Technically, Mexican Independence Day was earlier this week, but I can guarantee you that Mexican neighborhoods in your neck of the wood will be partying heavy this weekend. Which coincides perfectly with the girls that you guys chose to post a couple of weeks ago! Today’s pictorial features girls and beer.
Isn’t it great how things work out?
Thanks again to y’all that contribute pictures! I greatly appreciate your input and I think our collective penises appreciate the pictures.
On to Balls’ Thoughts O’ Da Week!
***
Balls is Obviously Into Greek…. Mythology!
I have always been fascinated by Greek Mythology. Those stories were some of the first ones I ever read and they have stuck with me throughout the years. The thing that I particularly love about the Ancient Greek Gods is that they are petty, bitchy, jealous, vindictive, spiteful, and just crazy in general. THEY’RE JUST LIKE US!!
Seriously, I don’t know why the atheists around here don’t just start worshiping the Ancient Greek Gods. They are so much fun and the stories are awesome!
I will take this space each Friday to talk about one particular God or Myth that I particularly like. Before I do that, though, I feel I need to give you all a brief primer on the topic for those of you that went to American public schools.
The video below explains pretty well the overall family tree. BTW, yes I have this chart hanging from my bedroom wall. Call me a nerd, I don’t care.
That’s all for today. In the next posts, I’ll delve more deeply into a particular God, Goddess, or Myth and explain why I consider it to be so fucking cool.
Oh, and one last thing: That Zeus was quite the slut, wasn’t he?
***
For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.
Here are your Top 11 pictures of the week.
***
YOU’RE-A-PRUDE
***
And now, for the music!
As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!
Today we are back to the puzzles! As always, I will give up to three hints in the comments at your request. You try to determine the hidden theme or link between all the songs. Good luck!
Song Number One:
Canción Número Dos:
Chanson Numéro Trois:
Canzone numero quattro:
Canção número cinco
Seigarren zenbakia:
***
That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and fly low and avoid the radar.
test
https://giphy.com/embed/fDO2Nk0ImzvvW
Kel9Ap.gif (480×270) (gifs.com)
For the doubters:
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2021-09-17/earthquake-4-4-quake-strikes-in-carson
It appears Brick was correct. Rough times at his pool.
h
ttps://i.postimg.cc/90wLTMzT/hy8z9LH.gif
That’s wonderful!
Always on the lookout for new music.
Not just a good band but locals.
Pedro and the LBC!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60Rx9_K_Pqw
Hippo gets this.
Anyone here ever tried to sleep with ear plugs?
And woke up missing one of them?
If so, did you ever find it, and if so, where did you end up finding it?
I found one in Brick’s asshole, but only after an earthquake dislodged it.
Hey Brick, do you have an extra ear plug today?
Attention!
Ear plug alert cancelled. I have found the missing ear plug.
Brick was not involved in either end of this incident.
Here’s one for you, Balls
Can you drive theough these states on one highway?
I thought Route 66 was the answer, but one of the videos is titled that. Seems too obvious.
Or…are they all connected, like one touches the next, and then that one touches another, and so on?
Sweet Caroline!
Good times never seemed so good
I’ve been inclined
To believe they never would
BOP BOP BOP
That can happen.
I leave you boys alone for a few hours and you start fussing and fighting. Knock it off, ya little shits, or I’m getting the belt! I did not feel an earthquake, therefore none occurred.
Yeah, a bunch of us in mid-city LA didn’t notice a thing. And my friend is a geologist, so you’re all wrong.
Seems like you’re encouraging us, if I’m honest.
“Go on…” – Michael Hutchence
Howdy fellow degenerates
Ola! Bom Dia!
Howdy. I bet the over on 1.5 likes on your post. Almost there!
I tried to put him over, but it turns out I am already the one like!
I am going to Dislike this that to not beat the spread. In case someone bet on it
Nobody would be that depraved.
/Hippo looks shiftily
It’s your kneecaps. Your body, your choice, champ.
