Your “Is ‘Friends’ On? Thursday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Beerguyrob

A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Beerguyrob

Of course not. Anyone with parents over the age of 60 knows Thursday are the domain of “The Big Bang Theory”,

Yay

and “Little Sheldon”.

Boo

NFL News:

  • The Jets have done the Jetsiest thing they could do and hired a coach who could only beat them when in his previous gig. Jets fans: Adam Gase is now the Jets head coach.
    • He’ll be doing for Sam Darnold what he successfully did for Ryan Tannehill.
      • Darnold is on-board with Gase, adding “I’m really excited to work with him because of all the good things he’s done.”

  • Based on the Gase decision, Mike McCarthy has removed himself from contention for all other openings.
    • He said it was New York or nothing for him in 2019.
      • So he’ll sit at home and collect the $8 million the Packers owe him for the one remaining year.
    • That works for the Bengals, since McCarthy’s previous salary of above minimum wage meant Mike Brown was never considering him in the first place.
      • Who apparently have their eye on current Chiefs OC Eric Bieniemy.
        • Which should assuage the Fritz Pollard Alliance, an organization comprised of scouts, coaches, and front office personnel in the NFL as well as other sports professionals committed to equal opportunity in the industry.
          • They lament the current 0-fer in available openings for minority hires.
            • Especially with the Jets hiring Adam Gase, because “look at the fact Brian Flores coming out of New England. New England has dominated the AFC East over there. And Brian Flores would probably know about the Jets more than anybody.”
  • According to ESPN, here’s who the Packers also talked to and/or interviewed before settling on Matt LaFleur:
    • Patriots offensive and defensive coordinators Josh McDaniels and Brian Flores (pictured);
    • Saints offensive assistants Dan Campbell and Pete Carmichael;
    • Buccaneers offensive coordinator Todd Monken;
    • former Dolphins head coach Adam Gase;
    • Chuck Pagano;
    • Jim Caldwell (pictured); and
    • Packers interim coach Joe Philbin.

It looks like A-A-Ron dodged a few bullets with the LaFleur hiring.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL: Winnipeg, Toronto, Edmonton & Vancouver are all regional broadcasts in Canada
    • Capitals at Bruins – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Jets at Wild – 8:00PM | NBCSN
  • NBA:
    • Celtics at Heat – 7:00PM | TNT / TSN
    • Thunder at Spurs – 9:30PM | TNT / TSN
  • NCAA:
    • Mens:
      • Cincinnati at Tulsa – 7:00PM | ESPN2
      • Michigan at Illinois – 8:00PM | FS1
      • East Carolina at Memphis – 9:00PM | ESPNU
      • Penn State at Nebraska – 9:00PM | ESPN2
      • UCLA at Oregon – 9:00PM | ESPN
      • Washington at Utah – 10:00PM | FS1
    • Women’s:
      • Louisville at Notre Dame – 7:00PM | ESPN

There are only two official coaching openings left – Bengals & Dolphins. Honest to God, I don’t know which one is more attractive. SUCKERS BETS!

Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Brick MeathookALXMACMr. AyoSonOfSpamWCS Recent comment authors
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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I’ve got some awesome homemade Maryland Crab Soup here, and also some hearty (and healthy) lentil soup as well. Just hold your USB cable up to your mouth and I’ll send you some, just tap on your space bar thrice when you are ready.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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ALXMAC
ALXMAC

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

This post reminds me that I was re-reading Caesar’s Commentaries the other night, and man did he tell a funny story.

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC

ALXMAC
ALXMAC

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Now this is what I call “big titted”
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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

That’s the biggest blower I’ve seen since I last saw your mom.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

The Good Place cast is too damn good looking.
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WCS

There’s a reason they’re in the Bad Place.

/hasn’t seen the new season yet

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I see that Tim Marchman is trying to get sued now that there’s no Drew around to yell at him until he’s a puddle.

Gratliff

Twitter is extra horrific tonightcomment image

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Why

Gratliff

Sheer fucking insanity from Texas where local GOP members are attempting to remove a party chair, because he’s Muslim and they’re concerned he may be a terrorist.
https://www.star-telegram.com/news/state/texas/article224180505.html

Sharkbait

Isn’t that a typical Thursday in Texas?

WCS

If the dipshit doesn’t get the message his fellow Republicans are sending, fuck him, too.

Gratliff

Pretty much. It’s still staggering sometimes how willing these fucks are to show the world who they are. Not even the pretense of not being shitheads.

SonOfSpam

Didn’t realize he was a Republican. Maybe the Muslim GOP can join forces with the Log Cabin Republicans and become Queer’an Republicans.

Sharkbait

I wish I was an unsuccessful NFL head coach. $8 million to sit on my ass and do nothing? Sign me up.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I want to drink but I still have the sniffles. How do I justify this?

WCS

Alcohol kills germs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“He’s more disease than man now. Like some kind of Germ-man.”

SonOfSpam

“Germ-man is so sick. he can’t climb up into a random space to fix the insulation; he’s anti-some-attic.”

Fuck, that wasn’t worth the effort. Sorry.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can’t go a different room because my wife is waiting just outside to give me a hard time about forgetting to do some chores. She is always hall-accosting me like that.

SonOfSpam

The worst is when you’ve taken so much pain medication, your senses get completely dulled; like, you stub your toe and don’t even react. You’ve lost your ouch-wits.

WCS

AKA: The Hippo System

SonOfSpam

Referring to your condition as “the sniffles” limits your beverage choice to Zima.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[grabs bottle of scotch]

“That’ll show SonOfSpam.”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

(nice work, sir!)

