Sexy Friday New Year’s Eve 2021 Edition

It is the last day of 2021! We made it!

As this post publishes, the New Year is beginning in The Azores, so Feliz Ano Novo!

That can also be translated in Spanish as Happy New Anus so I feel that’s perfectly appropriate.

Our European pals are already in the new year so they can let us know how it’s going. Anything cool happen yet? I’m thinking yes but people complain that I’m too optimistic.

I wish you all the very best this year!

As far as the music, we are back to the puzzles! No one got it last week, so I’m replaying it for the last time. Let’s see if you can figure it out.

Today’s pictures are once again courtesy of you perverts. Thank you very much for your contributions!

***

Balls’ New Year Resolutions!

Instead of a stand-alone post, I figured I would include my goals for this New Year here in this space. As in previous years, I encourage everyone else to join in the fun and write down their goals in the comments if you didn’t already in Sharky’s post. They say that writing down your goals helps you A LOT in achieving them, so let’s get to it!

Goal Número Uno – Fitness

Last year, I achieved my goal of getting below 20% body fat and keeping it there. My goal this year is to get jacked like Stewart in Letterkenny

I figure the goal will be getting below 15% body fat and increasing the size of my biceps, thighs, and other muscles.

Goal Número Dos – Literature

Last year, I started reading the Fractured Europe series of books by Dave Hutchinson. I finished the first two (Europe in Autumn and Europe At Midnight) and I have in my possession the third book, Europe in Winter. I want to finish that one and then finish the series with Europe At Dawn.

I also have a book written by former KROQ deejay Richard Blade. Last year, I read his autobiography, The World In My Eyes, which was VERY good. He also writes fiction and I bought his novel, Birthright. Depending on how I like it, I may buy/read more of his books.

So, the goal is to read 5 new books in 2022.

Goal Número Tres – Writing

I really enjoyed writing the Goddess series and other posts with TWBS. He was a great writing partner and provided a lot of inspiration for writing fiction. As you can tell, my posts don’t really go much into creating characters and stories. I did a little of that with the TWBS Dante series that Senor Weaselo so graciously took over after the Inferno portion, but I would like to delve into that world more.

I think it will push me to be a better writer and that’s the purpose of resolutions, isn’t it? To push yourself into areas where you feel uncomfortable and improve yourself?

So, the goal is to write a multi-post series along those lines. I’m not sure yet how it will work, but it will be interesting.

Goal Número Cuatro – Leisure

I have not had a real vacation in a very long time. COVID hasn’t helped, either. I don’t know what the future holds or what the COVID situation will be by this time next year, so I’m not going to say I’m going to travel internationally or something like that, which I’ve done in the past. Instead, I think I will go for the full week off work with the phone being off.

Trust me, that’s going to be EXTREMELY difficult to pull off.

However, I need to. I don’t have long, hopefully, until retirement but I also do not want to burn myself out. To paraphrase Depeche Mode, you’ve got to Get The Balance Right.

Goal Número Cinco – Giving Back

I know that I am extremely lucky to have the life and lifestyle that I have. Not many people do and most of the time, it’s not their fault. As I get older, I realize more and more how life is not in your control and how, if one or two things were to happen differently, your life would change drastically.

So, this year, I want to devote a lot of time and energy to helping others. I’m not quite sure how that’s going to play out. I may mentor some staff at work and help them to improve themselves and their skills. I may volunteer my time doing beach cleanups or some things like that. I may run 10K or 5K runs for charity. I’m not sure exactly what I’ll do, but I do know I want and NEED to do something.

So, the goal is to do one act of giving back each month. More if I am able to.

***

For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.

Here are your 12 pictures of the week.

h/t Mr. Ayo (Balls’ Pic O’ Da week!)
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t Mr. Ayo
h/t 2Pack
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur

***

YOU’RE-A-PRUDE

***

And now, for the music!

As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

This week, I present to you what I think is the toughest puzzle yet. The first clue was Video. The second clue was Release. The third and final clue is: Title. I’m hoping you’re able to get it from there. Enjoy!

Song Number One:

The Cure – Killing an Arab

Canción Número Dos:

David Bowie – Let’s Dance

Chanson Numéro Trois:

Talking Heads – Girlfriend is Better

Canzone numero quattro:

Depeche Mode – Strangelove

Canção número cinco

Prince – Sign O’ The Times

Seigarren zenbakia:

Gorillaz – Demon Days

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and fly low and avoid the radar.