Sisscatchyouwon interception. Returned the ball to the 30 meter line.
there’s a joke about the earthquake being the result of rage at the failed recall election, but it wasn’t in northern California
Imperial County? Those border watchers are crazy.
Happened in Carson. Probably upset that the Chargers are still there.
But Inglewood is not…
Actually Carson is basically south Compton.
But Inglewood..
Shit, man the Clippers broke ground on the new dojo today.
In Inglewood.
I guess I’m saying the Chargers play in Inglewood.
CITY OF CHAMPIONS
Done in Bill Walton voice but sounds better when Chick Hearne did it.
The Matrix + John Wick + Barrell
Armadillo makes a nice evening. Bonus points for my daughter and I getting to play the home version of MST3K.
Mom said it wasn’t a 5, so why did I bother her?
Are you talking about the earthquake or the blind date you setup for her?
Girth. Size queen.
No quake felt here. I guess it was an LA County-only quake.
So there’s a house down the street that has a passionfruit vine, and it’s pretty expansive, so they fall all over the place. I asked the guys in the house if I could grab a few from the yard (they’re painters and I see them most mornings) and they said of course, and then they decided that it was fun to leave a few out on the fence every day. We’ve had more than twenty by now. So I bought them some beer as a thank-you.
That’s just good business.
Hint #1:
You guys are close on the states idea. It definitely has to do with states mentioned in the songs. Now, what is the common thread between those states?
Midwest states?
not states that went for trump!
There’s a lot of Ohio…
But not Ohio
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1PrUU2S_iw
Texted my father who lives in Studio City:
Me: Feel the earthquake at all?
Dad: There was an earthquake?
That was my parents’ exact response.
It was here in the South Bay. You really get the shake based on proximity. And this one was right under Brick’s ass so you know it was a shaker.
Song puzzle. All the songs mention Ohio?
Cleveland more specifically.
A few do, but not all.
Each song lists a bunch of American cities?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ov4epAJRPMw
So I got back in the water today and vanquished my cowardice from earlier in the week. I had one really great wave, a few lesser ones, and got walloped by a few waves and remembered it’s not so scary, it’s just water and…
FRIDAY NIGHT EARTHQUAKE PARTY!
Funny you should mention Zeus, Balls. I was just at the Getty Villa and saw this thing:
I love the Getty Villa!
Holy fucking shit. That was a serious fucking earthquake. Massive jolt.
Ran straight to the tv and the fish tank to keep them upright.
Good evening LA!
My parents in Pasadena didn’t feel it.
Must have been centered by the ocean.
It was pretty strong here. Brief, though.
Carson. Actually south east of Carson. 4.6
It was centered right under my ass
(this has not been scientifically confirmed)
We can start calling it the BrickQuake, if you like. MeatQuake works too. Actually I think I like MeatQuake better.
Earthquake!
Let’s all drink!
Right next door in Carson. Hard ass shake here.
I’m not in CA. Can I still drink for it anyway?
Oh you betcha.
Woo!
UCF-Louisville went full BANANACAKES
I was scrolling up to see the new comments. Holy shit.
and here we see the rare sideboob/underboob combo, executed to perfection
Let me just say that, within the last 24 hours, I’ve:
Eaten at a Waffle House
Eaten Old Bay flavoured potato chips
Gotten food at a Wawa
Dipped my toes into the Atlantic Ocean
Where In The World is Balls San Diego?
Well based on Global Warming and Climate Change, you could be off the cost of West Virginia in a few years.
For now, I’m guessing near Maryland?
Balls is fucking his way through Ocean City,
That’s not a real place.
This may be a cry for help as he an Fozz have been arrested in Baltimore. DFO legal team assemble!
Very close! Just slightly south.
Cape May.
So the Biden Administration pisses off America’s oldest ally who recalls their ambassador.
On that dark Tuesday November night nearly five years ago, I told all of you that you had four years to get your best person to beat that inbred Jabba the Hutt. Is this him? Is this the best you got? I just need to know if I need to get something stronger that liquor.
