Your Minnesota/New Orleans Wild Card Game Open Thread

Well, now it’s the NFC’s turn to show us what they’ve got.

TO THE GAME!

Vikes/Saints:

-I don’t know, man. Poking around here, there and everywhere it just does not look that good for Minny. I guess an extremely heavy Derrick Henry-like dose of Dalvin Cook and a smattering of Mattison might slow the game down a bit. Perhaps another Diggs miracle at the end to for the win? I can’t see the score being close enough to matter.

-Hey, you know that fantasy thing you employ when you have Brees? You know, play him at home and forget about him on the road? Well, I did a wee bit of maths and his completion rate at home this year is 77%. Wr Thomas will likely be covered by Xavien Howard and that fella allows a catch rate of…. 84.3%. That spells disaster. The Vikes don’t have a cb in PFF’s top 50.

-“But Minny’s D has shut down a number of qb’s!” says yeah right. Well, yes-they’ve done quite well vs. backups and strugglers like Chase Daniel, Daniel Jones, Case Keenum/Haskins, Matt Moore, Kyle Allen and David Blough. They’ve been torched by the more capable tossers like Wentz (400), Stafford (433), DAK! (443) and Wilson (444).

-Shall we speak the name of Cousins and his enormous struggles in national spotlight games? His won/loss record for games on Sunday/Monday nights and playoff games is 2-16. It begs the question-has he been to a therapist? If so, he should think about switching it up and going to a more effective one. And he want to trade in that therapy badger, he’s so cranky!

-Prediction Time! Saints win going away 37-20.

Hit me with yours down below. Or just hit me.*

*tire irons are excluded from this offer

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King Hippo

aaaannnnnnddddd…..SCENE

Mr. Ayo

PI review!

Old School Zero

Cousins moving to score so fast you’d swear pornhub’s algorithm was involved

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Banner.

King Hippo

has that toss play worked all game?

Dick E. Phuck

Ohhhh SHITTT

Gatoraids

Time to put taysom in on defense coach

blaxabbath

OT eh?

The NFL actually needs to shorten their season to about six weeks and then get to the playoffs.

Gratliff

SWEEP THE LEG JOHNNY

Horatio Cornblower

Holy shit Thielen.

WHERE THE FUCK WAS THAT DURING FF SEASON!?!?!?

King Hippo

Saints need a TO here

Fronkenshteen

No huddle!

rockingdog

Good call on the banner quote…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KezvwARhBIc

Redshirt

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King Hippo

It’s not that we CAN’T do our taxes. It’s that we DON’T WANT TO.

Horatio Cornblower

“Man, he always calls heads.”
-The Irish

Bortleback

He liked to call heads, tails, and everything else too

theeWeeBabySeamus

OK, why is this pussy breathing oxygen from a mask? You’re in New Orleans, it’s below sea level, you’ve got plenty of oxygen. Learn how the atmosphere works dickhead.
Just breathe it.

Doktor Zymm

Maybe it’s nitrous

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hmmmm, interesting point.

Mistborn Impossible

Holy shit this makes me so mad

Redshirt

More oxygen inhaled helps them to recover/repair between players. They can’t do it too much because it could make them sick, I think.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Two words.
Free Radicals.

Game Time Decision

Comme on hail Mary lol

Game Time Decision

Why take the knee if you’re just going to kneel on the next play

WCS

BANANACAKES ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED

BrettFavresColonoscopy

OT wooooooooooo

Gratliff

So close to hilarity

King Hippo

We shall have Extra Taysom Time. Sound the horns, angel Moroni!

Horatio Cornblower

Fun fact, I got that guy’s name wrong on Jeopardy.

Went with Gabriel.

King Hippo

Silly Gentile! – 90% of Utahns, in unison

Redshirt

Why don’t you use your timeout here? This is Scott Norwood range here.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Why do guys wear eyeblack in a domed stadium?
And why do black guys wear eyeblack at all? Seems redundant.

Discuss.

Redshirt

Lights create glare.
Unless they’re skin tone is black-black, the eyeblack would attract the lights.

Horatio Cornblower

If you think that I, a middle-aged white guy, am going to discuss any topic that begins with “why do black guys…” you are out of your cotton-picking mi….

Ah, fuck.

Horatio Cornblower

“You do have Drew Brees, I understand that” says Troy, clearly having paid no attention to the game so far.

King Hippo

just like Tony, with Dreamboat’s bollocks in his mouth last night

King Hippo

even MOAR poor by Sean Payton. The fuck??

rockingdog

Will Will Lutz be the savior for Da Saints?

rockingdog

And so he was

Horatio Cornblower

“Hey, don’t boo me you mouthbreathers, it was your dumbass O-line that moved around on the spike!”

Mistborn Impossible

So do we all agree that the refs have done a solid job today?

King Hippo

quite

Redshirt

This sudden competence is jarring.

Doktor Zymm

Amazingly yes

Dick E. Phuck

Agreed and I like your username

King Hippo

That was really poor by Breesus

Gatoraids

Vikings playing defense lthinking it takes 3 days for Brees to comeback

rockingdog

Jared Cook making his case as the best TE in the league now that GRONK is gone….
Dude.

Redshirt

Are they saving Hill for the FG attempt?

King Hippo

OL wasn’t set

ArmedandHammered

Are they playing the prevent D?

ArmedandHammered

Whatever it is, it ain’t working.

LemonJello

Tiffany Rivers sadly agrees.

WCS

Is yeah right shitting diamonds?

herodotus450

I’m no Andy Reid, but in retrospect it seems like that Saints timeout was completely wasted and didn’t save any time.

King Hippo

you are correct, needed to use both timeouts, or zero

herodotus450

Das what I thought, but it would mean Troy was right about something…

theeWeeBabySeamus

Delayed screen to Kamara for 60. FG for the win.
You heard it here first.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Of course that means OT.
Don’t wake up my mother.

Redshirt

(urge to make “She had a long night last night” joke rising)

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehehe.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Well, I called the right play, but it only went for 6, not 60.
Meh, can’t win ’em all.

rockingdog

Ahhh the memories….
You have come a long way my man.

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King Hippo

Every game has been closely contested at the 2-minute warning.

litre_cola

Just said that to Mrs. Cola.

Mistborn Impossible

Best wild card weekend in years. I have Seattle blowing out Phily next though

King Hippo

you’d think we have to get one turd

WCS

That was some… shall we say, interesting play calling, Vikes.

King Hippo

Would YOU trust Dingleberry ahead of that defense?

Doktor Zymm

The refs are gonna need an armed escort out of the city

Horatio Cornblower

They’ve been right on the calls.

Which I’m sure will make a huge difference to the enraged Saints fans who corner them in the parking garage.

Old School Zero

“But I was technically correct!” I scream as I am drowned in a bucket of frozen cocktails

Gratliff

This was true with a Saints blowout

BrettFavresColonoscopy

They’re goes my parlay

theeWeeBabySeamus

23 just went back to 17 really fucking fast.
Way to go replay officials. You didn’t even make us wait too long.

Game Time Decision

Don’t want this game to interfere with the late game. Got keep it moving

Gratliff

Everyone in the stadium is just gonna leave the stadium and walk directly into the gulf

rockingdog

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King Hippo

this is the internet’s best picture

Fronkenshteen

And you can’t even see the boogie board.

Doktor Zymm

Well, that was unexpected, I was thinking it would be an interception

King Hippo

When will the stink of two rotting corpses alert the neighbours right?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Knee was down, down by contact. Sorry ‘Aints.

Dick E. Phuck

Knee was down, that’s not fun at all

Redshirt

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

Gratliff

oh thank god