Let’s do this!
Chiefs/Ravens:
-Difference-Maker?: MVS maybe? The Baltimore D can’t be had in too many places but pass plays outside the numbers is a bit of a weakness and for K.C. this is a strength-they averaged 7.4 yards per completion and connected at a 69.3% rate.
-Scrambled or Over-Easy?: Lamar! prefers scrambled, as he ran for 489 yards on non-designed runs. Given that the Chiefs blitzed the 4th-most times Jackson needs to get chunk plays with his legs when the pocket collapses.
-Scoring defense-wise these are the two best teams in the NFL-the Ravens allow only 16.5 points per game and the Chiefs are at 17.3. That said, I’d take the over of 44 given the talent of the opposing qb’s. When they’ve played each other the lowest total was 51.
-Baltimore is 10-3 ATS in their last 13 games.
-Bad News For Spags: Since he took over as Chiefs DC in 2019 his defenses have allowed the most qb rushing TD’s.
-Kelce needs 6 catches to tie Jerry Rice for the most in the playoffs.
-As everyone expected, Kadarius Toney is a no-show for the game. Whatever, it’s only a conference championship. I feel sorry for his new baby girl, knowing how often he’s going to drop her.
-Taylor Swift is 8-3 when attending games.
-Injuries: Joe Thuney is out, Marlon Humphrey, Mark Andrews and Pacheco are in.
-Pacheco is key in that when K.C’s rushing number passes the 100 yard threshold they are 7-2. When they fail to reach it they fall to 6-4. As individual players go, the Ravens have only allowed 100+ yards to Zach Moss and Jerome Ford.
Enjoy the tilt.
If you’re gonna get a roughing the passer penalty at least make it count
Man, if Kelce’s gonna take cheap shots and then laugh at you when the refs get you for retaliating you may as well just start going for his knees.
And as I type that one of the Ravens tries to behead Mahomes.
Holee shit, clothesline!
There u go
DirtyBirds not doung themselves any favors here
fozz is gon kill someone
someoneA ton of people.**it’s Baltimore so it’s only 5 people
If I was at the game I’m pretty sure I would be screaming encouragement. Just seems like that kinda day, ya know?
bah gawd thats a 30 yard penalty no matter whos qb
at least he got his money’s worth there
Hamilton not throwing away his shot!
Baltimore losing their composure.
Oh that is some dumb shit
Baltimore is starting to fall apart at the seams.
I’d ask if you meant the team or the city, but I’ve seen The Wire.
Bailout flag is bailout
way to go dude
Bit of a lag on that call, no?
They had to pretend to be looking the other way until a Raven did something
KC thanks BAL for throwing the ball twice and allowing them to keep their timeouts on that last drive. If KC scores twice on consecutive drives, this game will be over, and I know who BAL will be firing this off-season.
barring a little bit of ’92 oilers collapse, if kc scores a td here games over
Kansas City is 100% scoring before the half.
If the game comes down to Lamar throwing a touch pass, I’d put all my moneys on KC.
He has gotten a lot better at it this year though. He’s actually transitioning off of just being a “running QB” successfully, which I don’t think has been done before
I agree but if the pressure is on, I’m betting that he’s going to revert.
True, it’s probably hasn’t fully steeped in yet. But in another couple years, barring extreme setbacks, I think he’ll be in the all-time conversation. (side note, I refuse to use the term GOAT because I think it’s a stupid and horrible acronym)
It originally applied to Earl Manigault and was then bastardized and continues to be to this day.
BAL should totally go for it here.
Right?? I was watching really close in case it was a fake punt and then it wasn’t and I was sad.
They need a spark and they 100% needed their last drive to finish the half.
That Bob Marley movie is gonna be total dogshit, ain’t it?
Considering most biopics of shitty people omit their shittiness,
Probably
I’ll judge it by how many and which groups it pisses off
You probably already have a good idea who that will be.
THIS RAVENS DEFENSE I CALL THEM THE 2016 TONY AWARDS BECAUSE HAMILTON IS DOMINATING
Aaron B. has left the chat
Ravens punted at the 32, got the ball back on the 41.
Thats the field position game my friends
Taylor’s bangs getting curly on the BAL humidity. I love NFL extreme weather games.
It is extremely NICE in Santa Clara today, which should be more fun for the people at the game than the rest of us
Shocked they didn’t call a BS roughing the passer penalty there
Oh, it’s too early for that. Gotta save it for a really key drive late in the game.
Did you not get the script re-writes?
Favorite thin slice: Neapolitan-style
Favorite thick slice: Detroit-style
Worst slice: Anything with sugar in the tomato sauce, blech
Detroit style pizza is def having a renaissance. There are like three legitimately good Detroit style pizza places in DC now.
