For me yesterday was an entertaining mix of interesting games-upsets, disappointments, shootouts, a bizarre finish-even some of the chalk results were worthy of a looky-loo. Let’s do that Monday Thing.
Fall Out:
-It was 4th and 3 on the opponents 39 yard line with 6:29 left in the 4th quarter and your team is losing 7-6. If you’re coach Judge what do you do? You punt it. YOU PUNT IT! I just don’t know where to start with this. First off, the folks that are saying that ‘he’s playing not to lose’ don’t seem to get it. His thinking isn’t that far advanced imo. He’s a dumbass, old school guy that thinks that his D is going to hold the Falcons down and he’s going to win the the field position battle in the end game. Which he was winning when he decided to punt. He was already in the position that he wanted to be in, given his antiquated thinking. Fuckballs! And he preaches discipline and execution constantly to his players and the media and this team saw more flags than the editor of “Triumph Of The Will”.
-The above take forces me to acknowledge that I have to eat some crow. I’ve called a certain guy Coach Booyah! because he’s a wee bit over the top as far as his exuberance goes. Yeah, the Ravens were looking past the Lions and let them back in the game but I’d argue that a typical Detroit team would just roll over and allow the inevitable to happen. There’s no doubt that Dan Campbell is getting his players psyched and motivated to play. And this team is even less talented than last year. (departures of Stafford and Golladay, among others)
-It’s all well and good to go out and draft an rb in order to cure your running game woes. It’s another thing altogether to think that that is all that needs to be done. Najee Harris was out there but The Ben threw 58(!) times yesterday. That’s actually what opponents want Pitt to do these days, right?
-The real story of that tilt is that Burrow and Chase and Co. get a mind-cleansing W. (kudos to those that grabbed Chase in fantasy-a real bargain because the overthinkers caused his ADP to drop so much) Steelers fans (and Redshirt) take for granted that Cincy will get curbstomped on the road and now, maybe, not so much. There be pieces falling into place near the Ohio River.
-Feel sorry for the Bears fans that got exactly what they asked for and now have to wallow in Matt Nagy being correct in that Fields needed more time getting up to speed. Oh, Nagy still sucks balls but he made the right call by holding him out. That’s gotta wound the ego a whole lot.
To The Game!
Eagles/Cowboys:
-Last week Dallas ran to victory but that might be a bit more difficult because so far Philly’s run D seems legit.
-This might be a test of Hurts’ passing skills because it’s fairly easy to air it out against that secondary. He’ll still put those footsies to good use though.
-Shoutout to rook Micah Parsons: In week 1 he played the lb spot and acquitted himself quite nicely. Then last week he switched to defensive end due to Lawrence and Gregory being out and did well there, including an instrumental sack late in the game.
-It’s a bit of older news but La’el Collins is suspended because he offered to bribe The Pee Inspector. For some reason this reminds me of the Dallas press discovering The White House (women and cocaine aplenty there) back in the ’90’s. When Nate Newton was asked for comment he said something along the lines of, “Why are we in trouble for this? We are acting responsibly, bringing our bitches over there instead of back home!” I’m a huge fan of tone-deaf responses to the media.
Do your best or worse down below.
That’s a hell of a catch, and an even worse call. What the fuck were they looking at to call it good in the first place?
If Ol’ JJ hadn’t been such a cockwallet me-first gloree boy and not drive Jimmy Johnson off I’m convinced the Cowboys would have 10 Super Bowl titles now.
And be even more loathed than they are now.
“Hurts to throw!”
Hurts me to watch him throw.
A team based in Texas has a shit-load of players on the Covid list?
ColoUr me shocked.
/waits patiently for “Color me Badd!” response
[is filled with dread as he remembers the time he got in trouble for coloring bad] – Eli Manning
[the incident in question occurred when Eli tried to be helpful by drawing clothes on top of the sketches in Olivia’s “Joy of Sex” book]
Here ya go!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oxu3pq319r0
Oooh! I want to vax you up.
Dallas D looks lost and Jalen waits for them to settle in.
When LeBron started saying “I’ve enjoyed watching a lot of great quarterbacks over the years, Brady and Peyton and…” I was just waiting for him to finish with “oh, and I’ve also watched Eli.”
“There’s your owner!”
Jesus god.
That was unfortunate.
Jerry Richardson looks up from the depths of hell and nods.
If McCarthy wants to head the state fair early and come back in March, that’d be ok. Kellen Moore has this.
I think Kellen Moore gets a college coaching job at the end of the season. USC or some Big XII school.
Nailed it!
— B. Walsh
Zeke wanted that. Ran over 2 birds.
“Bob Ross likes to paint, this might be a draw”
/proceeds to be a draw
That might be the second insightful thing from a sprots talking guy I’ve ever heard
So, is Dallas competent? Or is this a case of the stoppable force meeting the movable object?
The latter.
Dallas’s D is still suspect at best.
I expected Dallas to win this game, especially at home, but I also expected the Eagles to actually show up, and that doesn’t seem to have happened yet.
1.Cowboys offense is outstanding
g. D is improving but still meh
&. Ownership and coaching are bad
“Bob Ross likes to paint; I think this might be a draw.”
With that, I forgive Riddick everything.
Louis Riddick is sure heaping a lot of praise on the Cowboys line that just cost them 10 yards.
This offense is 2010 Boise State. A thing of beauty.
Can Miles Sanders fumble every time he gets a yard, please?