I’m pretty sure no one thinks that Biden is the best the Democrats have to offer.
He was the only one that could beat Trump, though.
Send a maniac to catch a maniac – Bing video
I’ve said the same many times.
The point of the 2020 election was to beat Trump. The closer we got to the election, the more I became convinced Biden was the only one who could do it.
He was definitely NOT the best from the field of Democrats. But he was the one who got the job done.
But the next goal is to keep Trump out of power. If he gets it back in ’24, God help us all.
He’s too old. If he wanted to run, he’d be more active. Plus, he doesn’t want the embarrassment of losing.
Nailed it. He’s basically leveraging his cult so he can squeeze as much $$$ as he can out of whoever emerges victorious from the primary. And then he’ll hamstring them in the general because he won’t want them to succeed where he failed.
If he gets elected in 2024, I’ll tell you how to apply for a foreign Visa and we can set up the free DFO republic of epic stoned awesomeness and you, well we’ll probably have to fully vet you before you can run for office but you’re welcome to try!!!
1) France thought they were doing the tech-sharing deal with the Aussies, and the Aussies bailed on them for the hotter chick (us). This is the diplomatic equivalent of a hissy fit.
2) You and your ilk spent the Bush years talking about “Freedom Fries” because France correctly thought we were wrong for invading Iraq, so GTFO with that “oldest ally” bullshit.
3) THIS is proof that Biden is bad? Again, I don’t wanna hear criticism from any current or former Republicans ever. Just accept that you spent most of your adult life on the wrong side of things and thank us for keeping our democracy intact.
Sorry Redshirt. That was bitchier than I intended or than you deserved.
Its a Friday. Also, after Trump and the current Republicans, I figure I have about 12 years before I’m can only defend being a Conservative.
It was originally higher than 12 years, but Afghanistan brought the number down a bit. Also, if Biden loses a state, the number gets reduced to zero.
What if he gains two states?
1) D’accord.
2) Actually I was against the war in Iraq (right war at the wrong time for the wrong reasons) and I thought “Freedom Fries” was plain stupid.
3) I have several opinions about Biden’s performance as President, but to avoid upsetting the calmness of the board and start a flaming shit-throwing contest, I mostly keep them to myself. If my views change over time, its not because I’m wrong, its because they evolved.
/hops in time machine
// tells 2004 Redshirt that the President has just irritated the French and they’ve had a hissy fit about it
/// listens as 2004 Redshirt declares that any president who pisses off the fucking cheese-eating surrender monkeys is a great leader
Edit: //// reads the rest of the thread. Sighs. Time travel is confusing.
So my province is the Rona dumpster fire for Canadia. Think Ron Desantis-esque. They have tried to bribe their right wing farmer base to get vaccinated with lotteries, 100 bucks (seriously) all while refusing a vaxx passports so pubs etc can stay open. Well they announced a passport lite which puts the onus on small businesses. They also allowed 3rd vaxxs for the elderly, compromised, aaaaannnnd people that have mix and match and who want to travel internationally!?!? I am a mix an matcher, so I said fuck it I want a third (mostly to be the highlander), and online said it was for travel. They asked me zero questions other than the nurse wondering if I want to go AZ,-Moderna-Pfizer! I decided not to go for the royal flush.
I rolled in and it was all 20 – 30 somethings who fucking knew they wouldn’t get let in to bars. My rant is that, people have fucking died due to this bullshit posturing and THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE WHEN ALSO RIGHT WING QUEBEC WAS DOING IT. I could go on about the Premier of this province but I would fly into a Fozz rage. I will hang up now, thank you for listening.
Ontario and Ford are taking notes and are just a few steps behind you
I don’t mind dreamboat doing ads making fun of himself, but until he starts delving into how fucking weird he actually is, it won’t come with an air of inauthenticity
He’s a total creep. Gives me the willies. Years from now they will start finding the bodies. He has dead eyes, like a serial killer.
He also spent 20 years in a cult. He may not know how to function in society.
