[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio

Log In

13 November JV Only Thread the Latter

King Hippo

/

, , , ,

YES, I am indeed super-duper nervous about my Wolven Sort’s match with Wake Forest.  Thanks for asking!

Texas A&M (-2.5) at Ole Miss (7:00, ESPN)

Everyone in the mee-jia is 100% on board with Jimbo Fisher’s Bonfire Cult.  Not that I want to be the side backing Lane Kiffin, but here we are anyway.

Kenfucky (-21) at Vanderbilt (7:00, ESPN2)

Your weekly reminder that Vandy still exists.  Kinda sorta, at least on paper.

Arizona State (-5.5) at Washington (7:00, FS1)

Sparky should protest – if Herm Edwards has to coach their bunch, then the Huskies should have to use Jimmy Lake, too.

NC State (+2) at Wake Forest (7:30, ACCN)

Oh, just fuck all the things already.  Genuinely don’t understand how this gets shit-ass ACCN broadcasting, likely the most important game my Shitty Wolves have played in a decade.

Washington State (+14) at Oregon (10:30, ESPN)

You heard it here first – Hippo is predicting the outright upset here.  Go Cougs!

Nevada (+3) at San Diego State (10:30, CBSSN)

Looky loo, yet another interesting tweaker fixture for the JV BOLTMEN!  Should NC State win earlier, not sure it would be a good or a bad omen for the Wolf Pack.  But it’s deffo one or the other. The above pic came back when I searched photo archives for “Nevada” so I just went with it.

5 3 votes
Article Rating
Tags:

Leave a Reply

Subscribe
Notify of
118 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
SonOfSpam

Dammit, Bruins playing in the 2nd half like they wanna save Chip’s job.

Whatever, will become eligible for Las Vegas Bowl with the win.

1
SonOfSpam

Kansas-Texas in OT is bananacakey goodness.

UT scored to go up a TD in OT, got an unsportsmanlike for celebrating, so KU gets to start from the 12 for their possession.

0
SonOfSpam

KU with the TD, going for 2 for the win.

0
SonOfSpam

KU WITH THE WIN 57-56

HAHAHAHA FUCK YOU TEXAS, BOTH THE U AND THE STATE

2
SonOfSpam

oh you better believe Sarkisian gonna drank chuh chuh

1
Senor Weaselo

Evening lizard people. Dinner with Hermana Weaselo, Senorita Weaselo, and cellist best friend was wonderful, and I would have never believed that I’d have three amazing women in my life who have my back the way they do. With that I’ll do the rest of Senor Weaselo’s 30 for 30 playlist tomorrow on account of there’s Joffre cake waiting for me.

What is Joffre cake? Chocolate layer cake, chocolate buttercream, chocolate ganache. Death by chocolate Romanian style!

As opposed to currently death by covid.

7
SonOfSpam

Glad you’re baller-celebrating as you ought.

Also, the word “baller” can no longer be in your vocab, but then it probably never was.

1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh, do I start Q-Aron tomorrow or roll with Tanny Fanny so I can at least pretend Rodgers got the suspension he deserves?

0
Dunstan

Pretend you’re a real NFL owner and play whichever asshole gets you the win.

4
SonOfSpam

With Julio out, I kinda think Q-aron is the right call.

But this year, I have been wrong SO MUCH about both college and pro football, you should probably bet the house on the Titans’ over.

0
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening.

0
Dunstan

Howdy

0
Horatio Cornblower

comment image

Brewed in Enfield, the town of my youth, (I was 3 when we left), and much like Enfield it’s decidedly meh.

2
Brocky

So I was watching full gear, dad comes home and wants to watch 10 rings. So I’m triple screening right now

comment image

2
Don T

Omg breakin’!
comment image

2
Horatio Cornblower

Wait until you hear about this new movie, ‘The Blair Witch Project’!

4
Dunstan

I saw that film in Jerome Bettis’ hometown of Detroit, with Ryan Fitzpatrick, who told me that when he was at Harvard the basketball team could have used a player like Jimmy Graham.

3
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Guess he couldn’t take no for an answer from COVID either

4
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I mean you have to admit it’s a little funny that for the first time now a Delta is inside Ben against <i>his</i> will.” – sorority sister

3
SonOfSpam

Great hustle.

