The NFC East has certainly turned things around-they have the most wins of any division at this point. I don’t like either of these teams (natch) but it would be silly of me not to watch a matchup of this caliber.
To The Game!
Cowboys/Eagles:
-As you suspected, Dallas’ pass rush leads the league in pressures and is second in sacks. Though Parsons and Lawrence are the stars, nine different players have at least one sack.
-The Philly D is not exactly slouchy though-they have more takeaways than the Cowboys-11 to 7. One of the things they do well is taking wr’s out of the game. They are ranked #1 vs #1 guys (Jefferson was held to 48 yards) and are #2 against the 2’s.
-Philly’s o-line has been amazing at pass-blocking especially but they have four fellas banged up for this game. The one that is healthy, Lane Johnson, is facing off against DeMarcus and he hasn’t allowed a sack since week 11 of 2020.
-Is this the game where Rush has to manufacture more than 24 points? Because he hasn’t been able to/hasn’t had to yet. He’s a cool 5-0 both in his game record and ATS.
-Massive Improvement: Hurts has jumped his completion percentage from last year’s 61.3 (26th) to this year’s 67.9 (5th). Coaches attribute it to him having more patience letting routes develop and not rushing things. Of course there’s a price to be paid for this-he is far and away the qb that has been hit the most, having been touched up 84 times so far.
Enjoy what should be a good one.
There it is. If you can’t beat ’em, beat ’em.
Eh, good game. Rush is clearly not ready for prime time and Dallas had a chance in the 4th quarter. It is what it is, 4-2 with the Lions and Bears before the bye week. Go into that 6-2 and see what happens afterwards.
You think they can beat the Lions and Bears?
I see the Cowboys haven’t learned from the Wild Card game: you don’t put the ball in the center of the field, you hand it to the nearest official! Even if you set it down at the right spot, the referee still needs to pick it up and set it down!
It’s a Mike McCarthy team, Redshirt; they’re not gonna learn from the preceding play.
Nailed It!
— B. Walsh
Not even Pepperidge Farms remembers when the Dallas O-line was an actual asset.
Oh my god, Collinsworth actually predicted something correctly.
Other than banging high school girls
Is he one of those? I don’t think I’d heard that about him.
Please do your research
I guess the Philadelphia Eagles are going to 6-0.
throwup-jimcarrey.gif (160×90) (tenor.com)
SUDDEN DRAMATIC TURNAROUND
Nice to see Dallas establishing the run with 6 minutes left
Mike McCarthy always rises to the middle.
Cris: “Haha, you ever know an NFL wife who didn’t win a battle with her husband?”
Tirico: (Don’t say Nicole Brown Simpson. Don’t say Nicole Brown Simpson)
Tirico: “Janay Rice?”
“Hey what’s Kato Kalen up to these days?!”
– DFO Producers
America’s Houseguest?
Chris Henry: …
That chick wasn’t married to Joe Mixon.
Not that NBC would dare let it be spoken of anyways.
I thought I’d put a lot of work into my car recently, and then I saw Gwen Stefani in that commercial
But maybe Gwen would want you to
That play might work in college but not the NFL
Why are they going for two here?
McCarthy wants to know if he can still call time out
Well, on the plus side Dallas is coming back and making a game of this. On the negative side they remain one of the dumbest and most undisciplined teams I’ve ever seen.
Thank you Mike McCarthy
Is his success with Rogers the result of some kind of like — two wrongs making a right?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iISF66hS44s&ab_channel=PriteshYadav
I just grabbed some leftover pulled pork and ate a charred and heavily seasoned piece of fat and I regret nothing.
This must be how Andy Reid goes through life.
and that’s just his pre-breakfast sleepwalking
Man is a champion.
I deeply regret not going to bed at haftime
Dear Jesus I do not like how this is going.
This game has all the makings of Dallas getting to within 3, or making taking the lead by 4, and then McCarthy going full McCarthy over the last 8 or so minutes and snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
YEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAWWWWWWW THAT’S WHY I BROUGHT ON THE FAT SONBITCH IN THE FIRST PLACE I AM FUCKING CRAAAAAAZZZZZYYYYYYYY.
