Some weeks, I just can’t really be arsed to preview all the Lesser Footy. Especially with the German Elton John up on his cross again, wailing about the Spurs match/VAR fuck-up. You’ve gotten waaaaayyyyyy more than your fair share of oopsie-doodles over the years, please just STFU.
Full schedule is here, talk about the fixtures in comments still. Please!
As y’all may have noticed, we got some good parity going on. For once, there is no dominant – perhaps no even “very good” – SEC behemoth. The deepest conference looks like the last edition of the PAC-(MOAR THAN 2), and I expect a lot of circular firing squad action. B1G remains same as it ever was. tOSU, Meeechigan, Paedo State, and chaff.
October will do some sorting, and hopefully some solid entertaining. First up…
Oklahoma (+6) v. Texas (Neutral Liek WICHITA! – Noon, ABC)
Steerfuckers Derby, Red River Shootout, whatever you want to call it (just not the sanitized, PC verbiage). Okiehoma got their shit pushed in last year, and will be out for vengeance. I’m not particularly confident that they will get it. But heck, maybe we will at least see a few fights. Gotta impress Bessie, you know?
LSU (-5) at Missouri (Noon, ESPN)
Shit or get off the (contention) pot time, for Brian Kelly’s lot. They’re cornered, and Mizzou is very much NOT used to the weight of expectations. Such a wide range of potential outcomes makes this a tasty watch (at least for me). Recall that Eli Drinkwitz was the former/last good offensive coordinator at NC State. I told my Wolven brethren we’d regret letting him leave town, and all agree. Now they do, anyway.
Washington State (+3.5) at UCLA (3:00, PAC-12)
This is a really good/fun matchup, and relegating it to PAC-12 network coverage is borderline criminal. Maybe a microcosm of how shitty this walking ded league has been at marketing basics?
Alabama (-1) at Texas A&M (3:30, CBS)
Another week, another Roll Damn Obituary is queued up and ready to go. Bonfire Cult has a legitimately excellent defense, so the placement men might rule the day.
UCF (+1.5) at Kansas (4:00, Fox)
Lookit Rock Chalk getting some national teevee love! It gets even stranger tonight, just wait. We’ll see how much hangover there is from last week’s loss in Austin, but if the KU quartered back is healthy, I really expect them to roll here.
Ireland’s got this one pretty well in hand. And despite the uniform similarities, it’s extremely unlikely that they’re going to Jets it up in the second half.
[trying to work out a Potato Famine joke, somehow]
-Me and Horatio
Semi-related, been reading “We Don’t Know Ourselves” by Fintan O’Toole, about growing up during Ireland’s dramatic social changes from the 60’s on. Really good read.
(so far not a lot of potato jokes)
Man, I know Oklahoma isn’t much better, but any game ending in a way that sends thousands of Texans home in tears is a good game.
Another NFL equivalent! The ref getting hit with the ball!
Dooooooooooooon’t caaaaaaaaaaaaare!
[Excitedly] “Gary Danielson Is Doing The Announcing for Texas A&M/Bama!”
Was this said by-
Marshall’s coach looks like John McClain’s “cop friend on the walkie talkie” from Die Hard. Just a stone or so thinner.
He needs a few more Twinkies.
He was emotionally shattered because of that time when he went for 2 instead of kicking for the tie. Had to take an offensive coordinator desk job because he couldn’t Hackett.
yellow dye #5, everything a growing boy needs
MUFFED PUNT EQUIVALENT!
THESE REFEREES I CALL THEM ROBERT THE BRUCE BECAUSE THEY APPEAR TO HAVE VICIOUSLY BETRAYED A GROUP OF SCOTSMEN.
Teevee commercial that’s lidderally just people screaming the whole time. Who are the ad wizards who came up with that one…
“I think it’s safe to assume they are graduates of House Slytherin.” – Eli Manning
Excellent equivalent of red zone defense by Ireland.
Turtles on their back now.
Ireland vs. Scotland is happening now. Winner gets a place in the quarterfinals, loser (barring a miracle) goes home.
Taulia needed a few more childhood beatings to make avoid that pick
Hippo was THIS CLOSE to saying if Maryland wins this game, I will eat a piece of cheese.
A nice wedge of Roquefort for the gentleman?
Or perhaps a lovely sheep’s milk cheese while sipping a chilled glass of vinho verde on your private yacht rental?
“For every piece of cheese you don’t eat, I’ll eat three.” – Coach Reid
An older reference, but it should check out fine.
