Your Sunday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Do we have more action? Of course we do and this one certainly has the potential to feature quite a number of points.

To The Game!

Chiefs/Raiders:

-PFF’s fourth ranked deep passer through weeks 1-8 was none other than Mr. Carr. Do you not think that old-ish speedster DeSean might go long once or twice? Well, that’s kinda the only thing he does these days. By the way, he hasn’t had more than 15 catches in a season since 2018.

 

-Hunter Renfrow, that boring dude that you never paid much attention to has quietly been a very solid floor guy this year. With only one exception he’s had double digit fantasy points in every game.

-For a team that has won three of its last four games, the Chiefs sure are getting quite a bit of grief from all corners of the football world. I guess we got spoiled for a while there.

-All this camo shit on the sidelines is distracting-give me a pink ribbon any day over this crap.

-As for the Chiefs woes, I read that with teams taking away the deep ball, now Tyreek is in the middle of the field where Kelce does all of his damage. A bit of congestion there that I’m sure Andy will figure out. As for Mecole Hardman, he seems like a lost cause at this point, doesn’t he?

-No matter the winner, with all teams in the AFC West bunched at five wins, no result will unstuck this logjam. May as well cheer for a tie, right?

Type those things that you like to type.

 

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Doktor Zymm

DJAX clearly confused by being outside of the NFC East, where occasional competence

Last edited 3 years ago by Doktor Zymm
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

DeSean Jackson putting the ball on the ground like someone told him it was kosher.

hippofant

Wait, but doesn’t Desean think he’s the REAL Jew? Or is he just a traditional antisemite?

hippofant

I swear to god, Desean was about to run the wrong way up the field until the Chiefs defender stopped him.

Horatio Cornblower

I wanted them to back off and see how far he went.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s My Raiders!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m a fan of Biden’s Build Back Better initiative, but I’m an even bigger fan of Musburger’s Bite Back Better plan.

NotShogunButShogun

Wasn’t that Marv?

litre_cola

We know AB just like to finish on his bible study partners back.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Probably, but we’re in a post-facts era.

Gumbygirl

Was he a biter like Marv Albert? It’s hard to keep the pervs straight!

Gumbygirl

Scuzzlebutt’s leg!

Gumbygirl

.

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hippofant

What kind of fucking playcalling genius runs an end-around from like the 3-fucking-yard line when every defender is literally within 5 yards of the line of scrimmage because they literally can’t be any further back, fucking Christ.

hippofant

This is the fucking shit Eagles fans got tired of years ago that we all forgot since Reid moved to the Chiefs, but it’s all fucking coming back to him now.

Horatio Cornblower

Yes, only Andy Reid has thought of having the TE fake a block and then slip out for a reception at the goal line, Cris. You unmitigated fuckwit.

Doktor Zymm

Every time Las Vegas scores fewer points than 55, they are underperforming in Roman Numerals

Horatio Cornblower

Banner

Doktor Zymm

What are things coming to when you can’t trust a guy with neck tatts to stop at the whistle?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Raiders are making it really, <i>really</i> easy for the refs to fix this game for the Chiefs, if that’s what the NFL has directed them to do.

TheRevanchist

That’s My Chiefs!

Doktor Zymm

What is St Jones the saint of? I suck at being catholic

Game Time Decision

The Saint of keeping up?

Don T

The shakes and button flies

Gumbygirl

Being dreamy!

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Horatio Cornblower

This is such a pretty beer when poured in the glass I almost don’t want to drink it.
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Almost

Last edited 3 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Doktor Zymm

I feel like I would be really disappointed when that doesn’t taste like foamed milk

Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, I had to replace the other photo. This one shows the color and opaqueness well, but as for that head…
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Doktor Zymm

When I was a kid, speed skating was a sport I thought I had a shot at, despite the fact that I did not speed skate, but just figure skated really fast

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What is the proper burnt offering I should make to Shan’khlor for the favor she bestowed upon my Raiders?

Horatio Cornblower

“Ends”
-A. Reid

Doktor Zymm

I feel like a mild hallucinagen that distorts time and distances would be appropriate

Gumbygirl

A nice mellow indica?

