a golf course not far away) and all the animals seems to be coming to our area because we have irrigation so all the big trees and lawns are green and wet.

Yeah, I was thinking I was gonna have to cover it. I guess I can — I just think it’s an eyesore and any amount of work; which is more than I have time for currently .

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also, I think it’s rather interesting that domestic animals are often bred to be as stupid as possible, so they won’t be able to figure out how to escape.

blaxabbath

Chickens are unbelievable. We got like five and the first two went in pretty quick order. I was pretty bothered until my wife had a patient who had grown up on a chicken farm and his job was to go out every morning and toss out the dead ones — and everyday there were dead ones. They don’t fear the right things (they aren’t afraid of the lawnmower) and are brittle as shit. Like, I really don’t see them as pets at all. I mean, I like them fine and care about the well-being of a creature living under my care but, come on, they’re basically ornamental.

King Hippo

the term “bird brain” has its genesis somewhere

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Reading this makes me feel like I’m in a time machine.

King Hippo

good thing is when the zombie apocalypse comes, we noe where to get a good chicken dinner before the mass suicide!

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

My late mother-in-law (who I loved dearly) once told me the secret recipe for authentic Hungarian Chicken Paprikash

Step 1: Steal a chicken

JustStopDude
JustStopDude

I fucking cannot stand the number of cats in my neighborhood that people let wonder freely. They will have collars.

I can’t even roll my parrot’s cage out onto my patio because the goddamn cats will try to attack her.

Wakezilla

More depressing shit about my trip from hell:

Mrs. Wakezilla’s father was more of a sperm donor than actual father (he didn’t come with the family as refugees when Mrs Wakezilla was 8), and has been dead for 15 years. Anyway, he was a serial cheater. What we didn’t know until this trip, however, was that when he was a high-school teacher, he was having sex with 14 year old girls in exchange for good grades. Fucking piece of shit.

Mrs. Wakezilla is pretty messed up about this. Is there such a thing for counseling offspring who has a parent who was a sexual predator?

herodotus450
herodotus450

Well just remember bad parenting is nothing new, comment image?cb=1371092346
at least we have running hot water now though.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Adventures of Huckleberry Finn is the greatest novel ever written, along with Catch-22.

scotchnaut

It’s like you’ve never even heard of Tolstoy, Dostoyevsky, Miguel De Cervantes, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Faulkner, Joyce, Proust, Kafka or Cormac McCarthy.

LemonJello
LemonJello

I don’t watch the NBA.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Wow. It’s a good thing the U.S. has civilized since the 1840s.

ballsofsteelandfury

Yes, there is such a thing. I don’t know how things work in Canadia and your free health care, but you should absolutely make an appointment with a mental health professional, if you can.

King Hippo

I’m almost 99% certain that is indeed a thing, if in a city of any size. I’d find some sort of advocacy or support group with decent roots in the community, and ask for recommendations.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Start with Al-Anon (they’re for family survivors of addicts) and work your way out from there.

King Hippo

I worried Demaryius’ contract would render him untradable, except to the goddamned P*ts. Thrilled to get a 4th and (as I understand it) around $4.5M of cap relief that can be rolled into 2019.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I heard he wanted to retire as a Donk, so I imagine he’s probably not thrilled about going to… Houston? Is that right?

King Hippo

I wasn’t even sure they got the Oilers back, but good for them I guess. Maybe he frees Hopkins up a bit more for me in fantasy.

Think DT was professional about it either way, though whispers were he wanted NE, very glad Our Equine Lord and Saviour said no. I’d take the 500’s 4th over a 3rd from those pricks.

Wakezilla

Reason #98483727 why Calgary sucks: No one here gives a shit about Halloween. The hell, Calgary? I know we have lots of bible thumpers here, but still, where the aethiests at?

I see more Christmas stuff than Halloween stuff. It’s some bullshit.

herodotus450
herodotus450

Isn’t Canadian halloween on September 31st? Aren’t all holidays just moved up by a month on account of the light or something?

King Hippo

I am a man over age 11. I must agree with Calgary’s TAEK here.

Wakezilla

Not for me, but for the children

King Hippo

yeah, if they don’t do it for the wee lads and lassies, that’s some bullshit

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I should get a big bag of candy at Costco tomorrow.

Oh, and maybe do something to celebrate Halloween.

scotchnaut

/watching ‘Darkman’

It’s interesting to see Liam Neeson before his acting options were thrown to the wolves.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

“I used to watch him too, before he got cut.”

–Chip Kelly

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I always get Liam Neeson confused with that other guy.

scotchnaut

Trent Green : [to agent] “Can I sign anywhere too?”

Agent: “Uh… Sure. Why not?”

Green: [makes ‘blow job’ sign]

Agent: “Trent, I’ve told you at least a dozen times that’s between you and me.”

Green: “Sorry, Marlee. My memory isn’t what it used to be.”

herodotus450
herodotus450

I wonder if he tried to give her $130,000 out of habit when they met. comment image

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Seahawks released Brandon Marshall, who is now free to sign wherever.

Wait, which Brandon Marshall are we talking about?

herodotus450
herodotus450

No one’s entirely sure, including Brandon Marshall.