Welcome back, dearest Premiership. Wake and bake, if you so choose, with Men Untied away to Sham Town (7:30, USA). Probably not much in this one. Mighty Whitey take on Fronk’s Hammers next in the 10:00 window, sadly it is Peacocked. TV option is Leicester/Palace, which makes no sense and holds no interest.
Sigh. Toffees in the Spotlight, away to Villa (12:30, NBC). Should be an easy win for the home side, but I guess one never knows. There’s also a bonus 3p Peacock match, Chelsea away to yeah right’s Cherries.
North London Derby alert! The King’s Afrikan Water Pistols steady their aim at the hated Hot Spurs on Sunday (9:00, USA). It’s on Tottenham’s patch, so should be competitive. You’ll want to flip over to Heroic RedZone Muzak after that, though.
Saturday’s JV slate is kind of “room temperature oatmeal” this week, but we’ll soldier on.
Alabama (-16) at Wisconsin (Noon, Fox)
Nothing we’ve seen so far backs up this insanely high road line. But maybe South Florida is just uniquely kryptonite to Roll Damn Tide.
LSU (-7) at South Cakalaky (Noon, ABC)
Perhaps we will get a classic defensive battle here, or Brian Kelly’s crew fixes their shit and rolls. Gamecock quartered back plays in googles, that’s pretty interesting.
Memphis (+6.5) at Florida State (Noon, ESPN)
Who ever thought this would be less than a full TD spread? Somewhere the Land of Eire, an increasingly agitated DJ Taj is demanding that his barkeep find this broadcast.
Oregon (-16.5) at Oregon State (3:30, Fox)
One suspects this edition of The Civil War might be a bit testier than average. Though it seems the rump Pac-2 is back up to 6. Anyway, I will watch just for the Niiiiiice Beaver! jokes.
Washington State (+4.5) at Washington (3:30, Peacock)
Technically, this might be neutral – but it’s in U-Dub’s city, which takes some of the shine off happenings. Wazzu has looked the friskier of the two jilted squadrons so far, and the Huskies might not be good at all.
Texas A&M (-3.5) at Florida (3:30, ABC)
The natives…will be restless. And not just because they’re Florida Men left out in the heat. Bonfire Cult has MOAR talent, but less desperation. Sneaky good fixtures are often made from these ingredients.
West By God Virginia (-1.5) at Pitt (3:30, ESPN2)
We couldn’t bear to leave Yinz out this week, a game of fine, unadulterated hatred. These teams both kind of suck, though. The unaligned will only watch in case of riot.
Pitt’s Unis are fucking class.
(Dear Christ, Bastard Man weren’t kidding about “Couging it”)
Fight fight fight FOAR Washington State
HonoUr and glory you must win!
There’s a joke to be made about purdue getting shellacked by the team that got beat by NIU,
Something something white WASP student bodies getting away with unlawful actions due to endowment?
You make it into the night thread, good man!
So much sexual tension between WVU and Pitt. They should just fuck already, get it over with.
Just put COUSIN on the back of every jersey
I’d be mildly perturbed by Wazzu being ahead, but that seems necessary for them to Coug It properly.
There it is!
Have now switched the WCS v Yinzers U
SMRT. Just tuned in on 2nd screen.
#MeToo, sound is on Apple Cup (streaming on tablet). GO COUGS!!
Have you ever been to Pullman?
Hippo always cheers FOAR the land grant school.
I need to watch everything I want on Hulu in the next six months, I’m not willing to pay $9.99/month to watch ads
Finish Letterkenny the watch all seasons of Fargo then Fuck it!
Cut the cord!
Tonight’s challenge? Find a way to not have my new tattoo completely gore out the hotel sheets thus costing me extra cleaning charges.
Damn, this thing is leaky as fuck.
I’ve got something like 16 tattoos and I’ve never experienced anyone with a heavier hand ever.
I was at the bar ordering me “Turd” Guinness – in the local parlance – and I started to feel leakage running down my arm there at the bar. Asked the bartender for a couple of napkins and now he has to dispose medical waste.
The artwork is glorious but someone has to teach the young grasshopper to not lean in so damn hard on her tattoo gun.
Let’s have a glass of wine to change things up and I’ll grab a mop and bucket.
Consider a bath or if the hotel has a hot tub use that. The hot water may help to open the pore and wash it out.
(Disclaimer: Never had a tattoo. Don’t listen to me.)
Slather it with some hot glue. The pain will subside eventually.
“You load sixteen tattoos and what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt.”
-Herve Villechaize
go get some plastic wrap, gauze, and tape from the store, wrap with the plastic, tape, and then tape the gauze along the edges, that should work
She used a really sticky piece of plastic like Saran Wrap and I was supposed to keep it on for 2 days and my brain thought how the fuck is the tattoo going to get better while stewing in blood for two days?
So I lifted the bottom edge of the wrap and my bathroom turned into a crime scene.
Jesus Christ I got dizzy seeing all of that blood.
Then I realized I got my first tattoo in 1980 and the technique for making a tattoo hasn’t changed so why don’t I just treat it like all of my other ones.
So much blood.
Wine! I need wine!
