Saturday Night Off-season Open Thread 21: Watch AFL!

old guy meme.jpg

Seriously, if you’re upset about the lack of sports this time of year, you absolutely need to be watching the AFL and the CFL. There’s no excuse.

Today’s topic is “shit we had/did when I was growing up that kids today will never have.”

People today see that picture and think, “why hasn’t the city fixed that???” I look at it and think, “where’s my bike?” If I couldn’t get air over that vault, I’d consider myself a failure.

If you had balls, you would attempt a flip. If you had stones, you would attempt a BACK flip.

Short shorts, tube socks, and half shirts. I used to ROCK a Semi-Tough half shirt!

***

Golf Update

My local club has a summer-long single elimination Match Play tournament. My first match was on Thursday afternoon. I took the afternoon off work and so did my opponent.

The match was scheduled for 9 holes with handicaps being utilized. Since I’m a 30 and opponent is a 26, I got a stroke advantage on three holes.

On the Par 4 first hole, we both got off to a rough start with 7s. However, this was one of the holes I got an advantage on, so I won the hole. I got a par on the second, third, and fourth holes, so I beat my opponent straight up on those holes.

I was 4 up going into the Par 3 Fifth. My opponent got a 4 and I had a five foot putt to tie him, but I missed it and he clawed one back. Then, in the Par 5 Sixth, I hit a clean drive, a brilliant second shot, and got on the fringe in three. He finished with a seven and I tapped in for a 6 and the win.

I will find out next week who my new opponent is. I’ll keep you posted on how I do.

***

Politics Politics Politics Politics

As one of our brilliant commentists, fleshwound_NPG, put it perfectly: Biden is about to get Khrushchev’ed. It’s just a matter of when, not if.

On the other side, Trump apparently embarrassed himself further (as if that was actually possible) during his rambling speech at the RNC. It is clear neither of these two should be president.

If Biden steps away, as is widely expected, who will take over on the Democratic side? I say anyone but Kamala. My personal thought is that the Governor of Michigan has the best shot at winning. What say you?

***

Today, some of the SoCal DFO crew got together for some AM drinking at Joe Jost in Long Beach.

I met up with the illustrious Brick Meathook and the equally talented (though in different fields) Yeah Right. A good time was had and multiple schooners of beer, root beer (on tap!), bags of home-roasted peanuts, and Joe’s Specials were consumed.

I really liked the place. I commented to the boys that it was a lot of people OUR age. Yeah Right added that they were all OUR skin color too, which was interesting. There was lots of Milfy goodness around, which made for nice scenery. We’ll have to go back…

Please note there are no Arsenal flags…

***

As a quick reminder, the full Summer of Soccer schedule is below. The Olympics start soon!

***

Your weekly Psych gif:

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Your weekly hot girl pic:

Marika-Fruscio-17.jpg

***

Your weekly music video:

***

One last thing:

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Brick Meathook

When the current Smithsonian National Air & Space Museum on the National Mall opened in 1976, the Apollo 11 command module was the centerpiece in the main area as you entered. It was encased in form-fitting plexiglass shell for protection, because you could get right up to it and peer inside through the open hatchway.

Two years ago I went to the large NASM Udder-hazy annex near Dulles Airport (I go there frequently when I’m back east) and this was while the Mall museum was undergoing extensive repairs and reconstruction.

What did I find just sitting on the main floor at Udder-Hazy, protected only by temporary barriers and the watchful eye of a security guard? The Apollo 11 command module, arguably one of the most historic flying vehicles ever, just sitting there on a roller carriage:

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Brick Meathook

>Udvar-Hazy annex< fuckin spellcheck

blaxabbath

Means it hasn’t gotten stolen yet.

Give it four years..

Brick Meathook

It was only sitting there that one visit. It was gone the next time I was there, and is probably back down in the museum on The Mall. On my previous visit to Udvar-Hazy Chuck Yeager’s Bell X-1 (that broke the sound barrier) was sitting there in the exact same spot, also just with portable barriers. That aircraft is also normally displayed on The Mall museum, so I guess they were rotating them while the main Mall museum was being reconstructed.

https://ibb.co/PMQ5Rch

Brick Meathook
Doktor Zymm

Where is our house?
Which way should I walk?
What should I sip while rollin’ down the street?
Can I dance if I want to?