/slaps a Tri-Delt on the ass, hard

2
Mr. Ayo

Live update. Grub sucks. 0-1 ice hox

0
King Hippo

please tell me y’all call yourselves the Ice Twalves

0
Dunstan

Well, Ice Vikings would be sort of redundant…

0
Mr. Ayo

I did just see a number 12 jersey with fan on the nameplate. Sigh.

0
Mr. Ayo

Still sucking. 0-2

0
Mr. Ayo

The suckage has intensified. 0-3 and a natural hat trick.

1
Mr. Ayo

To drive the point home. Dude’s name is Pitlick and these were the first 3 goals of his season.

0
Mr. Ayo

Pity power play goal. 1-3 ice hox.

0
Mr. Ayo

Empty netter with 5 (FIVE) minutes left. Not just the players that suck. 1-4.

0
Mr. Ayo

Another pity goal. 2-4 ice hox.

0
Mr. Ayo

And home clutching freezer vodka closely. Don’t have to endure this abuse again until Wednesday.

0
King Hippo

Have I mentioned before how very much I hate being an NC State supporter?

0
Horatio Cornblower

It’s come up, yes.

0
King Hippo

well, it’s still very much true

1
King Hippo

Chip Kelly get the sack if he loses at home to JV Donks?

0
SonOfSpam

They owe him a buyout if they let him go before mid-January.

I am fine waiting for late January, but no more than that.

0
Brocky

I’m bored, so here’s this:
comment image

3
LemonJello

This Carmen Sandiego reboot has my attention

2
Fronkenshteen

This picture makes me want to have sex, but it also makes me want pancakes.

2
ballsofsteelandfury

You should be bored more often.

0
Don T

I ser Jesus came back to finish the water to wine business.

2
LemonJello

Ole Miss doing everything they can to give this game to the Aggies

0
SonOfSpam

Ole Miss owned the 1st half like Siegfried owned Roy, but they shoulda scored more than 15. Now Jimbo’s Jeniuses have cut it to 5 and old Mo has left Kiffin’s sideline.

1
scotchnaut

Sens up 4-0 on the Pens because you just won’t stop touching yourselves!

1
King Hippo

WCS would be upset, but he’s banging a princess.

2
SonOfSpam

One does not BANG a princess.

One gently PLOWS a princess.

Learn some manners, heathen.

8
SonOfSpam

in the case of British princesses the plowing is often done into a tunnel wall

7
Gumbygirl

+1 Dodi Fayed.

1
King Hippo

That name again is Mister Plow! – WCS, Pittsburgh, PA

3
Gumbygirl

Sir Plowsalot of Pittsburgh.

3
ballsofsteelandfury

comment image&ct=g

1
King Hippo

we need to buy him that jacket as a wedding gift from his imaginary friends

3
ballsofsteelandfury

Does anyone have his mailing address?

Mr. Plow Jacket https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07XZCD42L/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_g_1RT325E6WSKQTB1396TZ

0
Horatio Cornblower

I imagine the Luxembourg consulate has it.

2
King Hippo

Kansas 35, Texas 14. In Austin.

1
Redshirt

Texas and Oklahoma: The Future of the SEC

0
LemonJello

“Tell me more about the Texas 14”
-M. Gaetz

0
King Hippo

It’s 21 now, so afraid the Representative would no longer be interested.

2
Redshirt

That’s a twist: this time it’s Roethlisberger that gets violated by something entering his body without permission.

6
Dunstan

Serious question: if you had to bet your life on it, who would do better on an IQ test, Roethlisberger, or Bradshaw?

1
King Hippo

I can’t bet on Inanimate Carbon Rod?

3
ballsofsteelandfury

Bradshaw. Hands down.

1
Gumbygirl

Bradshaw has been living with his CTE for 40 years. Apples and oranges. Head to head at the same age, I’d go Bradshaw all day.

1
litre_cola

Top O the evenin to ya! I have had the booze shakes all day. I may have over done it yesterday in Edmonton.

4
King Hippo

you know the best cure for that!

1
litre_cola

Sleep. Lots of it. Unfortunately the time change has fucked up my son and so he gets up every god damned day at 4 am.

0
LemonJello

Lane Kiffin: smug asshole or smuggest asshole?

1
Horatio Cornblower

https://twitter.com/NoEscalators/status/1459641408449622018

UConn high-fiving each other during the opening kick return against Clemson.

I’m assuming that the game ended right there and nothing else happened.

1
King Hippo

I mean…y’all covered!

0
LemonJello

You know Dabo is pissed they didn’t get the clean sheet.

