The Olympics are a gimme of course and I’m mighty grateful for them but news on other fronts? Well of course the first thing that came to the front of my frontal lobe is that there is a new city where the beautiful fight crime. I’m just going to assume the first episode is an investigation into why the odds of the Maple Leafs making the playoffs aren’t higher.
Flotsam and Jetsam:
-Retread Alert: Former Leader Of Men Bill Callahan has jumped aboard the Harbaugh train in New York and is now the QB coach of the Giants. I’m of a few minds about this news. The first notion is, “Great, another oldish white guy getting a chance at the expense of a younger candidate. Lovely.” A second thinker is, “Shee-it, we got ourselves an ex-head coach that is now a position coach (with that wealth of experience/knowledge) concentrating his efforts on our young stud!” As for the latter brain spillage, if he focuses on Dart not leading with his head and also choosing to run out of bounds, that would be great. The proof will not be in the pudding, it’ll be in the number of visits to the blue tent.
-Street Beat: Your boy over here has his ear to the ground/satellite radio and the general consensus is that the tight end class this draft year is dreadful. A youngster out of Oregano-Kenyon Sadiq-is thought to be heads and shoulders over all others at the position. It’s so early in the evaluation process but the Giants are looking at drafting a safety with their very high 1st pick. Please. No.
-Waaa? Brady Tkachuk is in an Intuit QuickBooks ad?
-Temperature Yinzing: Big Ben blasts Tomlin. Joey Porter Sr. in turn blasts Big Ben as a “lousy person”. That locker room divide was kept well under wraps for some time. (to me, anyway)
Here’s a shoutout to Mr. Kittle and these electrical station queries that have gained momentum.
I found discoloration on the inside part of the filter of my air filter. That kind of figures/explains some things. And it was nice knowing you
Women’s Luge: Whoever has the most aerodynamic countertop wins!
For all of our nine years old readers (because everyone else has seen this for a decade), the Trump FBI has started planting the division in the Nancy Guthrie investigation. Two weeks and lost as ever, Kash Patel is running, “SOME PEOPLE SAY THE SHERIFF HAS TDS AND REFUSES TO WORK WITH THE BRAVE MEN AND WOME OF THE FBI,” headlines so, as the exhaustion/reality that Nancy is long gone and the FBI cannot do shit and she’s dead settles in, the Cult Teevee already has the next fight tee’d up Charlie Kirk style to scream about how Trump, the long-known child rapist that his supporters have always known about and loved him for his ‘manliness’ and rape practices, would have solved this case if not for all the local police, spicks, jews, n-words, grannies, school teachers, and libtard cucks who kept them from succeeding.
Kind of like how they managed to fuck up the COVID response and still be the loudest assholes lying about their incompetence and affection for raping children, which all republican voting men have in 2026.
They say white culture is dying but these Finns and Swedes are going at it hammers and tongs. (and sticks)
What they mean is, white trash is having their moment right now.
.
I’m a dipshit. A friend I haven’t seen in-person in years invited me to sushi and then I didn’t really eat anything I ordered (I still took it home) because it was awkward eating in front of him and his wife or something.
I don’t understand. Are you one of the Plastics?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enY2SvjrEeE
No one will ever mistake me for being anorexic, but I am an asshole.
If you took it home that’s all good, plenty of reasons you might not be hungry at the time
/JD Vance wanders in
What’s this about giving the couch a reacharound?
It’s too bad Savannah Guthrie’s missing mother isn’t a long-known pedophile and foreign intelligence operator — the individuals who make up the top-levels of the Trump Administration would never have let her out of their sight for a minute!
Oh well. That’s what she gets for trusting border security to a guy who flexed his agenda by killing US citizens in Minnesota.
That’s why my mom lives on the other side of the Catalinas.
No worries, this guy is on it.
I feel safer knowing we have the A-team on the case!
They’re looking for YOU, widowed lady! And if you don’t let us stop the negroids in Minnesota, then how can we make a big sideshow of not solving your abduction?
Released and they still have to pay him, good move Phllies.
https://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/47910837/nick-castellanos-owed-20-million-released-phillies
Castellanos has always seemed like kind of a dick.
Can’t help but to think of this classic moment.
https://youtu.be/6fstNaoLpG8?si=jhd0sC7CGMt_G2Ku
A true classic.
At this point its fair to ask who isn’t in the Epstein files.
https://newrepublic.com/post/206510/dr-oz-epstein-files
These guys really loved the young stuff, didn’t they?
This is true when it comes to sandwiches.
Please do not fuck my sandwiches.
RIKKI: What about a Heather Chandler/Veronica Sawyer sandwich?
HORATIO: [thoughtfully takes a sip of his mineral water]
No deal.
Dr. Oz seemed like a pretty safe bet to be in them.
Thankfully I’m not since given my age and genetalia I would be on the victim side if anywhere
About that…
Last time I checked she’s about 20 years older than me and wasn’t a teenager when all this was happening
Yeah but we all know you have a time machine.