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WCS

What is that beautiful house?

Where does that highway go to?

Am I right, or am I wrong?

My God, what have I done?

Dunstan

Who is responsible for these canines running around the yard?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

WHO? WHO? WHO?

Brick Meathook

Where does that stairway go?

WCS

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

What quantity of love is there?
What shouldn’t we chase?
How many single ladies?

Horatio Cornblower

The Nazi Punks, what should they do?

What shall we do with the landlord? The poor?

Where shall we holiday?

blaxabbath

WHOM spoke in class today?

Brick Meathook

Speaking of things kids today will never have, here are “monkey bars” that were a playground staple. And yes you could (and kids did) fall off these things and get hurt pretty badly. All our playground gear was designed to toughen us up and weed out the weaklings.

https://ibb.co/d5WwHvL

Doktor Zymm

My favorite were the merry-go-round things that you could get going really fast and then you had to hold on to avoid flying off

Horatio Cornblower

My brother and I once leaped off the carousel at Lake Compounce, (Bristol, CT), pre-current version and both, somehow, executed perfect drop-and-roll landings while parents gasped in horror. I think we were 13 and 11.

WCS

We would see who could spin the longest solo without throwing up.

SMRT!

Brick Meathook

Hah! I just posted that!

Doktor Zymm

Yes! Those were the best!

Brick Meathook

This little fellow was absolutely demonic. It was spun by hand, and it could reach some substantial RPMs. The way it usually worked was the younger kids (age 8-11) would get on it and brace themselves, while 3 or 4 older kids (age 11-14) would stand around it and spin that fucking thing like “Wheel of Fortune,” except this could reach speeds of probably 100 RPM. If you were a younger kid you better try to stay near the center because if you started moving towards the outer edge there was no way you were holding on and you would be flung off that thing and land ten feet away.

I have no idea why they got rid of these things.

https://ibb.co/Kh6FbHM

Brick Meathook

This is gym class at my old elementary school:

https://ibb.co/vkHpfR7

(actually it’s WWI Army training)

WCS

Great timing catching the kid on the left’s imminent concussion and broken clavicle.

Horatio Cornblower

Fuck that, he died on impact and was buried right there.

They moved the equipment 5′ to the right out of respect.

Dunstan

Notorious rapist Bill Cosby had a pretty good routine about how childhood playgrounds were designed to kill children.

Dunstan

Taking a date to a food and wine event tomorrow. This is an important test for her. If she can’t handle me at my gluttinous best, then she doesn’t deserve me.

Horatio Cornblower

Pax vobiscum, my friend.

Brick Meathook

Holy shit, speaking of July 20, 2024, this was 55 years ago today:

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LemonJello

That looks like it was filmed on a Hollywood soundstage only yesterday!

Horatio Cornblower

Another tune that should have made a band famous and rich.

But sure, fuck it, Winger rules!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1l50slBaGg

Brick Meathook

Old white people at Joe Jost’s. Long Beach CA
7/20/24

https://ibb.co/Qfg1wmv

Brick Meathook

This is only half the place (and a third of the crowd). It was pretty packed, but it seemed like half of them were Jost family members attending a reunion celebrating the bar’s 100th anniversary.

Horatio Cornblower

Whole lotta skipped Leg Days there.

Brick Meathook

They were all in the back . . .

Doktor Zymm

I’m ashamed to admit I kind of want this purse that looks like a cat being strangled

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Temu got me with a Duolingo ad today, I was like “actually, I really *would* find that ‘free gift’ rather useful…”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Was it a butt plug?

Horatio Cornblower

Get real, BFC, it was a vacuum.

2Pack

Great topic Buddy. Allows me to get out there on the front lawn and hollar at the world some.