Last edited 4 years ago by LemonJello
0
Horatio Cornblower

MORAL VICTORIES ARE THE BEST VICTORIES!!!

0
Brocky

Reminds me of one of my jv games:

Out team fumbled on the two yard line on our first play from scrimmage,

We then scored 49 unanswered points.

That’s what happens when a 5A school schedules a tune up game against a 3a school

0
Gumbygirl

Woohoo, gonna lose to the Lions!

1
montythisseemsstrangetome

Let’s not go overboard here.

2
Horatio Cornblower

Mason Rudolph is the starting QB, so my decision to take Najee Harris with my second pick is going to look like genius, at least until Harris dies from dehydration sometime in the 2nd quarter.

1
Brocky

I just checked to see how much the lions defense was projected.

They’re literally ranked 32nd in defense right now

0
Horatio Cornblower

Seems high

2
ballsofsteelandfury

🤦‍♂️

2
Horatio Cornblower

I probably could have scrolled down a mere inch before posting this, but apparently that was too much effort for me.

4
LemonJello

A real Blair Witch moment.

4
Horatio Cornblower

Me, scrolling down and seeing Fronk and Monty have already covered this:
comment image

4
Fronkenshteen

The Ben: OUT (COVID)

You just know he’s going to turn out to be unvaccinated.

4
King Hippo

of course, Jeebus is his vaccine

1
LemonJello

“Don’t bring me into this.”
-J.H. Christ

3
Dunstan

Ben hates vaccine mandates. He has very strong feelings about anyone having anything inserted into them against their will.

10
Redshirt

Nice.

0
LemonJello

Are we sure it’s not a herpes flare up?

3
King Hippo

HARF! The Ben has The #NuAIDS, more Choco Tacos and Call of Duty this weekend!!

2
montythisseemsstrangetome

HARF HARF COVID

0
LemonJello

Did TamU leave their defense back on campus?

0
Dunstan

Bought a couple of new additions to the bar. Something called Genepy le Chamois, which is sort of a poor man’s Chartreuse, and a Gentian amaro.

The latter is used in a cocktail called “Pink & Smoky.” But since it is pink, smoky, and bitter, I see no reason not to call it the “Rizzo.”

There are worse things I could drink….

3
LemonJello

Jim Tomsula and Ryan Leaf nod in agreement from the overpass they’re living under.

1
montythisseemsstrangetome

Ryan Leaf does radio for Westwood One now. Who knew?

0
King Hippo

that “My Pillow” asshole ran an infomercial during State/Wake. He had a cross on his lapel so u noe u can trust him!

0
LemonJello

Was it a burning cross?

3
montythisseemsstrangetome

I had a trick-or-treater this year give me her husband’s (yes, this was a grown-ass woman) business card for house painting which she described as “faith-based painting”.

2
Gumbygirl

Means you gotta pray the guy shows up, reasonably sober.

4
Don T

Think she grew up in a home with lead-based painting
comment image&ct=g

0
Mr. Ayo

Seems like something I’d keep to myself.

https://twitter.com/FAU_Owls_Nest/status/1459676912775794697

3
montythisseemsstrangetome

Yeah, do the Twitter TOS require disclosure or something?

1
Horatio Cornblower

UConn Football: “Challenge accepted!”

2
Dunstan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjPau5QYtYs

2
King Hippo

LOVE the Drake!!!

0
King Hippo

Hippo is jittier than Michael J. Fox signing a check right now.

2
montythisseemsstrangetome

Jack Buck once joked that he and Muhammad Ali went to shake hands and it took people 20 minutes to separate them.

7
King Hippo

Johnny Reb be all liek Bonfire Cult, HAYELL!!!

0
King Hippo

ooof, that start won’t help Jimmy Lake’s job status any

0
King Hippo

dat “No Manager Bump” is a real thing, yo. See also, Up!!, Guns

0
Mr. Ayo

There has to be 3 secs on the clock to spike the football? What? Why? When?

0
scotchnaut

“Certain hockey game scores might just sneak their way onto this comment thread.”

-Me, for sure

1
blaxabbath

3-2?

0
scotchnaut

“Seriously? 4-1 all the way!”

-Hippo

0
Mr. Ayo

I’ll provide the live updates for the Kraken.

(It will not be good for the home team)

1
Dunstan

If we’re talking hockey, I want to vent about how the Mike Babcock Rehabilitation Tour is underway. David Singh at Sportsnet published a puff piece this week that was such fluffery, Peter King would blush.

0
118
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x