Well, we finally made it to the fireworks factory! Honestly, this has been the most entertaining season I’ve experienced since 2011- (had to throw a Giants reference in here in some way) what with the unexpected emergent teams (two of which you’re going to watch this evening!) some mind-boggling upsets, younger players coming to the fore, owners getting exposed in new and interesting ways, etc. It’s been a blast.

As always, we’ll go…

To The Game!

Seahawks/Patriots:

-Yes, New England is the home team, I know everyone was wondering.

Hot Takery Alert?: I really don’t have an issue with this version of the team. There’s no Brady or Belichick to annoy me. “But what about that simp of an owner?” you say. That icky, creepy bastard just got his comeuppance earlier this week by getting snubbed by the HOF. That’s a degree of personal humiliation that folks of his stature rarely experience. I’d also point out that if he were on your team, Gronk would be a loveable goofball but playing where he was he was dragged down by all the crap that was going on around him.

-The O/U sits at 45.5. Do you think we’ll get there? Each team is going to try to slow the game to a crawl and try to stop the opposing run game. The only scenario I see is Seattle running away late with the help of a pick-six or returned fumble late.

-Speaking of, having played a few top 10 defenses Maye has 6 fumbles and is passing at a pedestrian 58% rate this postseason.

-His peer however has nary a turnover yet.

-They usually talk about the D watching film but it seems as though Darnold has been self-assessing himself-(with the coaches help of course) in 2 of their 3 losses he gave up the ball late. Nowadays when he feels pressure he doesn’t force a play and instead throws it away or takes the sack.

-All the kudos belong to Vrabel-let’s not forget that this squadoo was coming off back-to-back 3-14 seasons.

-There’s always an unsung hero that catches a 4th down pass, makes a game-saving tackle, forces a fumble that is recovered by someone else, etc. My pick is 2nd string wide receiver Jake Bobo because his last name is funny. I’m not a complicated/serious person.

-I’d look for a few long passes outside the numbers to JSN in order to try and break the game open for Seattle. If Maye can get the time, look for the same to Boutte, who seems to be the Pats only speedster.

-Methinks that Seattle can afford one, maybe two turnovers and still win. The Pats? If they have 2 or more it’s all over.

As I always say, do please pop in and say hello no matter what you’re doing-we’d love to hear from you. Cheers!

 

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yeah right

Well this is over.

Gatoraids

hopefully greatriots dont trigger any JESTs flashbacks from Darnold

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Redshirt

Sam Darnold: Super Bowl Starting Quarterback.

WCS

Super Bowl WINNING quartered back

(I’m from The Future)

rockingdog

Gooooo Football! 🏈

Hope this game is Rockingggg!!!

NotShogunButShogun

I like the part where they play the game

Bogdanski

Curling kept us entertained right up til kickoff

yeah right

Time for California weather envy.

Doktor Zymm

It’s a gorgeous day today

yeah right

Fucking flawless here.

Don T

Buenas nocheeee. SEA rout. /ninja smoke bomb to hide weed smoke

BaldingSpiritually

These commercials are… meh

litre_cola

We don’t get the fancy ones up here in your hat.

Beerguyrob

HOW THE FUCK YOU DOING, BOYS?!

Have a great day. I’ll check in later.

IMG_3254
Redshirt

I guess my ticket got lost in the mail.

Unsurprised

I think you were just offscreen from one of NBC’s shots.

SonOfSpam

Kind of a Stay-Puft Man vibe. Love it.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Are you playing with Bad Bunny?

Petronel

WOO thanks Joe

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And now Spam needs a second mortgage

Unsurprised

JUST FUCKING PLAY ALREADY

SonOfSpam

Score prediction?

Seattle wins 30-20, JSN is MVP

litre_cola

I have him ATTD sprinkled here and there.

yeah right

Sounds accurate.

SonOfSpam

Hoping the first quarter ends 0-0 or 10-0 or 10-10. No reason. But thanks to Sharky for drawing me a 0-0.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Seattle 14-0 would be a big win for the whole clubhouse and also my wallet.

Doktor Zymm

C’mon totally different scenario ending in my numbers!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ah SAP…eases the pain…

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

(SAP is how you get the Spanish language feed)

Unsurprised

Or a concussion, which is also preferable to hearing these NBC jackasses

BugEyedBoo

Needs more IDoc.

Doktor Zymm

INFORMAL CATEGORY OF BIRD V. PEOPLE WITH POLITICAL ALLEGIANCES: LET US GOOOOOO!

King Hippo

Each squadron has too many goddamned captains.

Mr. Ayo

If you have six captains, you have none.

If you have seven captains, you’re about to get your ass kicked.

Gatoraids

Stratego only allows 4 per side

Unsurprised

What is ‘the Russian White Army?’

SonOfSpam

Cmon TAILS

SonOfSpam

DAMMIT, there goes the house

Unsurprised

IT”S A TRAP!

Gumbygirl

A few more hours of Collinsworth vs two weeks of him at the Olympics? Devil’s bargain, but I’ll take it, I guess.

Gumbygirl

Oh, and Hi Porky!

Porky Prime

Greetings and salutations!

The Maestro

WE AHH SO FACKIN’ HYPED! NO ONE DENIES THIS!