Simple interaction without technology. Only thing you may have gotten was a landline phone number, that could only be used sparingly. Funny but I was thinking the other day, after seeing an old picture, of a girl I got chased away from by her Dad who answered the phone and was pissed off at me for calling after eight in the evening I think it was.

You normally made plans face to face. I saw something on a friend’s feed that illustrated it perfectly. If the movie The Breakfast Club were made today, it would be a silent film about five kids looking at thier phones.

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Horatio Cornblower

I essentially married the girl in the middle.

2Pack

Lucky you

Horatio Cornblower

You have no idea.

Dunstan

I’m not saying you’re wrong, but I have very clear memories of my parents’ generation being exasperated at us for talking on the phone, playing video games, and watching tv .. oh wait, I’m sorry, “the idiot box.”

Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty-five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.

— Douglas Adams

Dunstan

Oh sure. And there was a gender difference too, I noted. When I talked to girls, they would be happy talking for hours. (And who can blame them, I am witty and delightful.) But with my guy friends, it’s all business — what are we doing, where are we going, who’s getting the booze?

2Pack

In the 70’s if you talked longer than a set time they started charging you more. I remember the constant instructions from Dad to keep it short.

WCS
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Anyone else watching psych and making cocktails or just me?

Mr. Ayo

I’m definitely not doing one of those things and drinking one of those other things.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We’re watching Star Trek: Discovery and complaining about the fact that Michael Burnham CANNOT FOLLOW A FUCKING ORDER TO SAVE HER GODDAMNED LIFE IS STARFLEET A MILITARY OPERATION OR NOT I MEAN OBVIOUSLY NOT BECAUSE AFTER THE *FIRST* TIME SHE CAUSED AN INTERSTELLAR WAR HOW ON EARTH WOULD SHE EVER BE DOING ANYTHING OTHER THAN CLEANING TOILETS AND MEASURING RADIOACTIVE LEVELS AFTER A CORE LEAK?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[take a few deep breaths]

So what kind of cocktail should I make for the Dr. Mrs.?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Any inspiration? I made a Board Shorts yesterday for the first time, it was fantastic.

Just tried to make a Fox River for the first time and it’s meh

Mr. Ayo

Surely the Malort Margerita

Horatio Cornblower

I’ve recently heard some very good* things about a hot-dog-flavored Malort cocktail.

*horrible.

Doktor Zymm

That reminds me, I need to figure out how to watch more Lower Decks

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Same here, actually. It’s always hard to get the Dr. Mrs. to watch animated shows.

Doktor Zymm

Just tell her that you need to watch or the Moopsy will drink your bones

Moopsy!

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Dunstan

Yeah I gave up on that show early because I found that character inexplicable. Or more accurately, Starfleet’s treatment of that character.

Horatio Cornblower

I’m not watching Psych but I am drinking a 10.8% Snow sent me and likely to make some really bad decisions about the rest of the beer fridge very soon.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Like the old saying goes, 10 point 8, everything you do after that must be great

Horatio Cornblower

I feel like you just made that up.

/Pours a Green anyway.

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blaxabbath

What happened to that guy

2Pack

Working with the British Army introduced me to the solid attributes of Earl Grey tea with a dash of milk. That was the go juice for those blokes.

WCS

nein

Dunstan

More of a lapsang souchon guy myself, but Earl Grey ain’t bad

Horatio Cornblower

Door Flies Open: Come for the dick jokes, please stay afterwards for tea and crumpets.

WCS

He LOVES the cock.

WCS

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Horatio Cornblower

Last week I went up to Boston (OK, Somerville; apparently both towns feel like there’s a difference) (there is no difference), to see a punk band, The Taxpayers, doing a reunion tour. A few things:

Item the first: If it’s a reunion I expect to see a band that didn’t form when I was 38. That’s frankly hurtful.

Item the second: It was an all ages show. It would have been nice to have not been in the Top 5 of the oldest people there, but alas, twas not to be.

Item the third: This band is very much “all people/genders/identities are welcome” and I’m cool with that but people, when I walk in and am immediately the most masculine person in the entire room, even with my very recent pedicure and clear-coated toenails, we need to have a discussion.