LemonJello

Another offering for SHAN’KHLOR

Doktor Zymm

There is no world where Kelce is pronounced correctly. It should either be Kelss, or Kelche

Fronkenshteen

Kelce just got his ribs broken.

litre_cola

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Doktor Zymm

How did the Chiefs manage to win most of the games from 1990 – 2015? Didn’t they suck hairy, scabby balls most of that time?

herodotus450

Elvis Grbac was an inside jorb!

Gumbygirl

Elvis!

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Doktor Zymm

I used to know a fat Elvis who was about 10 years younger than me and enjoyed drinking 40s. I wonder how he’s doing?

Gumbygirl

Ugh, not bloated Elvis. This one!

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Not really, no. 95, 97, and 03 they were 13-3, and most other years were pretty Fisheresque.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

2007 to 2012 was their only really bad stretch.

Doktor Zymm

I guess that’s my main point of reference, and the few Chiefs fans I know are just super overdramatic

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’d love to talk shit about how awful Chiefs fans are, but my pot and kettle are both staring at me with their hands on their hips.

Doktor Zymm

No teams have good fans, with all the exceptions being present on this site

Doktor Zymm

LOL dead bug Chiffs fat guy

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Man, d’BLAPPT really phoned it in on that one.

yeah right

I just now got home. I live about 14 miles from the stadium.

Factor accordingly.

Doktor Zymm

Leave early or not at all!

yeah right

Final recommendation. Get there 2 hours early and be prepared to stay at LEAST 2 hours after. Stadium was magnificent, the traffic coordination is an unmitigated fucking disaster.

Doktor Zymm

Is there a helipad? Could we pay an obscene amount of money to be evacuated with Snoop Dogg or whatever other celebs happen to be there?

Doktor Zymm

Oh neat! The winery accidentally gave me a more expensive Cab Franc that wasn’t in my tasting instead of the 50/50 Petit Syrah/Zinf blend

hippofant

The Raiders lineman is trying to remove scissors (?) off the field, and the Chiefs guard just doesn’t care, tries to get him called for offsides anyways! That’s good hustle!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[pats his pockets furiously, worried about his stabbin’ scissors] – Raiders fan

Doktor Zymm

Stabbing shears for the right hand, pinking shears for the left

LemonJello

Different story if that was Michael Irvin

litre_cola

There goes my side hustle. I reckon I can keep my job because I heavy pour customers and AM WITTY AS FUCK.

https://www.bbc.com/news/business-59246183

Doktor Zymm

Seems like something that would be great at festivals where it’s all about throughput, or shitty corporate bars that probably already installed taps at the tables, but won’t catch on anywhere else

ballsofsteelandfury

I’d say sporting events too. That’s a lot of volume.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Woo hoo! Still having fun!

litre_cola

Jamie Foxx’s daughter is hot, and she was born the year I graduated high school, that’s good, didn’t want to be a Sanchez or Chmura.

Game Time Decision

It’s every 3rd commercial, FUCK YOU CANCON

Doktor Zymm

Okay, downloaded Timberborn on y’all’s recommendation. I think I’m gonna call my first settlement Janet, as in Dammit, Janet

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Of course the week I don’t need anything out of Tyreek Hill in fantasy is the week he’ll put up like 30 points.

LemonJello

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litre_cola

There is my Hill td. Jacobs next please.

Doktor Zymm

So, all these years, do you think that Rodgers actually thought that moustaches prevent prostate cancer?

Game Time Decision

Yes but only if Joe Rogan told him it was true

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Well he certainly didn’t believe moustache <i>rides</i> prevented it.” – Olivia Munn

Game Time Decision

It’s started. It’s snowing here. Booooo

litre_cola

Before us! Before us!

/we are getting snow tonight.

Game Time Decision

Gotta get teh snow tires on still. Gah

Doktor Zymm

Back home, bathrobe donned, pizza in the toaster oven, least fancy wine chilling for consumption with the aforementioned pizza. Caught the radio pre-game show, which I enjoyed.

