Your “Having An Elite Day” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • The big, bland, elite news of the day is the Broncos agreeing to a trade for Joe Flacco.
    • It won’t be official until March 13, the start of the league’s calendar year.
      • If I understand the salary cap (Ron Howard voice: “He doesn’t”), trading Flacco only costs the Ravens $7.0 million against their cap, and with Lamar Jackson still on his rookie deal, they get out from under having to pay Flacco while being able to add tools elsewhere in the lineup.
    • Case Keenum is guaranteed $7 million for 2019, and up to $18 million if he’s still on the roster opening day, so the Broncos have to dump him into a buyer’s market.

  • Ian Rapoport was busy this morning, also speculating that the Steelers have until March 17 to trade Brown before salary bonuses start kicking in.
    • Which doesn’t make sense, since yesterday the story was that the Steelers would be saddled with a $21 million cap hit if they move him before June.
      • It seems like paying $2.5 million on March 17 would make more sense than absorbing a $21 million deduction from the 2019 roster, but what do I know?
  • The Haslams are quite upset with ESPN about the story last week discussing internal dysfunction and Jimmy’s hands-on role in it all.
    • Upset to the point that they’ve cancelled a Flying-J ad contract with ESPN that had two years remaining & believed to be worth low-to-mid seven figures annually.

Tuesday was the first “snow day” in Vancouver in 10 years. “So,” asked no one in particular, “how did you spend your day, Beerguy?”

Well, I settled in for a movie marathon,

and in-between took the dogs out for walks in the snow, looking for shots that would make WineWife forget that I did zero chores.

   

At one point, Riga decided she’d had enough of Lambeau’s guff, and proceeded to give him what-for.

After dinner, we settled in to watch the Westminster Dog Show,

and by the end of the day we were all pretty tired, so we went to bed early.

All told, a day well-spent.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Oilers at Penguins – 8:00PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet
    • Canucks at Ducks – 10:30PM | Sportsnet
  • NBA:
    • Wizards at Raptors – 7:30PM | TSN
    • Rockets at Timberwolves – 8:00PM | ESPN
    • Warriors at Trail Blazers – 10:30PM | ESPN / TSN
  • NCAA:
    • Providence at Villanova – 6:30PM | FS1
    • Clemson at Miami – 7:00PM | ESPN2
    • Richmond at VCU – 7:00PM | ESPNU
    • Georgetown at Seton Hall – 8:30PM | FS1
    • Texas Tech at Oklahoma State – 9:00PM | ESPN2
    • Vanderbilt at Florida – 9:00PM | ESPNU
    • Arizona State at Colorado – 10:30PM | FS1

Guys…GUYS! I saw the uploaded photos for the next edition of Sunday Gravy. GONNA BE TASTY!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m not an expert, but I think those are good dogs.

yeah right

Book recommendation via Horatio Cornblower.

“The North Water.”

Give it a go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtR8e_uf_s8

Brick Meathook

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Gratliff

Man, I’m struggling with the reality of my dipshit countrymen going to bat for the South America genocide guy way more than I should be.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

my dipshit countrymen going to bat for the South America genocide guy

You are going to have to be way more specific.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Whoa, startled me.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

FUN FACT #1: Yvonne DeCarlo was a year older than Al Lewis, who played her father.

FUN FACT #2: Al Lewis had always lied about his age to make himself seem older.

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I’m going to the DMV tomorrow for the first time since I passed my behind the wheel test at 16, and all set to get my REAL ID. I made my appointment back in December, and the earliest I could get an appointment was 4 days AFTER my license expired.

I’m bringing along:

Current passport
Original Social Security card
Current vehicle registration
Medical bill (as a back up)
$42 in cash AND a check made payable to “Department of Motor Vehicles”
Semen sample
Knife (as a deterrent)
Proof of sanity
Plenty of cigarettes for Patty and Selma

I think I’ve got this covered.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWvU4lY7yKI

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Proof of insurance?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Wasn’t on the checklist, but I’ve got that too.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, whew. It seems like they don’t really care about the rest, as long as Farmers covers your fuckups.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Aw SHIT. Mine’s Mercury…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

May God have mercy on your soul.

