The hits just keep on coming!*
*resulting in bruises, contusions, aches, pains, concussions, sprains and surgeries
We’ve a few more matchups, let’s take a quick glance.
To The Games!
Raiders/Chargers:
I almost took Vegas in my ‘loser’ pool because of the QB situation, the general turdmoil and especially the distraction to the team that is the slow-moving disaster of the Chandler Jones saga. Turns out the Raiders concerns were quite valid and they responded-although ham-handedly-by inquiring into his well-being in person. (which Jones laughed off) Where was I? Oh, I’m sure Vegas is going to come up short here but you know one team that can come up shorter? The Chargers. Their ability to underwhelm at any given point in the schedule or during a game is unparalleled. So much talent, so little gumption.
Pats/Cowboys:
How does one respond to the ambush/letdown that was last week’s loss to the Cards? Prop-wise I’d take Zeke’s 27.5 rushing number every time. He had 16 carries last week and was more efficient than Stevenson. Am I missing something here? Right, the vagaries of Belichick’s player usage. I trust that he’ll ride him into the ground though. Keep an eye on the very banged up 0-line of the Cowboys.
Cards/Niners:
“They Never Stood a Chance”. That’s the obituary of the game for Arizona today. Play any and all of your San Fran fantasy assets and sit back and rest easy, though I’m sure it won’t be pretty to watch.
Stay safe out there on your couch.
The Legend of White Mac – Denouement
You win, and will be cited in the morn
Zappe warming up! THIS IS NOT A DRILL FOLKS! White Mac is going into the Country Crock tub and into the fridge.
“We can do that?” – Zac T., OH
khalil mack is back
Mack’s got six sacks today. I don’t know if he played six games the last two years he was in Chicago.
Those Cardinals away kits aren’t terrible. I would’ve replaced the silver CARDINALS stripe on the sleeves with a yellow stripe, but still, its a noticeable improvement.
THIS GAME, I CALL IT THE BATTLE OF CHARLESTON, SC BECAUSE PATRIOTS ARE GETTING MURDERED.
WELL I CALL IT THE BATTLE OF FORT SUMTER, BECAUSE THE PATRIOTS ARE BEING BOMBARDED AND A GOOD PORTION OF THE POPULATION IS IN REBELLION.
Gonna do the patented move of sticking Mac on a lobstah schoonah and then firin’ a cannon at him as he leaves the hahbah. Only way to deal with the current problem.
I don’t want to get my hopes up, but go Cardinals?
-The Pope, after telling them to stop diddling kids.
Dallas is working on an “Andy Reid” worth of turnovers and Mac is serving them up piping hot.
“wait until andy sees me!”
-milf hunter zac
The Legend of White Mac – Final Chapter?
WEAH CALLIN HIM LABSTAH MAC CAUSE THIS GUY IF FACKIN COOKED. NO ONE DENIES THIS!
Watching children’s sports with millennial parents is worse than being shut in a closet with Donald Trump on a meth binge.
Are you or Trump on the binge?
Trump. I can only imagine. Those parents are just fucking morons. They have no idea what they’re saying and you would think we’re watching the World Cup.
Just to revisit, the Bears blew a 21-point second-half lead, at home, to a team that had lost 70-20 the week before. Truly an achievement for the ages.
Didn’t even need OT to do it!
Maybe we should stop saying “step on their neck” during an NFL broadcast?
Should it be replaced with “Hit them in the mouth like that one ex-girlfriend” ?
“Slap them like Ray Rice in an elevator.”
“stab em while wearing a white suit!”
“Hit them with a switch you cut off a tree.”
“LOOKIT MAH GOTTDAMMED STARS OUT THERE! DOUBLE MY ORDER OF POST GAME COKE AND TRIPLE THE NUMBER OF WHORES! YEEEEEeeeeeeeHHAAAAAAWWwwwwwww I AM FUCKIN’ CRAZY!”
OWAH TEAM IS GAWNA COME BAHK IN THE SECOND HAWF. I SAW BRADY SUITING UP!
Narrator: “Unfortunately, it was Brady Quinn that he saw suiting up.”
Legend of White Mac is becoming more of a cautionary legend now, like Legend with Mia Sara, Tom Cruise, and Tim Curry.
Legend is one of two Tom Cruise movies I’ve seen the whole way through. I can’t think of the name of the second one, but he played a samurai.
Gumby hasn’t made you sit through Top Gun? What is the Navy coming to?
That’s Top Gun you’re thinking of.
Nope, samurai. Japan. I saw the tighty whitey dancing thing from Risky Business, about a quarter of Top Gun, maybe half of Rain Man, and none of anything else. I will never get to Xenu.
Edge of Tomorrow is a really, really great sci-fi movie. One of the best ones out there, honestly.
And you get to see him die over and over
Hmmmm, I would enjoy that!
That’s a great flick. So great I converted to Scientology.
Collateral is the best Tom Cruise movie
Ain’t no pregnant teenagers in that. By that criteria, “All The Right Moves” is the best Cruise movie.
The Last Samurai?
Yup
patriots bein killed https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJ4UwE5WNI0
I’m gonna kill myself and it’s all the Cowboys’ fault.
Pick6 baby.
THESE PATRIOTS, I CALL THEM A CATTLE DRIVE TO THE STOCKYARDS BECAUSE THESE COWBOYS ARE DOING UNSPEAKABLE THINGS TO THEM, AND IN THE END, THEY’LL BE SLAUGHTERED!