SonOfSpam

Here to help!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wine is just grape juice

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Col. Duke LaCross

Shefty reporting Zac Taylor to the Bengals.

Yay NotHue?

herodotus450
herodotus450

Tipsy-canoe-driving-Vontaze-Burfict and Taylor too?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can’t wait for some team like the Bills to name an umbrella that Sean McVay once used as their new offensive coordinator.

Redshirt

I’ll believe it when I see NotHue being introduced. I’ve learned my lesson at the casino not to count my winnings while I’m still playing. I’ve gone from “Yes! Up $500!” to a painfully furious silent drive home several times.

herodotus450
herodotus450

litre_cola

What an album. Amazing that they were 16 years old when they made it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Left without comment:

It’s twelve o’clock, and it’s a wonderful day
I know you hate me, but I’ll ask anyway
Won’t you come with me, to a place in a little town
The only way to get there’s to go straight down
There’s no bathroom, and there is no sink
The water out of the tap is very

Hard to drink
Very hard to drink

You, wait til tomorrow
You, wait til tomorrow

You say that money, isn’t everything
But I’d like to see you live without it
You think you can keep on going living like a king
Ooh babe, but I strongly doubt it

Very hard to drink
Very hard to drink

You gonna wait til, fat boy
Fat boy, wait til tomorrow
You gonna wait til, fat boy
Fat boy, wait til tomorrow

You, wait til tomorrow
You, wait til tomorrow

You gonna wait til, fat boy
Fat boy, wait til tomorrow
You gonna wait til, fat boy
Fat boy, wait until tomorrow

herodotus450
herodotus450

The water out of the tap is very
Hard to drink
Very hard to drink

Didn’t know they were from Flint.

litre_cola

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rockingdog
rockingdog

last funny:

Whoa! the lineup for Bonnaro seems strange…
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Don T

Ginger Kombucha and an IUD, please.

Don T

And a side if methadone for the Full Marinovich.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

An IUD is what you get when Steve Keim looks at his court paperwork upside down.

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

There are no good NYT opinion editors or writers.

I don’t trust Crooked Media dogs any more that their owners, and I will never trust those cretins.

King Hippo

Tonight is the season/NBC premiere of Brooklyn Nine-Nine aka Parks and Rec with cops.

Perhaps I shall exercise tomorrow with it on the DVR?

/MOAR likely just lie around in my shame

litre_cola

Good tune, poorly chosen band name

rockingdog
rockingdog

Jammin!

Redshirt

Classic Superman vs. Movie Superman is a lot like Fantasy vs. Reality

http://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/8/3/2/512832_v2.jpg

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m quite proud to be able to say, honestly, I have never and would never watch “Young Sheldon”.

I want to punch adult Sheldon, actually.

herodotus450
herodotus450

The BET spinoff “Yung Shelldunn” about his brief rap career is actually pretty good.

King Hippo

oh, did everyone else not get their first choice of available head coaching candidates? What a pity! 😀

/huzzah Evil Genius and triumphant return of Shave Our Pubes FOAR Kubes!

King Hippo

Today, I found myself thinking ahead to daily baseball games. A horrible and chilling thought. Helllllooooo, major depression wave.

rockingdog
rockingdog

found a funny:

I can’t stop thinking about how if a baby were a werewolf it would turn into a puppy.

litre_cola

I left -27 F and came home to 45 F, I was an hour and a half flight away in the same province. Oil money will make people live in stupid places.

ballsofsteelandfury

There is absolutely nothing wrong with “The Big Tits Theory”!

scotchnaut

“Actually, given my most recent experiments-sometimes they are there and sometimes they are not. One can’t be completely certain. Pamela Anderson was an interesting test subject though.”

-Erwin Schrodinger

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

The theory in action:
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SonOfSpam

Somewhere in this great land of ours, someone is currently excited that “Young Sheldon” is gonna be on in a while.

That terrifies me.

herodotus450
herodotus450

I thought Jerry Sandusky died?

SonOfSpam

You’re thinking of his enabler. Good ol’ Jerry is getting rhythmically slapped in the showers at State Pen.

litre_cola

I thought he died too.

Redshirt

This is a legitimate argument against protecting the environment and ensuring the survival of future generations.

Redshirt

https://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2019/01/10/the-great-cincinnati-mystery-could-end-in-eric-bieniemy/

Good. They’re probably waiting for someone in the playoffs. Hue isn’t in the playoffs. Its not going to be Hue. Its not gonna to be Hue.

Its okay. Its okay. Itsokay.Itsokay.Itsokay.Itsokay.okay.okay.okay.okay.okay.kay.kay.kay.kay.kay.kay.

WHO PUT THIS SKIN ON MY ARM?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Redshirt

I’ve heard two names, both not named Hue Jackson. Responsible for the Chiefs or Rams offense, plus Jarod Goff’s development. I’ll take it!

Local paper’s reporting it. Looks legit.

https://www.cincinnati.com/story/sports/nfl/bengals/2019/01/10/cincinnati-bengals-hiring-head-coach-nfl-mike-brown/2511983002/

herodotus450
herodotus450

Eric Bieniemy played for the Bengals as a RB back in the day, I believe. So he can’t even claim ignorance about Mike Brown’s incompetence.

Redshirt

He did. 1995-1998. He was the Change of Pace RB for Harold Green, Garrison Hearst and Corey Dillon.

That’s why I’d be shocked if he goes to Cincy. I’m hoping they had Katie Brown-Blackburn and her husband do the interview as a way to say “Don’t worry about Brown. He’ll be dead soon.”

WCS

You’re not that lucky.