Your “Dreams & Schemes” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Congrats everyone – we made it to the weekend.

Not a lot going on this weekend on the Beerguy front. Just trying to keep the doggies cool during the mini heat wave we’re experiencing up here.

Billy Idol actually played up here during Spring Break. It’s now “Billy Idol and Steve Stevens”,

and they’ve aged a bit. But whatever the name, the music was still solid. They played at the Vogue theatre, which holds about a thousand people, and it was a great time.

As a musical aside, if you have seen “Avengers: Endgame”, you’ll know another reason I quite enjoyed it was because they included a deep-cut Kinks song.

Again, it was 10/10 & perfect fan service for this guy.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • St. Louis at San Jose – 8:00PM | NBC / CBC / Sportsnet
  • MLB:
    • Yankees at Rays – 6:00PM | Sportsnet1
    • Nationals at Dodgers – 9:10PM | MLBN
  • NCAA:
    • College Lacrosse: Robert Morris at Virginia – 7:30PM | ESPNU
    • College Baseball: Indiana State at Dallas Baptist – 9:30PM | ESPNU
    • Women’s College Softball: SEC Championship – 8:00PM | ESPN2
  • Fútbol:
    • Liga MX:
      • Tigres UANL vs. Pachuca – 7:30PM | UNI
  • Fights:
    • PBC Fight Night:
      • Hurd-Williams (super welterweights) – 8:00PM | FOX
    • UFC 237: From Rio de Janeiro – Namajunas vs. Andrade
      • Prelims – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN4
    • Top Rank Boxing:
      • Main Event: Berchelt-Vargas (super featherweights) – 10:00PM | ESPN / TSN5
  • NASCAR Sprint Cup Series:
    • Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Race at Kansas – 7:30PM | FS1 / TSN
  • Australian Rules Football:
    • Fremantle vs. Richmond – 3:00AM | TSN2

Other programming:

  • PBS: The Great British Baking Show – 8:00PM
    • Mary Berry will absolutely cut a bitch.
  • Showtime: Wu-Tang Clan: Of Mics and Men – 8:00PM
    • Season 1 • Episode 1 • Episode 1
      • relevant:

  • NBC: SNL: Emma Thompson; Jonas Brothers – 11:30-ish (due to length of hockey)
    • A week late for the Sandler episode, but I couldn’t find a version I liked until this the other day.

Enjoy your evening.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Emma Thompson is still alive. Who knew?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Stop spying on me!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Howard?

Wait, that’s Lea Thompson.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

IR pegging. Bruce Timm is quite the vanguard

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

I’m gonna try to do a 10k thingy again tomorrow. Knee is wonky as fuck but I’m on a roll. Okay, I’m not on a roll. [sighs] I’m not even on a bun. Please don’t tell my wife-her ciabatta cheques stopped coming in two weeks ago. I remember the days when we swam in starter yeast! Those days are long gone. I rue the day the Super Bakeries merged and slowly but surely began limiting our choices.

Sure, you can get all the pumpernickel you want on the black market but it’ll cost you at least 3 butter knives per loaf. And they call this progress! Please, join the #nowhitebread! movement now-before it’s too late!

herodotus450

Pump fer a nickel? That’s a good deal.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

It’s a hard knock loaf.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

#whitebreadgenocide is real

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh dear God. Earlier I made some garlic aoli and now I’m making some hard-boiled eggs. I was thinking I should put some of the aoli on one of the eggs.

Then I realized I would be making a mayonnai-egg.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tO1k2Y3o-iM

WCS

After reading that, I don’t feel so good, either.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

She may be talking about sperm….. not sure.

Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo

Stop spying on me!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Can I just say cutting things as a lefty sucks? Like cucumbers, for instance. Still doable, but it’s annoying because I know the blade’s not happy.

WCS

Someone needs to visit the Leftorium.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

When Casa Weaselo (okay, Apartment Weaselo) becomes a thing, I’ll have to have at it. Except at that point it would probably be the move-in point, and Senorita Weaselo is a righty.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Don T

?

Senor Weaselo

These St. Louis Blues, I call them 99.2% of R&B musicians because things aren’t going too well for them right now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

-Insurance company

yeah right

Two minor lessons learned from cooking Sunday Gravy:

You can freeze ginger for one additional use.
You can’t do the same with dill.

This has been a public service announcement.

scotchnaut

“Live and learn.”

-that religion that does that thing where you come back as something else and do something different and do something else after that and after that it’s the same thing after the other thing and then I imagine it gets boring after awhile.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

But eventually you achieve a perfect state.
So you’ve got that going for you.
Which is nice.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo

I would lose at least three fingers, and possibly one arm, if I tried that.

herodotus450

Just like I can’t tell the difference between Jet and The Strokes, Jay Bouwmeester and Dion Phaneuf are basically the same person in my mind.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450

“We’ve said the Blues won’t go away, and they haven’t.”
Yeah, yeah, I hear ya, hockey talkingguy.

Mr. Ayo

It’s almost as if both of these teams are good!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He needs to try Cymbalta (duloxetine); the company that makes it says it works great.

herodotus450

So many cucumber gifs tonight that now I’m seeing Vlasics on the teevee

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, let’s switch it up.

