So, Senorita Weaselo and I were upstate this past weekend.
Well, the Hudson Valley counts as upstate. If you’re from the city. Which we are. So, sure. It’s a welcome respite, and as we know I normally work like a dog in June and early July, so it’s nice to do something for the summer break.
Anyway, there’s a couple of Buddhist monasteries and temples in the area, and they’re beautiful, and they’re peaceful, and I’ve had meditative moments where, and this is not a joke, I recorded all the flags blowing on a windy day because the grommets were ringing from the flagpoles. It is over 6 1/2 minutes long, and because my lizard brain forgot about the Voice Notes memo existing, recorded it on an app that is otherwise no longer available. I cannot move it from this app because the file is too big, and so the app shall stay on my phone for this one meditative 6:42 long recording.
Actually, this monastery is the setting of our story! So, we went back (after blueberry picking earlier in the day), because it’s nice, and I again enjoy the flags. I’m in the process or parking the car and a man is pointing and beckoning to us. So, I parked, turn the car off, and I think that he’s trying to tell me to park closer or otherwise move my car. But here’s fine, and the car’s already parked! Senorita Weaselo and I get out. The guy tells her to come on, and other things in Chinese (which she’s unfortunately never learned and/or forgotten from when she was a baby) but we get the gist of it and follow him to wait in line.
Why are we waiting in line? This is a good question. But there was food being given to people. (We were after the people so even if there was still food we, being very confused, just kind of went around to the rest of the grounds.) Some prayer offering? No idea.
Also, it wasn’t windy, so no ringing flags. That was a disappointment.
Anyway, the news!
-The Charmslinger is QB1 to start off for the VEP.
-Jalen Ramsay is doing better than the CB1 for his former Dolphins. Since Artie Burns may have torn his ACL. (Second opinions pending.)
Other news: I hit Level 47 in Pokémon Go! (looks suspciously at locker hallway). This puts me 3 levels and (checks calculator) 56.9% of the way to Level 50… fuck, that’s a lot to still go after 9 years. Anyway, feel free to mock me, as there’s… baseball. Yeah, sorry, everyone else.
Well, there’s the MLS All-Stars vs. the Liga MX All-Stars! Winners to be sacrificed to the Mayan gods, losers to El Salvador. Or vice-versa, I forget how the Mesoamerican ball game sacrifices worked.
I prepared some dope guacamole today. And last night I had a couple good mai tais.
And that’s about all I’ve accomplished since June 30th.
You say that like its a bad thing
I’m currently bingeing/marathoning the show Supernatural. I feel like this (bingeing) would make for a fun draft topic if we could figure out a set of constraints that prevented it from devolving into a session of “what’s your favorite TV show?”
There have been two episodes that are straight-up X-Files but with Sam and Dean instead of Mulder and Scully.
Appropriate serving sizes.
That is, when consuming X, this is the appropriate gluttonous behavior to maximize your enjoyment / minimize your regret.
For example: I had two EXCELLENT unphotogtaphed mai tais with lilikoi foam at dinner last night. Any more and I would have overconsumed and regretted it. Any less and I’d have been cheating myself of a good time.
Featuring Modern Day Bad QB Hoarder Andrew Berry.
https://fb.watch/B1nR3who4f/
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Harry Dean Stanton took this role after reading the first page of script. He was immediately interested in being part of the film.
So Buddy has lost 30 pounds over the past year and got all his levels under the “insulin patient in waiting” level.
Why I have been away is for good reasons, I realized how much I was using my phone to isolate and how much my life was going into the shitter as a result, so I do all my social media-ing now on my desktop and I feel amazing. I try to keep cell phone usage to under an hour each day and the freedom of not feeling like I am “on call” every waking moment.
I will say, you notice other people’s usage acutely when you do not use your phone as much.
Keep up the work with the lifestyle changes.
You must feel so much better now
Well done. Finding balance is a challenge for everyone. Once you do find it, it’s a great place to be.
Good for you man; sure, less cushion to push in, but your health is more important than all the bear parties in Ibiza.
Don’t worry Buddy, I found 10 of those pounds you lost. I’m sitting on them right now!
To answer the very first question on this post:
One place is the Shenandoah Valley in Virginia. Up the valley is south, down valley is north.
It also has a river that splits into two branches then recombines with itself.
Upper Canada and lower Canada meant down the river but was backwards back in history too!
Will you be answering moar questions?
https://youtu.be/aW7QABOM_os?si=CGG1WhrQpEetJZ5T
Ciao tutti
Hey, I found out how to reduce concussions in the NFL! Just in time for camp!
