Your “It’s Not Collusion If They All Agree” Monday Evening Open Thread

NFL Nuggets:

  • The league owners are having a conference call on Tuesday – in lieu of their cancelled Spring meetings – to debate & vote on the third wild-card game.  
    • It’s widely expected to pass, as it generates additional revenue for them.
    • According to Albert Breer, the league has negotiated contracts with CBS and NBC to broadcast two new wild-card games.
      • The deals would be approved after the playoff format passes.
    • According to professional chili eater Peter King, there had been consideration for a 2-3-1 format, two on Saturday, three Sunday and one Monday night.
      • Unlikely, because a team would come out of the first playoff weekend playing a short-week divisional game.
      • He would expect a possible Monday night wild-card game to come up in future years, however; the difference in rights fees switching from a 1:05 p.m. Saturday game to 8:15 p.m. Monday would be substantial.
    • They are also going to vote on extending its streaming agreement with Amazon through the 2022 season.
  • Allegedly, Tom Brady reached out to the Bucs.
    • When they called him on March 18 – and NOT EARLIER, despite rumors to the contrary – it was Brady who apparently made the sales pitch for him to join Tampa Bay.
      • He liked their receiving corps, and felt Bruce Arians’ playbook would allow him to “open up” his arsenal.
  • An actual signing!
    • Geronimo Allison is leaving the Packers All-Name WR Corps & going to catch flutterballs from Matt Stafford.
      • Allison has agreed to a one-year contract for the veteran’s minimum of $910,000. He will also get a $137,500 signing bonus.
        • He took league minimum to get away from Aaron Rodgers? Rumour time!

Today’s internet good dog is Lambeau, because he was sad I had to go back to school today. Now, it was only for an hour, and only to pick up teaching materials, but he was very sad because I’ve been home & a solid dog companion for two weeks.

To show you how good, here he is posing atop three metres of snow last week.

So handsome.


Tonight’s … entertainment?:

  • Antiques Roadshow – 8:00 PM | PBS – From the Desert Botanical Garden in Phoenix, AZ.
    • Items featured include a Cartier jadeite pendant necklace and original artwork by Kanye West.
  • Whose Line Is It Anyway? – 8:00 PM | CW
    • Guest star appearance by Amber Riley.
    • It’s not the classic episodes from the 90s, but still has genius from Messers Brady, Mochrie & Styles.
  • Cops – 10:00 PM | PAR – new episode
    • A suspect bails out of his friend’s car when deputies catch him making a shady move; a nervous driver preemptively denies ownership of all his clothes; and a man’s decision to fire off some rounds puts his neighborhood on edge.
  •  Wrasslin’:
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • the “go-home” show before the two-night, empty arena Wrestlemania this weekend.
      • FYI – a true descent into hell is trying to read wrestling sites & fanboards trying to glean information about what’s what.
        • I know we shit on U****x a lot, but Stroud at With Spandex does a very admirable job sorting all this noise out.
      • Anyway, the card as currently divined looks like: (lineup courtesy Bleacher Report). Match odds are here, because you can gamble on the outcomes. HAIL GAMBLOR!
        • WWE Championship Match: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar
        • NXT Women’s Championship Match: Charlotte Flair vs. Rhea Ripley
        • RAW Women’s Championship Match: Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch
        • Smackdown Women’s Championship Match: Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi
        • Bone Yard Match: The Undertaker vs. AJ Styles
        • Smackdown Tag Team Championship Ladder Match: The Miz & John Morrison vs. New Day vs. The Usos
        • WWE Intercontinental Championship Match: Daniel Bryan vs. Sami Zayn
        • Last Man Standing Match: Randy Orton vs. Edge
        • John Cena vs. “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt
        • Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley
        • Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins
        • Elias vs. King Corbin
        • Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler
      • There is also supposed to be a Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns match, but that’s up in the air since Reigns is still immunocompromised due to his leukemia & pulled out of attending.
        • The Street Profits also have a title match, whose opponents are being revealed tonight.
        • The Smackdown Tag Team Championship Ladder Match between The Miz & John Morrison vs. New Day vs. The Usos is also up in the air since Miz has been quarantined.

Apologies if there’s too much wrestle-talk for some of you. But I hope those who follow do appreciate. Plus – GAMBLOR options for the weekend. You need something else to do besides taking Seamus’ fake money at poker.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dunstan

That coronavirus test IS nasty.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Just slowly pulling the circles of the venn diagram apart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yikVjssdzNM

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dunstan

Fuck this “out like a lamb” shit. This has been the longest March since the Bataan Death.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NWjRmfnmIk

ALXMAC
Viva La Tabula Raza

Mao Zedong and his Long Marchers would beg to differ.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The Cherokee, Muscogee (Creek), Seminole, Chickasaw, and Choctaw nations would like a word.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Ha! We deed eet own pooorpoose.”

Napoleon’s army leaving Moscow.

*please say in terrible French accent.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Ha! We did it on the way THERE!”

-Hannibal’s army

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m starting to detect a trend here.

Gratliff

Last week, they had Matt Hardy teleporting through the arena with hilariously smash edited footage and the Inner Circle at ring side in carnival caricature artist format. Hopefully, AEW continues being goofy as fuck. Wrestling is always best when it embraces stupidity.
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Horatio Cornblower

Better Call Saul and Dispatches From Elsewhere is quite a nice one-two punch for Monday night.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Can’t we all just get along?
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ALXMAC
Viva La Tabula Raza
herodotus450

This is like me when i fall asleep holding my slice of pizza

Viva La Tabula Raza

I hope that for you it always lands topping side up and crust side down.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ALXMAC
ALXMAC
theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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herodotus450

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Unsurprised

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Hope he has changed his “twitter handle” to Matt “The Dang Nostradamus” Christman by now. Although I’ve been saying since he announced his candidacy that if he became the US’s 45th president, he would also be the US’s last president.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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WCS

What is, “What Anthony Facui Says to Donald Trump Everyday”? Thanks. I’ll take American History for $1600.

Gumbygirl

Oh Christ, it just occurred to me that this shit is going to be in the history books someday. How embarrassing is that?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Kitty Wrasslin’
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

It’s all fun and games until a fetal alien bursts out of your chest.

Unsurprised

Then it’s just fun

Unsurprised

No one expects a jet of real animals guts and blood hitting you in the face.

Viva La Tabula Raza

That was a brilliant move by Ridley Scott.

Unsurprised

Only surpassed by the stunt guys on Die Hard dropping Alan Rickman early.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Who’s a good boy? Lambeau is a good boy.
(psssst….Lambeau, bring Riga too… we’ll be across the border before he even knows you’re gone)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

I just watched this again. One of them grabs her crotch.

Mr. Ayo

Shooters shoot.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Man, that actress was so hot. And apparently clinically insane, from what I have read.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I think she has her problems and substance abuse, but in the grand scheme of things she’s not running a country or any felony convictions. Casting for that role was perfect IMO.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza

Now binge-ing 4 seasons of something called Grand Tours of the Scottish Islands on Amz Prm. Very relaxing and I get to see a part of the world that I now know I will never get to see in person.

Dunstan

Going to add that to my list, even though I have been to Islay and Skye (which are great).

Viva La Tabula Raza

Looking at the episode guides, both of those are covered, Skye a couple of times…
And a quick use of the Google indicates he has a whole of bunch of travelogue shows like this. So I can watch shows about Scotland whilst I drink too much Scotch whiskey.

Gumbygirl

We lived in Scotland for three years, it’s my favorite place in the world!

Viva La Tabula Raza

Holy Loch? I think I recall your saying your husband was USN.

Gumbygirl

Yup. We were there to the bitter end. We would have stayed longer but they closed the base. The Simon Lake was the tender then. My husband was also there for two years before we got married, on the Holland

Viva La Tabula Raza

I was WestPac, MR2, so more familiar with Samuel Gompers, Proteus, and Frank Cable. I was attached briefly to USS Jason when I was in the reserves.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Remember traffic?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The good old days when we had pigs on the merry-go-round.

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Redshirt

Today is the 81st anniversary of Batman debuting in Detective Comics #27. Proof that a person can accomplish great deeds as long as they have over a billion dollars, no parents and no therapy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

All I’m missing is the billion bucks.

Dunstan

Batman: because the problem with society is that the police have TOO MUCH respect for the Constitution and don’t beat criminal enough.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

Found a funny:
Pigeons probably think we’re extinct

Gratliff

A history of hats
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Senor Weaselo

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Dunstan

I feel like the Village People really went downhill when they expanded their lineup this way.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’ve got oranges, I’ve got pineapple, I’ve got grenadine syrup, I’ve got rum.

IT’S MAI TAI TIME, BABY!

Sharkbait

Fuck yeah! That is on the list of cocktails to make

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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SonOfSpam

Also we have proper spring weather all week.

Dunstan

OOOH YOU SO FANCY!

(I like getting to do that to other people.)

Unsurprised

oranges, I’ve got pineapple, I’ve got grenadine syrup

Well, you won’t get scurvy. But what do they have to do with rum?

Gratliff

A history of lists
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Gratliff

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Col. Duke LaCross

The moss covered, three handled, family gredunza!

Sharkbait

*Checks Twitter*

Why the fuck is Mr. Pillow trending?

*Checks trend*
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SonOfSpam

Timeline is getting more stupid by the minute.

litre_cola

I just did the exact same thing.

Brick Meathook

Mr. Pillow is only trending on Twitter.

herodotus450

*Doesn’t check Twitter*
*Nothing*
*Feelings of moral superiority increase*

SonOfSpam

You banned from there too???

Brick Meathook

Self-banned, yes.

Redshirt

Me too. I only joined and made two of three tweets to get a badge from the pre-crisis, before times.

Redshirt

My bing search engine is coming up empty. Either that or the answer is so stupid that my computer is refusing to show it.

WCS

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Sharkbait

Can’t be any worse that what we’ve got now

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Marked improvement; qualified federal judge appointments instead of Liberty “University” graduates.

SonOfSpam

No one ever says Italy.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Why not both?” – coronavirus

Gratliff

Also sometimes hard to remember they debuted Owens on Raw by having him murk Cena before going over him clean as a whistle in his first main roster match, followed immediately by having Owens lose to him like 43 consecutive times, but still! He’s one of the few things I actually miss from WWE.

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herodotus450

Getting scored on by McCarty should probably discredit Roy from the Hall and nullify at least a few hundred wins.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vR-E0zLh_pg

WCS

Saul Time, baby.

Redshirt

NBCSN is airing a 2006 Week 1 game between the Colts and the Giants.

Wake me when we get to 1997. I want to see Boomer Esiason’s last season. I listened to it, but it was blacked out.

Gratliff

Daniel Bryan vs. El Generico–Retired luchador operating an orphanage in Tijuana/Sami Zayn’s vaguely problematic indie persona–At Proving Grounds 2009. Sami’s hug pose is the stuff of legends.

Gratliff

Also will never miss an opportunity to share the apex of low budget indie video packages
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6hp4X-cVKs

Redshirt

Reason 1,047 why Football is Superior to Baseball: They aren’t re-airing two year old baseball games, even in late-March.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2018_Kansas_City_Chiefs%E2%80%93Los_Angeles_Rams_game

Redshirt

Wrestling is the only reason to go to That-Shite-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named. If they were airing with a crowd, I’d suggest we do a DFO Invasion on the Raw After WrestleMania Open Thread just for fun.

Senor Weaselo

So Jomboy’s breaking down BattleBots, including The Rakening. I let Will Bales know it existed on the Shuntposting forum. I feel cool.

(I’m not cool.)

Don T

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rockingdog
Unsurprised

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rockingdog

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Unsurprised

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scotchnaut

“Okay, maybe some people are now walking in LA.”

-Missing Persons

Redshirt

Wait a minute! Los Angeles is a city?! I thought it was a stationary area of smog.

Unsurprised

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King Hippo

Belarus Premier League will be back this weekend too!

/side-eyes razor blade, forearm arteries

scotchnaut

Is the Belalugosi Premiere League still playing games? I’m totally addicted to it!

litre_cola

You scoff. I now am familiar with Honduran futbol and am betting on most games. I may have a problem. I am not to the point to know players but I do inow teams and their current form.

scotchnaut

I’m not a scoffer. I’m genuinely impressed that you’re drilling this far down on heretofore unknown soccer leagues.

litre_cola

There is two left and we both have been doing quite well, for now.