Guten Tag, drones.
Before we get to the topic at had I just want to say that I am sitting in rainy and oddly chilly Connecticut, having just spent a week in Old San Juan, Puerto Rico, (as opposed to what? Old San Juan, Illinois?), something I don’t recommend unless you like a lot of sun, a lot of beer, a smidge of rum, a lot of history, (that’s El Morro in the featured image, one of two forts you can tour in San Juan for a total of $10; I very much recommend doing both, while carrying a lot of water and sun screen), very friendly people, outstanding roast pork, a surprising selection of paper towels, and weed stores every two blocks.
Seriously, it’s almost like San Juan’s zoning regulations demand said stores be spaced no more than that apart, lest someone so inclined not ever be as high as they might desire.
Also, try to time your visit to make sure that Don T. is in town, because he will drop everything to chauffeur you around, will introduce you to family members, will take you to all the best places for various things, and who most importantly speaks Spanish and will facilitate pretty much everything.
Don clearly takes great pride in Puerto Rico, (maybe not the power company but we never lost power even once during our visit there, so I’m not sure what the issue is; worked great for us), and it shows in his willingness to drop everything (except lunch with his madre, which makes sense because he is not suicidal), and deal with two idiots lost in a foreign land, (Puerto Rico is part of the US, albeit it a territory, something our politicians could be a little better at remembering), with very little of the language other than saying “uno mas cerveza, por favor.” Mrs. Horatio and I could not be more grateful for all of Don’s many courtesies during our visit, and it would not have been one-half as much fun as it was without him.
Go to Puerto Rico and have fun. Do not, however, slide down two waterfall flumes in the rainforest at 55+ and think you’re going to walk away without some back pain, because that is not going to happen.
But there was no way I wasn’t going after the 20-something girl who professed to be afraid of everything did.
Anyway, this week we draft acronyms. Webster’s defines an acronym as “an identifier formed from some of the letters (often the initials) of a phrase and used as an abbreviation.” So that’s the guidance you get for this draft. If it fits that definition, you can draft it.
With the first pick I will take perhaps the greatest acronym of them all, ‘EBUG’ which of course stands for ’emergency back-up goalie.’
The EBUG comes in, during the regular season, if a team’s two goalies are not able to play. Each home team is required to have one available at every home game, but they can’t be a paid team employee because they have to be available to either team should the need arise. They seemingly have to have some prior experience as a goaltender, but apparently high school play qualifies. Other fun facts, (all from the link starting this paragraph), they get paid an hourly rate for sitting in the stands, $500 if they have to play, (would I take $500 to have Alex Ovechkin fire a piece of vulcanized rubber at my head? No. No I would not), and they get to keep their game jersey as well, which is pretty cool.
But not as cool as ‘EBUG.’
The rest of you are on the clock.



I am very very late to this party, but checked all of Balls’ posts and do not believe he (or anyone else) drafted PAWG, so I’m gonna take that and hope I did not BLAIR it . . . use incognito mode if you’re not familiar.
Nobody took DFO? JFC on a cracker!
I’ll take tWBS *immediately*.
(he’d be disappointed in me, but fortunately he’s still asleep next to that CVS employee he brought home last night)
smh
www
without it, we wouldn’t be heres on this site
The DENNIS System
[taps banner quote]
That went so early.
yah mah bad WCS , search failed me least i didnt go with the magic word of the day
At a work meeting about 20 years ago, one manager wanted ideas for promoting our software platform. I suggested Computers Using New Technology.
The manager was unimpressed…”That sounds a little basic. Let’s focus on terminology a little more in line with our advanced software.”
There was one guy on my wavelength who spent the next few minutes covering his mouth like Stefon, so it was worth it.
6. I mean it’s just sitting there, so I’ll go with B.R.o.t.H. – Beast Rebels of the Hellscape.
Jannik Sinner’s opponent had to fight off multiple break points to win his only game the set, which just ended 6-1. I do not believe there is much suspense remaning in this match.
PB&J.