Item the fourth: The Taxpayers do a sliding scale on merchandise, (very cool), asking people to pay what they can afford on posters, etc. I paid the max for a T-shirt and poster, because I remember my teenage punk years and what $50 would mean to a band like this. The kids at these shows may look at me as a middle-aged attorney sell-out but please keep in mind not only do we vote largely the same way, but politicians return my calls and I’m the reason the band you’re cheering on is going to have bread for their sandwiches tonight.

Item the fifth: When did kids stop showering? I get it, I’m old. I’m not sure when having a beard and nice tits became a thing, or being 6’0″ with broad shoulders and a stunning A-line black dress did the same, but I’m cool with it. What I’m not cool with is the entire room smelling like my high school locker room after gym class. Soap and hot water is not uncool you little shits, and the sooner you realize that the better for all of us.

Item the sixth: This song kicks all kinds of ass and deserve so much more attention than it gets. The Taxpayers were very hit or miss for me, (love their attitude, though), but they have 3-4 really good songs, and this one is just an absolute banger. They should get rich off this one, but won’t because some AI-generated piece of shit will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcDXpTa3g-U

Anyway, very long story longer, go give The Taxpayers money.

Mr. Ayo

This is some high quality ranting

Horatio Cornblower

I really just want people to give The Taxpayers money.

And for Gen Z, or whateverthefuck, to start bathing.

WCS

Okay, Boomer…

Actually, the odor thing is something I’ve noticed, too. I thought maybe it was just because the kids at Lil’ & Lil’er WCS’s school are kids, and kids are smelly and horrible things.

HOWEVAH, it’s not just stoopid kids. I work with a disturbing amount of people my age (42) or younger, and the younger ones definitely missed that speech from mom and dad about the benefits of hygiene and laundry.

Doktor Zymm

Could be they’re using that scammy ‘all-natural’ deodorant that does fuck all and is made from crystals or some shit

WCS

What’s interesting (perhaps that’s not that correct word, but I digress), is this is a newer thing. I never really noticed this when I was teaching. Sure, some students needed a change of undies or missed a shower or three, but those were the exceptions to the rules.

Maybe it’s a post-COVID thing? It took everyone under 40 sense of smell?

Doktor Zymm

Could be? Or they just forgot how going out and interacting with people is supposed to work?

Horatio Cornblower

Huge part of it. HUGE.

Which, to be fair

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is overall not limited to the younger set. Lack of hygiene might be their thing, but ever since Covid the ability to interact with people of what might be called “a civilized basis” has absolutely gone to shit.

Last edited 4 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
Dunstan

I think — and this is where I get into grumpy old man mode — that this is where the mostly-ok-though-I-have-reservations trend towards informality in clothes, etc. has gone too far.

Like, I know DFO is the land of no pants, but I roll my eyes at grown men who act like five year olds if they have to wear something other than jeans and a ratty t shirt. But fine, whatever. It’s the “and washing myself is bullshit too” attitude that is a bridge too far!

Horatio Cornblower

Wearing sweats and PJs while in the comfort of your own home whilst commenting on a dick-joke and football, (amongst many other things), is a God-given right just like being able to accumulate as many machine guns and cop-killing bullets as one might like, but motherfucker if you take that shit out into a grocery store or bank I will absolutely hit you as hard as I can in the back of the head.

blaxabbath

Just use hygiene to your advantage and continue to defeat them until they meet your standard.

Welcome to the jungle, kids.

Horatio Cornblower

It’s definitely a new thing. The guy I went with is a college professor.

Yes, that’s how old I am: my punk rock friend is a tenured professor at an accredited university.

Anyhoo, he says that not only is the gender-fluidity thing all over the place, (again, don’t care but you look stupid), but kids today, (removes crabgrass from lawn with tweezers, calls police because a kid with a tan pedaled past house on a Schwinn), simply aren’t as down with the hygiene as we were back in the early 90’s.