Yes, now I’m drinking a red.
I see the saran wrap a lot nowadays, I think they’ve changed the instructions they give out for some reason
Yeah, they stopped using tattoo goo also. What’s cool is the spray they gave me is a CBD spray and the girl said “This is good, it’s made from CBD!”
Like it’s a magical elixir.
Dude, I’m from California. I understand CBD.
You are doing a bangup job convincing me that NEVAR getting a tattoo is a fine idea. I honestly don’t have the upper body definition for any of the cool shit, anyway,
Trump: “I’m going to stop sending firefighting money to California and let the state burn!”
Me: “…go on…”
https://youtube.com/shorts/R09_yS1VV9U?si=EBg70lUw7QRi7URI
Secular Big Love State to the touchdown place!
As a non JV follower, what should I watch next? To quote one of our own, Cocks and Tigers was rocking.
I get A & M v Gators
Ducks v Beavs
Irish v Purdue (nope)
I’d go for the animal planet feature on pond animals.
A&M v Gators but they’re in a lightning delay. So Nice Beavers in the meantime.
I’m of course glued to the Apple Cup that shouldn’t be played in Sep-fuckin-tember.
Why the fuck don’t I get that game. All my Yank affiliates are out of Spokane or Seattle?!?!?
Oh right, the other fucking travesty of this situation. It’s Peacock only.
Great job Pac-Random Integer.
To the HantaAIDS computer!
as a Gators and Fins fan I should take this delay opportunity to go fly a kite
Yikes! There’s always next year.
Well, not for James Earl Jones, so you got that going for you.
With a key attached to the tail!
Who knows what could happen?
They’ve all been ass on toast. Mostly watching Backyard Brawl (WCS, y’all needs to DUE BETTER) and Secular Big Love Derby.
Switch to a channel you don’t have and watch the static or the To Subscribe Please Call screen until something better turns on?
Goddamn. We did so much walking today it was fucking insane. We had a tour guide for the Jameson distillary then a walking tour across the river and all over old Dublin to the Guinness store house and our tour guide was pushing us to stay sober.
Two old schools of thought we need to sort out today.
Guinness is served icy fucking cold with a head between 12- 18 centimeters.
It is also meant to be chugged not sipped.
When they serve you a pint in a Guinness labeled glass your first drink is supposed to “Split the G” on the label which means it’s 3 big gulps to get there. Hold it in your mouth for 3 seconds, drink then exhale through your nose.
Your pint glass contains between 3-4 chugs.
This is knowledge dropped from THE FUCKING SOURCE!
Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to have another 3 chug pint.
Slainte!
Goodness gracious this drunk loves to walk.
We got a right proper walk in today.
When I was in Dublin this didn’t exist yet, so you should go do it so I can experience it vicariously: https://www.dublinpubcrawl.com/
Actually I guess it did exist and I just somehow didn’t find out about it, but still, go and tell us about it!
Are you sure you didn’t actually go on it and just don’t remember because you got so drunk?
I’ve pretty much given up on TV except every once in a while I’ll get a hair to see Shogun or The Terror when it suddenly popped up on Netflix. Anyway. I started watching Reacher last night. It’s not bad.
I just started watching The Terror. I thought it was an anthology series so it would be good for working out, but it’s just a regular show. A pretty good one, I might add.
each season is different, Season 1 is great others leave a bit to be desired
Bad time for the cock’s pierogi disease to show up.
For 3 solid hours I was . . . happy . . . last night. Springsteen played his motherfucking heart out. One snag: Mrs. Fozz made us late and we did not catch the first line of “Hungry Heart.” My lawyer has informed her we are splitsville.
So sad you missed “Everybody’s got”.
He’s got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack.
Nicely cross referenced!
& speaking of, an interesting read, if somewhat sad: https://www.outsideonline.com/adventure-travel/essays/baltimore-jack-appalachian-trail/
Fun fact, Buddy calls his junior year spring break Baltimore Jack.
first line was sponsored by Lipitor
/about to leave for pig pickin’ as I am given to understand its called
Mrs. Horatio: I didn’t know you were dressing fancy for this!
Me: (looks down as Hawaiian shirt, jeans, and green Converse sneakers) What?
No overalls? Should be a tucked in Hawaiian shirt into denim overalls.
I’ve got some news about your wife and her varying levels of sarcasm.
Well that should be real helpful scotchnaut, thanks a lot.
So Rikki hasn’t ruined her for all other men?
Oh they call it “pickin” these days, eh?
Talk more on your shirt!
That honestly sounds like what BeerguyRob was wearing most times that we’ve hung out.
What is a catch? JV edition!
BLEEEERGH loves them Tigers!
If they were both down simultaneously, then one foot was IN. Touchdown. The only way it’s not is if the out of bounds foot came down first, and that didn’t happen. Booooooooooo!
I think we’re complaining about two different Blerghhh’s.
Randy Moss and Eminem in a commercial for Lay’s.
Yep, I’m old
Gamecock Disfunction!
Tiger Disfunction!
Goal line INT brought to you by Pfizer.
Florida State might be in trouble
Why, did they admit a homosexual?