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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The Maestro

Happy New Year, assholes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

HAPPY EAST COAST NEW YEAR!

Brocky

One behalf of all of dfoers on the east coast

Meh

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Andy Cohen is hammered and this still isn’t compelling tv

Senor Weaselo

My resolution? Cut down on the backlog. And maybe find a way to watch BattleBots this year.

Mr. Ayo

Starts next week! Can’t wait!

Brick Meathook

Late NYE lunch today:

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I miss sugarfish

Beerguyrob

Pre-Happy New Year from the west coast of Canada. Riga is disappointed in my life choices this year. Hopefully I can make her happier in 2022.

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Mr. Ayo

No fair. It’s not 12am eastern yet.

I was just about to post this.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I wasn’t wrong.

yeah right

Next Balls explains the Bible.

WCS

Princess has us watching Dick Clark’s corpse New Year’s thing, and what’s left of Journey is playing in Times Square.

This is far superior:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJHwmieQMvY&ab_channel=D.Hulbert

Don T

Happy New Year from Atlantic time!
/drinks, projectile spitting
WHO PUT WATER IN MY GLA—oh. Darling! Heh. I was just overcome with emotion gazing at your beauty.

Redshirt

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Mr. Ayo

UGA is a 2.5 point favorite in the championship game.

Is that right?

Horatio Cornblower

I would likely bet Bama hard for that, so yes, it’s probably right.

Gumbygirl

“Connor Clapton, you come back here right this minute!”

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Mr. Ayo

Holy shit!

Sharkbait

Holy fuck. Amazing

Don T

I love it when you stare at me like that 😘

Redshirt

That better be oranges the coaches get showered with. Not orange juice, oranges.

Sharkbait

Love me some David Bowie. Let’s dance is a great one.

Redshirt

..

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Redshirt

Ejecting a backup for Targeting? Oh, come on! Give him some patience; he hardly ever plays.

Horatio Cornblower

Michigan fans right now:
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Redshirt

The Great New Year’s Eve Comeback begins!

Redshirt

How many times have they cut to Harbaugh in the 2nd Half?

Mr. Ayo

This game is still on?

Start the running clock!

WCS

Has anyone else notice that every semi-final playoff game has sucked? Like, all of them:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_College_Football_Playoff_games

I blame the evil Gavin McCleod.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Bm9GPx5FMA&ab_channel=JohnSmith

herodotus450

The only solution is to expand so there are 8 more playoff games.

Redshirt

2014 Ohio State-Alabama was pretty good. Also, 2017 Georgia-Oklahoma.

SonOfSpam

Can not believe all 3 missed the Final Jeopardy question.

Gumbygirl

Did Amy win?

WCS

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Gumbygirl

Oh my God, I remember her! Her husband was awful too.

Last edited 2 years ago by Gumbygirl
BrettFavresColonoscopy
Last edited 2 years ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
SonOfSpam

Easily.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Songs to dance to

BrettFavresColonoscopy

If that’s not it, then it’s clearly songs with notes in them

Mr. Ayo

Songs that stumped DFO

WCS

Songs that don’t feature Stevie Ray Vaughn, Stevie Nicks, or Stevie Wonder.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Songs that Stevie Wonder can’t see?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s my favorite conspiracy theory

Gumbygirl

I’m pretty sure Stevie Wonder is really most sincerely blind, because I remember how he was dressed in the 70’s/80’s. It’s better now, but holy shit. There’s no way he would have chosen that stuff if he could see it! And the cheap plastic beads they used to put in his braids, oh Lordy!

Gumbygirl

.

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Gumbygirl

Stevie Ray can’t see them either.

Sharkbait

The puzzle is “Artists who have never been in my kitchen”

Horatio Cornblower

Lucky. I can’t get Depeche Mode out of mine.

Mr. Ayo

I’m still infested with Ratts.

Gumbygirl

That’s Herb Fucking Alpert!

Don T

Women and their mesmerizing charms

TheRevanchist

Even though Michigan shit the bed, at least it’s not Ohio State.

herodotus450

Well surely Michigan is doing better than Cincinnatti I’ll just check the scorecomment image

Last edited 2 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
yeah right

The inside of every window in my dojo is just dripping condensation.

And now I’m a little worried that my apartment is going to fuck me.

It was the bread!

The goddamn bread!!

Gumbygirl

Moxie!

SonOfSpam

/writes “game over” in notebook
//sprinkles nutmeg into Allagash White
///sniffs own farts, becomes erect

Mr. Ayo

Most of us did that before the game started.