Brick Meathook

That’s because during their youth the monkey bars had been taken away and they were never properly seasoned.

2Pack

Yeah that stuff is worthless. Bring on the chemicals Baby.

Horatio Cornblower

I expect the Boomer thing because I showed up for the show in cargo shorts and a T-shirt from Key West, (fun fact, The Taxpayers had a Jimmy Buffet poster up for their whole show), but that odor transcends generations.

I don’t care how edgy you think you are, if you smell like you slept in your cat’s litter box no one is gonna take you seriously. Soap is cheap. 5 minutes of hot water will not break your budget. FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST USE BOTH!!!

Doktor Zymm

None of the other generations think enough about gen x to have opinions about them. And you can say Okay Boomer to people of any age when they are embodying the spirit of bitching about the times being achangin

2Pack

I consider hey Boomer a compliment.

Horatio Cornblower

I have had this discussion with my Millenial offspring on more than one occasion.

I am very clearly Gen X. Their Grandparents are Boomers. There is a difference.

2Pack

My boomer ass would punk them out proper too.

Horatio Cornblower

This was the same for me until my oldest hit a growth spurt and started doing jiu jitsu.

Now I’m just aiming for a retirement home with a nice view.

2Pack

They just don’t know the ego enhancing benefits of a “boy you smell good” comment from a lady.

Dunstan

“Gee, your hair smells terrific!”

2Pack

Thanks.

2Pack

So the show was some real funk… but it wasn’t a Funk band…

Horatio Cornblower

They’ve actually got a heavy New Orleans funk/jazz influence. They had a guy going bug-shit nuts on the trumpet and by Xenu it worked.

They’re a very interesting band. Not gonna say they’re my favorite but they’ll take chances, are very cool, and I respect the hell out of both.

yeah right

Redd Foxx said it best.

“Son. You’ve got to wash your ass.”

WCS

I thought things were a little more weird than usual to start tonight, then I remembered: full moon, Saturday night in July.

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Horatio Cornblower

Well that’s just, like, your opinion, man.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Should we all show up in Pittsburgh to make it better?

Horatio Cornblower

I don’t see any way this could go horribly wrong for the future of Pittsburgh or the Hapsburg empire.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I would think the most effective way to make Pittsburgh “better” would be to wall it off completely from modern society, and hurl our radioactive waste into the area using giant catapults.

WCS

Philadelphia is 250 miles east of here….

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Which means it’s better AND more easily accessible

Last edited 4 months ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Doktor Zymm

There’s no harm in eliminating everything in between though, except maybe the museum in Williamsport

Doktor Zymm

But Wilkes-Barre and their cutsey pronounciation can go to hell

Horatio Cornblower

This seems more like a “solution to Mississippi existing” problem.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Dunstan

There’s a really good live album of Tom Cochrane & Red Rider with the Edmonton Symphony Orchestra.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XH3Q_htgv0U

Dunstan

Went to Latin jazz night at the park nearby with friends, had lots of wine and charcuterie (which totally counts as dinner!). Feels like it’s whiskey o’ clock.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

For Dok, here’s another version of that video:

https://www.tiktok.com/@unemployedwineguy/video/7391163372529536287

Mr. Ayo

I mean he did use “organic” hot dogs. JFC

WCS

There’s a reason he’s “unemployed.”

Doktor Zymm

Wow, this is amazing. Is this guy actually affiliated with Malort? He seems like that kid in elementary school who would eat whatever gross crap people mixed together for extra pocket change

Horatio Cornblower

I mean, from what I understand, that’s probably how the CEO of Malort got his or her start.

Horatio Cornblower

This is outstanding.

Horatio Cornblower

This is actually a pretty good jiu jitsu exhibition.

Horatio Cornblower

I need to apologize to our wall-eyed fighter: just executed an outstanding transition from a rear-naked choke into an armbar to win by submission.

So much better than what happens 90% of the time, when two guys to the ground and try to wrestlefuck the other guy into submission out of sheer boredom.

