Your Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

T’was nice of dad to drop by-I guess these brief visits are so we don’t get spoiled or anything like that.

A Bit of Stuff:

-Mike White’s pain tolerance must be pretty high. And speaking of pretty high, I think that’s what he’ll be at game time when the pain shots kick in. If after the game he says to reporters, “I missed that purple elephant on that Go! route but otherwise I’m happy with my performance.” then we’ll know he took just the right amount. ie. A Hippo-sponsored dose

-Tyler Huntley has exited the concussion protocol and and has said that he’s looking forward to the game and his next head injury. Trainers insist that everything’s just peachy.

-Detroit must be looking in on this game with a modicum of interest because a Seahawks loss would increase their odds of getting a wildcard berth significantly. They currently sit at 5th (just 3 get in) with Seattle just ahead of them and the Commies and Giants further up the chart. They play each other so the loser of that game comes back to the pack.

To The Game!

Niners/Seahawks:

-A month ago these squadoos were neck and neck but then San Fran threw it into a higher gear while Seattle slipped it into neutral.

-The Niners have won six straight which is the league’s current longest win streak. The past 4 wins have been by 10+ points and they’ve not allowed more than 16 points.

-Meanwhile Seattle’s D have given up 200+ yards rushing the last two weeks. Once to Vegas (ok, Jacobs ran wild) and the other to [squints] Carolina…?

-They also have a knack for giving up big gains, having surrendered 44 plays of 10+ yards rushing and 43 20+ passing plays for a total of 87. For reference the Niners have given up 40 altogether.

-Back To Earth?: With the D struggling so much it would appear that Geno is pressing the issue and has not looked good. Last week he had 2 INT’s and his lowest throwing completion percentage of the year.

-This looks like a great spot for Aiyuk to blow up given that Deebo is out.

It’s all yours.

 

 

5 4 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
131 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So apparently Space Karen is banning journalists who “dox” him (by posting the publicly available location of his private jet). I’m wondering if tonight is the night that twitter actually dies. Not, like, shuts down its servers. But if tonight will be the tipping point where the content producers who are most valuable to advertisers (i.e. news organizations) begin to abandon the platform en masse.

Mr. Ayo

He’s so stupid. It’s public information.

https://www.wheresmusk.com/

Just burn that 44B down man.

WCS

comment image

Carl needs to have a chat with Musky.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“He’s definitely the most poised rookie I’ve ever had.” — Kyle Shanahan with high praise for Brock Purdy

Ah, there’s the fix I was looking for. Pump that poise straight into my veins.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Wow. Six years really did fly by.

https://doorfliesopen.com/2016/09/17/the-poise-boyz/

Brocky

That’s good hustle!

Senor Weaselo

Call him Mr. Poise!

Brick Meathook

I just ate a Fatboy ice cream sandwich.

It was, as you Americans say, tres delicious.

ballsofsteelandfury
Brocky

Someone is going to lose a fantasy playoff game because the niners didn’t score there

Brick Meathook

comment image

Brocky

I like the joke, but I’m not sure this meme is the best use of it

Brick Meathook

The cat meme makes the joke 3.65 times funnier. It’s science, folks.

Brocky

I’ve always thought the cat represented genuine confusion and the feeling of getting random accusations.

Like the cat has to be the victim

Brick Meathook

The cat is holding court with his crew and is annoyed with this wench. He’s about to have security toss her out of the club.

Sharkbait

Should I put this on? My current viewing option is a marathon of Bobs Burgers Christmas episodes on my Plex server

BrettFavresColonoscopy

You should not

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ugh. If you are going to need a two point conversion – which you ARE – you should do it right away. No point in waiting.

Redshirt

I’m the opposite. Right now, you have the momentum. You go for it and miss, its still two scores so no real difference. You kick the PAT, suddenly its one score and the other team starts to get nervous.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yes but you are overlooking that fact that if they had gotten it it would have been worth three points in fantasy for me (via defense getting 4 points for giving up 13, but only 1 for giving up 14).

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Smells like Geno Spirit!” according to the Spanish broadcast.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[yawns sleepily] – Shan’Khor

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That was more igneous rock than solid Gould

Brick Meathook

comment image

ballsofsteelandfury

comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I swear to God on the spanish broadcast they said something along the lines of “missing the chili cook-off”.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Part of me wants to stay up for one more drive, and the rational part of me doesn’t understand why I’m watching in the first place.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My excuse is that it’s a pretty important game for my fantasy team.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

You’re also three hours behind me.