Redshirt

(sighs painfully)

IMG_3232
Redshirt

Okay, did the over win or the under win on the anthem bet?

litre_cola

This has to hit the over in O/U anthem time.

Porky Prime

Bet your ass no one of color was singing the anthem this year.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is that a jheri curl on a white dude?

yeah right

What’s a Puth?

Is that the hairy groin region?

yeah right

I choose to listen to this on mute.

My refrigerator running sounds exponentially better I am certain.

yeah right

This is much more entertaining on mute.

WCS

What happens if a guitar string breaks during the song?

King Hippo

Colonies revert to British rule.

Redshirt

It became a cappella?

Doktor Zymm

If it’s a good guitarist they just work around it

King Hippo

Y’all think we’ll get all the way to Superb Owl C, or will humanity destroy itself first?

Porky Prime

Good Lord willing our alien overlords will still want to hold it

Redshirt

I assume the dolphins or apes will resume football once we’re enslaved.

Doktor Zymm

They’ll call it 100 like they did with 50 and they’ll be EXTRA annoying about it

Porky Prime

I should be Whole Hog against the Patriots but my otherwise Flawless wife put a hunny on them as is her wont so… beer and wings are my friend today

BaldingSpiritually

Here we go anyone but the Patriots here we go

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Am I on a delay? Just seeing Bon Jovi now. And wasn’t he a Philly fan?

Doktor Zymm

I thought he was from North Jersey? But I guess he’s sane enough not to be a Jets fan

Unsurprised

South Jersey. He’s a Philly boy. He even owned part of the Arena league Soul team

WCS

Oh, shit, Classic Bon Jovi.

litre_cola

I have a bet in that have both qbs to throw a pick. Hail Gamblor

Porky Prime

So is the Charlie Kirk worship halftime still happening or was that canceled?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Pretty sure Kid Rock and the rest of the little cocks are still playing

Doktor Zymm

Whenever I hear this mentioned I roll my eyes so hard I risk flipping them around completely and missing the whole game

WCS

There’s no sound from the TV in here… who are these guys? Diet Bon Jovi?

Unsurprised

Green Day

WCS

comment image

They look… different…

Unsurprised

Time is a motherfucker

Porky Prime

Grey Day

King Hippo

Dean Pelton, national treasure

King Hippo

Does Green Day sound less shitty en espanol?

Unsurprised

It’s playing in English

Unsurprised

This is a novel interpretation of the national anthem

Unsurprised

It’s embarrassing that France has La Marseillaise, a badass war song that most countries have adopted localized versions of for themselves. Meanwhile, we’re still using a shitty English drinking song.

Doktor Zymm

It’s only the tune that comes from a drinking song, and even though it was written during a battle I appreciate that our anthem isn’t as bloody as some of ’em

Unsurprised

Bloodless violence is how we absolve ourselves from our cruelty, so I think it needs more blood.

King Hippo

Does Sam Darnold get an extra sticker book if SEA wins tonight? ASK the question, whoever the sideline lady is!!

Unsurprised

REMINDER: Peacock is only available in Spanish. 😛

Redshirt

For the last time this season: SHUT UP, CRIS!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Greetings, kommentists, may your drinks be cold and the Patriots choke.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Easy there, Diddy

Unsurprised

Acquitted on most charges!

King Hippo

I originally forgot this was gonna be on NBC. Mute button, you stay close at hand, pretty please.

litre_cola

Is that Collinsworth?

King Hippo

es verdad

Porky Prime

So you guys are going to have to catch me up since I’ve been away. Who’s playing today?

ballsofsteelandfury

Okay, I know you’re not going to believe this:

A USC QB!

Porky Prime

Good. God.

King Hippo

Is this the first to EVAR play in a Superb Owl? I couldn’t think of another.

King Hippo

Damn, man. You covered FAST!!

/also, I have a kid living in ABQ now, I will remind her to wave if she sees ya

Unsurprised

I have a kid living in ABQ now

Good God. Why?

King Hippo

year of grad school in vocal performance at UNM, now…INERTIA!!

Unsurprised

Neat

Redshirt

All the favorites from the AFC decided to not show up this year.

Gatoraids

Tombot sadly pretending he was against picking the Seahwaks as a patriot when you know hes seething with envy until Inside Out tech can be completed

King Hippo

I only see 45.5 being in play if SeaTruthers run away with it, and then there’s Q4 garbage time scoring. Feels more 24-14-ish to Hippo.

And agreed, no problems with either squadron. Good point about the rarity of public humiliation for the likes of Kraft. I didn’t see that coming, making it all the sweeter.

WCS

Will Porky make an appearance?

Place your bets on DraftKings dot com.

Porky Prime

!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

MARKET MANIPULATION

Senor Weaselo

That’s a Kalshi move.

WCS

I hope you bet the over.

ballsofsteelandfury

Does “home team” even matter? The Pats decided to go with whites. Isn’t that their road colour?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

“IT’S THE ONLY CULAH THEY SHOULD EVAH WEAH! NO ONE DENIES THIS!”

Senor Weaselo

If anything would you want to be the road team since you get to call the toss?

Doktor Zymm

Does home team get the better locker room? I would have expected it to go to the higher seeded team

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