Justin Herbert has 2 rushing TD’s today because nothing makes sense anymore. While we’re at it, Justin Trudeau ran an interception back for 6. Dorothy Parker has blocked a field goal attempt. Miles Davis’ pass-blocking has improved. Mies van der Rohe is telling me to shut it down. Whatever.
An update: There will be LemonJello Boots On The Ground for Ursine Fields Shitters V. Commander Redacteds!
Try to avoid the Sewage Seats.
Look away Redshirt
https://twitter.com/edsbs/status/1708595318923669525
tbf, this is what 95% of all wideouts think, and sometimes say in the huddle
Start Browning or McCarron and put Burrow on ice until he can run a 5K. He can’t run or throw deep.
Good night, and good luck
Sweet dreams (of world domination), Dok!
Walked back to my hotel and gonna sleep now, but also feeling kinda old now that I’m nawt surrounded by people 20+ years older than me
Also, I Am bad at fantasy footsballs
deablo with the chokeslam from hell
Colin Cowherd should be fired into the sun.
horse drawn and quartered, remains left for the buzzards, leftovers sent through a pulper
then fired into the sun
You forgot staked out on a fire ant mound.
His remains shall be mixed with mayonnaise and used as sandwiches for dogs.
Seems cruel to the dogs.
Dogs eat their own poop, so this sandwich wouldn’t taste much different.
Cant we just banish him to wilderness?
Don’t be a buzzkill, Spur!
POINT OF ORDER – just because these games are mandatory to WATCH? Doesn’t mean you have to leave the sound on.
This slate of games is just the tip for the KC vs Jests pounding later tonight
Imagine how freaked NBC would be, if not for the Swifties
Diane Feinstein was in the ’49’ers Super Bowl parade way back in the day! Who gives a rat’s fuck?
considering how her last couple of years of her life went, she can still go to the next one this year if they win and no one would notice
they wouldn’t have won that 1981 title without her, ppl forget that
1984 either
Yeah, Big Boy 2 pt conversion!
Vander with the TD! Good for him
That’s My Raiders!
/but seriously, this is why I shouldn’t watch the NFL anymore – they didn’t even review it even though a) it was a turnover and b) Farva’s arm was still moving forward when it came loose.
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
I thought they had the crazy guy locked up?
HI! I’M MARK DAVIS AND HAVE YOU SEEN WHERE MY TODAY GIRLFRIEND WENT?
Raiders with a late OOB hit on Herbert. it was beautiful
Yeah if you’re gonna get ejected for unnecessary roughness at least get your money’s worth, and he certainly did.
I am not paying great attention and thought that JuJu catch was a P*ts pickerception.
Eberflus needs to be put on raft and sent down river.
Just got back from taking the Lady LemonJello out for her birthday – brunch and drinks on a sunny Sunday.
Oh, by the way:
DDUUUUUUUUUUVVVVVVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!
I’m still salty they screwed me in last weeks Elimination Challenge, but Happiest Birthday Lady Lemonjello!
So now Zeke wants to try and run
He remembers where he stashed some lead paint chips in the endzones of Jerral’s penis compensator stadium
*sigh*
The damn 49ers are winning the Super Bowl, aren’t they
Gumby sez he’s prettay sure Maxxxxxxx Crosby is a serial killer.
Vegas has a healthy transient population to prey on
Took a monster nap, got up see the last quarter of the morning games. Would do again.
I woke up at 6:30 for the mandatory game I didn’t have access to, went back to bed at 7 ish, and woke up for the second half of Rammit. 100% recommend!
Woke up, took the youngest to soccer, meanwhile Mrs. Fozz watched mass with the two oldest. This never, ever works. When I came home the atmosphere was . . .napalmy.
…and Joey Votto has been ejected from his last game due to the umpire being both blind and incapable of any criticism.
This is why I gave up on baseball.
Haven’t watched since the first few weeks of the dumb COVID season. Do not miss it.
glory to the greatest tank commander of our time, marshall justin zhukov fields
https://youtu.be/Yg5m4ua1agI?si=CtKeoBAJf-QUoUjc
Who called the fourth and one? Pretty sure that’s the tank commander.
No, they didn’t.
Hey, WVU won last night, the US got prison-bitched in the Ryder Cup, and absolutely nothing else happened.
Sounds like textbook Post AFC South Traumatic SD.
I love it when rugby players kick it over a would-be tackler’s head and chase it down themselves. I wish there was an NFL equivalent. It’s so fun.
FARVADOWN!
AOC got thicc (getting fat off the backs of the MURRIKAN TAXPAYER obvs)
Drank beers during the Ravens game, gonna go cut the lawn.
ah, the yearly los angeles raiders home game
puka nacua should be a cocktail at this point
especially since he’s a Mormon!
ah, so it should have milk in it
[starts humming “Hakuna Matata” to himself] – Eli Manning
That tuddy by Nacua put me in shape to be 4-1 in both my FF leagues. Now to hang some Halloween decor, then nap.
Posted in the early thread because I don’t pay attention, but I said I’d give Expo updates, and they’re eating Reapers at the Stage of Doom.
Senorita Weaselo: “Senor, what makes a Buffalo sauce?”
Me: “I know we already said hi to Maggie [Dilley, who has taken over after John passed] but let’s go back to DEFCON.”
Well, now she knows!
UNEXPECPECTED TIES
OK, one fewer with the Iggles score
Give my regards to Dr. Leary
That appears to be two ties. Cool knot!