“You miss 100% of the cheeses you don’t eat.”
–B. Daboll
Meanwhile, I’m faced here with a dilemma… I can either see why the grandparents (that disowned me for me not helping out my fuckup cousins with money an’ a “good word with my bosses… and a place to stay for free for a couple of months” ) are trying to call me repeatedly. Or I can order room service and play some Starfield (while listening to some college football I know fuck all about). Decisions, decisions… Also, wtf is malort?
Malort is Chicago sewage infused with alcohol.
… ok, I’m actually intrigued, though at 35% ABV, it is kinda weak for me. Is there something similar, but for grownups, or should I just combine it with some grain alcohol?
And somehow that’s a flattering way to say it
And they only bottle it one day a year!
I am reading a non-fiction history “Spies” is the title (too lazy to go look up author, some British fucker IIRC). Boy howdy, does he NOT like the Kennedys. Looks like maybe RFK Jr. didn’t fall to far from the tree after all.
Seeing that the Trump team is worried about Frankenkennedy taking away GOP votes was pretty cool.
That’s the problem with making a paranoid weirdo your wind-up toy – they start believing their own bullshit and then you can’t control the aftermath.
Trump would be a good example of this.
I went to a prep HS in No. Virginia and I was on the fringe of the vague party circuit of the RFK kids. I didn’t know any of them personally but they all had strong reputations as being druggy rich kid fuck ups.
And RFK was absolutely canonized in my youth as well. The more I read about him the less I like, as he was the family hit man with all the worst characteristics of both his father and his mother. Joe Jr. was almost universally disliked as a rich prick at Harvard (which is saying something at a school full of rich pricks) but died a war hero, if you count what he did as heroic or just unlucky. JFK always comes across as the best of them, even when they try to smear him. Teddy? Forget it. I went to one of his Christmas parties though in the early 90s and it was fun, to say the least. My girlfriend was best friends with a girl whose mother worked for Teddy and her boyfriend’s father had been Ambassador to Great Britain (just like Joe Sr! Joe Sr. wanted to be ambassador to Britain so bad FDR once made him drop his pants in the Oval Office to make sure he wasn’t bow legged).
For a poor kid, Brick sure does get around.
JFK was pretty much just an average dude (based on what I’ve read). Liked sports, fucking, etc.
“Sport Fucking”, more like it.
Big into whatever the 50’s-60’s equivalent of opiates, too.
He could pill out with me anyday, I’d happily ride his jetstream and bang his sloppy seconds!
Maryland with some horrific clock management that would make Mike McCarthy proud.
I haven’t seen a clock abused like that by a Marylander since McNulty falsely claimed all that overtime pay.
shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit
Luther Burden gave up a yard or two, getting the ball off the left hash. Smartest JV NFL play of the year.
Was that the intent or was he just trying for extra yards instinctually? Either way, thiccer kiccer made an ugly line drive. Go non-Bayou Tigers.
I think he did it on purpose, but he won’t answer my texts. WHORE.
Fair-minded read:
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/some-thoughts-and-speculations-on-the-crisis-in-israel
Very much so, however I’m not going to be the least bit surprised if Israel rallies around Netanyahu the way the U.S. did around George W. Bush, despite their negligent leadership making a disaster like this possible in the first place.
Okay folks let’s go to the DFO SoCal Weather Board!
Let’s see here, 2-3 PM looks a little toasty for some, but Playa and Peedro are looking good!
However, shitty ol’ Playa del Rey is gonna fog over at 1 PM, for the win!
Thanks for playing, folks. Stay hydrated.
But of course, is only niiiiiiice in Pedro
Still a bit of fog out there.
It’s a hard knock life.
We’re gonna hit 94 today, good thing my plans involve TV and couch.
How could I leave out Santa Ana?
Folks, I live in the poor part of Playa del Rey; SOS lives in the nice part of Santa Ana.
Anaheim, but po-tay-to, pa-pa
Anaheim Hills or Anaheim? Fullerton-adjacent?
“I should really fire up Peacock for Rutgers/Wisconsin” says absolutely fucking nobody
Apparently you can run on Ohio State. And pass.
Much like Hamas, once the shock factoUr wears off, Maryland is totally fucked.
woa
Irsay must have found the real good shit before signing that.
That was Irsay’s lesson from watching…Zach Moss doing pretty much the same jerb for 20% of the cost?
