Sexy Friday – 20231117

TGIF! May your wrist ligaments still be intact. As none of you will remember, I fractured and dislocated my CMC joint which is the joint that connects the base of your thumb with your wrist. You folks have no idea the misery and humiliation having to learn to wipe with your non dominant hand. Curse my apartment management for forcing me to remove my bidet. It was their asshat maintenance flunky that didn’t tighten the nuts when they replaced the plunger that caused that leak! I miss it so much. Anyway, best of luck Burrow.

Survival – Personal Edition

Alright Playboy aficionados, time for the article. This week we’re going to ram a barricade. To be clear, this is not about proper bollards. Don’t mess with them.

  • Identify the side of the barricade or gate that is locked. That’s the most vulnerable point of the barricade. If it’s a gate the opens from the middle, that’s your target zone.
  • If the barricade or gate is operated my a motor or magnet, your job is much easier. Your vehicle can easily overpower the motor or magnet that controls the gate. Just nudge into it and then slowly depress your accelerator to open.
  • Back to the locked barricades. Assuming you have a normal front engined vehicle, you’ll want to back into the barricade. If your vehicle is rear engined, it’s too valuable to damage and you obviously have another option, so use that. Anyway, the point is you don’t want to damage your engine, so use the other end of it.
  • Depending on the sturdiness of the barricade you’ll need between only 30-45 mph to be successful. Aim for the weak spot, accelerate to your estimated speed, and maintain that through contact with the barrier. Make sure to scout the area behind the barricade to know if you need to make any turns or slow down immediately after breaching the barricade.
  • Don’t forget to duck. A tall barricade can crash through the window and end your fun evening early.
  • Look, you made some estimates, and you tried. The good thing is you followed this guide, so your vehicle is still working. Back up and try again. You can do it, sport!

Now that you’ve penetrated the secured area, go do you. Remember you can always replace that vehicle anyway.

Click here to get to commenting

Survival – Species Edition

Time to put the sexy in Friday!

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!

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Mr. Ayo
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2Pack

Night court memories

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ballsofsteelandfury

Holy moly!

Doktor Zymm

It’s apparently not that easy to get a burger in SeaTac at 10 pm. Want some meat so going with a birria bowl from Qdoba. Birria is so damn good, even in fast food version

yeah right

Salute!

Decompressing as we speak.

Good week guys!

Let’s keep this season rolling!

SonOfSpam

Yeah that was a legit riot. As as white guy, I was…not in the area.

WCS

I was ten, and it was one of the first things I actively followed on the news. World Trade Center and Waco were probably next, in between The Simpsons and Nickelodeon most likely. Probably M*A*S*H* reruns, too.

SonOfSpam

You did the right thing (following the Simpsons)

I was 23 and it was surreal and weird and I was far enough removed to be glad I was far enough removed.

yeah right

I’m next door to the LBC and I had couriers delivering microfiche to a distribution center by City National Bank downtown LA behind 7th and Figueroa.
And shit got insane.

I was fine but this whole town was on fucking fire and pissed off.

SonOfSpam

My now-wife lived in Long Beach (borderline Lakewood) so she wasn’t close, but we watched the smoke from her apartment and dipped out to Vegas late Friday night. It was crazy and I can’t really find fault with anyone pissed off.

yeah right

Hell, I was pissed off.

SonOfSpam

Yeah, that was an education for me. As a stupid sheltered OC kid, I had no idea. And I learned.

Brick Meathook

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ballsofsteelandfury

I was at UCLA. We went to the beach.

ballsofsteelandfury

That was the day after. On the night of, I was on my way to the Hollywood Tropicana for oil wrestling. Unfortunately, it was closed. We came back through the valley where I hit a bicycle on the freeway and got a flat tire. Changed it on the offramp and eventually made it to my apartment near frat row.

yeah right

I remember that place
It was near the Capitol records building.

Last edited 11 months ago by yeah right
Brick Meathook

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SonOfSpam

Kinda looks like a post Buddy would enjoy.

King Hippo

Good think Deion kept his receipts, maybe he can get his moneys back.

WCS

This game is at halftime?!

yeah right

I have been listening to ska all night!

Orbits aligned.

SonOfSpam

Rank away my man

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Did that Vegas F1 race happen yet? Any dead?

SonOfSpam

Race is tomorrow night MIDNIGHT DFO time.

Aw yeah.

yeah right

I’mma record that shit.

WCS

SPOILER ALERT: Max Verstappen wins.

TheRevanchist

Apparently P3 means “practice 3”. That is all I learned from watching my cable guide like the old person I am.

SonOfSpam

I thought it was a Brett Favre optimistic thing.

King Hippo

Washington on Upset Alert? per FS1…except they are 2.5-point UNDERDOGS to Niiiiicccce Beaver

SonOfSpam

Yeah, I caught that too. Stupid non-gamblor people.

SonOfSpam

Having said that, I have no specific opinion on that game.

I THINK, gun to head, I take UW. But no confidence.

yeah right

I really like that Penix.

SonOfSpam

(Buddy signal activates)

SonOfSpam

Wazzu is puttin it to the Fightin Deions so far.

FRIDAY NIGHT ON THE PALOUSE IS LIT YALL but boy I’m glad I don’t live there

2Pack

I would be ready, and up for whatever, breach ops included, with bolt cutters in the trunk, and lady number 5 in the passenger seat. Nice as always Mr Ayo.

Brick Meathook

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SonOfSpam

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

My feet hurt

WCS

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Brocky

I get shin splints at my second job anymore.

This is how I know I’ve fully transitioned in to the role of an office worker

SonOfSpam

Yes, but it’s in service of boobs.

Doktor Zymm

Speaking of sexy Friday, this lady on my flight is impressively tits out. Wouldn’t expect that in Boise

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Shedaho

2Pack

Ask her to pose for us please. Say we’re a talent supply organization, not the perv’s we really are.

Brocky

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I got you

2Pack

Thoughts and prayers Buddy.

Brocky

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I gotcha.

Last edited 11 months ago by WCS
Brocky

And it’s a double post. The expletive is appropriate

Brocky

A farside comic, nice touch.

I own two farside shirts, one “how birds see the world” & “Midvale school for the gifted”

jjfozz

too many beers n bourble last night, 530 turned into 7 – high speed drag race to work in DC, I am fucking tired.

King Hippo

Hippo went a perfect 5-for-5 in taking midday naps this week, and is unreasonably proud (and ashamed) of hisself.

Brocky

I usually got a 1 to two hour break between shifts for my second job, I always put my feet up, but I never seem to fall asleep

King Hippo

Don’t worry, youing whippersnapper. You’ll get there!

Brocky

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Brocky

Evening all, every have one of those nights where you’re so disappointed with your takeout that you end up ordering from a different place? That’s me tonight

Spoiler

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ballsofsteelandfury

KATHY IRELAND!!

2Pack

Sweet.

Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brocky

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Game Time Decision

You can’t park there

Brocky

Don’t you tell me how to live my life!

WCS

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

ATTRACTIVE FEMALE DOCTOR: …okay, so no allergies. Are you sexually active?

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Who’s asking?

ATTRACTIVE FEMALE DOCTOR: No, I meant…

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Ha ha, just kidding. [pulls piece of paper out of pocket, unfolds] I sure am. Want to see last month’s stats?

ATTRACTIVE FEMALE DOCTOR: I’m just going to call in a chaperone for this next part…

ballsofsteelandfury

The ladies this week are like a baseball hitting lineup. The clean up spot is particularly good…

King Hippo

All about that leadoff gal, which I guess is on point for a #BFIB supporter.