We’ve got a delightful 9/4 split of tilts which is the way it sorta should be in my opinion. Obviously bye weeks make this impossible but I want choices in the later window, damnit!
To The Games!
Niners/Raiders:
This should be an object lesson in what good coaching vs unreliable/inconsistent coaching looks like. Baby Shanny somehow cobbles together a dominant defense and a competent, boring offense every year despite numerous injuries. This year is no different. I wonder what Davante Adams is thinking right now.
Jets/Seahawks:
What to do, what to do. The Mother Lover just can’t seem to read coverages at the NFL level and that’s a super serious flaw. I assume he’s put in the time-there’s not been a mention otherwise that I’ve come across. I don’t think White is the long term answer, I just see him as a stop gap kinda fella. Maybe acquiring that ex-Raiders qb is the answer. He’s very conservative and risk-adjacent in his throws which is something that I think Saleh would like. Hmmm…
Vikes/Packers:
For the sake of my cheering sensibilities I’d like Minny to continue their fraudulent ways. Has a team ever relied on a wide receiver as much as the Vikings have during this run? When I think of dominant wr’s like Rice and Moss and Harrison I see them in a well-balanced offense with significant talent on the other side of the field (Taylor, Carter and Wayne) so that defenses couldn’t focus all their resources on the #1. Theilen isn’t that guy.
Rams/Chargers:
The Chargers just don’t seem like a playoff team to me given how bad their defense is. They should draft nothing but o-line and d-line guys next (this) year. Both Allen and Williams are getting up there and I don’t see Guyton and Palmer as viable replacements.
Do as thou wilt.
Mrs. Fozz is a hypochondriac, it’s an Italian thing, but she’s coughing like an orderly in a TB ward. Left to go to one of those rapid care places.
I am a terrible nurse. I think once during a pregnancy or maybe it was a stomach virus I yelled, “ICE UP SON!”
It was meant to be funny. She did not agree.
Hey, call me impressed. You’re still alive.
Purdy is gonna fuck the 49ers in the playoffs.
boo. My resell value plummets!
WOOP
(sorry Rikki)
That’s okay. I’m just glad to see that the team hasn’t quit on McDaniels.
Looks like Mr. Ayo is going to win the TWBS freezer vodka league. No 2 time defending Spampion.
Minshew Mania and DUUUUUVAL’s defense carried me to victory.
Just like I planned at the beginning of the season.
Congrats!
I’m just pissed my team closed out the season so strongly then shit the bed in the very first playoff game
Hey, at least it was also to Ayo?
Yes good job Ayo, enjoy your gently-used TurkLight.
Geno Smith 3-0 revenge tour complete. Guess we’ll always have that to admire.
Armchair GM: 3 years 45 mil for Geno, do you pay it?
No, but I’ve been wrong about him before
The one good late game and it’s not in my market.
https://twitter.com/SilverBlakPride/status/1609705981059170305
I went off to do some stuff and what happens? Niners/Raiders goes bananacakes AND I have the banner!
Holy shit. please let the Raiders win, our 2nd batch of tickets are about to go for big money.
Helps both of us too.
Robbie Fools Gould
EXTRA FOOTED BALLS COURTESY OF SHANKLOR!!!
Well, shit
Nailed It!
– B. Walsh
Spotted this in the crowd leaving the Seahawks game.
Those are becoming popular.
NGL, I’m not watching football today. Turning yesterday’s meatballs into today’s meatball sub and about to watch Knives Out 2: Billionaire Onion Boogaloo.
I gifted the eldest and her family a box of 5 different types of real Wisconsin cheese. Thanks Cheese Brothers.
For some inexplicable reason Eldest and eldest granddaughter can’t tolerate capsaicin – I know! DNA testing to follow – so they left me a slab of mango habanero gouda so I mixed some in along with minced jalapeno into my cornbread mix.
That shit was fantastic. Plus the oven being on made the homestead nice and comfy.
Fabulous start food wise to the new year.
DAMN that was tasty.
You had me at spicy cheese and cornbread
Awfully ungrateful of Wisconsin to pummel your Vikes after you bought their cheese!
I just had some Tomsula brand gumbo, which consisted of some cajun sausage that had been in the freezer for six months and some brown rice.
Not that I’m particularly heartbroken about it, but it’s a pretty savage insult that the “bonus coverage” provided by CBS is of the blowout in Green Bay and not of the Raiders-49ers.
Agreed – game is on FOX, though. (ARGH)
RedZone’s all in on the Niners Raiders right now. At least for 15 more minutes
As is GameDay
Ah, that explains it.
The Shield values a few meaningless seconds of Qaron more than an actually competitive game
I see the Jason Myers revenge game is goin exactly as expected. Leave it to the Jets to get punched in the jaw when it matters most.
Seattle tried to get them back into it and they, White mostly, said nope don’t want it.
Let’s not pile on the Jets unnecessarily – from their perspective, it *never* matters.
Once again, death, taxes, Jets. Even my friend messaged me it!
Not even a box of Twinkies could explain White’s actions today.