Turtles. My team is losing to turtles.
https://s.yimg.com/ny/api/res/1.2/zIlof64N1VHITmW.se56Qw–/YXBwaWQ9aGlnaGxhbmRlcjt3PTY0MDtoPTI1Ng–/https://media.zenfs.com/en/buzzfeed_articles_778/485a6f004fd660ae0cb0a0d38edd87c3
No shame in that
Crystal Palace has cheerleaders? I’m down.
You sure about that?
“Fresh from the streets of Sussex, they are!!”
Big win for Mighty Whitey. Family free weekend off to a bang!
Baker Mayfield is absolutely wasted, and loos like Wes Welker gave him some of the latter’s personal stash.
Also, g’day folks. How’re ya all this … so-so day?
Better than the Jaguars under Tom Coughlin.
Heh, that’s such a low bar, even lowratio can hurdle it without spilling his drink
Kinda incapacitated, so far. Hope to continue present pursuits.
So-so. It’s gonna be 95° here today (I think that’s 472Q-1 degrees Canadian) and the Dr. Mrs. wants to go out and do stuff, even though we went out and did stuff yesterday.
Here’s what you do, first you feign interest and start preparing (shaving, picking clothes, etc)… then, you have a sudden and completely unexpected stomach bug/muscle cramp.
That or .. you can rightfully ask her – how can we do stuff right now, when HAMAS on paragliders are attacking Israel.
Hamas is gonna have a really bad day when Israel shakes off the surprise factoUr. I’m sure they really enjoyed that first 24 hours, though.
Will this mean even MOAR freelance work for BK?
Oh, sweetie, the fact that Hamas somehow managed to do such a raid in such force the first place is damage enough for the IDF and Mossad. The fact that as of now, they are down at least 14 Merkavas (captured) and a fuckload of other heavy gear and have multiple confirmed POW is just icing on the cake for the Palestinians. The scarier bit at least from a professional standpoint is that unlike HAMAS, the Israelis did fuck all to learn from the stuff we’re seeing in Ukraine. That and how the Palestinians had ATGMs and MANPADs even before they managed to raid IDF depots raises questions on some of the photos one could see Romanian and Bulgarian manufacturers’ marks on mortar shells which leads to two really bad options. 1 Our Ukrainian “friends” have been selling weapons on the black market again (there’s already plenty of precedent, including Javelins in Syria and assault rifles and machine guns to gangs across the EU) or 2. Russia has started operation “karma’s a bitch” by sending out captured weapons to some very naughty people*. Ah, yes, and also that we’ve now got picture evidence that the overhyped Merkava needs one fucking grenade detonating on the turret roof(not inside) to brew up and take its crew with it…
*that’s less likely since at least 1/4th of Israel hails from the USSR, plus they already have the shining example of the blowback of the mujahideen (for Pakistan and the US) on why you don’t send heavy guns to unstable cunts
Plus Saudi is Russia-aligned, and trying to work with Netanyahu to get their favoUrite dictator back in Murrikan power.
It would be fun to be an arms dealer in another life. Bet they have some excellent stories.
Again, no. The Saudis are neutral – for stuff they’re interested in, they deal with the Russians (ie making money off the EU’s moronic policies, or the G7’s oil price cap, trying to stop the infighting in the Arab world), for other stuff they deal with the US.
As for… their favourite dictator? Can you elaborate on that, ’cause I’m nowhere near drunk enough to decypher that one.
Trump. The Saudis like his corruption, the Russians get to eliminate Ukraine from the map (and NATO in general)
Ah, that’s why I didn’t get it at first. You’re working under the false assumption that there’s any distinction between the two parties’ presidents outside of the US. If anything, Biden’s actually the more liked of the two from what I could gather from talking to Russians, since the general consensus on hin appears to be that he’s your combo Yeltsin and Gorbachov and that the longer he’s in power the worse you’ll all be in the long run…. 😉
If I were them, I’d pray for a repeat of the 2000 election, since with a nudge or two in the right direction… 😉
Look, I barely lived through 2000 as a young man, no way would I survive a damned repeat. ESPECIALLY if North Cakalaky was the tied/decisive state (as it could plausibly be).
You’re still a young man now.. Yer just a young man with plenty of experience in that position 😀
I’mma steal that line!
With the ladies, you can use the the related – you’re not old, you’re just a really experienced 29
Also, I don’t do freelance work. It’s either boring tech and customer relations for my corporate overlords and the rest is strictly for flag and country (’cause it sure ain’t for the pay) and thankfully mostly inside air-conditioned conference rooms. Admittedly, I prefer the clusterfuck that was the pullout to those, but I’ve been told that I’m a tad odd at times
Jeez.