Mr. Ayo

Great day for Seattle sport fans. Kraken lost. HOX losing. Ners not doing anything in free agency. And the Sonics are still long gone.

Redshirt

Reds are doing less than Seattle. They have no guaranteed contracts past 2023 and they are still talking about cutting back on payroll. At this point, their payroll will be less than a local McDonalds restaurant.

BeefReeferLives

“payroll will be less than a local McDonalds restaurant”

/Bob Nutting has entered the chat

Redshirt

Amazon won’t let me watch the game so I can only assume I am missing The Greatest Game Ever!!!

Sharkbait

Narrator: He wasn’t.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The refs are certainly committed to making it competitive.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That play reminds me of an old joke. What’s the difference between a rolling stone and a Scottish farmer?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

A Rolling Stone says “hey you get off of my cloud!” and a Scottish farmer says “hey McCloud, get off of my ewe!”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

If I bought this chopped liver on Monday, I better finish it tonight, huh?

Dunstan

“Can’t believe you’re hesitant to eat me. I mean, what am I…? Oh, right”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When are they gonna start talking about how much POISE is being demonstrated by Purdy?

Gumbygirl

Does he have POISE in his PANTS?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No yards, but at least Metcalf can take some solace in bouncing Ward’s head off the ground like a basketball.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, I suppose I can’t complain about fantasy crap if my tight end is gonna score those kinds of touchdowns.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And if the officials are gonna overturn touchdowns for my opponent like that.

Brick Meathook

comment image

BugEyedBoo

I’m still laughing at that cadmium beef syrup.

Doktor Zymm

Ooh, found a special about the building of the Burj Khalifa, they got generators that are 4 tons too heavy! I wonder how many guest workers got killed, I mean AHEM deported for that screw up!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

No, no, it’s Mia Khalifa screwing everyone….

litre_cola

Is she Wiz’s sister?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I started Seattle’s defense for that EXACT reason and Seattle is just gonna drop those? I feel so Brocky.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also my opponent has the 49ers defense.

Mr. Ayo

Well, they didn’t house that fumble at least.

Don T

😁

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

Doktor Zymm

The BBC is reporting that toxic spinach is causing hallucinations and delerium in Australia

WCS

In other news, nothing has changed about Australia.

Doktor Zymm

After extensive consideration, I’ve decided that French is all an elaborate prank. There is no way that is a real language that millions of people speak. It’s just the Normans with a stuffy nose laughing at the rest of us

herodotus450

Eh le wine et le fromage et…. me gusto et me estomago

Doktor Zymm

Maybe if you combine Welsh and French you get a real language that unlocks the secrets of the universe!

Dunstan

The French like wine. Wine is fermented grape juice. Grape juice is made by Welch’s. Coincidence? Oh, you’d like me to think so!

Gumbygirl

Your theory makes sense to me!

Mad-hatter2.png
BrettFavresColonoscopy

This is actually the first time I’ve watched Geno live this season. That completion was behind Metcalf but DK made the play, then the next one was a bad read and another throw behind him, then meh out in the flat. So I’m not impressed yet.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That throw to the tight end at the goal line should have been picked.

Doktor Zymm

You ever notice that French men and Turkish men wear scarves in the same way?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

herodotus450

Anybody got the line on some good NFTs these days?

Don T

The lingo is: sellers are either brokers or dealers, buyers are suckers.

litre_cola

OH MY GOD DID YOU KNOW THEY THROW FISH?!?!?!?!? – J Bettis, Detroit MI

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Huh. I bet Kobe Bryant didn’t see that one coming.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m just warming up, I promise most of my Kobe jokes won’t crash and burn like this.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Man, you really can’t pass them up, even if they’re as obvious as hitting the side of a mountain

Doktor Zymm

I can’t find the game on tv here, so gonna watch the end of the Bob’s Burgers movie instead

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just got home from work, did they toss any fish yet? Are there any left to toss?

Gumbygirl

It’s always the same fish. The shark from the Edgewater/ Zeppelin deal.