Fair, but you can’t fuck with your own timeline
It’s fair to ask who in Trump’s Cabinet isn’t in the Esptein Files
Hegseth. No one in their right mind would trust that asshole to keep his mouth shut.
I suspect that no coach over 50 will be effective at preventing a QB from getting head owies or otherwise injuring himself outside the pocket
Head owies, what are those?
-Trent Green
“our QBs never get head injuries, but we do see a lot of back problems”
-Miami medical staff
“Big Ben blasts Tomlin. Joey Porter Sr. in turn blasts Big Ben as a “lousy person”. That locker room divide was kept well under wraps for some time. (to me, anyway)”
As I’ve mentioned before, that Tomlin voodoo wears off with a quickness.
Ben was clearly upset that, despite appearances, Tomlin is NAWT a chocotaco
Joey Porter is right.
I got into Chicago late last night, less than 24 hours after someone was murdered on my block in a carjacking. For some reason I felt a lot better once I realized it happened on the other side of Broadway. Broadway isn’t a grid street so while the kid was killed on the same numerical block just down the street, it’s not quite the same geographical block.
The kid (22yo) who died was incredibly unlucky. No one was murdered in this neighborhood in all of 2025, the other guy in the car wasn’t injured, and while he was only shot twice one of the bullets was a direct shot to the heart.
They found the car later on down in Oakland (another neighborhood with zero murders last year), doors open in the middle of the street and with another corpse next to it. They’re not sure if that dead guy was one of the carjackers or what, kinda mysterious
Pour one out for the pioneer of carjacking, Eddie Griffin
https://www.wfmynews2.com/article/sports/suit-nba-player-watching-porn-drunk-before-crash/83-403271279
Eddie Griffin jerked so that Kellen Winslow Jr. could tug.
Law and Order Toronto is actually an alright show. It isn’t as good as Love after Lockup but nothing really is.
we watch it to see if we can recognize the location in the background
Had dinner on the early side tonight, so we may watch a movie. Suggestions?
I just downloaded Spirited Away to watch with the missus. But if you were thinking of heading out I think there might be seats available at a Melania screening.
Yeah it looks like there’s space.
DFO’s next panel: Arguing about Miyazaki movies!
Maps to the Stars – Julianne Moore dominates
T-34 – Russian tankers during WW2, gritty and awesome
The Pianist – just got around to watching it, man oh man
The Ice Storm
Just a few that I’ve sene recently.
(Maniac Cop was a disappointment but worth it for the 70s vibe)
Really enjoyed both main Oscar contenders (would put Sinners just barely above One Battle After Another), just in case you haven’t seen those.
Weapons was unhinged fun, depending on your “fun” definition.
You could rewatch Independence Day and laugh about how horribly the current Prez would handle such a situation. “We’re looking into the aliens very strongly; if they don’t behave I’ll slap a tariff on Saturn”
“Do the aliens have little kid aliens? Cause I haven’t fucked one of those yet. Yet.”
Ding ding ding, we decided on Sinners once it was clear you all weren’t gonna be helpful
You thought we would be helpful? That’s sweet
Sorry, I was getting laid.
Enjoy your movie though.
Poor little Lowratio, having to fake it on a Thursday.
“on a Thursday” like there aren’t also six other days in the week.
If there were intelligent life out there, the White House would be the first target.
I just watched ‘The Outfit’ on Netflix. Not a new movie, but it was good.
I also watched The Rock’s Oscar bait ‘The Smashing Machine’ and holy shit is it terrible. And I like Dwayne.
Yeah, that Smashing movie looked pretty unwatchable.
“Look, I’m roided up and my face looks weird” nah, I’ll just rewatch the Mulholland Drive scene and take a nap.
If I wasn’t so busy not writing tomorrow’s season premiere of Request Line, I’d do a bit where @jjfozz pitches the DFO Insiders his script for Falling Down 2: Charm City
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mVrGHmFPIYW7NIB_aTgoYc4AJkTJzRCn/view?usp=sharing
Note to self: put a pin in this, it could be fun.
I see the FBI is counting on the Arizona Cardinals Coaching Search Party to investigate Savannah Guthrie’s missing mom.
But ir does feel right that we’re watching the family simply follow ransom instruction daily because the authorities are just a bunch of nitwits who are never going to solve this.
My mother is terrified and driving my sister crazy. Because everyone wants to kidnap an 86 year old Italian mother with no assets and kids who couldn’t afford a quarter of any ransom requested.
Surprised she didn’t make a comment about how you kids never pick up the phone when she calls anyways.
Day ain’t over yet.
You might chip in a quarter if they’ll take your MIL, too.
For that, I’d pay the whole thing and borrow money from the mob.
Flying to Hawaii tomorrow.
Folks in El Paso aren’t enjoying the same reality, I understand and give a hearty chuckle.
Going back to your native homeland, eh?
it’s all about ohana
Fozz on Ice
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mVrGHmFPIYW7NIB_aTgoYc4AJkTJzRCn/view?usp=sharing
7/10
Good form.