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Brick Meathook

SATURDAY NIGHT!
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

IT’S BEAUTIFUL, MAN! BEAUTIFUL!
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scotchnaut

“Your sublimated Peter North fantasies have been noted, categorized and cataloged. You’re welcome.”

-Your Friendly Neighbourhood NSA

Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

More pussies and cucumbers than FTV.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Things I encountered while walking the dog today:

A busted garbage can that was garbage itself.

A perfectly serviceable garbage can that was left on the curb for anyone to claim (I claimed it).

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Meanwhile; three blocks over.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo

Someone needs to remind her she has TWO hands. smgdh

Unsurprised

The redhead on the left killed a six year old and she’s still a better person than Rose McGowan.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Never forget our national heroes.

Unsurprised

The last person to serve him?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, see, you want to jump behind the bar BEFORE you get shot.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sometimes the best laid plans (i.e.: NFL season)……

herodotus450

Hockey talking guy: “Sharks are buzzing now.”
The last thing you want to hear if you’re Jacques Costeau

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

“Sharks are bouzzing now,” on the other hand, would be words by Jacques Clouseau!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Here’s how the rabbi does it.

scotchnaut

Is the real appeal circling around “Tombstone” is that it addresses male friendship? Otherwise, it’s a pedestrian movie.*

*I love this movie

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Disagree; that pizza sucks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

This scene had some steaming hot man-on-man male friendship:
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450

Hockey talking guy: “5 on 3 is tough.”
Oh really?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Fucking pussies.”

-Sasha Grey

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Mr. Ayo

Pavelski out there juggling the puck

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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herodotus450

The last time there was a two-man advantage in San Jose in front of 19000 spectators was… probably earlier today.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

/Gets in shower
/Takes shower
/Gets out of shower
/Turns on UFC fights
/Sees Clay Guida fighting BJ Penn

How about that? My shower is a time machine and we’re back in 2011!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

No, no, we specifically said hot tub!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xeSwrFKFNFw

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ArmedandHammered

So that is what a food porn orgy looks like. I would have expected more bechamel sauce.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m just glad they weren’t pancakes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Stupid sexy pancakes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

it’s true! Cats:

1) Do not abide by vegetables; and

2) Defy the laws of physics

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

My last cat would eat broccoli, but he was a bit odd.

King Hippo

wow, and that’s a vegetable’s vegetable

/and mine will eat the Sheba “chicken and vegetables” wet food, God only knows what that actually contains, though

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

goddamned Dirt Yinzers

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Distant cousin of Cabbage Head?

scotchnaut

So fucking absurd. (that’s the way I like it)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxB_Hs2cXiE

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Yanks-Rays are about to clear the benches after CC drills someone next inning.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Dammit, CC’s gonna get tossed for hitting another Ray in retaliation now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

It started off good, and then it got better.

Horatio Cornblower

ARE YOU OK!? ARE YOU OK!? ARE YOU BLAM!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

too bad this would be hard to banner.

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yeah right

I just want to go on record and say washing a cucumber is an entirely unpleasant experience.

King Hippo

guess it depends on what you done with it first ,, smh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

#tastysalad

yeah right

Just brought the thing home from the store.

Got to admit you can see the allure for females.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Are you really that homophobic or is there some childhood trauma involved? This is one of the fucking weirdest things I’ve heard (here anyway).

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I guess I should assume you are joking; that way it makes sense.

King Hippo

yeah, that is how I took it, playful self-deprecation

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yes, it’s got to be a joke. My bad, except for the baby carrot pile on.

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King Hippo

baby carrot were also funny

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

Hippo gets me.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It was this followup that threw me off. The sarcasm font was off.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

She seems nice.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You just lost your cook’s license.

scotchnaut

The whole of your adolescent life prepared you for the experience. What’s the? Oh. I get it now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

He’s much better with baby carrots, though.

scotchnaut

That’s just mean. smh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

The reason I was driving back into town was because my youngest is trying to get with a girl that is way, way out of his league “right now”. I don’t have the heart to tell him that she’s just using him and his insecurities to get things. Better to say nothing and have him learn a hard lesson.

King Hippo

this is excellent parenting (seriously)

Horatio Cornblower

Let me know when you want her to disappear.

What? I’m a part-time magician.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’ll be tough enough on its own; good call by not making it worse by making him think his dad doesn’t believe in him.

Unsurprised

Can you be my dad?

Horatio Cornblower

I’ve been outside pretty much all day. It is now time to shove some raspberry pie into my gaping maw, take a shower, and start drinking beer.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

Played a “cat and mouse” chase game on the highway up to my town with a young blonde girlie. I ended up in front of her as we came into town and she waved at me and gestured for me to pull over. I gave her the ‘Peace’ sign and shook my head ‘no’. Felt guilty about the whole thing so I drove directly to the hardware store and bought a new bath tub plug for my wife.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

For a story that starts with a highway flirtation and ends with a guy buying a plug for a woman, it’s disappointingly unsexy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

If he’s not careful the stopper could turn into a butt plug.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

I laughed.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

this guy Scotchy? HE FUCKS!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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“Taint No More!”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Chris Davis still sucks.
That is all.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

“What has Andy Reid never said at a Seafood Buffet?”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh