With the way things are these day my diurnal rhythm is completely messed up. I’m lucky if I know what day it is, let alone what time it is most of the time these days.
Now part of that is due to the fact that my mother fell a few weeks back and when she did she somehow managed to knock my big clock off the wall and break it. I was going to go get another one but it didn’t seem necessary all things considered right now. I’ve still got the time on the microwave and the coffee maker.
Then we had a power outage. Well shit.
And frankly I’ve been too lazy to reset them. If I want to know what time it is I either have to find my phone or boot up the computer.
Not that it matters anyway. I have no particular place to be on any schedule currently.
–
Time For Sports…Or Maybe Not
NFL
Of course the big sports news this week is the NFL Draft. Well, I suppose it’s almost the only sports news. At least that which anyone cares about at the current TIME (see what I did there?).
NFL Draft Round 1 Results (with CBSSports Pete Prisco’s grade)
You’re On The Clock!!!!!
(Hehehehe)
- Cincinnati – Joe Burrow QB, LSU (A)
- Washington – Chase Young EDGE, OHIOST (A)
- Detroit – Jeff Okudah CB, OHIOST (B)
- NYG – Andrew Thomas OL, UGA (B+)
- Miami – Tua Tagovailoa QB, BAMA (B)
- San Dieg….errrr… LAC – Justin Herbert QB, OREG (B)
- Carolina – Derrick Brown DL, AUBURN (A+)
- Arizona – Isaiah Simmons LB, CLEM (B-)
- Jacksonville – CJ Henderson CB, FLA (B+)
- Cleveland – Jedrick Wills Jr. OL, BAMA (B)
- NYJ – Mekhi Becton OL, LVILLE (B)
- Oakl…errrrr…Los Ang…errrr…Oakl…errrr….Las Vegas – Henry Ruggs III WR, BAMA (A)
- Tampa Bay – Tristan Wirfs OL, IOWA (B)
- San Francisco – Javon Kinlaw DL, SC (B-)
- Denver – Jerry Jeudy WR, BAMA (B)
- Atlanta – A.J. Terrell CB, CLEM (C+)
- Dallas – CeeDee Lamb WR, OKLA (B+)
- Miami Again – Austin Jackson OL, USC (C+)
- Vegas Again – Damon Arnette CB, OHIOST (B)
- Jacksonville Again – K’Lavon Chaisson EDGE, LSU (B+)
- Philadelphia – Jalen Reagor WR, TCU (B)
- Minnesota – Justin Jefferson WR, LSU (A)
- LAC Again – Kenneth Murray LB, OKLA (B)
- New Orleans – Cesar Ruiz OL, MICH (A)
- San Francisco Again – Brandon Aiyuk WR, ARIZST (B+)
- Green Bay – Jordan Love QB, UTAHST (D)
- Seattle – Jordyn Brooks LB, TXTECH (C+)
- Baltimore – Patrick Queen LB, LSU (B)
- Tennessee – Isaiah Wilson OL, UGA (B+)
- Miami with the hat trick….ooops wrong sport – Noah Igbinoghene CB, AUBURN (A+)
- Minnesota Again – Jeff Gladney CB, TCU (B)
- Kansas City – Clyde Edwards-Helaire RB, LSU (B-)
There you have it. And of course rounds 2 and 3 are tonight. Rounds 4 through 7 tomorrow.
But you know what I say? FUCK ROUNDS 2-7. Won’t be watching. Last night was boring enough And I feel like I wasted my TIME (Hehehehe).
MLB
MLB is now discussing a new plan. Previously they were going to try to play a full season with all teams in Arizona. Now it’s expanded to include not only Arizona but also Florida and Texas.
The TIMING of their plan is up in the air (Ha! Boom!).
Also, A-Rod and J-Lo (come on you twits it’s TIME to start using your real names) are trying to buy the New York Mets now (man I am on fire).
–
What Time Is It Anyway?
TIME foar teh sexy I guess?
If there’s a clock of some sort visible, it’s fair game this week.
Enjoy…
Not gonna lie. I still don’t know what TIME it is.
Oh, that might help.
–
Have a great weekend everyone. Remember to wind your clocks.
Love ya’s.
–
PS: Aren’t you glad I decided not to post Green Day’s Good Riddance (Time of your life)? Well don’t get too excited too fast…
Be well and stay safe everyone. Tell those you love that you love them while you still have TIME.
–
And how about The Monks?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63Agrr2qC78
Time is a concept but what is now cannot be now later. Things just happen and that is time, fella.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNS6D4hSQdA
Nothing replaces a good bass line.
Nothing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp21F4fimkc
Or a heartbeat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vddl9TK5RqU&list=PL3PhWT10BW3Urh8ZXXpuU9h526ChwgWKy
A pacemaker?
Happy Friday people!
Friday doesn’t mean shit anymore.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1B6LrOmNsg
Time for a scotch
naut?
Ook?
You gotta be drunk enough to sell that joke but then no one thinks it’s funny.
Unless everybody is having coffee in the morning. Granted; it was only funny to me, but it was fucking HILARIOUS.
dumbass!
OOK!
I have always loved the Kinks. You Really Got Me was the first song I ever recognized on the AM radio while driving around in the 1949 Dodge my mom got for ten bucks when my dad bought a house in suburban Sacramento in 1963.
I saw them in San Diego in 1981 when I was waiting to start my A School at the Naval Training Center there off Rosecrans Avenue after having graduated boot camp in June 1981. I asked a fellow boot [George Pierre Vilaro, a disco boy from Manhattan who had a 54″ chest and was a Golden Gloves boxer, but the same height as me when we formed up for marching in formation. We were both in holding companies (Me for MR A school, him for BEEP school) and became very good friends over the course of that short period of time] across the bridge at NTC San Diego, and I said “Hey George let’s go see the Kinks. They did “You Really Got Me” originally 20-odd years ago.” He said Bullshit, it was obviously Van Halen that did that song. Anyway we went to the show and had a blast.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bylvUvbP14
My fave Kinks tunes are Waterloo Sunset
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_MqfF0WBsU
and Celluloid Heroes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp_QkUVZGPc
Among many others that I won’t tire and bore you with. God Bless the Kinks.
I love them too. Ray Davies is such a smartass! I saw them in the late seventies, at the Stanley Theater in Pittsburgh. This was I think their first tour in quite a few years, because the Davies bros hated each other, and would have fistfights on stage. They held it together that night, and put on one of the best shows I have ever seen.
They played the US festival, 1st version.
I fell asleep to “Way-ooo”
They were so good.
I was in the Western Pacific by then, but looking at the bands playing on the given days, I probably would have gone for Day 1, when two of my all time favorites Oingo Boingo and Talking Heads were on the bill. Tough choice, because Day 2 had my other faves, the Kinks and Tom Petty/Heartbreakers.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/US_Festival
They were like the pre-cursors to the Gallagher brothers in that Oasis band. “I HATE YOU. FUCK YOU!”
The Gallagher’s wish! If you twisted my arm, I couldn’t pick an absolute favorite song, but Waterloo Sunset, Sunny Afternoon, Apeman, and Polly would be in my top ten. And Lola…Dandy….Dedicated Follower of Fashion….
Drunkenly: * I love you!*
No – God Bless You. Of course, my feelings on the topic are well known ’round here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrmQB38aT5U
I don’t think any of us celebrate, but Ramadan Mubarak!
I’ve spent more of my life than I would prefer in Muslim countries, and Ramadan/Eid is just fucking insane. But not as insane as what we are seeing here in this country from the Trumpistas.
I don’t think it’s much crazier than Lent/Easter when done with conviction. Especially if you can sleep all day and eat all night
At least it changes dates on the calendar.
Best circumstances for a strict observance on the other hand.
Woah, she reminds me of Linda Cardelinni
Pictured: All my exes with their small throats.
Sometimes I have those fantasies too, nothing to be ashamed of.
Also don’t forget the pooch like this loser did.
James Franciscus was a badass.
Why is it that Madeline Kahn and Bernadette Peters both so do it completely for me? I’m not even into blondes or redheads that much.
They are beautiful and smart and funny and talented and only one of them is dead.
So that’s enough, innit?
Absolutely. Thanks for the validation.
I mean, what Spam said and they’re both objectively good looking. And buxomy.
Attractive + Comedy Boner = Sperm in your possum suit.
Done.
Now where do I get a possum suit?
It can be synthetic, or you will need a LOT of possums. Either way; you’ll need to sow a lot.
I’ve finally figured out that if I participate here over the course of an evening, I lose at least three hours of streaming/viewing various PBS and BBC documentaries. But I kind of feel like it’s worth the sacrifice. Folks here are pretty fun to hang out with. And some pretty funny shit gets said. Though being an old sometimes makes it a bit confusing, translation-wise. But y’all seem fairly amenable to explaining obscure shit to me, for which I thank you.
Well fuck you too cockbite.
PBS and BBC are excellent as I don’t need to tell you.
And we love you! (Me and one other person)
See, that’s the kind of joyous intercourse I enjoy having with y’all.
I ain’t pulling out this time.
I honestly did laugh out loud at this response. Scared the dogs.
I just donated to my local NPR affiliate (they’re basically canceling the fundraising drive because Covid after basically canceling the last one because impeachment, soi want to encourage that, also kickass KQED hoodie) and as part of that I get access toa bunch of on-demand PBS stuff. I will have to take advantage at some point, although I’ve been pretty crap at watching tv the past few years
I just watched a 2003 Huell Howser show and I regret nothing. I miss the big ol queen.
I watched a couple of those recently. In one of them he went up with a window washing crew in some tall LA building. He was clearly terrified, but he did it!
You are young and have an exciting future ahead of you. I am old and will probably die in the second wave of the Coronavirus. I encourage you to participate in the future of this country, even if it ends up resembling Mad Max World.
Oh stop. You’re not gonna die until the Great Dude Rape of 2024.
Nothing you can do by the way…nature, she finds a way.
Don’t start sucking each other’s dicks just yet, gentlemen.
(muffled) toof latde
Nice. In fact, excellent.
I’ve still got 150 rounds of .45 ACP for my Model 70 1911. I figure I can probably pick off the first couple of feral Cub Scout troops that come marauding through the Hood looking to pick off some easy supplies. I will save 3 of those rounds for the girls and me when the time comes. Either that or a half gallon of Scotch blend and start the Corvette and the Impala in the garage, me and the dogs go to sleep forever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6gMS7aiMLk
No matter how absurd, you have to mark out your path forward.
Eh, covid is just high stakes poker, you got outs. And I think most people in the US are too out of shape to pull off a Mad max aesthetic
As noted below (or above, fuck I don’t know), I don’t think I want to participate.
THE ARISTOCRATS!
Hi.
Denver just drafted a guy named McTelvin Agim.
Have a nice evening.
Is that a young photo of Betsy DeVos?
She wishes.
Add to that Lloyd Cushenberry III …. The Third drafted in…. The Third.
KUSH
I am half in the bag, working on getting all the way into the bag, and watching 90 day Fiance. I want to go on a murder binge. NOW
I now watch 90 Day Fiance second-hand and it’s as gloriously awful as it could be. Reinforces the notion that Americans are just fucking terrible.
“the cat’s in the bag
and the bag’s in the river”
I’ve enjoyed being in conversations where people talked about 90-day fiancee, I miss those people
So fucking underrated in the hot department.
Add to that the Comedy Boner Factor (CBF).
No argument here. Young Frankenstein had talent.
She is absolutely gorgeous.
Fuck it, it’s Friday, I will have one more scotch and water.
Bottle of wine night in Casa de LaCross.
I started my bottle of cab during our Zoom navy happy hour at 1600. That bottle has been dead for several hours.
Betcha can’t have just one. (Sure it’s a Lays ad but it applies to drinks)
This is number three. Full bottle of wine earlier. Passing out soon.
There are less than 2 pints in a bottle of wine
Fucking Metrification. Goddam you Jimmy Carter!
Honestly, they should have just made Where Have You Gone, Bernadette? 2 hours of this gif.
From the same sequence there is a hip thrusting gif, but I can’t find it right now. I’d add that and then we’d be finished.
I’d just like to share a Cup O’Pizza and my Special Purpose with her. But I know she would just dump me and take off with my special thermos.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-_sDdS-7Ug
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Gc4QTqslN4
She is a damn fine woman.
I strongly DISA……. I can’t eve type that out.
Those are some awesome special effects.
Evening. Made dinner for a friend and his wife who just had a new baby. Pork chops, mashed potatoes, broccoli. Forgot to get enough for lady bfc and me so making a breakfast scramble instead.
You were saying . . . ?
Well aged cheese scores high on both the deliciousness and weird/unnervingness scales
well aged in your fridge: throw it away
well aged in a cave in Italy: charge 1000 dollars a pound for it
These are a bit of both. The serving instructions literally say ‘should mold form, just scrape it off’
They’re hard, funky cheeses so the mold is a feature, not a bug. Stands up to a full-bodied cabernet really well too!
“Should mold form, just scrape it off”
oh no, not falling for that again. That’s how I failed my sculpture class.
That’s how we got the Coronavirus.
That’s how we got penicillin!
I’m allergic to penicillin! So fuck off! 😀
Edit: I ordinarily would not say that to a lady, but since I know you are Navy-trained, I figure it will roll right off your back.
Ha, me too! Also aspirin and nsaids like Motrin. If Tylenol starts making me itch, I’m SOL for over the counter legal pain relief. Fortunately, I have lots of weed!
I’m so happy my guy delivered a full O-Z a while back, plus about 40 doses of scrip Xanax (only use that once or twice a week for help sleeping in on weekends). He called me the other day just to check in, and assured me that he is still making house calls, but I’ve still got enough to see me through till Memorial Day anyway.
That’s good stuff. Any mold on cheese I just cut off. Isn’t cheese made by mold? I choose to think so.
So I had a little splashover when I poured my first scotch a couple hours ago, “I’ll clean that up in the morning.” Just went out to top off, and there is a fucking tiny cricket drinking at the puddle of scotch. I gathered him up and threw him outside, “Fuck off Jiminy, I don’t need you growing to adulthood here in the house and making cricket noises in the middle of the fucking night.”
I rarely kill insects in my house, it’s catch and release at the Casa de Tabula Raza. Even scorpions. However, if a red hornet comes in, I usually try to chase them out an open door, but if they’re too stupid to take their out, it’s Raid time.
Makes you feel any better, that cricket went drinking and jumping in traffic. Tragic, but, just a bad decision.
“Coulda been worse.”
Damn crickets playing ‘How Dry I Am’ on their tiny violins
https://qph.fs.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-57d48f693e4d86f61bed1695d97659c7
Not sure if that picture will show but I was reading about how bees will gang tackle invading hornets and then twitch their flying muscles to cook the hornet to death with body heat. That’s savage stuff there. Good work, bees.
I’m all over bees versus hornets. Bees are like good little socialist mission-essential workers, hornets are like vulture capitalists and members of Jared Kushner’s Pandemic Response Team. Fuck those leeches and everyone that resembles them.
“Quit smackin’ ya tits.”
Diving boards resulted in a lot of injuries and lawsuits, and you don’t see them much anymore these days. The pool in my backyard has one, though it’s a short one that overhangs a 9-1/2′ deep end. Still, it’s been there since 2003 and I won’t use it and I also discourage guests from using it, unless they are kids that weigh in the double digits pounds-wise.
Now tell us what’s wrong with bowling:
Now tell us what’s wrong with bowling:
—Georgia Governor Jeff Kemp
I’d really like to know what kind of car that is in the background, and why it is parked so close to the lane approach/scoring stand/ball return.
I guess you don’t care about the dog.
That’s a puppy. He/she has a long life ahead of him/her. My concern is not relevant, I’m more worried about my increasingly decrepit girls.
Quit blathering, sailor. I’m your peer.
Blathering is what I do best. Please refrain from oppressing me.
Helen Mirren’s Shakespearian trained big tits:
Man she was/is one magnificent creature.
Turn it 90 degrees and it kinda looks like Balls’s avatar there at the end.
*golf clap*
Well played!
Who didn’t have puka shell necklaces 45 years ago. I know I did. Romanian bar owner I know still wears them, though probably ironically. He grew up in Romania, his dad was one of Ceaucescu’s stooges, and he’s one of the only people I’ve ever heard use the word “penultimate” correctly and in context.
Not gonna lie, he totally did it for me when I was a wee Gumbygirl. Gave me something to NOT confess when I was in the box next to the Monsignor. That would have been about a million more Hail Mary’s and Our Father’s at the altar rail than the ones I got for my made up, generic sin list.
I’ll buy that explanation for a $dollar
Ha! I went to Catholic school, and once a month, like the fucking curse, we had to go to confession. The priest at my parish was big on assigning way too many prayers for your penance, and you had to go kneel at the front of the church and say them (silently) so the longer you were up there, your friends would know how hotly you were going to burn in hell.
“With a tongue like a cow, she could make you go WOW.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMdhWRO4-dQ