It’s not too late to screw that chimpanzee.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

It’s not worth being responsible for the next Donald Trump.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That pic of the GOOD BOY watching TV is fantastic.

rockingdog

presidential funny:

Happy birthday Abraham Lincoln who was perhaps best known for making the OOWAHAHAHA sound at the beginning of Down With the Sickness.

Brick Meathook

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I laughed way harder at that than expected

litre_cola

My home province. Classy.comment image

rockingdog

Happy timberwolves fans are happy! good win over Houston rockets going into the AllStar break.comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

Found the warriors vs blazers nba game stream on reddit. Cool!

Ian Scott McCormick

The Brooklyn Nets win in a classic triple overtime game against the…you know what? It doesn’t matter who they beat. It was a sanctioned NBA game and I don’t have to defend their strength of schedule or margin of victory to you.

litre_cola

THIS IS A NETS HOUSE.

Ian Scott McCormick

I’ve spent three hours watching this game. That is way too long to watch any basketball game. That’s like a five hour football game.

litre_cola

You are doing the Lord’s work.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Are you a damn netpicker?

Senor Weaselo

Could have been worse. Could have been a 20 point win over the Knicks.

Ian Scott McCormick

There should be double wins if you win by 30+. You get two wins. The other team gets two losses. You’d really start to see some intense games when somebody needs to pick up a few games in the standings.

Brick Meathook

This is good thinking. Also, as a veteran, I should get two votes in every Federal election.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No way; that’s how we got Trump.

Brick Meathook

I don’t agree with that. Don’t stereotype the average veteran, they’re mostly not what you think.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I was kidding about the double vote thing you big dummy.

rockingdog

NICE!

Brick Meathook

Don Barzini’s grave, Westwood Memorial Park, Los Angeles

It was Barzini all along.

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Gratliff

lololololol
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Senor Weaselo

But is 125-1 an ELITE number?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, that’s pretty funny.

Don T

Going from Keenum to Flacco is like finding a better JOI site.

King Hippo

/does NAWT look that up

litre_cola

No ones drives it like the owner. I don’t need to be yelled at.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Pull it over, Mister.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Judging from some of your recent comments you may need it.

Gratliff

So a life changer?

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I went back to work today after taking a small vacation for my birthday, and my boss says “Oh I thought you were coming back tomorrow.”
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Brick Meathook

You should’ve told him you only came in to steal some pens.

WCS

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Gratliff

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Sigh. Tonight sucks cause I’m starting a new workout regime where I’m not allowed to get hammered every other night anymore. One old-fashioned is all I get this evening.

WCS

What if that one drink was this?comment image

rockingdog

Gahhhhhh!!!!!!! I HATE reading these case studies my teacher gave me for my marketing class about instances where brands were successful in building “Brand Awareness” and “engagement”.
It just feels so slimily, and mischievous, and uncomfortable…. eh…
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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Senor Weaselo

Yooooo, Harbin beer is legit. Haven’t found it back home, only Tsingtao.

Brick Meathook

Now find some Only Puke

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

A marketer with scruples?! Have you considered…. Economics?

scotchnaut

Hippo, I’d like to accuse your Pack of putting saran wrap on the Cuse rim but I know my Orange all too well.

King Hippo

Weird game between weird teams having weird seasons. WEIRD!

herodotus450

Storage Unit Show really stepped up their game, now there’s four things to look at in every episode.

scotchnaut

Despair, Greed, Crass Opportunism… What’s the fourth one?

herodotus450

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scotchnaut

Any pic of Brandi Passante is worth three cartons of Pall Malls in Pelican Bay State Prison. I mean, that’s what my mom said repeatedly during our last conjugal visit.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You’ve provided plenty to unpack in that well-worn suitcase.

Dolph Ucker

Wouldn’t that make it 5 things to be looking at?
/she’s too good for Jerrod

Gratliff

me: corporations are never your friend
nintendo: hi
me: this one… this one is my friend
nintendo: feed me you fool
me, feeding nintendo money directly from my wallet: of course my friend. down with capitalism

— it’s kiko! (@royalpizzaboy) June 14, 2018

https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

rockingdog

I saw that funny. That’s a good one.