I’m not watching in real time, only the updates,
Judging by the comments, Lamar passing to himself is NOT a typo
Yeah, def check out that highlight, it’s worth it
Mark Andrews is pissed that Lamar has more receiving yards than him.
also that both his legs work
As someone who picked Andrews over Kelce for a fantasy pool this week, ME TOO!
Is the highest possible fantasy score from a single play having a QB throw a 99-yard TD to himself?
I was told there’d be no math.
I described this in one of my posts one time.
I got told to stop making up scenarios
Your conversations with the Lord are your business.
Maestro needs to explain HOW THE FUCK a Caesar salad is a sandwich…
There’s lettuce between croutons, too easy
I laughed far too loud at this
Zymm nails it, as per usual.
That’s what having your doktorate does.
Croutons?
i did that once in a recess playground game. threw the ball, deflected, caught it, but unlike lamar i ran it for a td
scrub.
I remember limaging that happening against me in fantasy football
It doesn’t count if you didn’t yell “AND 1!” during the run, that’s just rules of the yard.
That would count double in fantasy, right?
It should.
Yep.
I looked it up once.
Because I so much time on my hands
LAMAR!
NEAT
Lamar Jackson is a cheat code.
He didn’t go to North Carolina.
Louisville doesn’t bother to pretend their players have ever gone to a class.
(Billy Idol voice) PASSING TO MYSELF
THis is very good.
See, Gisele, LAMAR! can throw the ball and catch the ball!
Also, doesn’t tongue-kiss his progeny
And that’s why any teammate is happy to go to war for Lamar!
Mariota didi it first against KC. It killed Revis’s career too 😵💫
BANANACAKES!
Yeah. Wow.
Afternoon! I’ve been cooking all day to hang with decent folks with cable. And therefore, fucking CBS. Highlights: an ad for Paramount plus received legally. And the game. Bof.if
Kevin Hart was funny in the original Friday. He’s like 0 for his last 300. Maybe stop putting him on the teevee.
How many pills have you taken?
Kevin Hart was never in Friday
In North Carolina, it’s still okay to say they all look alike.
way to activate my WHITE LIBERAL GUILT all the way to 100 smh
We all have our special talents.
🤣
he wasn’t the “you got KNOCKED THA FUCK OUT?” guy? Than how did he even get famous??
urite, I do need MOAR PILLZ
That was Chris Tucker
OY
https://www.tiktok.com/@cat_cosplay_inc/video/7321847164471119147
chris tucker
you prob got knocked the fuck out once and werent put in protocol
Excuse me, excuse me. Back spasms.
In my defense, I only saw Friday the once. But in a theatre, where by platonic friend Kasia and I were the only White Devils. It was a great time.
0 for 301, he wasnt in friday?
Counterpoint: Kevin Hart has never been funny
He’s one of those stupid yellers like Sam Kinison and Lewis Black, can’t stand that approach to standup.
Pretty sure Kevin hart was a teenager when Friday came out
Jim Mora isn’t dead yet?
Way to put your bollocks on the table, Ratbirds! Now…fucking STRIKE.
Take the points on all turnovers. Make each one hurt.
example #376 of “take the points, you meatheaded football coaches”
perhaps we shoulda taken balmore’s loss to the clots at home more seriously
Perhaps. That one was a head-scratcher for sure.
Every AFC North team is due for one or two egg layings a year.
If KC gets up by two scores, Gregg Easterbook might start writing “game over” in his notebook.
Is that fucking guy still alive?
The Lions better win because I can’t root for the 49ers!
Not with that attitude.
I was looking for the game on the radio in the car, but all the local stations decided to talk about the Niners game for 3.5 hours instead of airing the AFC game. Ended up on the ESPN AM station, which doesn’t do traditional play-by-play, but instead gives game updates and analysis while also going off on totally random tangents like who they think some guy in the crowd wearing a Derrick Henry jersey is rooting for. I especially liked the carb-heavy comment about how the Ravens are going “back to bread and potatoes” after converting the 4th and 1.
These are a couple guys I used to watch football with every Sunday, and yes we did go out to Elks parking lot at halftime of the 1:00 slate to toss around the old wobbler. I don’t see these guys at all anymore but we check in like this occasionally. We didn’t talk like this back in the 1990s. Apparently these guys do now. I’m getting weary of this kind of shit, you know?
To be fair, “The Moistening of Taylor” is her next album title
[Alex scribbles notes]
Incel culture is fucking incredibly effective at normalizing violence against women. We’ve maddeningly regressed as a society.
We should all go outside and toss the old wobbler!
Old wobbler sez, ” Don’t toss me, bro!”