Sexy Friday – 20260619

TGIF! USA! USA! USA! USA! Also, congrats to Our Hat for their first win, sorry about Koné.

Word Count Filler Time

Think your airport visit was bad? Check out Nasseri! If you’ve seen the movie The Terminal you’ll know all of this already.

This Iranian went to Great Britain for school, then demonstrated against the shah of Iran. Iran reacted reasonably and threw in him jail upon his return before being expelled and told to never return. He returned to Europe and bounced around for a few years before he was given permanent refugee status in Europe. He then proceeded to settle in Belgium.

Then things started going bad. A few years later, he mailed his refugee card to the United Nations thinking he didn’t need it anymore. After that he was robbed in Paris and his remaining travel documents were stolen. Bizarrely, without any documentation, he then flew to London after somehow talking his way onto the plane.

London was not so kind and sent him back to Paris. They arrested him for illegally entering the country. Of course, without any papers, they couldn’t let him in the country, but they also couldn’t deport him. So they did what any shrewd bureaucrat would do: nothing.

So starting in 1988 he took up residence in the airport on a red plastic bench. He relied on the hospitality of travelers for food and used the men’s room for showering, shaving, and shitting. In 1992, his lawyer got UN officials to issue him a new refugee card with the stipulation that he had to appear in person to collect it, even though the Belgium government wouldn’t admit him to the country. In 1995, the Belgium government relented and said they would allow him to enter but with the stipulations that he would have to stay in Belgium and be subject to supervision by a social worker. Nasseri refused because he wanted to live in Great Britain.

In 1999, UN officials came to their senses and mailed Nasseri his refugee card and France issued him identity papers. He was finally free! Not so fast my friend. Nasseri refused to sign the French identity papers because the listed his nationality as Iran and he disowned them. Also he wanted to be identified by Alfred Sir, the nickname he was given by the airport workers. In not so surprising news, the airport’s doctor said he had some mental issues.

2003 came around and DreamWorks paid him $275,000 for his story to create The Terminal. This changed nothing except he could now pay for his own way at the airport restaurants. 3 years later he finally left the airport. But, spoiler alert, not of his own volition. His health failed him and he was transported to a local hospital. About six months later he got out of the hospital was then treated the airport’s French Red Cross in hotel near the airport. He then moved to a Paris shelter in 2008 where he stayed until his death in 2022. Although, there are reports he moved back into the airport in the months prior to his passing.

The point is, don’t complain about your little delays in the airport, and do not, under any circumstance, lose or mail your id cards and passports. Let’s go kick some balls, or at least watch some other capable men do so.

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Sexy Time

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!