Horatio Cornblower

There’s a woman about to fight on the UFC show who has one eye going in a different direction than her other eye and I have to believe getting hit in the head is not going to help that.

WCS

Actually, should that reinforce the idea that she’s already brain broke, and doesn’t process pain like regular people?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Horatio Cornblower

Oddly it was actually the other way around, with one eye centered and the other wandering to the outside.

WCS

Greetings.

Mr. Ayo

Sorry, wrong number.

Horatio Cornblower

This is 91…2.

WCS

822

Mr. Ayo

Guys, my number is 8675309. You just have to guess the area code.

Doktor Zymm

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t know why anyone would assume she was good-looking to begin with. It’s not like the writing on the bathroom wall said “for a pretty girl call…”

LemonJello

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Horatio Cornblower

I was just thinking the other day that I missed those ridiculous tube-top socks.

I do not, however, miss half shirts on dudes. And neither does anyone who saw me in one.

Horatio Cornblower

There aren’t any Arsenal flags at Sliante in Baltimore, either.

Anymore.

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll just Blair Witch myself, sorry BFC.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

It’s alright, great minds and all.

Doktor Zymm

Watching more Murdoch Mysteries. There was a corpse that turned up with a flask that had a secret compartment (containing evidence of course). I would totally like to own a vintage flask with a secret compartment, but attempting to search for such a thing on the internet has nawt been helpful. While some nice vintage flasks do appear, the bulk of the results are novelties like fake bibles with cutouts for a flask or binoculars that are actually flasks. So lame.

Doktor Zymm

Especially considering you can get a Bible for free from any cheap hotel and cut a hole into it yourself if you really wanted such a pointless thing

WCS

Or buy one from a certain Presidential candidate for the low, low price of $59.99, plus tax!

herodotus450

I love the episode where he makes Ted Turner have sex with a fat prostitute

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Q:When is a sandwich not a sandwich?

A: When it’s a taco

yeah right

Goddamn right.

blaxabbath

How do you feel about the fries?

Brick Meathook

No fries were had, as they are not on the menu. The pretzel sticks and peppers served as a bed for two hard boiled pickled eggs, one for yeah right and one for me. No fries though.

https://joejosts.com/menu/

Doktor Zymm

So apparently the CrowdStrike thing was a null pointer error. Total rookie mistake, really surprised it wasn’t caught in testing

BugEyedBoo

Not just rookies – I’m good for one every few years.

Mr. Ayo

It was caught in testing. Testing in production. And without a staged rollout. Totally normal.

Mr. Ayo

Gotta love those sponsors!

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Game Time Decision

I don’t always test, but when I do, it’s in production

Doktor Zymm

Test plan: YOLO

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

For the uninitiated, a null pointer error is when you set the encryption variable on the mainframe to a “null” value, which causes a power surge on the motherboard and leads to the familiar BSOD aka “blue screen of death”.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s dealt with, of course, by reversing the polarity, but that remedy must be applied manually which is why this was such a huge, huge deal.

LemonJello

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Horatio Cornblower

HEY, RTD’S EXPLANATION: ARE YOU ANOTHER ONE OF RIKKI’S FUCKING PUZZLES? BECAUSE I DON’T UNDERSTAND YOU, EITHER!

LemonJello

Maybe this short video will clear things up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW2LvQUcwqc

Horatio Cornblower

Look, if it involves sinosoidal deplaneration just say that in the first place.

Dunstan

It’s easy to do if you have a sonic screwdriver

Mr. Ayo

The Loved Two?

LemonJello

The Loved One-Two: the Janae Rice Story.

SonOfSpam

She would like to apologize for the sequel.

Doktor Zymm

Wow, how have I never heard of this? I gotta watch this now!

Brick Meathook

It’s a great movie! Liberace is perfect as the smug coffin salesman.