That would have been something, Lebron on the Cowboys.
Peyton just put a PFT Commenter tweet on screen
And he didn’t get the joke!
3rd week in a row.
PFTCommentator getting shoutouts on the manning cast
I’m just gonna come right out and say it:
Timothée Chalamet seems like a little pissant.
Is he the kid famous for fucking a peach?
Then Armie Hammer ate the peach and the peach looked at me.
and then they planted a peach tree in the playground!
I don’t know why they’re surprised about Parsons; if there’s one things kids from Penn State are good at it’s adjusting to unfamiliar situations.
Parsons just grabbed a whole lot of Jalen Hurts ass in that back field
Yeah Dallas is winning this division before Christmas.
This Epps fella can hit.
after the player catches the ball or runs past linebackers for 8 yards.
Eagles Fan: ‘Dallas! We HATE you!!”
Dallas:
Washington Fans to the Owner
Giant Fans to the GM and Coach
I don’t know if I’ve seen a better description of Dallas fans than as drunken, irresponsible assholes who “don’t think about things”.
We are a simple people.
Forgive the edit, I had to show proper respect for how accurate your original assessment actually was.
This coming from a Raiders fan.
/rolls eyes so hard I fall down the stairs.
Hey, those are the same stairs I pushed my aunt down after she snitched on my cousin’s meth operation!
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Truly Americas Team.
Come on Safety for the Safety Gods!
That’s a screwing for Dallas. That was a TD.
That said, that was a shit play call and worse execution.
Great call! I keed I keed, he was in.
Rules Guy: “It feels like a score to me.”
Me: “Thanks, RULES GUY!, Fuck sakes!”
ol’ Processed Ham Head scored twice on that play
This week has been a great reminder that NFL refs suck out loud at doing their jobs.
This week as been a great reminder that I suck out loud at fantasy.
Zeke just killed a bird
The Eli/PeyPey game cast is fucking great. Here’s tonight’s bullshit:
Vasco da Gama got me back to $2100, so not pushing my luck. I said all week I have no read on this week’s NFL slate, just happy that SurvivoUr was easy (CLT to win, Jest to lose)
I haven’t been around for a while but I just reset my password to tell everyone that Peyton said “I hate ball holders”
How does he feel about ‘fondlers’?
I’ll submit a question and maybe he’ll read it on air
Tell that to the training staff, eh?
Eli said Mom told him he was doing great!
lt’s like he reads DFO.
Once he makes his Elis Beach Pail Player of the Week award to player that crumbles in the 4th
I said that to my wife. He fully is aware and it is awesome.
Oh Eli honey, no
lol
That helps the over!
D’oh!
Looks like maybe Philly fans are gonna get a Hurts Donut tonight if the Eagles don’t get their shit in one sock.
Edit: Sudden change!
Little early for bananacakes, but I’ll take it.
Le sigh.
very Nacho like there Jalen.
Giving Peyton and Eli a try tonight. Not sure it’s an improvement, but it’s certainly different.
I actually don’t mind it. They veer closer to early Tony Romo when he was diagnosing plays before they happened in the booth
Their analysis of the Hurts interception was pretty good, and definitely better than the usual “HURR DURR HE CATCHED IT BUT IT WAS THE WRONG DUDE!”
Depends on who they get for guests, gives Peyton someone to play off other than Eli.
I love them
I also love them. This is so much better than chucklehead coloUr commentators.
I do miss the old “Fan Zone” on Fox Soccer Channel and wish they’d do that for NFL games.
Imagine a Steelers fan and Raven fan in the booth together. That would be so stupid and so fun.
Lamb > Eagle
I almost shelled out a kidney for Lundqvist retirement night tickets. I still might, but that will be later in the year, when I can build up the funds so it won’t be as big of a hit
Just don’t sell any of your liver. Some of us might need it someday.
No idea what to think of Jalen Hurts. Full games I watch him play and he looks like early year Sanchez. Games I only see the highlights of a win and he looks like per-injury Bridgewater
I feel like he fumbled too much in big situations in college for me to ever feel comfortable trusting him to the The Guy.
*A-HEM*
Nicely done!
I am tied with my best friend. She has Miles Sanders, I have Greg the Leg. I have placed far too much on Miles Sanders prop bets for receiving, rushing and to score.
Now what Gamblor? Now what??
Sharkette: In bed
Sushi: ordered
Beer: cold
Fantasy matchup: In the bag
How the fuck ya doin?
Hot Damn Suzy is looking good today!
That’s a great color on her. She looks better every year!
LOVE the colour!
She defies all rational explanation, and is FASHION QUEEN.
Really feeling that Bengals win because it actually seems to be the start of more success down the road. Way back when, as a Senators season ticket holder I felt the same thing when I first saw Alfredsson play. He was a 6th round nothing pick that was running the powerplay in the team’s very first preseason game.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFHdVBknfm0&ab_channel=SPORTSNET
The only thing we smoke here Josh, is meat. – Andy Reid
“Pills and booze are totally ok though.” — Britt Reid
<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>[glances in his rearview mirror at the smoke coming out of the three car wreck his reckless driving just caused, shrugs] – Britt Reid</p>— [DoorFliesOpen] (@doorfliesopen) <a href=”https://twitter.com/doorfliesopen/status/1442625210071457792?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>September 27, 2021</a></blockquote> <script async src=”https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js” charset=”utf-8″></script>