Your Sunday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Did you enjoy the Germanic football this morning? I’m sure the good folks of Munchen had themselves a time. Myself, a grizzled veteran of NFL football-watching, would have liked a more entertaining game. They should have played it in Berlin because reasons.

To The Game!

Chargers/Niners:

-Everybody thought that the Chargers offense was going to another level this year but injuries to Allen and Williams, a poor offensive line and a commitment to the run/unimaginative play-calling have stifled the team’s potential.

-Herbert hasn’t tossed the ball for over 300 yards in four straight games.

-Be prepared to see the Bosa’s mom in one of those silly split jerseys.

-Shanahan wasted no time whatsoever exploring the possibilities of his new toy, CMC. A run, catch and a pass TD later, we found out what could happen.

-Jimmy G is a competent and capable qb but every time I think of him I wonder, “How many porn stars did the guy actually date? Seems like that’s a ‘thing’ for him”.

-Look for a heavier than usual dose of runball from San Fran because the Chargers give up 5.7 ypc, dead last in the league.

-The Niners should get off to an early lead. DVOA in the first quarter of games has their offense 6th and their defense 2nd. The Chargers numbers in the first are 25th and 28th, respectively.

-Though the Niners front line may be down three guys, the team is getting eight other players back from injury.

Enjoy the very last offering of a long day of footy, folks.

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Brick Meathook

I’m in the market for a new toilet, one that I can’t clog so easily. Here’s a detail from American Standard’s offering. The model name?

The CHAMPION

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Col. Duke LaCross

I have that model in my house, and let’s just say, after my weight loss surgery a few years ago and the increased plumbing demands that came with it, this toilet lives up to its name. Get the elongated version.

WCS

Josh McDaniels is so bad he makes Jim Irsay look smrt.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m having trouble wrapping my head around why the season is such a disaster. The Raiders have been right there in every single game they’ve lost save one (Saints). Their offense is basically average in the major categories. Their defense sucks (as it always does), but their turnover ratio is fine (-1 for the entire season) and penalties are…well, not great, but they aren’t leading the league like they usually do. I’m at a loss.

WCS

Death by 1000 McDaniels.

ballsofsteelandfury
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Chargering achieved!

Col. Duke LaCross

Mrs. Bosa looks like she’s got some strong opinions on what REALLY happened on January 6th.

Last edited 1 year ago by Col. Duke LaCross
Col. Duke LaCross

Mighty strong chin.

Mr. Ayo

Nailed It!

— B. Walsh

WCS

And here comes the Chargering.

HAIL SHA’NKLOR

Brocky

So I discovered this picture, I feel like it’s a football metaphor here , but I can’t think of one

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WCS

The Raiders’ head coach hiring process?

TheRevanchist

The furries might be the best ones to ask.

So, basically, you came to right place to get the answer.

ballsofsteelandfury

This is simple. It’s the last Chiefs-Raiders game.

(White one is the ref)

Last edited 1 year ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Col. Duke LaCross

Thank you 49ers for completely annihilating Deebo Samuel’s fantasy trade value. Fucking great.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I should become a UConn frontrunner.

WCS

Wright State pushing Louisville down a flight of stairs the other night was quite enjoyable.

litre_cola

SHUT THE FUCK UP COLLINSWORTH! He really loves his own voice tonight.

TheRevanchist

Just Tonight?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Looks like we have a dickerthon.

So where is balls?

Senor Weaselo

Good birthdaying:

-Chai with Senorita Weaselo at the local place (that she can’t go to because the barista asked her out a while back)
-Killed it at my gig
-Cake and drinks with Senorita Weaselo to cap it off (she got me a palm sugar cake, it’s almost caramelly.)

What’d I miss?

The Maestro

Missed partying with me, brother!

(I have watched every minute of every game today after enjoying dinner and breakfast at my parents’ house last night and this morning.)

Senor Weaselo

Hope you had a fantastic 30th!

Mr. Ayo

Ded Duck

Dunstan

Careful, I may take this as an excuse to talk about my dinner.

Gumbygirl

Talk!

Dunstan

Really just leftovers from the one I was bragging about yesterday — duck breast with a red wine and pomegranate sauce, buttermilk polenta, and sauteed Swiss chard.

I did finish making the duck soup tonight — with onion, celery, carrot, shiitake mushrooms and wild rice — and had a small bowl just to test it.

Still have another large duck breast and two legs to work on over the next couple of nights.

litre_cola

Good day to you all. I survived a weekend of hard partying in Vancouver, no thanks to BeerguyRob who just had to be in Green Bay today.

Beerguyrob

Chargers are sure trying to Charger this game.

WCS

BLOKMORD, disciple of SHAN’KLOR makes an appearance!