Gratliff

but Link’s Awakening remake, man
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Senor Weaselo

Paging Yahtzee Croshaw!

herodotus450

“And now Pierre MaGuire’s interview with the coach…” will probably be the last words I hear before blowing my brains out some day.

King Hippo

Well, Other Hippo, looks like we’uns out of Vicuprofen!

litre_cola

Is that a German spaetzle like dish?

Gratliff

I love this shit. Like, I expect the Reagan era ghouls who crank it to the idea of dead children in US-backed coups to shrug off the responses pointing out specific human rights atrocities committed by their buddies, but how do these dumb motherfuckers sit there and watch the responses roll in and just think “nuh uh. he was a good dude, and that overrides doing a genocide.”

I was a career FSO and later Obama appointee, Elliott Abrams was a kind, thoughtful, non partisan mentor. Let's try to see the best – rather than the worst – in people. @IlhanMN https://t.co/aLg1CG02Yq

— Dave Harden (@Dave_Harden) February 13, 2019

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The first sentence of his war vulture org’s About Us page: “The senior leaders of the Georgetown Strategy Group have dedicated their lives to improve the human condition.”

lol go fuck yourself

herodotus450

My TV volume skips from 3 to 5. The perfect sound level? Four.

scotchnaut

“TV?”

-my Nigerian orphan that I recently cut off

/he promised to write once a month! A deal’s a deal, damnit!

litre_cola

His uncle is till going to get me that money I promised him right? I did give him all my details.

scotchnaut

There’s a thread over on BigBlueView (Giants fan site) that was yakking about the worst period of extended time when QB’s sucked. The time before Simms showed up, the time between Simms retirement and Eli starting were brought up and then someone mentioned the last six years under Eli.

W/L: 47-60
No Division Titles
One Playoff Appearance
No Playoff Wins
Three Winning Seasons
2 Fired HC’s
3 Fired OC’s

One wonders-what is the sound of one Eli fan clapping?

Gratliff

BBV is a top 5 schadenfreude visit

SonOfSpam

Sounds like a Slinky going downstairs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Dogs really are the best.

scotchnaut

-Foodies in Hanoi

King Hippo
rockingdog

very good. I remember the 2013 highlights video like it was yesterday!
when he interviews the mile-high horse penis….. LOL!
“Big Dick Decker” LOL!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFadG0w2UNI

King Hippo

Giving up a fucking 4th rounder for Joe Goddamned Flacco makes Hippo feel:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSykbE9yd1o

rockingdog

found a funny:

[my dad is in the backyard motionless gazing off into the distance]

wife: what’s he doing

me: oh, there’s a long standing tradition in my family

her: what is it

me: i… just… told you?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s an old bartender’s trick; you send the new employee over to a different bar to get “the long stand”.

scotchnaut

As a new dishwasher hire, I was asked to run over to another restaurant to get a ‘Bacon Stretcher”. I almost went. Like, ‘took off my apron and noticed a line cook smirking’ almost went.

SonOfSpam

Well, congrats on the new job anyway!

scotchnaut

It don’t pay as well as lickin’ toilets but the food is better.

Brick Meathook

Davie & Granville, Vancouver BC
November, 2006
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SonOfSpam

Your dogs are awesome. My Newfoundland also likes to watch DogTV whenever available. He’s never seen snow, and I should remedy that someday.

WCS

/pours one out for Mars rover Opportunity

Gratliff

The ending of Punisher S2 was fantastic. Solid use of Alice in Chains and full on not giving a fuck.

scotchnaut

I get 5 other fucking college ball games but not Cuse/Wolfies. #fuckyou

King Hippo

ah just may have to quit yeeewwww, Canadia

King Hippo

/also check to see if streaming on “theacc.com” – I don’t think it’s country-limited like ESPN3…

litre_cola

On your crazy cable package??? I assume you get Devry and University of Phoenix! Go fightin Fitzgeralds

scotchnaut

The Live Tsunami Channel makes up for some shortcomings as far as coverage is concerned but I WANT TO WATCH MY CUSE!

ballsofsteelandfury

Were Lambeau and Riga dismissive of the dogs in the Show?

If I was them, i’d be barking shit all day!