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The Fixxx addressed this way back in 1983 but Rozelle was having none of it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAofFHPRZTE
Auto +1 for any and all The Fixx.
That’s why they were so sure Tua had a back injury.
“We showed him this graphic. He couldn’t possibly have hit his head. HE KNEW.”
ESPN announcers talking up Aroldis Chapman’s great season and how he’d get the Red Sox a significant haul off they traded literally two pitches before he gives up an absolute bomb to CF to blow the lead.
As the official taste-tester for the business, I had more than a few of these babies this evening.
“Hand slaughtered” isn’t the selling point they think it is.
But it is right up your alley!
No, no, no…it’s Hands Laughtered. THE CHICKENS HAD FUN!
Every southern barbeque place has a smiling pig on their sign.
I liked the smiling octopus restaurants in Korea
After learning just how smart they are, the whole octopus-eating thing bugs me a lot more than it used to.
Then again, I’m soft enough that if I had to take any part in meat production, I’d be a vegetarian.
Yeah, I won’t eat octopus anymore.
Fuck them squid, though.
Creepy-ass sea monsters. Would never eat a squid. I like calamari though.
Calamari is pig anus so that’s okay
A Porky Trombone?
I rarely eat them anymore for the same reason, but I will occasionally have a bite off someone elses plate if it’s really really good
And I would be totally fine slaughtering my own meat except for the part where it would be a lot of effort and I’m really lazy
The “Halal” thing is getting very big up here and it denotes that Muslims and others of their like can ‘safely’ eat it because the animal was killed humanely while the killer was facing Mecca and did a somersault. (as I understand it) Read your Abracadabra religions, smh…
So weird that halal and kosher is kinda the same thing, yet the two sides don’t really get along.
HEY GUYS, LET YOUR FEAR OF PORK UNITE YOU!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
There’s a halal slaughterhouse in Bloomfield, near the Thomas Hooker Brewery, which makes some very good beers while noticeably lacking the prostitutes one might expect at a brewery named after a hooker.
Or I should say there was, because I think it was forced to close when a cow got loose and made a break for it for an extended period of time through the streets of said Bloomfield.
Cows ruin everything
Cows and dwarves seem to run through Horatio’s life on a regular basis-one far faster than the other.*
*the cows (dwarves got them little legs)
Wait until I tell you about the strip bar near my house that closed down sometime after they found a severed cow’s head in the parking lot.
The place was called the Ultra Violet Cafe, but amongst the cognoscenti it was referred to as the ‘Ultra Virus’
No one ever figured out what the deal was with the cow’s head.
https://www.nbcconnecticut.com/news/local/animal-head-found-outside-willimantic-business/1959525/
Building has since been torn down and replaced by a Popeye’s Fried Chicken.
Never change, Willimantic. Never change.
Rotting Cow Head is a good name for a death metal band.
Fell off RFK Jr’s tailgate?
Shit, no one thought of that back then. You might have cracked the case!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2-pQr8k2my0
This view from the umpire’s mask of a batter facing a 101 mph inside fastball has a lot less pants-shitting than it would if I were the batter.
Yankees v Jays has been quite entertaining. Vladdy’s defence is not the best.
Things not important to Vlad Sr: Batting gloves, whether a pitch is in the strike zone
Things not important to Vlad Jr: Defense, calorie counting
I forget who the player was, but someone started hitting without batting gloves because he came up to bat tugging on his gloves and really struggling and Jorge Posada called him a pussy.
Moises Alou used to piss on his hands and didn’t wear gloves.
Posada did too. But only during spring training.
You don’t need gloves when your hands are leather.
Mientkiewicz? That’s almost definitely spelled wrong, but it rings a bell.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Co_Ph6zvPNY&pp=ygUZYnVkIGxpZ2h0IGRyIGdhbGF6a2lld2ljeg%3D%3D
That actor petted my dog!
YES HE DID
Getting fancy dinner tomorrow, chef’s counter at this place: https://guide.michelin.com/us/en/illinois/chicago/restaurant/carino
We did that on a whim at this place in Spain. It was probably the high point of our trip.
https://aimia.cat/
I would have thought the high point was while you were shopping and hearing the Spanish pronounce aspiradora.
It’s spelled Pia Zadora.
Haven’t heard of that particular vacuum cleaner model.
You’re obviously not a producer.
Google translate sez they have a dish called “snails with lightning” on the menu.
Hmm, doesn’t look that edible but I guess I’ll try it
If I had a nickle for everything I have said that.
Not sure if that refers to the mussels dish but it was beyond divine.
Oh that looks awesome. We hit Jeong when I was there. That was awesome too
Chicago has declined in a lot of ways over the years, but it’s kept its standing as a great food city across the board from low end to high
I never had a bad meal there.