(The last part, of course)

Horatio Cornblower

Announcers talking about the speedy Michigan return man, while I’m watching half of Georgia’s return defense team catch up to him like he was running in mud.

I think I can see where this game is going.

rockingdog

Last funny;

Every year on NYE I think “no way they can turn this number into glasses” and every year I am wrong

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’ve started doing this thing where when I make a Manhattan, I put an extra luxardo in so lady BFC can also have one when I finish my drink. Im not saying I’m a hero, but I’m also not not saying it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’ll say it.
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SonOfSpam

There may be better men, but they won’t be getting special “thank you” action like you will.

(special “thank you” action is when she says “thank you” without making eye contact)

Horatio Cornblower

Me: “Honey, have this cherry that’s been soaking in my drink for the last 20, (3), minutes.”

Mrs. Cornblower: (exhaling HUGE cloud of marijuana) “I don’t drink and I hate fruit. What the fuck is the matter with you?”

Mr. Ayo

Ungrateful wench.

(Don’t tell her I said that)

Gumbygirl

Not a bourbon drinker, (lightweight) but I love a cherry soaked in it. I say hero, not zero. Stud, not dud. Champ, not chump.

litre_cola

Well he is your favoUrite but don’t tell anyone.

Gumbygirl

He is!

Mr. Ayo

Time to chug freezer vodka and see if I can pass out before this stupid game concludes.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

By “game” I presume you meant “year”.

Redshirt

.

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Horatio Cornblower

RIP Alan Rickman.

I think that was this year, but between being on the losing side of 50 and (gestures vaguely at 2021 calendar), all of this shit, I have long since lost any sense of time.

yeah right

I can confirm his dead state.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I hope everyone here’s 2022 is better than their 2021, even if their 2021 was still pretty good.

King Hippo

Whose 2021 was good? Morticians??

litre_cola

Canada Futbol!

SonOfSpam

Like her?
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litre_cola

I found/find her attractive.

SonOfSpam

As you ought.

SonOfSpam

Same to you. We’re all still here, so 2021 was at least okay.

Brick Meathook

I bought this mug at the Rose Parade Float Display in Pasadena the day after Jameis Winston’s shitshow performance in The Rose Bowl Presented By Capital One.

Little did I know . . .

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SonOfSpam

So I guess Georgia and Bama are just bigger and faster than everyone else?

Ok then. Despite this evening’s game, still think Bama wins.

What’s the spread? Bama by 6 or 7?

Horatio Cornblower

I’d bet on Bama for any line under 9.5. Saban has that team ready and Georgia doesn’t think they can beat them.

It should be noted that I do not bet on sports, because I am awful at it.

SonOfSpam

Likewise. I mentioned on an earlier thread that I liked Michigan and the points, so I really hope someone took advantage and bet a mortgage on Georgia.

litre_cola

I have a 50 CAD parlay with Bama -13.5 and Georgia – 7.5 thank you!

Horatio Cornblower

What’s that work out to in Loonies?

litre_cola

I believe it converts to a stake of 4 Chinese knock off futbol jerseys.

Horatio Cornblower

Solid investing!

herodotus450

Only other tiny thing I can think of is that the SEC had a mostly normal, full season last year, able to develop players a lot better than most of the other conferences.

King Hippo

tOSU is the only school that recruits in the same stratosphere, and they just had an off (for them) year.

herodotus450

If they had any kind of QB experience at the beginning of the year they probably beat Oregon, and set up an hilarious situation where they moonwalk into the playoffs over Cinci with one loss

King Hippo

It will be 4-6.5, I’d estimate

SonOfSpam

I’d happily lay (phrasing!) anything less than a TD.

(i.e., bet Georgia heavily)

Horatio Cornblower

Bama all day with a line like that.

I might even wander down to that facility owned by some of our aboriginal brethren just south of my house and put a small sum of money on that.

Horatio Cornblower
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Agreed, not having escalators is akin to a war crime.” – Coach Reid, gazing longingly at a second-floor barbecue joint

scotchnaut

Michigan getting both their Upper and Lower peninsulas pushed in so hard-gonna have to start calling them The Inlets.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This would be a banner if any of us understood terms like isthmus

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[frowns] – Mike Mayock

Horatio Cornblower

[drowns]-Mike Mayock

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Listen, you can talk all the shit you want about 2021, but no year that saw the death of Rush Limbaugh can be considered all bad.

