Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Deadline Updates

First off, thank you all again for all your support and well-wishes last week. I’m glad to say new car has been acquired. It is quite red, so fingers crossed that it stays okay. I’ll need many years, at the least to help offset the fact that cars are expensive.

It’s the news! So, who got traded?

-As mentioned yesterday, CB Donovan Peoples-Jones goes from CLE to DET (for a 2025 6th).
-CB Rasul Douglas: GB to BUF (for a 3rd & 5th).
-QB Joshua Dobbs: ARI to MIN (and a conditional 7th for a 6th).
-One of the bigger surprises, DE Chase Young: WAS to SF (for a 3rd).
-That was in addition to DE Montez Sweat went from WAS to CHI for a 2nd.

Then, we got some coaching updates:

-More fun in Bearsland, as now RB coach David Walker’s been booted for another HR behavioral thing.
-Meanwhile, of course, in the middle of the night,

“HI I’M MARK DAVIS AND YOU DON’T COACH FOR THE RAIDERS ANYMORE!”

HC Josh McDaniels, GM Dave Ziegler, and OC Mick Lombardi are all fired.

In non-trades and fires news:

-A Texas judge dismissed a defamation suit by a woman who claims she was Jerry Jones’s daughter that alleged there was a plan to portray the woman as “an ‘extortionist’ and a ‘shakedown artist.'”

And what about sports?
Baseball’s almost over?
HUNK OF METAL ON THE PREMISES: World Series Game 5
Pull the Lever, Kronk! vs. Deadly Viper Assassination Squad (TEX vs. AZ, Rangers lead 3-1) (8:03, Fox)

Iceball
Sword Team vs. GRITTY (BUF vs. PHI, 7:00, TNT)
32nd Notes vs. Cale and Friends (STL vs. COL, 9:30, TNT)

No One Cares Yet About Basketball
Leicester Alliance vs. Triassic Park (MIL vs. TOR, 7:00, TSN Canadia special!)
Is Zion Healthy Yet? vs. Still Should Be the SuperSonics (NO vs. OKC, 7:30, ESPN)
Battle LA Part 1, now with James Harden! (LAC vs. LAL, 10:00, ESPN)

Playoff Lesser Amerifooty
Crack That Whip! vs. ATL UTD (Columbus vs. Atlanta, 7:30, FS1)

And now, talking amongst friends!

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Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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yeah right

Alright. Let’s do Vegas.

You all ready for this?

ArmedandHammered

Yep.

2Pack

You’all stay safe there now… Ya hear.
Naked theft of a LEO’s vehicle, with the accompanying azz woopin, has been dun recently so that’s off the board.
Let’s see yer style points.

Brick Meathook

The reason the local people in the Nation’s Capital hate Dallas so much is not just the Cowboys, it’s that they stole the Senators baseball team. Also they murdered Jack Kennedy.

Horatio Cornblower

I don’t really mind that the Rangers won the World Series, but I’m fucking ecstatic that Houston didn’t.

SonOfSpam

Look, any Texas thing is bad, but certainly the Rangers are the less-bad baseball option.

TheRevanchist

Just happy the Dodgers sucked so bad they couldn’t even make it there.

Gumbygirl

Hey, I meant to tell you earlier that your metaphor about the dog with rabies and the Arkansas shack child made me squeal with delight. Like a pig I was. Squealing!

SonOfSpam

I don’t think there are actually any Texas Rangers fans.

But whatevs, congrats.

Horatio Cornblower

I was just rooting for both teams to have fun.

SonOfSpam

Yankees fans are well-known for being magnanimous.

Horatio Cornblower

We’re good people if you ignore pretty much everything we think, say, or do.

WCS

An old roommate loves them. He’s a loveable dipshit from Arlington, so I’m happy for him.

SonOfSpam

Hey, good enough. Celebrating a championship is something every sports fan should do at least once.

Gumbygirl

The Bushbaby.

Mr. Ayo

Mission Accomplished!

Doktor Zymm

Someone in my apartment complex has one of those electric cars that makes that infuriating humming noise. They’re absolutely going to play that noise non-stop during the next Waco

WCS

/Manuel Noriega would shudder, but he’s dead.

Brick Meathook

Two days after Hondo dies, the Washington Senators win the World Series.

