Huzzah September and a Full Sportsball Day

Autumn, indeed, is proof that God loves us.  Football everywhere, y’all.

Team Knifey host Everton early in the morning (7:30, USA).  Midweek, the Toffees very narrowly averted disaster (ie, losing in the Cursed Caribou Cup to team #92 out of 92 in the English Football League).  But fuck it, at least we made a soccer point.  Finally.  Must at least snatch a Draw here.  Probably won’t.

Chelski/Forest is USA’s broadcast pick for the 10:00 window.  Meh.  Discerning viewers shall opt for City of Men/Mighty Whitey on Peacock.

Trashbirds host their second straight Spotlight Dance, and hopefully they turn up for this’un – especially with the Bonesaws on the menu (12:30, NBC).

Lastly, the King’s Afrikan Water Pistols close out the weekend, hosting Men Untied for Sunday brunch (11:30, NBC).  Our first stupid international break follows, so enjoy it while you can.

JV NFL, WOO!!!

Wahoowa (+28) at Tennessee (Noon, ABC)

Jeebus, nobody is expecting anything near competence from UVA, but a 4 TD underdog?  Lots of orange, make sure to flip around to give your retinas a rest.

Colorado (+20.5) at TCU (Noon, Fox)

Do you like Narrative?  Of course you do.  At least Fox thinks so.

Utah State (+23.5) at Iowa (Noon, FS1)

Good Christ, it appears that Vegas expects Team Secular Big Love State to score negative points on offense?  RISE TO TEH CHALLENGE, Aggies.

tOhio State (+30) at Indiana (3:30, CBS)

I recommend a nap here, especially in the Brocky household.

Boise State (+14) at Washington (3:30, ABC)

Yes, this truly is the most competitive of our early matchups.  Not sure I’d call it “compelling” but I guess if nap-averse, one has to watch something.