Or it won’t even need to happen because turnovers
Microsoft Edge was whatever browser Buddy used between the ages of 15 to 19
I don’t get this joke, but since Buddy wrote I’m gonna go ahead and assume it’s filthy.
You would be correct.
I believe it’s related to the practice of “edging”, aka masturbating to the brink of orgasm yet not finishing.
This message brought to you by National Ass Day. Which is today.
That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
And you’re a Cowboys fan, so that’s saying something.
My goodness you’re still here
Could y’all try sucking a little less
Hmmmm, we’d rather not. – Philadephia
– Whoever wasted their time giving first aid to Ashlee Babbitt, speaking to her lungs through the hole in her chest
ah, good point. Regardless of sportsball, we can all just be glad that traitorous bitch is ded.
I find this comment deeply offensive, because the hole was actually in her throat.
Snowflake
These two teams can not possibly hit each other hard enough.
We need triage units and plasma bags because fuck both of them so very very hard.
(hey guys, watch this)
Y’know, Yeah Right, having seen the replay again I really don’t think Drew Pearson pushed off on that Hail Mary.
Oh fuck right off!
This is a very very funny comment.
Layers.
And exhale… for tonight.
Taillon tomorrow. Could go 8 strong, could shit the bed by the 3rd.
I think I’m going to have to move to Hawaii.
Our how do you move to a territory? Is Samoa still ours?
Don T sideye…
Try Guam, I hear good things.
/knows where Guam is and that’s literally it.
They like Spam!
Who doesn’t?
Puerto Rico’s closer. But yeah any of the territories man you’re a dude with money have at it
Puerto Rico is……
a great idea. I’ll definitely check it out.
[Doesn’t get stabbed]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlyaVk8PKwQ
That’s funny.
Mahalo.
Who the fuck are the Guardians?
That heap-crazy new name, pale face
The Team Formerly Known As The Indians Who Didn’t Have The Marketing Sense To Return To The Name ‘Spiders’ Even Though They Had That History And It Was Right There For The Taking.
Spiders would be great. I would also approve of “Engines” but because I’m kind of a dick
Cleveland River Fires has potential. I’d buy a jersey.
Would also buy; but it sounds like a minor league team
I said what I said.
The Cleveland Engines. Gas or Electric?
Steam, of course.
I have been told by actual Clevelanders that Guardians is a very good name they think is good.
Yeah, it has something to do with an Art Deco bridge. I mean, cool and great for local marketing, but nationally Spiders would have been the shit.
I agree. Spiders could have been awesome.
I guess “Commanders” was already taken
Should have gone with Steamers.
Some flyover city team
Apparently they are the Guardians of Traffic. Who knew!
“Taco Bell, when you want the same ‘food’ a drugged out ‘comedian’ orders while coming down from the night before”
am done. going to watch this from bed. Eagles better not blow this…..
Caller on the Cardinals post game show refered to Kyler Murray as “Xbox Jr”
Must have been a double XP weekend for Call of Duty
Stop reading if I’ve told this story before, but years ago I hooked up with a clan of Call of Duty players out of, wait for it, Canada. Naturally, you would not know them.
Anyway, they took a liking to me even though I sucked, because I was good for a laugh and could shit talk rivals better than they could. They were, at best, blue collar. Some of them literally worked what they called “Joe Jobs”, loading boxes for 8 hours because it left them more time to play Xbox.
One double XP weekend I’m teamed up with one of them playing on some random team. We get to talking and it turns out he has shared custody of his son, and his son will be over soon. He says, and this is pretty much verbatim “I mean, I love my son, but why does his weekend have to be a double XP weekend?”
People, I have torn some assholes before and since, but I have never torn an asshole like I did that day.
Me: “I mean, I don’t like bad fathers BUT it is comforting knowing that I won’t need to do so some outstanding parenting job myself for my kid to keep pace.”
Brett Farve: “Like this Chinese/Korea education stuff — how do these sushi heads do it? Seems like a lot of not-fun.”
Thats effin funny
THAT RIZZO AT BAT I CALL IT LATE DECEMBER BACK IN ’63, BECAUSE SOMEONE WAS NOT QUITE READY IN THE BOX!!!
https://twitter.com/FitzyMoPena/status/1581443459973468160
Costas is asking about the Zodiac Killer ?