I have him on my fantasy team for the 3rd place game in the tWBS Memorial League against Balls since I am sans both Tua and Kyler. There is your explanation.
Pack….MAY just have this one. More competitive game plz. Such as…I dunno, NYNURZ vs RAIIDUUUUUUUHHHS, maybe?
…which is on Fox, dammit
Ok, Grape Japanese gummy candy does nawt pair well with Malbec. I will switch to dark chocolate Bacci
Bloated, fat, hungover, and tired of football.
I feel like Greg Roman.
Guess I’ll go and call a really shitty offensive scheme and ignore the fact that the run game is working and start passing 57 times in a row.
If you take a stack of grocery bags from the food bank, you can draw up plays on them from your car. – Jim Tomsula
Shank’lor pays Seattle a visit.
https://twitter.com/GMoneyELITE/status/1609632178572505089?s=20&t=pIhfCVzVvJgnS8ZRI8141Q
Stidham just saved McDaniels for 1 more year
Minny collapsing when the shit hits the fan is so on brand.
And turnovers in important spots is VERY Dingleberry
Vegas is a dangerous place if you’re young and Purdy
you must ask for half up front. Always
My oldest is going to the Ravens-Steelers game tonight with his buddies. While I have continued to tell my wife there’s nothing to worry about, I’m worrying quietly so as not to show I have feelings.
Middle son comes home last night with his buddy, who was literally grey. He puked in the toilet.
My niece left her car at our house last night, came back with her friends to pick it up. Her friend proceeded to barf on our front lawn.
Then my oldest rolls in, painfully hungover. Talks to me for a few minutes, calmly walks out of the room. And barfs in the sink.
None of these fucking kids can hold their alcohol.
You must be so proud.
Hey, they made it to appropriate places to vomit, that’s pretty good at that age! Especially considering the swill they were probably drinking
Their problem is that they switch from beer to those fancy seltzer drinks, to Twisted Teas. I’ve told them: liquor to beer, in the clear. Beer to liquor never sicker.
All whiskey’s good, some whiskey’s better. Took me until age 40 to figure out fizzy sweet shit is whats wrong, not the booze itself. Haven’t had a noteworthy hangover since. Used to need to pray almost every time
His name checks out.
Old Family Guy episodes are proving more interesting than the afternoon games.
I think Raiders 9ers is ok.
Hox doing a good Flight 93 imitation. Fighting til the end but they’re already doomed.
We ordered a big mess of Vietnamese food for sloth day. Decilitre only wants plain rice and has eaten a tonne of it. Quite odd.
Maybe he is secretly Irani, add some butter to the rice and see if he eats it faster!
Oooh I love Persian cuisine!!!
It is delicious! Not good for you at all, but delicious!
Fun fact: I seem to always get Vietnamese and Thai food reversed. Senorita Weaselo has turned this into an inside joke.
How could you pho-get something like that?
Dueling Nailed Its!
— B. Walsh
Fucking Vikings. Those White Nationalist took your cool runes because you’re too much of pussies to fight back
Home and Redzone on! Hurrah!
Looks like Minny’s O-line is still hungover from their New Year’s Party
Stidham? Also, you’re a piece of shit Minny.
Just an absolute fraud of a team.
And I say that knowing full well Dallas is going to find a way to trip over their own dicks and fall out of the play-offs in their first game.
Frauds? Didja watch the Iggles today????
They have a couple legit reasons to play less than 100%, although it doesn’t really bode well for the playoffs
Nope. But the Eagles aren’t the Eagles if Hurts wasn’t playing.
If he was playing, well, that would be bad.
“Derek Who?” – Davante Adams, after that throw
UNplanned naps are the best naps.
The cop who woke me up in the median begs to differ.
Nailed it!
Get your shit together Minny.
-Mickey, after catching her in bed with Goofy.
Nah.
The Shield wants Green Bay
I thought Green Bay went out when Detroit won today?
GB controls destiny after Washington loss.
Man, Carson Wentz just sucks on so many levels.
Somebody needs to lose in the Divisional Round.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tGL-buZ94Y
Minny was a total whore
Problems always arise when Cousins force things they shouldn’t.
Well, Tawmmy, you’ve won the South with a .500 record (since nobody else seems to have wanted it).
Hope it was all worth it.
Eh, families come and go, but getting exposed as a total fraud in the first round of the playoffs is FOREVER!
Banner this lady, please!
I’m a Bengals fan, and I concur this message.
Me: With the new rules you should never bring a kick-off out of the end zone.
Packers: Shut up, nerd.
Looks like Walker III is fully recovered
AJ Brown ran a lazy ass route.
https://twitter.com/lequan_w/status/1609654684998045697?s=20&t=TaY-7hFoiVrrk0bmV_lvzw
https://twitter.com/barstoolsports/status/1609631528274825217?s=20&t=TaY-7hFoiVrrk0bmV_lvzw
“That’s outrageous! Somebody outta do something!” – All Seven Referees
Is it too soon to say fuck this year? Because fuck this year.
That new coach smell didn’t last long.
Turns out was just gas. Again.
I said it as soon as Ohio State’s FG attempt noped itself away from the uprights.