WCS

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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WCS

A Dallas franchise I couldn’t care less about winning a CHAM-PEEN-CHIP is fine.

Just knowing Jerrah won’t live this down is forever a joy in and of itself.

Horatio Cornblower

Bruce Bochy, who seems like a genuinely good guy, gets talked out of retirement and takes the Rangers to the World Series.

Meanwhile, Hal Steinbrenner keeps Aaron Boone on the payroll.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Anybody got any good mystery recommendations for me to read on my trip to New Zealand?

Doktor Zymm

Specifically New Zealand mysteries, or will any good mystery do?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, anything will do. I’ve got Ancillary Justice that you mentioned elsewhere but I figure I should have something else in case I get all bi-mon-sci-fi-con-ned out.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m downloading some Martha Wells stuff too. I really should have had MURDERBOT drop by Request Line sometime.

BugEyedBoo

Murderbot was okay. Adrian Tchaikovsky’s Final Architecture series is good. Nonfiction, I recommend The Dawn of Everything.

Doktor Zymm

Have you read any Ovida Yu?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, but it doesn’t look like there’s any torrents of her stuff available.

Horatio Cornblower

The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ooh, neat. I’ll give it a whirl! Thanks.

SonOfSpam

The sequel is also good: The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle and McCormick

Gumbygirl

And Schmick.

Brick Meathook

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jjfozz

Do women instinctively know how to nag, or do they learn that from their mothers? Or is it some secret class they take in grade school?

Doktor Zymm

Current theory about the Bears giving up a 2nd rounder for Montez Sweat: They’re so pissed off about losing to the Packers in week 1 in a year where the Packers suck that they’re willing to do almost anything to ensure victory in Green Bay during the meaningless week 18 game

Horatio Cornblower

There has to be some side deal where they know he’s going to sign with the Bears, r…Oh wait, right, it’s the Bears. There isn’t, and your idea make much more sense.

Doktor Zymm

Bears aren’t great with things like money and contracts
We Bare Bears in Money – YouTube

WCS

THOSE PECKERFUCKS ACROSS THE STREET CAN GET A CHAMPEENCHIP BUT NAWT MY GODDAMN STARS WHAT THE FLYING MONKEY FUCK IS THIS FUCKING SHIT GET THAT TUB-O-LARD DUMBASS MCCARTHY IN HERE SO I CAN CUT SOME BACON OFF HIS BACK AND GET THE BLOW AND HOORS THE OL DOUBLE J PISSED THE FUCK OFF TONIGHT YYYEEEEHHHHHAAAAAWWWWW SOMEONE’S GONNA DIE CUZ I’M PISSED THE FUCK OFF AND FUCKING CRAZY YYYYEEEEEEEHHHHAAAWWWWWW

Brocky

So bobby knight died on the 24th anniversary of Walter payton’s death.

Do with this info what you wish

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SonOfSpam

Proves that great men and shitty men can die on November 1st?

To be clear, Payton was a great man.

Horatio Cornblower

Trust me, I wasn’t confused.

Brocky

Eh, Walter cheated on his wife, while Knight is one of the few great coaches to never had a major rules scandal during his tenure. He gave the press the shit they deserve.

I’m not saying he doesn’t deserve criticism but to me it me that the most vocal critics of him tended to be fans of programs he made look bad.

flashes the double birds to the entirety of Purdue’s basketball program

Don T

Knight came to Puerto Rico in 1979 as a coach of the US team at the Pan American Games (Isiah Thomas at PG), Bobbeee was a thoroughly disrespectful and racist piece of shit. We haven’t forgotten. Fuck that fucking guy.

ArmedandHammered

My wife wondered if he threw chairs at Death to try and keep him away.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I know some HORRENDOUS stories of Bobby Knight’s racism. Fuck that guy sideways with a pineapple in hell.

Horatio Cornblower

Well, that’s because fans of Indiana would go to enormous lengths to excuse Knight’s atrocious behavior rather than join everyone else in criticizing him.

Redshirt

.

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litre_cola

If it is in that college town that burns couches it would be.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We had a make a webpage for a biology class I was in; one of the guys on the team included a picture of a couch on fire with the caption “burning couch provides valuable soil nutrients” along with an animated gif of Beavis.

WCS

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Downfield Matriculator

Maybe they are headed to East Lansing in time for basketball season

jjfozz

Two solid hours of my life wasted by meetings. What the Jesus-fuck did I just do?

