Your Placeholder Thread. Now With Game Preview Goodness!

Hey squirrels and boys, this is here until I do all my homework and spill it on to the monitor. Why so late? Well, a business partner wants to live test a new operating system at 10am on a Sunday! Imagine that.

As you suspected, people suck. Update-People are still sucking.

To The Games!

Steelers/Browns:

Garbage-y qb play on both ends makes us look elsewhere. Perhaps we can watch the sack race between Garrett (11) and T.J. Watt(10.5) I guess watching DTR (Down To Run) scramble around for his football life might be entertaining. When is Vegas going to start giving us odds on concussed players?

Cards/Texans:

This is your sneaky good tilt of the early slate. Would anyone have said this even four games ago? Nope. But now Arizonny has Murray back and can put points on the board. And the Texans are beginning to fully understand just how potent their offense is. As with Denver, you can’t judge them by their season-long stats because they’re a different team heading down the stretch. You were very smart to pick up Noah Brown last week or the week before but now you can’t play him. Such is fantasy life.

Titans/Jags:

Such hope for these teams in September but the former has been sunk by shitty qb play and the latter just seems a bit off despite so many pieces in place.

Raiders/Fins:

Mark Davis will be safely esconced in his (pillow) Fort of Everybody Go Away! halfway through the second quarter. Achane is back and ready to roll over Vegas’ generous D. Will Tyreek go for 200? He’s got some work to do to get to 2,000 yards.

Cowboys/Panteros:

This line seems…odd. As I’ve noted before, Dallas really buries lousy teams. (the stumble vs the Cards excepted) DAK! and CeeDee should pad the stat line and while we’re at it, can I get some garbage fantasy points from Theilen in the 3rd and 4th? Carolina should try and pretend they’re going to make the score respectable, right?

Bears/Lions:

If Detroit gets the W they’ll have their best record since way back in ’62. Strawberry Fields’ thumb has been un-dislocated but can he throw a deep or non-wobbly ball? His running would be the key to an upset because the Lions had no answer for LAMAR! a few weeks back.

Chargers/Packers

Can Herbert just have a half-decent coach? Everyone acknowledges the man’s superior talent but his record is 29-29 to date. Jones and Dillon should have a day because the Lions ran for over 200 yards vs defensive coaching genius Staley.

Giants/Commies:

The Giants locker room must feel like a mausoleum at this point. They’ve had shitty years in the past but they’ve never jockeyed for the 1st overall pick since 1981. DeVito, who was shitty at SillyCuse and Illinois is the young boy that can take them to that promised land. And he’ll do it while throwing for less than 140 yards. GAH!

Do your thing.