Don T

The ESPN pre-production crew picked out the fish the morning of the game. Once they went with blowfish and a scab crew had to be flown in.

Gumbygirl

Like Mike White, I am pretty high!

Gumbygirl

1,076 ft.

Doktor Zymm

I’m on deck 4, so I think I am exactly at sea level!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Deck four” sounds like something Riley Cooper fantasizes about doing at a Kenny Chesney concert

Last edited 1 year ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
litre_cola

So, we are cheering for Brock Purdy right? Or is he a closet Qanon guy, or Elon fan?

Doktor Zymm

He hasn’t been around enough for his warts to show

Game Time Decision

They make good chocolate

https://www.purdys.com/

Doktor Zymm

I found another person who espouses my BS theory of ice cream melting and filling in the cracks when you think you are full! It’s totally incorrect and nonsensical, but there is always room for ice cream!

Doktor Zymm

Oh, so cinnamon ice cream goes really well with crianza!

Gumbygirl

The fake cinnamon gives me a mouth full of hives. I can’t chew cinnamon gum or use Colgate.

Doktor Zymm

Fake cinnamon and real are miles apart, probably moreso than anything else. Maybe fake and real cherry is similar?

Gumbygirl

Fake and real grape. Not even the same planet!

Doktor Zymm

Yes!

Doktor Zymm

I’m probably part of the problem here, if it is good cinnamon I will eat it in medicinal quantities

litre_cola

No Alberta Premium Vodka and a Big Turk for you. (just horrible vodka)

I started the league when TWBS left, I have never made the playoffs.

Doktor Zymm

I kind of want to offer a last place prize, but no idea what would be appropriate

litre_cola

Malort.

Gumbygirl

That’s just cruel. That shit is deffo top 10 of the worst things I’ve ever ingested. I have full body shudders just thinking about it.

Doktor Zymm

I kinda don’t hate it, and so do at least 4 other people I know. But I’m okay with bitter stuff. My thing I don’t like is sweet things I don’t think should be sweet. The only food I Struggle to get down is blood sausage.

litre_cola

Black pudding is delicious, button mushrooms can get fucked.

Doktor Zymm

Maybe if it’s charred enough, I’ve only had it in the Eastern European context which is my heritage and my babcia loved some sort of blood soup, so it’s clearly wrong that I can’t stand it, but I had to chase it with potatoes to be polite last time I had it last year when one of the babushkas from the Chernobyl exclusion zone served it. I hope she’s okay, Russia went through there. She had a world map with where everyone who visited her was from.

Gumbygirl

Yeah, bitter is my least favorite flavor profile. It needs help, not a solo artist.

litre_cola

It pairs so well with jaded.

Gumbygirl

Needs a little existential ennui to bring out all of the notes.

Doktor Zymm

Consolation playoff?

Doktor Zymm

Winner!

litre_cola

Mrs Cola didn’t want her steak. Guess who is having 2 steaks!

Game Time Decision

Turf and turf

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Coach Reid!

/ha ha just kidding he’s having six

Duchess

***wakes up from a long slumber***

Who are all these people?

Game Time Decision

Is currently snowing here like it does in all those Hallmark movies when the “couple” is in some remote place and gonna get snowed in.
/they’re gonna fuuuuck

TheRevanchist

I’m glad your buddy was able to make it to your house.

Game Time Decision

Love being the little spoon

Doktor Zymm

I declare my attempt to pass off silk pjs as formal wear to be a success!

ballsofsteelandfury

So proud!

Don T

It’s the rage in Jakarta
/swishes by

litre_cola

Silk jalabas in Morocco end up looking like tents, so silky.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That seems like something Jameela Jamil would do, and since you pulled it off you and her are now frenemies.

Doktor Zymm

I don’t know who that is, but always happy to have a new frenemy!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

She was the posh one on The Good Place.

Redshirt

Time to see if Brock Purdy is purdy good like Lesnar or purdy bad like Osweiller.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Come on, Geno, throw some INTs and regress to the mean!

Redshirt

This may be like an Angels in the Outfield situation, where the little boy’s wish only works until the championship game.

Mr. Ayo

Fun fact. Geno has tossed 8 INTs this year. BUT, according to PFF he has thrown 22 turnover worthy passes this year. It’s been all smokes and mirrors. He’s exactly what everyone expected, just with more luck.