Redshirt

Paying for several mistakes you made in your life?

litre_cola

Paid the bills for your family and can continue to regale us with stories of your kin. It is like I am looking in to the future.

jjfozz

My younger sister and I are not talking – which is fine with me. I will outlast her and win. No fucking doubt.

My older sister, milk toast that she is, is kowtowing to the youngest and is “going to meet with her and set things straight.” Fine, you’re an idiot.

I’m waiting for my mother to go passive aggressive on me and whine about how my younger sister is “so overwhelmed” and “tired.”

Hey ma, know what? Everyone is overwhelmed and tired, but I’m a stubborn asshole, which means in the end, I’ll win.

Or not talk to any of you fucking lunatics every again.

Don T

Congrats on the wheels, Señor. Red Steed? Code Red? Early Game Regular Season Andy Dalton? What are we naming this beautiful metal beast?

ballsofsteelandfury

Mountain Dew Code Red

King Hippo

speaking of, what’s the deal with that “Drinking Mountain Dew will turn you into a lizard person” ad?

ballsofsteelandfury

I haven’t seen that.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Of course a lizard person would claim ignorance.

Downfield Matriculator

Truth in advertising? Who but a lizard person would gargle that crap to begin with?

/takes deep pull from from can of dayglo Diet Mountain Dew to prevent full moon from revealing incipient lycanthropic tendencies

ballsofsteelandfury

Baja Blast For the win!!

Downfield Matriculator

Is that the cure for vampirism, zombification or something else you’re not telling us?

ballsofsteelandfury

Thirst mainly. But also yes.

Gumbygirl

I have to confess I have had more than one frozen Baja Blast at Taco Bell.

litre_cola

Balls has a VIP card. Or monthly membership for a taco a day if my memory is correct….

ballsofsteelandfury

This is correct. It’s the Taco Pass. Free Taco each day for a month for only $10!

Gumbygirl

There’s a Taco Bell about 5 blocks from me. I don’t need to know this! Today I cleaned the fuck out of my kitchen, and found wayyyy too many packets of TB hot sauce.

litre_cola

Balls once sent me over 100 packets of Tapatio. I am almost done, it was probably 4 years ago…

In fact, they moved to our new house with us.

ballsofsteelandfury

So what you are saying is you need refills?

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ballsofsteelandfury

You need to get the app. Crazy good deals there!

Gumbygirl

That’s exactly what my fat ass needs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Remember Bali Blast? They stopped making it after that bombing back in 2002.

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Horatio Cornblower

Damn terrorists! Ruining someone’s perfectly good marketing campaign like that.

WCS

Like when Lay’s had an incredible, potentially controversial, new chip flavor in 1991, but Dahmer went and ruined everything.

Gumbygirl

Doesn’t Taylor Swift have an album called Red?

Redshirt

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIFyjc3PbSU&pp=ygUVc2luZ2luZyBwaXJhbmhhIHBsYW50

Props to you, 2023: Piranha Plants singing a jovial tune wasn’t something I expected.

SonOfSpam

So Bobby Knight died.

Nice evening.

Don T

GOOD! I was seven when this happened (WaPo)
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SonOfSpam

Always a piece of shit. (did he at least bring paper towels?)

Gumbygirl

Whatta douche. Should be burning merrily in hell right now!

Redshirt

Somewhere in a retirement home, Rod Flanders looks up at his framed “I’m With Stupid” shirt with a wistful smile.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is this a rule of three thing? Dick Butkus (good), Bobby Knight (evil), so now we need a famous sports badman?

Brocky

My maternal grandfather was a fan of butkus, my paternal grandfather was a fan of knight,…. I gotta see if my dad was a fan of Matthew perry

Also we’re gonna call Bobby Knight evil when Calipari is still around?

Don T

evil and racist, sí. ¡Knight huelebicho!

Downfield Matriculator

He can go have a steak at Shula’s and maybe they can go take turns haunting Mercury Morris and Quinn Buckner

/why yes I am well into my late 50s and remember all of these gents with more facility that I can remember current NFL head coaches (at least I can now forget the name Josh McDaniel!)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Good Night, Sweet Knight.

Gumbygirl

I’ve been throwing chairs in his ( dis) honor.