Brick Meathook
Game Time Decision

So, I live in a nicer area of my city, where the houses are stewpid expensive. My neighbour behind me is having a 50th birthday party for herself in her back yard. Is an total red neck event, both literally and figuratively. Lotsa sun burnt people there. And they have a mechanical bull and a DJ playing all the classic rock and country song you know but don’t have on a play list.
I’m hoping they run out of steam soon but expecting it to go until the wee hours of the morning. Thank BLEERGH for the windows cutting out most of the noise

SonOfSpam

Have they played Sweet Home Alabama and Friends in Low Places, and if so, which was first?

Game Time Decision

Prob sweet home Alabama, as I heard it when cooking

Horatio Cornblower

Sir, this house is a Garth Brooks Free Zone.

Doktor Zymm

It’s all fun and games until someone throws their back out on the mechanical bull, which should happen soon

Game Time Decision

Hopefully. No idea if a waiver is needed

Game Time Decision

Update
There’s now a shitty cover band playing.
It’s some how worse than you imagine

Doktor Zymm

When can you call the cops with a noise complaint?

Game Time Decision

Prob 11 but won’t bother WCS

Horatio Cornblower

It’s a Saturday for Christ’s sake.

Wait until 11:22.

yeah right

/Crosses off Canada as retirement destination.

litre_cola

Time for you to start banging some Skrillex from your backyard

Game Time Decision

Update 2

They are now doing drunken karaoke. Tis bad
And the volume has gone up.

Dunstan

“Drunken karaoke” — is there another kind? Not when I’m involved.

Doktor Zymm

Wander on over, blend in, try to find the fuse box and cut power to the whole property

Horatio Cornblower

Nothing a paper-boy with a good hook shot, a bicycle, and a flaming bottle of Malort won’t solve.

blaxabbath

2 inches……

blaxabbath

Perhaps some girl from California with a blog could move in to that property?

litre_cola

Oh boy.

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Doktor Zymm

Hah, what a bunch of idiots!

Doktor Zymm

Organized running and Malort, smh, two wrongs don’t make a right

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Have you seen the new Jeppsons social media ad campaigns? Holy hell are they leaning in.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C9f-VdMvBPN/?igsh=OGJjcndmazlueHRk

Doktor Zymm

Link broken?

I like this one, but it’s not from Jeppson
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Dunstan

Reminds me of the ads for Buckley’s cough syrup: “It tastes awful. And it works.”

Brick Meathook

I watched this. Am I to understand that Jeppsons is trying to get me to purchase this product?

LemonJello

Alert The Hague, a war crime is in progress.

yeah right

We met in the special writers room and were spitballing the idea of a hybrid crossover film.

Work with me here.

It’s a Mashup of Gone with the Wind and Anal Commando!

The title is still a work in progress but the idea is pure Hollywood gold!

Brick Meathook

Rhett doesn’t give a damn . . . because he’s driving!

Watch out Scarlet! Rhett is a Rectum Recker!

(cue Max Steiner overture)

RHETT: “All we have is cotton, slaves, and arrogance, but also hot anal sex!”

(cue Max Steiner porn music)

Melanie peers in through the door slightly ajar, watching the hot hot antebellum plantation anal sex. She licks her lips seductively and begins reaching through the 35 layers of her hoop skirt to begin pleasuring herself. Mammy is peering through the window, doing the exact same thing.

Doktor Zymm

Wind like farts it sounds like?

SonOfSpam

Gone With The Wind: Number Two
Scarlet O’Hara’s Deep South
Frankly, My Deaf, I Do Give a Ram

Horatio Cornblower

Boned In The Hind

Senor Weaselo

Anal Commando: “Let off some cream, Bennett.”

Horatio Cornblower

“I’ll be back…in your back end”

Senor Weaselo

Sir, that is the wrong Arnold movie! However…
“Sully, remember when I said I’d fill you last?”

“I lied.”

(Commando is hands-down my favorite Schwarzenegger movie.)

Last edited 4 months ago by Senor Weaselo
Horatio Cornblower

I did realize that, but felt that the joke needed to be made.

It is quite possible I was wrong about that.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

There are no arsenal flags….anymore

litre_cola

Jesus West Coast is bad

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s not who my team played.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

It was a mistake to stay up all night watching it but agreed!