PEMDAS , please excuse my dear aunt sally being one of the more useful ones
GIF, for Graphics Interchange Format.
It’s pronounced ‘zif’
Yes, but is it a sandwich?
TRT. For men with low T.
Between this and the SCUBA picks I feel like this draft is turning into a series of veiled swipes at Ben Shapiro.
two birds one song AC/DC TNT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rB9-McrpJew
MHRA, one of the agencies I’ve had the pleasure to deal with at my work.
It’s the UK’s equivalent of the FDA
Is it pronounced “Myra”? It seems to be ringing a bell with me from a past life.
We already had SCUBA, but most people don’t know that TUBA actually stands for Terrible Underwater Breathing Apperatus
CAPTCHA- Completely Automated Public Turing Test to Tell Computers and Humans Apart
(the T is doing a lot of work in this one)
KSK
5. In keeping with my origin story, it’s gotta be H.E.L.P.eR.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJzmYbhx_xQ
I forgot how much I love this robot (and show). I’d have been happy with this as my #1 pick.
The Colorado Rockies are 9-50.
If they lose to the Mets today they will beat an MLB record for futility that has stood since 1884.
That’s not great hustle, boys!!
Well, if you really want your name in the history books, does it matter if it is positive?
It’s funny because losses by the Mets are usually the ones that end up making history.
still down with OPP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idx3GSL2KWs
Yeah, I know you.
As opposed to Trent Green, who finds himself at a bit of a loss.
FAFO
Fuck Around and Find Out
Mount Etna erupted today and the film on the news of hundreds of tourists scurrying towards the low ground is, don’t tempt Mother Nature interesting.
I saw that and it fits with my first entry FAFO, which is usually preceded by the one Fucking around saying “Hold my beer”.
How appropriate that Italy’s volcano is experiencing “strombolian activity”.
Here I was stupidly thinking Etna gave scientists some kind of warning before it would go off. I guess the warning is, hey, I’m an active volcano, stay away.
That might be slightly my bad, oopsie
SPAM
Either specially processed American meat or shoulder of pork and ham
I always heard specially processed army meat
Squirrels, Possum, and Mice
RAM
Random Access Memory
or
Ream Anal Maw
NFL
For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
Oh, you ate one too?
I thought it was Full Unadulterated Carnal Knowledge
Depends on where you matriculated life I suppose.
The dictionary says that an acronym can be pronounced as a new word (SCUBA) but if it can’t it’s an initialism (FBI). And it doesn’t have to be just the first letter of each word, it can be the first few.
Therefore, I’ll go with:
ADCOMSUBORDCOMPHIBSPAC
(Administrative Command, Amphibious Forces, Pacific Fleet Subordinate Command)
“Webster’s defines ‘acronym’ as…”
-Brick Meathook, starting the worst graduation address in history
LET THE WAR BEGIN
Eh, this whole thing’s FUBAR already.
Hey, that’s my pick!
It’s lunchtime, so I’ll draft a BLT.
Bring
That
Booty
Has anyone taken BYOB yet?
You just did
T.Y.P.O. – Take Yo Panties Off
(I only just realized this was an acronym)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYOtkn3sZgI
4. K.I.T.T. – Knight Industries Two Thousand
Why did they make KITT sound bitchy?
In those days, men were looking to leave their wives for their cars.
Smoother transition, makes sense.
NASA
Need Another Seven Astronauts, sourry bad joke from the challenger disaster.
Also
Nice Air Show Assholes
NIIOMTPLABOPARMBETZHELBETRABSBOMONIMONKONOTDTEKHSTROMONT
Looks like someone just decided to google “world’s longest acronym”
I’m gonna need to know what it’s an acronym of.
https://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/world-records/67249-longest-acronym
WTAF
/not a pick in this draft
Pretty fucking obvious innit?
if you say it loud enough you’ll always sound precocious
In the Russian translation of Mary Poppins, she was the villain for supporting the children’s innocence at the expense of the bank’s wealth and the greater good of the Motherland.
Going back to DOOD and taking FUPA.