Horatio Cornblower

I am not kidding at all when I say this: the day he died I took a half day off from work because I was laughing too hard to focus.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I feel compelled to say “I just wish he had suffered more” but that would be true even if he had literally been tortured to death by genital electrocution over the course of six months.

SonOfSpam

AND YET

There are a whole bunch of Trumps and Trump-adjacent people that I will wish worse upon.

Horatio Cornblower

End stage cancer is a bitch, but I’m sure that son of a bitch was more doped up than Hippo after a Broncos loss and never felt more than a twinge.

Which is the sort of tragedy even Shakespeare would regret.

Mr. Ayo

UM Offense: We have hope!

UGA Defense: Best save that hope for a merciful death.

King Hippo

Harbs the Lesser is relieved to avoid the clean sheet.

Mr. Ayo

His year end review is going to include the awkward line item that he scored on the Dawgs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yeah! Fuck them clean sheets!” – Najeh Davenport

King Hippo

You ever have a dream where you’re taking a shit, then wake up in terror to check…no, me neither. WEIRDO

JimU

Happy New Year! Can we skip right to 2023?

litre_cola

Not if Canada qualifies for the FIFA World Cup brought to you by slavery and dirty oil money!

JimU

They’re going to air condition the desert!

litre_cola

I mean you can’t get a hotel room (I looked all booked by Qataris) but whatevs, let’s play ball!

JimU

It’s hard to be bigger fans than Euro Futbol fans.

WCS

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I thought it was “your highness”.

King Hippo

Sir, you’re making a scene.

WCS

Your Yinzerness

litre_cola

Nah, that’s me.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Horatio Cornblower

THE MISERY OF THE MASSES WILL BE SALVED BY THE BLOOD OF SLAUGHTERED HAPSBURGS FOR GENERA….

Uh, I mean, uh, hey, Happy New Year to you, too, WCS.

litre_cola

Plans? No. There is a winter storm warning and it is fucking cold. Kid and pug puppy losing their minds therefore I upped the edible consumption for the evening.

Horatio Cornblower

It’s 40 and rainy here. like it has been for a straight week. This winter is going to be four months of fucking March, and I am going to go mad.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Took a little outdoor brewery visit in the snow, now back and making a Manhattan while dinner is in the oven.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m out of red vermouth. I’m drinking Cuba Librés instead.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I picked up a very cheap, not great bottle of sweet vermouth earlier this week.

I can’t wait to have my bar back.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s irritating to me that despite all the “advances” in voice recognition technology, there’s no way in a million years I could tell any device “let me know if the Michigan-Georgia game is within one score in the fourth quarter” and have it deliver.

From a code perspective, it’s remarkably simple, too.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I had a friend who was a CS major and he laughed about the prospect of the singularity happening within our lifetimes. He was right to laugh.

King Hippo

WE DON’T EVEN HAVE GLORIOUS SEX ROBOTS FOR FUCK’S SAKE (literally)

scotchnaut

They’re not ‘glorious’ for sure-

Me: [just last night] “Misako! Please, please unclench your kegels… Now!”

Misako: “Not just now, master. Just a little bit longer…”

Horatio Cornblower

I can tell you right now that the answer would be “no”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

As I explained at length to a very disinterested Dr. Mrs. Deadly, Esq. (ret), if not for Cincinnati the committee would have been able to shoehorn Notre Dame into the playoffs. If for nothing else, we owe those kids a TREMENDOUS debt of gratitude and let us raise our glasses to their achievement this season.

HUZZAH!

King Hippo

Thank sweet Christ for that small mercy.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s not a “small” mercy. Just think how the committee had to choke down the bile in their throats as they passed over a one-loss Notre Dame team. ONE LOSS! If it had been to anyone other than Cincinnati themselves, the Bearcats would have been, to quote the late great Betty White, “dirt-roaded”.

Redshirt

UC fans are having that attitude: disappointing but hell of a season.

King Hippo

Cincy looks a damned sight better than MI

King Hippo

Having done so before, it’s kind of like getting old – just better than the alternative.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, it’s way better to see them on the outside, pounding on the glass, screaming that *this time* things will go differently.

Horatio Cornblower

Look, I’m not sorry that Notre Dame didn’t get to fulfill their self-proclaimed Divine Right to get into the play-offs every year, but I’m not going to lie that I don’t miss seeing them slaughtered like a bunch of student video assistants on a scissor lift in high winds, either.