“He has black eyes. Like a dolls eyes.”
Capt. Joseph Daniel Votto (@CaptJosephVotto) / Twitter
Col. Joseph Lee Burrow (@ColJoeBurrow) / Twitter
Who needs ESPN when I got the History Channel for game updates. Also, how does Colonel Burrow outrank Captain Votto? I understand his regiment was very depleted, but Votto has been on more tours of duty.
Even on a Friday, we still don’t know what targeting is.
https://twitter.com/LynnBecker/status/1438706280332513282?s=19
NERD!
if anyone cares, i wrote about 6,000 words this week
All work and no play make fozz something something
Are we gonna sit here and pretend he doesn’t contemplate murder on a daily basis even while tripping?
You are a gentleman and a scholar. May death come quickly to your enemies.
in today’s news, we stepped on our dicks again
https://www.wsj.com/articles/u-s-military-acknowledges-kabul-drone-strike-killed-10-civilians-including-seven-children-11631905653?mod=hp_lead_pos1
Whoopsidaisydoodleedoo.
I guess it’s an improvement that we’re admitting fault instead of doubling down on the “well actually” and blaming brown people?
I dunno, man. Seems like a pretty big fuckup, though.
It’s a very big fuckup.
So whose gonna break it to the White House that “better than Trump” isn’t good enough anymore? If Trump’s the Mendoza Line, than I hate to see the Presidents who did worse than him.
There aren’t any, and I’m 100% serious. Say what you want about the Presidents prior to the Civil War, but they weren’t *trying* to destroy the Republic. Only one has ever done that, and it’s somewhat of a miracle that he failed.
The songs are all about methods of travel *
*Wild ass guess
They’re songs about rocks
I’m thinking travel between two or more places. Cities, states.
Gumbygirl has the right idea. She’s close.
Route 66?
also, i’m a few in with my friend Elijah Craig. He don’t judge. He’s my friend.
for what it’s worth, boobs are my sole reason for being alive
So, unrelated to sexy friday, anyone here good with photo editing software? Not necessarily photoshop.
I wanna make a grid style poster with like 7 to 9 images, but all the free apps I use suck, and I cant the images the same size or arranged the way I want
Low Commander would be your guy
So I gotta make a pentagram with some beer, some video game controllers, and Ryan leaf jersey with some goats blood on it to summon him?
That or cosplay as Boltman.
Wow that is scary close.
You’ve been reading DJ TAJ.
The Gimp is the free alternative to photoshop, hard to use but has most of the same features.
i’ll give it a try
Bring back the hot side hot and the cool side cool.
Lookit all that styrofoam. It will be with us forever. It’s lurking in a landfill, looking as brand new as it was in 1985. Archeologists in the future will believe we worshipped a god named McDonald. They won’t be wrong!
Is this McDonald Scottish?
Nae. He’s Rubbish.
Fuck, that’s a new Hawaiian island.
Well, folks, first solo weekend in a while… Lady Maestro is off to a girls weekend, so it’s me time. Just crushed a pizza and some wings, cracked another beer, and immersing myself in the back-to-back CFL games tonight. Plus I just bought myself a new little one-hitter pipe to try out… we’ll see what the fuss is all about with these little guys.
Get in there kid.
Don’t forget to wash the sock.
Before or after?
You know what? Best to just give the washing machine a double workout.
Got my popcorn ready.
but I can guarantee you that Mexican neighborhoods in your neck of the wood will be partying heavy this weekend.
A) Same as any weekend or weekday because fiesta forever
6) No idea what you’re talking about, because everyone knows Mexipendence Day is May fifth (or “Sancho de Panza”)
These songs are all about states or US geography?
Also, Kid Rock and that song are both abortions.
If that’s not it, Its close
It’s very close. What ties the states together?
I have a good idea but in order to confirm this I would have to listen to Shania Twain and I’m just not going to do that.
A modicum of respect is required.
My first guess
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5oGtAKebps
DJ TAJ???
Shania Twain is throwing me off bigly.