Buon appatito
Oldest Fozz Spawn to Middle Fozz Spawn: “You are an absolute piece of fucking shit and I feel like fucking killing you right now.”
Five minutes later they left to play golf, laughing and smiling.
I swear, they’re like 14 year old girls in a text battle.
I have to drive to work tomorrow, to DC. I have to do it, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be unleashing a firestorm of road rage at 6 am EST. FUCK!
The afternoon commute will be 10x worse, make sure to refresh your road napalm supplies during the day
Truth. I make this drive 2-3 times a week. It is brutal. Although, I was making up very dirty songs in teh car and singing them at the top of my lungs. It helps break up the drive.
I arrive at 1:00AM Friday 8/1 at BWI and pick up a car and drive down to Arlington, after about a nine hour hard-drinking air journey from Los Angeles via fucking Atlanta. Watch out.
I’ll be on vacation. Drunk as fuck and sleeping in the doghouse.
Should be early enough to beat traffic, lol
Just fold the Browns already.
https://www.instagram.com/p/DMd_tnOALow/?igsh=MWpjaWZsODR3OGVyYg==
Supposedly that was done on purpose to make it go viral, which is somehow even more pathetic.
No way. If they did it on purpose, that guy would still be glued to the platform, completely unable to successfully pratfall.
This is a very fair point.
Ooh, two seats in F on my flight just opened up ad I’m first on the upgrade list! False hope here we go!
I kinda wish I owned a fuzzy orange bucket hat now
I’m sorry that your original one and your backup one both got stolen.
Upgraded! Seat 6A here I come!
Narrator: “Zymm walked into the set of the latest Final Destination movie. Let’s see how she makes out.” [folds fingers, looks intently into the camera]
Bad news: F is for Fart Class.
For real though, I feel like people have smellier travel farts than they did a few years ago. I bet it’s an ozempic thing
Worse than health person farts?
I feel like I would have to do a blind smell test to establish which is worse and I don’t want to do that so we’ll just have to live in ignorance oh well
That is really fucking funny
Ok that’s funny, need scientific research stat.
Good news for Redshirt!
Recently released TE Noah Fant is visiting!
Oh, you thought this was about Hendrickson or that talented unsigned rookie? lol
I automatically assume anyone named Noah is a bible thumper. Or at least his parents were.
One thing for sure, he can build a boat measured in cubits.
Or they gave the name orally and got caught saying “no…ah”. That’s how that one kid ended up being named “crapiwroteitdownsomewhere”
Or Jewish
Ok, so I know nothing of Pokemon except:
a) Pikachu is the little yellow guy
2) It’s apparently short for “pocket monsters” (heh)
Do you get anything tangible for playing Pokemon Go? Rewards or anything? Or is it just fun and exercise and what have you?
It’s a game, you get entertainment out of it. I like it as a travel game, it’s great for killing time at airports and wandering around a city. And you can make a little travel scrapbook with it which is fun
I don’t think there are any app games that give you anything tangible, are there?
There used to be some second screen stuff that burned through venture capital by giving stuff away. I’m still not sure what the purpose was, I guess the nanobots overwrote that part of my memory.
HQ Trivia. I won something like $300 over the course of a couple years or however long that game existed. It was fun!
I miss the time when people thought losing money by providing goods and services for way under cost was a great business model
You kill time at airports by drinking and watching how airplanes are refueled.
You kill time wandering around a city by wandering around the city. Look at things. Observe people. Find bars. Drink at bars.
You can do all that and ALSO walk a few blocks out of the way in a direction you wouldn’t usually go to check out a gym, or go into a building that looks nondescript from outside because a pokestop tells you there’s a neat piece of public art inside.
And when you have a 6 hour overnight layover where all the bars and lounges are closed and flights don’t start up until 5 am then it makes trudging around in circles to stay awake way better
“Sigh. Okay, better put some Mountain Dew on ice, because this is going to take all night.” – Eli Manning, preparing to educate you
Isn’t everything past Westchester county “upstate” if you’re from NYC? Including all of Western NY which is over rather than up?
I’m pretty sure I will never get past level 43 in pokemon go because I hate the battle league. It’s been kind of annoying me recently anyway, but the microtransactions are really handy for padding my transaction count for Bilt
You do the bare minimum and/or find a friend and one of you just tank!
Wait, friend battles count?? Score!
I wonder if there’s anywhere in the world where they used south (or another direction!) as “up” on maps.
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20160614-maps-have-north-at-the-top-but-it-couldve-been-different
South Detroit? Isn’t that in the Great White North?
You can take the midnight train from there and go annnnywhere.