I have no use for Man U, but that was really something.
Whoopsie Doodles!
That’s why you play to the final whistle.. or until no one is left able to move on the other side (also known as my strategy on playing FIFA98 without bookings 😀 )
Doo Doo group indeed.
Welp.
That’s offside by 3′ for Christ’s sake.
so offside even American audiences can tell
I’m hungry now
Dude
Maupay’s a cheap little shit, but that was a hell of a shot.
Not at all Disappointing Everton?
#DoucheStrong
That there is a beating.
Fun fact, my kids went to high school with one of the DEs from Oklahoma, Rondell Boothroyd. He’s one of the absolute nicest people (off the field, I assume), you’d want to meet. On his senior day in basketball he insisted the coach bench him at the start so that one of the senior bench players could get a start.
He started out at Wake Forest before transferring to Oklahoma. I believe he did quite well thanks to NIL with the transfer and good for him. Kid deserves it.
Yesssssssssssssssssss
Watering the garden (breaking heat record this weekend), smoking a joint, coffee steaming, dressed in my Moroccan garb. Ultra con neighboUrs CAME OUT! I wave from across of the street and said Top O’ the morning. Felt good.
/should have said allahu akbar now that I rethink it.
I don’t know, man, with what is currently happening in Gaza now is probably not the time.
Shit, I just read the news! I worked both jobs yesterday.
I only just saw myself. It’s bad.
THESE GUYS GEORGIA’S RUGBY TEAM I CALL THEM THE NORD STREAM PIPELINE BECAUSE THEY HAVE RUN OUT OF GAS.
Ambulance on to the field in West London. Team Knifey guy has a head injury.
THESE GUYS GEORGIA’S RUGBY TEAM I CALL THEM GRANDMA AND GRANDPA MANNING AT CHRISTMAS BECAUSE THEY HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO BE HUGE SPOILERS.
/not really, Wales has already clinched its knockout round spot, but Georgia is really outdoing themselves here.
//and of course Wales scores a try while I am typing this up.
Is there time wasting in rugby? Because it would be fun to accuse the Georgians of…Stalin
High end Dad joke here.
In the XXth Centurieee!
Not really. You can’t really run/pass around in circles like you can in fútbol, and if you try to waste a bunch of time getting the ball out of a ruck the ref will yell at you to “use it!” and eventually just take it away.
Apologies in advance to yeah right for this dreadful match.
I should be the one apologizing.
oh snap, Slabhead is playing. Somebody check on Wakey!
Currently cut off from the developed world glamping with Wifey for her birthday. Her natural habitat is the boutiques. In our 41 years married we have never camped, I knew better. This is jagged edge for her. Thank God she has a fuckin painting class at 5. And double thank God the pool is still open for me. I could use thoughts and prayers.
Some of those Glamps use only 300 thread count sheets; pray for 2Pack
Pioneer Chick here had me removing stink bugs individually, above 20 of them, for our first hour here. The struggle is real people.
We used to have problems with geckos. They are cute and fun and harmless until they start pooping on people. Which they do. A lot.
u nevar c that n GEICO ads smgdh
Oh, you do in the ones on German TV.
Prolly the last outdoor pool for this year.
Little leaves and no kids. Paradiso!
My wife’s idea of camping is a 4 star hotel
Bragging or complaining? ’cause if it’s the latter – you should bless your lucky stars, damn it. Mine’s idea of a relaxing camping is basically a field exercise, only with worse packed food and no meat wagon to cart you back to base if you twist your ankle 😀
I guess bragging as she hates the outdoors. Not sure she’d even do a high end glamping thing
That looks awesome!
Good morning early riser gang. Mrs. Cola is taking wee man out of town for Canuck Thanksgiving which means solo long weekend. Just rolled one and plan to burn it on my front step while wearing my Moroccan jelaba to freak out the ultra conservative family across the street.
Goodness, can some real countries go to war to please? I still don’t understand why the US cares about Israel/Palestine. Maybe if the Israelis weren’t such prick neighbors everyone wouldn’t want to kill them.
Unless my gas is going up a nickle. Then we do need to go Oppenheim over there.
I like that you internalized the “telling not spelling” subtext of my post this week.
“UDOGIE” sounds like that exclamation of wonder Jed Clampett used on The Beverly Hillbillies
Due to my use of high quality opiates, I’m usually the first up for fellow-traveller Hippo’s wonderful Saturday morning posts, even though I mostly hallucinate them.
#MeToo
BOOOOOOOOOO!!