The Maestro

Cameron Dicker? Cameron barely even know ‘er!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This hot start by the Chargers is made even better by the fact that EVERYONE on the pregame show picked Santa Clara to win.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m still not used to seeing these non QBs wearing QB numbers. Get off my lawn.

Beerguyrob

I have escaped the stadium. We are currently waiting out the traffic at the Green Bay Distillery. This absolutely HAMMERED twit at the table next to us has asked me what I do for a living four times and I’ve told her a different thing each time – bartender, pipe fitter, ex-ball player, and raconteur. She doesn’t know who won, but the last score she remembers is 28-14 “Cow-bitches”.

Beerguyrob

Follow up – her husband just came in, screaming about walking up & down Oneida for 20 minutes looking for her. He apologized to us for her, and she introduced me as “Ron the barber”, in case you were wondering g if her memory had improved. Then he dragged her out by the scruff of the collar & she yelled about “making it up to him later”. So I know at least one person getting a vomit-scented blumpkin later tonight.

ThePirateSloth

There is nothing like watching drunk ass people after a football game. Don’t get me wrong, I’m one of them. But these types of interactions are just gold.

Beerguyrob

Agreed. There were no fewer than four tumbles down the stairs in our section.

WCS

This best be covered in a BOTG later.

WCS

HAWT PAWKETS

ThePirateSloth

Oh no Michael Bolton, oh no. No sir.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why should I have to change my name, he’s the one who sucks

WCS

No talent ass clown.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

– every person in the world named Josh McDaniels

Doktor Zymm

Looks like a hamstring injury?
“The most delicious of strings” -A. Reid

Game Time Decision

What about us?
-Cheese strings, crying

WCS

The Vikings are going to go 13-4 and lose in Peak Vikings form in the Divisional Round, aren’t they?

Sorry, yeah right.

Doktor Zymm

It’ll be something silly, like losing to the Giants after beating the Cowboys in the wild card

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Porn stars didn’t negatively impact Gronk, so they can’t be bad. thinkaboutit.gif

Doktor Zymm

So many eskimo brothers!

blaxabbath

“Kyler Murray is faster than Colt McCoy so he has that for him…”

Then the caller just trailed off and hung up.

ThePirateSloth

Imma Chargers fan for the next few hours.

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Last edited 1 year ago by ThePirateSloth
blaxabbath

Everyone is.

Unless you want to be banished to an otherworldly hell all your own.

Last edited 1 year ago by blaxabbath
Redshirt

I live in Ohio. How can I be banished to a place, I’m already at.

Gumbygirl

Could be worse. Haiti, for example.

WCS

Talk about being cursed.

ThePirateSloth

BOOOO stupid image link

Last edited 1 year ago by ThePirateSloth
blaxabbath

Took exactly THE VERY FIRST CALLER on the Cardinals Talk Post-Game Radio Show Presented by San Tan Ford in Gilbert to announce that Kyler Murray should be replaced with Colt McCoy.

I have no intention of ever watching long form NFL again and will follow Red Zone the one week a season they make it available for free. If I ever find myself with having more time on NFL Sundays, I will spend it searching out other post-game call in shows across the nation.

WCS

I don’t know if you’re extraordinarily brave or incredibly masochistic.

blaxabbath

My brother, this is a manicured comment section.

The degenerates who could never face the neutral-oppressive environment of [DFO] flourish here in a way that can only be described as art.

This is reality-tv radio.

Doktor Zymm

Kindle is plugged in. Before they force-updated with all that bloatware I never could have used 70% of the battery in a day, and that was with it in airplane mode and only maybe 7 hours of active reading

Game Time Decision

Thanks yr for the recipe

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Col. Duke LaCross

Is that his flatbread pizza from a couple years ago? That is damn good!

Game Time Decision

It is. Family favourite
I think it’s better than any delivery

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I thought we were done making fun of Justin Herbert’s complexion.

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Game Time Decision

We are but it’s smarter than Herbert

Gumbygirl

Seems like he’s got a handle on that. You could say he’s been….Proactiv.

Gumbygirl

Ooooooooh! Yeah Right is the man. Yeah Righteous!

Doktor Zymm

Lady at the checkin desk is a Packers fan, good fun

Doktor Zymm

Instead of the split jersey, moms should swap jerseys during the game based on which child is playing better. EARN THAT MATERNAL LOVE

Redshirt

If the score is tied, neutral coloured t-shirt.

Game Time Decision

Or no shirt
-B Belichick

King Hippo

We had Cook v. Cook (great game), Chubb v. Chubb (meh, unless Wakey or Dunstan), now Bosa v. Bosa (spicy meatballs??)

King Hippo

Hey, at least our resident Beer Guy can enjoy some happy drunkenness.

ballsofsteelandfury

Every one of them. I hope he dated every single one of them.

WCS

No question.