LemonJello

False start on 4th & inches? That’s Rikki’s Raiders!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, Leatherwood is a penalty factory.

NotShogunButShogun

A Bleergh Bishop?

King Hippo

oh, this is gonna be made canon

Game Time Decision

How did we miss this?

King Hippo

BLEERGH only knows

NotShogunButShogun

Wtf was that supposed to be?

Mr. Ayo

Ahh, prom night is never far from the mind, is it.

LemonJello

The shame never goes away.

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Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
King Hippo

What made Colt McCoy leave the game? He hurt his titty.

yeah right

Getting out of here is every bit the fucking shitshow that getting in was. We’re parked on Century just south of the stadium and going nowhere. There’s going to be series mention of don’t bother.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

LOOK AT THAT LEFT-HANDED CHECKDOWN!

LemonJello

Who knew Mahomes was amphibious?

SonOfSpam

It’s “analgesic” dumbass

litre_cola

Isn’t it anesthetic? Cuz I am sleepy.

Mr. Ayo

The balls signal has been activated.

ballsofsteelandfury

Of course, it’s analicious!

Mr. Ayo

If it croaks like a toad, and looks like a toad, it’s amphibious.

King Hippo

Charles Shackleford has entered the chat

King Hippo

Kudos to Schotchy for another most excellent day of previews. The games TOTES have not deserved Scotchy’s acumen, so DUE BETTER SNF

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

All right, I promised myself I’d only keep watching this game as long as it’s fun. So don’t be surprised if I disappear in the next fifteen minutes.

Redshirt

I’m currently watching Spider-Man 2, reminding myself that I’m the few that didn’t like the movie. It has its moments, but I just can’t get past some story issues and I still don’t think Tobey Maguire was a good actor as Spider-Man.

But compared to the next one, this one was is The Godfather.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The Chiefs have a guy named Pringle returning kicks? The Raiders need to get Kolton Miller onto special teams, stat!

LemonJello

Cannibalism may not be a penalty, but it is frowned upon on a national broadcast.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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WCS

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King Hippo

the Carl Weathers storyline was so, so great

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Are there any Carl Weathers storylines that aren’t great?

King Hippo

not that I can ‘member

rockingdog

Found a funny;

they should put shopping carts in the middle of grocery stores for us idiots who think we can carry our groceries but end up getting too much shit and constantly dropping it all over the store

WCS

Hola. Princess fiancée understands ties, unlike McNabb.

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King Hippo

OF COURSE she does, make sure she knows we prefer the proper nomenclature DRAW and she will be impressed with your imaginary friends.

Mr. Ayo

The Princess fancies bondage? My word!

Horatio Cornblower

Those Hapsburgs have seen some shit.

LemonJello

Al is itching to hit the casinos as soon as this game is over.

NotShogunButShogun

Reid too. Those poor buffets.

Game Time Decision

What’s wrong with his left eye? Or has it always been like that and I never noticed?

Spur

Raiders had a great week, only 1 team related death this week.

WCS

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

How would we know the NFL is pro military industrial complex (and bilking DOD/taxpayer dollars) if they weren’t all festooned in camo in November?

NotShogunButShogun

I thought they were just really big into hunting! Up nort it’s common apparel this time o the year.

litre_cola

We need a confetti, pink, camo mash up. It would be fabuloUs!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m just glad the U.S. is not like those European countries that spend next to nothing on the military and use that money for free healthcare and paid family leave and stuff like that.

litre_cola

KC, -2.5, Over 52.5, Hill TD, Jacobs TD 8 to 1. Let’s go as everything went to trash in the 4th quarter in the afternoon games.

Fronkenshteen

My late night garbage:

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Fronkenshteen

Part deux:

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rockingdog

LOL what the what?

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Redshirt

Ah, great! Now I want to nail Ronald Reagan!

NotShogunButShogun

Fucken Reagan amirite?

King Hippo

say what you will about his policies, but that man FUCKED.

ballsofsteelandfury

And allegedly his wife sucked a dick like no other.

King Hippo

ah mean, face like that she pretty much had to smgdh