Thought it was Rafael “Ted” Cruz
It’s never been conclusively disproved that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer, and frankly his silence on the issue is troubling.
If you had told me, a rational Cowboys fan, that something called Cooper Rush was going to start 3 of the first 6 games and Dallas was going to go 4-2 I would have signed for the immediately.
The irrational Cowboy fan in me, of course, was hoping that Cooper would somehow beat Philly 44-0.
Oddly enough 44-0 was the score of the Chicago Bears 1985 season win vs Dallas.
I was in high school. Still remember the SI cover.
Poor Danny White.
I think he married one of the cheerleaders though, although that might be an urban legend.
Danny did not marry a cheerleader, he kissed one on the sideline after a Super Bowl win. A link to a story about it is below. A nice and benign story that seems to end well for everyone. In other words, it’s a fucking unicorn.
https://www.texasmonthly.com/arts-entertainment/the-photo-the-dallas-cowboys-never-wanted-the-public-to-see/
I came
So my trainer, who is also a friend, is both named Jalen and an Eagles fan. He has Jalen Hurts in a couple of leagues, and has the privilege of being able to name his teams “Losing to Jalen Hurts”
It’s so good
Would you say it…hurts so good?
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
A friend of mine just texted me that “the Dallas QB controversy is over”, (as though there was one), so I gather Rush isn’t exactly covering himself with anything other than dirt.
https://twitter.com/minakimes/status/1581818767629164544
Mina Kimes is a national treasure who needs to be protected at all costs.
The best.
When you talked about Rush covering himself with dirt, it reminded me that Rush Limbaugh is still dead and I smiled.
really thought I could get away with rolling the Cowboys D another week without swapping on the waiver, but didnt count on the Cowboys Offense
ok, no injuries tonight would still be a win
No, Mr. Jones. They’re saying “COOOO-per! COOOO-per!”
Cooper Rush boomlet, mildly amusing while it lasted.
The Owl looks like a Litre/Rev Mayhem Derby!
I see Cooper Rush has at last become Cooper Rush.
COOPERCEPTION!
Dallas pwned again
Giants 5-1. Jets 4-2. Competent football in New York? This is a weird and unsettling thing. What’s next? The Flyers with competent goaltending?
Let’s not get crazy here.
Also, HAHA DALLAS LOL SUCKY SUCKY
You in to the Gin now Zymm?
Not yet, still finishing off the box wine, but liquor is nawt a bad call. My heart would be in these taunts more, although this one was still quite good!
Chicago cold is best in super small doses. Snow is great, even extreme cold can be great, but cities kinda make it all gross. It’s not cold yet, but reconciling the fact that I miss cold and snow, but don’t miss it HERE
Global warming cut off Chicago’s nuts
This could be the last Yankees game of the season, so I feel obligated to watch it, but my God Costas makes it hard to do so. He’s awful; everything he says comes coated with a thick coating of smug.
He should have his head cut off with a spoon
And if a Yankees fan is complaining of smug…
You say that as though an Angels fan could be.
We have the MVP at least.
Two of them actually. And your team still sucks out loud.
We suck quietly so as not to disturb anyone.
I think Trout may be washed, too; recurring back injuries are what eventually ended Mattingly’s career.
The Angels did not, in fact, have the MVP.
Settle down drama llama. They’re not losing.
Sorry was watching the sunset for a while what happened in the game?
They say it’s the air pollution that gives Los Angeles its beautiful sunsets.
They’re not wrong
Wichita is just a wonderful coast.
Back from the wedding. Mrs. Cornblower has made another couple legal in the eye of the State and moral in the eyes of…some kind of internet church I guess. Not many dry eyes.
Now I need a beer and some sports ball activities.
Been a great game. Welcome!
I don’t like the sounds of that considering the source.
/flips over to Cowboys
Ah, yes, I see.
Rush’s limitations are showing
Go birds
DFO, we have achieved MAXIMUM CAP’N BLUEBUNNY!!
Kicking a field goal on the two-yard line with 25 seconds left, down four in the Super Bowl?
Should’ve run it